Bottlebrush Creek

by Maya Linnell

  No matter what he’d done as a boy or teenager, he’d never felt like it was enough to earn his father’s approval, or match Max’s accomplishments. Even after Max had gambled away their money and buggered off to Uruguay, he still seemed to retain John’s favour. Rob hadn’t expected their father to compensate him for the money Max had lost—it wasn’t John’s debt to settle—but a little more empathy for the way his dreams had been crushed in the process wouldn’t have gone astray either.

  And no matter how hard he twisted the throttle, he knew he couldn’t outrun the past.

  Thirty-six

  The lawn around Port Fairview’s old railway precinct was flush with excited youngsters and so many cheering parents that Angie almost expected some of them to break out the pompoms and cheerleader moves.

  ‘Faster, faster! Come on, Jayden, put your arms into it, mate. Go, go, go!’

  Bobbi clapped as her son blitzed the field at the Kinder Olympics, leaving Angie in little doubt that Bobbi had begun coaching him well ahead of the day.

  ‘You do realise it’s not the real Olympics,’ said Angie, watching Claudia and Scarlett skip across the line hand in hand, almost a minute after Jayden had raced through.

  ‘Start as you mean to go on, I say,’ said Bobbi, telling Jayden he’d run faster if he kept his eyes focused on the finish line.

  Angie headed over to congratulate the girls for trying their best. She followed the children to the next activity station, and then the next, until sports day was finished and the back of her neck was more than a little sunburned.

  ‘Hey, Angie, wait up.’

  She turned to see Tessa jogging across the grass in an oversized sundress. ‘What’s up Bobbi’s nose today?’

  ‘Don’t know. I’m not in her good books because I skipped the last few runs,’ said Angie.

  ‘Reckon she’s found her niche: Bossy Bobbi in her element.’ ‘Don’t tell me you’ve heard Rob’s little nickname? I’ll throttle him, honest to god,’ said Angie.

  Tessa looked down at her sandals. ‘If you’re going to throttle someone, it should be me for starting the whole thing. It slipped out a few months ago, then Brett started using it. I felt terrible when I discovered Rob was calling her that too.’

  ‘You? Tessa, I’ve never heard you breathe a bad word about anyone.’

  Tessa’s rosy complexion turned a deeper shade of pink. ‘You’ve got to admit, she’s a bit … hard to like. Everything’s a competition. The way she’s using you for free childcare. Trying to mould you into a poster-girl client.’

  Angie laughed. ‘It’s already a circus with Claudia and they entertain each other mostly. And whether I liked it or not, I needed a wake-up call. Bobbi’s made me healthier than I’ve ever been. As soon as I get back into the fitness training, I’ll be smashing those runs.’

  ‘I didn’t mean … Look, I know things have been tough. Brett mentioned the whole finance thing last night. Renovations, hey? Probably doesn’t sit easy letting Rosa help you out, either, after the whole biting incident. I won’t tell anyone, promise. But I’m here if you want to talk.’

  Angie’s jaw tightened. Rosa may have nearly killed them with kindness and smothered them with baked goods, but she had nothing at all to do with their finances. Did she? Angie fussed with her water bottle so Tessa couldn’t see her confusion.

  ‘Look, I need to go, Rob’ll be home from work soon.’

  Or heading off on another motorbike ride.

  She drove faster than usual through Port Fairview. What does Rosa have to do with our budget and why am I the only one who doesn’t know anything about it? It was past Rob’s normal knock-off time when Angie returned from the sports day but he was nowhere to be seen. The smell of coffee lingered in the shed and she spotted a note Blu-Tacked to the bathroom door.

  Back late. Don’t wait up. Love you x R

  Angie tipped Rob’s half-drunk mug of coffee down the drain and stripped off her sweaty shirt. A shower did little to improve her mood, and by the time she’d scrubbed herself pink, pulled on a clean pair of jeans and eaten an apple for afternoon tea she was still livid. Rob’s out riding, Rosa’s been sticking her nose into our business again and I’m completely out of the loop.

  ‘Feeding time, Mum?’ Claudia’s question distracted Angie from her brooding. The calves bellowed at the gate, the goats bleated and Violet barked until Angie unclipped her from the kennel. Even the chickens started clucking as soon as she came near, demanding to be fed. Angie resisted the urge to clamp her hands over her ears and drown out the sound of their mounting responsibilities.

  She filled a bucket with calf pellets and hesitated, checking the underside of her boots. Dog poo caked into the tread. She cursed Rob again and wondered whether she needed to feed the goats in the next paddock. Darn goats. Not only are they not cash, they’re now costing us money, she grumbled, tossing a bale of hay over the fence.

  Angie dialled Rob’s number but the call rang out again.

  For God’s sake, what is he up to?

  ‘Play with calves, Mummy?’

  Angie swung Claudia up for a piggyback. ‘Not now, Claud. We’re off to see Granny and Pop.’

  Claudia clapped. Angie strode across the paddock, wishing she felt a hint of Claudia’s excitement and optimism instead of dread with each step towards the dairy.

  John and Rosa’s conversation ground to a surprised halt as Angie walked in.

  ‘Is everything okay? Not more pigs again?’ Rosa rushed along the pit towards them, her eyes saucer-wide.

  ‘I can’t get in touch with Rob and I’ve got no idea what the hell’s going on with our finances. But apparently you do, Rosa.’

  John stopped working his way across the dairy and straightened up, uncertainty etched on his tanned face. ‘I don’t follow.’ He turned to his wife.

  Rosa wiped her hands on her overalls, not meeting Angie’s eye as she sprayed the cows’ udders. ‘Angie, please,’ she said, ‘you’re tired, you’re obviously not sleeping well. How about we have a chat when Rob’s back? Is he home tonight or are the boys heading out hunting again?’

  Max strode into the dairy. He wore the same khaki overalls and plastic apron as his parents, and when he lifted a hand in greeting, she spotted her name at the top of the invoice he was holding.

  ‘Hate to interrupt, but the stock agent left a delivery in the feed shed. As well as our stuff, there’s a heap of drench and calf pellets, plus a few things for you and Rob. Beats me why they’re on the same invoice though,’ he said.

  ‘Rosa?’ John said, ushering a fresh run of cows onto the platform. His face looked calm, but Angie heard an edge in his careful voice.

  ‘It’s only a loan. Only a tiny little bridging loan until Rob’s business accounts are straightened out.’ Rosa began to work as she spoke, zigzagging back and forth across the dairy until the other row of cows was completely hooked up. Max pulled the gate open to release the row. Claudia followed John to the stairs, and pressed the button to dole out the next batch of grain.

  Angie tried to get a grip on her anger before she spoke again. A fear of spooking the cows was the only thing stopping her from shouting across the dairy. ‘Why did he tell you and not me? How much money? When?’

  Rosa mumbled a figure, and for a moment Angie thought she was going to puke on the dairy floor.

  John swore quietly. ‘I thought you weren’t going to meddle, Rosa.’

  ‘I’m not meddling, I’m helping. Don’t be upset, Angie. Rob wanted to tell you, he really did, but he worried it might be the straw that broke the camel’s back. Especially with your friend and those—’ Rosa’s voice rang with apology but Angie cut over her.

  ‘Just stop, Rosa.’ If Rob can’t trust me—won’t confide in me—then how will we ever make a home together?

  Her voice dropped dangerously low. ‘So he ran over here and told you instead, Rosa? Great. Just great. Come on, Claudia, time to leave.’ Angie held out her hand, her anger at Rosa intensifying as Claudia huddled c
loser to John. ‘Claudia!’

  The little girl tucked her chin and shook her head.

  ‘We can bring her back aft—’ Rosa fell silent after a sharp look from John.

  ‘I want to stay with Granny and Pop. Princess Sparkles and Peppa calf will be missing me.’

  Angie’s stomach dropped.

  Was she the thorn in everyone’s side here? Rob, John, Rosa, Claudia, Max … For all her ideals about nestling into this neighbourhood, about helping the Jones boys fix their rift, had it been her that didn’t fit in all along? Her that didn’t belong here?

  Angie backed away. A silent sob rose through her body as she turned and ran from the dairy.

  Thirty-seven

  Angie flung open the shed door, making a beeline for the pile of stacker boxes, the closest thing they had to an office. She pulled every last piece of paperwork from the folders within but there were no bank statements or budget spreadsheets to be seen.

  She wasn’t sure who she was angriest with: Rob for messing up the budget, herself for trusting him, or Rosa for always waiting in the wings, so that Rob confided in his mother and not her.

  She snapped open the laptop, stabbing the power button until the screen lit up. Angie gasped as she logged into their online banking. The account balance before J&R Jones’ transfer had been even lower than she’d imagined. She leaned against the wall and slid down to the floorboards.

  How did things go so very wrong? And where do we go from here?

  The sound of laughter and a creaking swing filtered in from the backyard.

  Which Jones was standing outside right now, pushing her daughter on the swing? Rosa, with an armful of cakes and an open wallet, trying to play happy families? John, who had looked as surprised as her about his wife’s loan? Or Max, whose reputation for upsetting the applecart had just been one-upped?

  Her heart ached knowing it wasn’t Rob outside right now. She’d driven him so far away he hadn’t even been able to share their deepest financial woes.

  She glimpsed her reflection in the shed window. Her hair was like a bird’s nest, the brown T-shirt she wore was one that Bobbi had ordered her to banish as soon as she’d lost weight, and the red splotches on her face had merged with her freckles. You can’t stick at anything long, can you, Angie McIntyre? Whether it’s a relationship, a renovation or some stupid fitness program. What right do you even have to this beautiful cottage?

  Her lip trembled as she stared back at her reflection, seeing the teenage girl who let the schoolyard taunts erode her self-confidence, and then the adult who had gotten so close to being the mother, the wife, the woman she’d aspired to be. So close.

  She exhaled shakily. Shielding her eyes from the sun, she walked outside.

  ‘You right?’ Max said, pushing Claudia on the swing.

  Angie lifted one shoulder, clamping her lips shut so her voice couldn’t betray her.

  Max wrapped an arm around her, his scent so different from Rob’s. She felt her body shake.

  ‘It’ll be okay,’ he said gruffly, patting her back with one hand. His awkward sympathy made her cry even harder.

  Claudia wrapped her arms around Angie’s legs just as Rob’s motorbike roared down Enderby Lane. ‘All better, Mummy. Daddy home now,’ said Claudia.

  Angie pulled away from Max, not knowing whether to thank him or apologise.

  She stalked toward Rob.

  ‘Why didn’t you tell me about your mum and the money?’ she said.

  Rob stiffened. ‘I didn’t know she’d given Ivan any extra money until this week, and I’ve fixed it all up now. I was going to explain.’

  ‘Ivan? What the … ? I’m talking about the cash your mother put in our bank account. What do you mean she gave Ivan money?’ Angie thought of the real estate agent accepting their low offer on the cottage without any hesitation. What was it the old man had said about looking after Rob with the house?

  Angie gasped. ‘My God.’ How could I have been so oblivious? ‘I’ll strangle her. I’ll … What else are you hiding from me?’

  Claudia raced back to the sandpit. Max backed away. ‘I’ll be over at the dairy if you need me,’ he said.

  She could feel the tension rolling off Rob in waves, his expression so far from that of the carefree man she’d rescued from the side of the road with a broken-down bike, or the doting father.

  ‘Jesus, Rob, why didn’t you tell me?’

  Rob kneeled down and picked up a builder’s pencil from the driveway. The chunky wood had split almost in half, no doubt crushed under the wheel of a delivery van or tradesmen’s ute. The wide lead was the only thing holding the two sides of timber together. Rob wiped the lead pencil back and forth across the palm of his hand.

  ‘I wanted to tell you. Apparently it was supposed to be an early wedding present.’

  Angie’s eyes were glued to the lead pencil, captivated by the way it drew white lines, then red welts, on his calloused skin.

  Her throat pinched. She swallowed hard. ‘But we weren’t even engaged then. She can’t just throw money around like she’s waving a magic wand, and mess in people’s lives like that. Maybe we were kidding ourselves this would work …’ Her voice trailed off, the reality setting in as she said it aloud. It shouldn’t be this hard.

  Angie knew she should be fighting for their relationship, telling Rob every reason they should stay together, but she stayed quiet. Is it over? That Rob was equally silent confirmed it.

  Rob closed the distance between them with a step. His eyes pooled with tears. ‘I thought I could get on top of the finances and fix this mess I’d gotten us into.’

  Angie backed away. ‘Bobbi told me we were playing with fire trying to do this together. I should have …’

  She watched the builder’s pencil fall from Rob’s hand and onto the driveway. The two pieces of timber split on impact and the lead shattered into the bluestone gravel.

  Rob kicked at the dirt. ‘I mightn’t know much, but I know she’s not your friend.’

  Angie shook her head, unable to fathom losing anything more in a single day. ‘What are you talking about?’

  Rob’s words came thick and fast. ‘Can’t you see she’s only using you as a babysitter and her very own fixer-upper, Ange? She wanted you to be her big success story, someone she could parade around as an example of her fine work. But she was never doing it for you, she was doing it for herself. Damned if you weren’t happier with a mixing bowl in your hand. And don’t get me started on her husband, always flashing his wealth about.’

  Angie backed away. ‘Don’t point the finger at my friends. Not much use baking when you’ve got your mum next door though, is it? I wanted to fix this cottage for us—for you, me and Claudia—but I’d barely even hung the first load of washing on the line before your mum made me surplus to requirements. My mum would never have gotten between us like that.’

  ‘At least she’s trying to help, not sabotage us like Bobbi and Alex. He’s behind those pigs in the scrub. He’ll stop at nothing to keep his precious clients entertained.’

  Angie threw her hands in the air. ‘Seriously? Why the hell would Alex do that?’ She noticed the old tractor over by the chook yard and her anger rose further. She cut over Rob’s reply.

  ‘And your dad’s tractor has been here for weeks, just waiting to shift that pile of weatherboards. Claudia fell off it and nearly cracked her head the other day.’

  She was shouting now, unable to stop the torrent of furious words. She felt Claudia tugging at her skirt.

  ‘Mummy?’

  Get a grip, Angie. You’re scaring Claudia. But as much as she tried, she couldn’t rein herself in.

  ‘She’s a …’ Angie spluttered. ‘A meddling old cow who stretches the truth to suit herself. I can see where you get it from.’

  Rob stepped back as if he’d been punched. He’d spent the morning haggling over a price for his motorbike collection, then the afternoon tracking down the owner of the Land Cruiser ute Max had captured on camera, bu
t the sting in Ange’s words meant the cheque in his top pocket and uncovering Alex Richardson’s illegal hunting sideline were too little too late. The money from selling his bikes might fund the rest of the build, and the evidence against Alex might earn the smug prick a whopper of a fine, but it wouldn’t repair the trust he’d broken.

  His thoughts latched onto possible solutions to the problems that had pushed their relationship off course, scanning and dismissing the ideas as quickly as they arrived. Ange deserved so much better than him, than a half-finished cottage and God knows how many more months living in the shed.

  He thought of Max standing beside Angie earlier, giving her the emotional support he should have. The sudden realisation of his failings scared him to the core.

  He kissed Claudia’s forehead. She shouldn’t be witnessing this. ‘I can’t … I can’t do this anymore.’

  Rob ducked past Angie and lurched to the shed. Craving cold, hard metal and horsepower as an escape was yet another weakness, but at this point what was one more cock-up?

  He ripped his leather jacket off the coat rack.

  ‘Oh, great idea, Rob, go run away on your bike again. Like that will solve anything,’ said Angie, walking towards him.

  He hesitated, one hand on the motorbike helmet. Maybe it isn’t too late.

  Rob exhaled slowly. ‘Okay, I won’t go.’

  Angie shot him a scathing look and the force when she shoved him away surprised them both. He stumbled backwards, almost falling into the sidecar.

  ‘Do whatever the hell you want, Rob.’

  Claudia burst into tears.

  I’m damned if I do, damned if I don’t.

  Shame made him shove the helmet down hard on his head, but the padding inside the helmet that silenced Claudia’s crying only amplified the voice inside that ridiculed him for running away.

  Rob’s hands trembled as he buckled up the helmet strap, a difficult task with his painfully clenched jaw. He shrugged on his jacket, throwing a leg over the Harley-Davidson that was effectively already someone else’s property.