Revenge Runs Deep

by Pat Young

  ‘That was quick.’

  ‘She said it was easy. Ruby was feeling a bit down when Violet went in to visit her and looked about thirty years younger when she left. She says the old dear is so up for it.’

  ‘I hope Sheila knows what she’s doing.’

  ‘I’m sure she does. I think we should relax. It’s going to work.’

  Marty looked round, startled by the sound of the door opening. Chance pranced towards her, as delighted to see her as if she’d been gone for a week.

  ‘Oops, Chance seems to think I’m playing hide and seek. Lie down, boy.’

  ‘He’s a cool dog. I’ve been thinking I might get a dog, once I’m settled.’

  ‘Speaking of settled, anything to report?’

  ‘Think I’ve found the perfect place to build. I’ll tell you when I see you.’

  ‘I’m excited. Tell me now.’

  Chance got to his feet. She watched him amble to the door and greet his master.

  ‘Marty?’

  ‘David! Don’t sneak up on me! How long have you been standing there?’

  David seemed surprised at her tone. ‘Sorry. I came to offer you a cup of coffee while you’re chatting, but I see you’ve got one.’ He turned and walked away.

  ‘Shit,’ she whispered into the phone.

  ‘What happened? Was that your husband?’

  ‘Yeah, and I’ve no idea how long he was standing there.’

  ‘How much do you think he heard?’

  ‘I haven’t a clue. Did we say anything incriminating?’

  Joe took some time before he answered. ‘No, I don’t think so. I can’t remember word for word, but I don’t think you said anything suspicious.’

  ‘Look, I need to get off the phone. Damage limitation and all that.’

  ‘Yeah, go. Maybe see you in the park later?’

  ‘Maybe. Bye.’

  David was in the kitchen. She made an effort to smile and said, ‘Sorry to be snippy. You made me jump. I didn’t hear you come in.’

  David kept his back turned. Marty tried to recall her side of the conversation. Had she been flirty with Joe? Had she given away any information about their plans? All that stuff about trusting Sheila. How must that have sounded? ‘I’ll have that coffee with you now, if you don’t mind?’

  ‘Why don’t you make your own, Marty? That seems to be the way you prefer to do things these days. On your own.’ David plonked a teabag in a cup, stirred violently and banged the spoon several times on the rim. He knew how much she hated that. When he turned and walked past her, Chance gave her a knowing look and followed David out of the kitchen.

  ***

  CHAPTER 46

  Joe watched the last of his furniture and belongings being loaded into the back of a removals van. It was time to say goodbye. Time to move on.

  He rubbed at his face. A shave and a shower would be a good idea before Marty arrived to help him ‘deep-clean’ the flat. The purchasers had paid a premium to get a very early move-in date, not knowing how well it suited Joe to get his hands on their money. This time tomorrow, the new folk would be in and he’d be four hundred grand richer.

  The doorbell rang.

  ‘Chance not with you?’ he asked, as Marty dumped a huge Ikea bag full of cleaning products and took off her coat.

  ‘No, he would have been an idiot. Sliding like Bambi on newly mopped floors.’

  Joe smiled at the image. ‘Don’t you need the dog as a cover for being here?’

  ‘No, David’s gone to play golf, as usual. Anyway, I can give a friend a helping hand without having to ask his permission.’

  ‘Oooh, prickly,’ he said, with a smile to let her know he was joking.

  ‘Actually, he’s being a bit of an arse. I’m worried he overheard us on the phone. I think he might suspect there’s something going on.’

  ‘Has he said anything?’

  ‘No, but confrontation’s not his style.’

  ‘You’re just stressed with organizing everything. Come on. Relax.’ Without thinking, he grabbed her in a hug. He was surprised how good it felt to have a woman in his arms again.

  With a pang of regret, pain, guilt, maybe all three, he realised how much he missed physical contact with another human being. Enjoying the closeness, he whispered, ‘You’ve been amazing, thanks.’

  Did Marty cling on a second too long? It was enough to make the moment awkward. She must have felt it too because she became brusque, thumping him on the arm and walking through to the kitchen. ‘You’re right. I’m being neurotic.’ She surveyed the room, rubbing her hands together. ‘We should start in here. If you leave the kitchen and bathroom spotless, your buyers will love you forever. I brought my own rubber gloves and a pair of extra-large for you.’

  She handed him a plastic bucket. ‘Make yourself useful and fill this, will you?’

  ‘Would you like a coffee? I’ve kept two old mugs and the kettle.’

  ‘To be honest, Joe, I’d rather have one when we’ve finished here. Whenever I start a job, I prefer to see it through to the end.’

  ‘Okay, you’re right, let’s crack on.’

  They worked in silence for a while then Joe said, ‘So we’re ready to roll in two days’ time?’

  ‘Indeed we are. I hope we haven’t missed anything.’

  ‘If we have, and I doubt it, someone will think of it before tonight’s meeting.’

  ‘I keep running it through in my mind. I see Violet and Ruby being picked up by Smeaton at Briargrove, then I start to panic. What if he recognizes Sheila? What if he won’t stop at the place we’ve agreed for the snatch? I’m driving myself mad. I want to get on with it now.’

  ‘I know. I feel the same way. Listen, is that your phone?’

  Marty ran for her coat and retrieved her mobile from the pocket. Joe heard her say, ‘Oh hi, David.’ Something in her voice made him look up, expecting to see her in the doorway. But she didn’t come into the lounge. She stayed in the hallway and continued her conversation.

  Joe was scouring the sink when she came back into the room and said, ‘I need to go.’

  ***

  CHAPTER 47

  When she got home, David was in the kitchen, waiting for her. She found it hard to read his expression. She tried to make her voice light, ‘Didn’t expect to see you home this early. Golf rained off?’

  ‘I didn’t play golf.’

  ‘Okay.’ She had no idea what else to say.

  ‘Marty, I’m not very good at this stuff.’

  ‘What stuff?’

  ‘Emotions. Intrigue. Pretence. All that stuff.’

  Oh God, he knew. ‘David, we should talk.’ Marty felt nauseous.

  ‘No time for that. You need to pack your bags.’

  ‘What are you talking about?’ Surely he wasn’t throwing her out? Bile rose in her throat.

  ‘You’re leaving.’

  Marty swallowed hard. ‘I don’t understand.’

  ‘Understand this. You are going to Paris.’

  ‘When?’

  ‘This weekend.’

  Her legs gave way and she flopped onto a kitchen chair. Paris? She couldn’t go to Paris. And yet, how could she refuse? David was grinning at her, clearly delighted to see her so shocked.

  ‘Gotcha!’

  Marty exhaled for a very long moment. ‘You certainly did.’

  ‘Paris. City of lovers, isn’t that what they call it?’

  ‘Yeah, something like that,’ said Marty, distracted by dozens of thoughts clamoring for her attention. ‘What made you think of this?’

  He took her hands and pulled her off the chair into his arms. It felt strange and artificial. ‘I decided to do something spontaneous for once, to surprise you.’

  ‘You certainly pulled that off.’

  ‘And maybe I’ve been neglecting you a bit. I’m going to try harder from now on, promise.’ He leaned in close and touched her lips with his.

  She turned her face and said, ‘When will we be back?’<
br />
  ‘Sunday night.’ He smacked her bottom and pushed her away. ‘Now go and get packed. As for dinner tonight? I’ve got it all organized.’

  ***

  CHAPTER 48

  For fear of being overheard in a pub, Sheila had suggested having their final meeting at her place.

  ‘Marty’s going to be late. If she can make it at all.’

  ‘Is Marty okay? Is something wrong?’

  ‘She didn’t say, Joe. Just that she would be in touch later on and that we should run through the final details. She sent me her spreadsheet, look.’

  Carole giggled. ‘You are honoured.’

  ‘I know. Right, let’s take it from the top. Joe, you’ll head up to the bothy on Friday afternoon and make sure everything is ready for Saturday. Marty will drop me round the corner from Briargrove on Saturday morning, complete with picnic. Then she’ll meet you, Joe, and you’ll drive up to the bothy together. She’ll bring all the food. I’ll be at Briargrove no later than ten to eleven. That should give me time to brief Ruby before Smeaton arrives to pick us up.’

  ‘You’ll be dressed as Violet?’ asked Joe.

  ‘Yes.’

  ‘And you’ll dump his car then morph into Sheila, right?’

  ‘That’s right, I’ll have Sheila clothes under my Violet gear. A little extra padding does not look out of place on an elderly lady. Think of Mrs Doubtfire.’

  Joe didn’t laugh. He looked like a dog with a bone. ‘What will you do with Violet’s stuff?’

  ‘Thought of that. The shopping centre has a big wheelie bin on each floor. Violet’s gear will end up in one of them. Inside a black bag.’

  ‘And the leftover picnic stuff? You can’t dump that at the shopping centre, or at least not the special drink you’re going to give Smeaton.’

  ‘I’ll rinse out his cup and get rid of it and all the other rubbish and leftovers in a bin in one of the laybys. They’re always full of discarded food wrappers and drink bottles, even at this time of the year. I noticed the other day. That sound okay, Joe?’

  Joe was nodding his head. ‘Yes, Sheila, better than okay. Sorry, I don’t mean to be picky.’

  ‘I know. You want to make sure we haven’t missed anything. I understand. That’s good.’

  Sheila continued with details of the plan, including the signals that would tell which picnic spot they were in and when she was ready for them to come and collect Smeaton.

  ‘And then it’s over to you guys. I’ll drop Ruby back at Briargrove, ditch Smeaton’s car, do a bit of shopping in town, acting normal, and head home on the bus.’

  ‘Sounds perfect, and you’re sure of the dose you need to give him?’ asked Carole.

  ‘Yes, I worked it all out after you got Smeaton to reveal his weight. Joe double-checked the dose, and the pills are ready for me to dissolve in his drink.’

  ‘I heard that stuff turns blue if it’s used to spike a drink,’ said Carole.

  ‘You’re right,’ said Joe, ‘but the stuff I sent for stays clear. We tried some in a few different drinks to make sure. It will work particularly well in Smeaton’s favourite.’

  ‘Then, as I said, it’s over to you guys.’ Sheila looked at Joe.

  Carole said, ‘How long are you planning on keeping him?’

  ‘As long as it takes,’ said Joe.

  ‘A couple of days,’ said Sheila. ‘Three at the most, we reckon. Right, do we need to run through the plans again, or are we good to go?’

  ‘I think we’re good to go. The video camera is in place and the projector so we can watch. The white noise is downloaded and the speakers have been checked. Yip, all sorted.’

  Carole raised her hand like a little kid. ‘Sorry to sound dim, but what’s white noise?’

  ‘It’s a kind of whooshing, soothing, water-gushing sound that masks distracting noises.’

  ‘People use it to soothe babies. My friend’s daughter has it going all night long.’

  ‘Have you listened to it, Joe?’

  ‘Yeah. I think it sounds like someone pouring a never-ending bag of rice into a giant bowl. Should keep old Smeaton from hearing any sounds from outside the bothy.’

  ‘What a great idea. You guys have thought of everything.’

  ‘One thing we haven’t thought about is alibis,’ said Joe.

  ‘I’ll be in the States, so that’s mine sorted,’ said Carole. ‘But why would you need an alibi?’

  ‘Just to be on the safe side. You never know. Say something happens and Smeaton claims we kidnapped him.’

  Sheila burst out laughing. ‘That’s ridiculous, Joe. But I’ll be sure to watch all the programmes from that weekend on iPlayer so I can say I’ve been home in front of the TV like a good wee spinster schoolteacher.’

  ‘It’s never gonna happen, but still, I like to cover all bases. I’ll say I was at the bothy, clearing up and closing down. The lads will vouch for me, if need be. They owe me a favour or two.’

  When Sheila’s doorbell rang, the three of them said, ‘That’ll be Marty.’

  Chance burst into the room first followed by a very flustered Marty. ‘I haven’t got long. David thinks I’m walking the dog but I had to grab a taxi.’

  Joe stood and put his arm round her shoulders. ‘Are you okay?’

  ‘Yes, I’m okay.’ She stepped away from him. ‘Folks, I’m sorry but I’m going to Paris for the weekend. My husband decided to surprise me.’

  ‘What about our plans, Marty?’ Joe touched her arm.

  ‘We’ll need to put them on hold. You guys will have to work out how.’ Grabbing her dog by the collar, she said, ‘Sorry, I have to run. The cab’s waiting for me. Let’s go, Chance.’

  ‘Wow,’ said Sheila, ‘I didn’t see that one coming. What do we do now? Call it off?’

  Joe groaned like a man who’d set fire to a winning lottery ticket. ‘No, we don’t call it off. We have to put everything on hold, as she says. Not much else we can do.’

  ‘A week’s delay isn’t so awful. It’s not ideal, when we’re all ready for action, but it isn’t the end of the world.’

  ‘You’re right. What’s the worst thing that can happen? Smeaton might have plans for next weekend? Carole will help us get round that, one way or another, won’t you, Carole?’

  ‘Is anyone else thinking this is fate? Telling us to stop?’ asked Carole. ‘Or is it just me?’

  ‘Are you kidding?’ said Joe. ‘Stop now, after all this planning? All that hard work at the bothy? No way.’

  ‘I agree,’ said Sheila, ‘we can’t let one small setback stop us now. I’m determined to see it through, for Liz’s sake. Any idea what’s in his diary for next weekend, Carole?’

  ‘Would you believe he’s due at a conference?’

  ‘Fuck,’ said Joe quietly, rubbing at his face.

  ‘We have to stay cool,’ said Sheila, ‘and think.’

  ‘I know he’s not that keen to go to the conference. It’s about leadership and, don’t choke when I say this, Smeaton thinks he’s an expert on good leadership. He’s offended that he wasn’t invited to be a keynote speaker. He’s been moaning the face off me all week about how he shouldn’t have to attend as an ordinary delegate.’

  ‘So,’ said Sheila, warming to the challenge of finding a solution, ‘You don’t think he would be heartbroken if the conference were to be cancelled at short notice?’

  ‘I think he’d be delighted.’

  ‘Okay then, folks, tell me what you think of this. Late next Friday, Carole, you tell Smeaton that you’ve had a call from the conference organisers. There’s a problem at the venue, a burst pipe is always a good one, puts the toilets out of commission. Say he will hear from them with a revised date, apologies etc.’

  When the others nodded their approval, she went on, ‘Joe, could you call the conference organisers pretending to be Smeaton? Explain that your elderly mother has gone down with flu and you’ll need to spend the weekend with her.’

  ‘Great idea,’ said Joe.


  ‘Ask if you could have your conference fee refunded, that’ll make it sound more genuine. There’s no chance but it’s the kind of question folk always ask.’

  ‘Good thinking,’ said Joe, his voice full of admiration.

  ‘And I’ll tip off Ruby. Carole, will you tell Smeaton you’ve had a call from Briargrove to say Ruby doesn’t want visitors this weekend?’

  ‘Why don’t I tell him there’s been an outbreak of norovirus?’

  ‘What’s norovirus?’ asked Joe.

  ‘Also known as winter vomiting bug but that doesn’t mention the diarrhoea that comes with it.’

  ‘Yuck,’ said Joe, ‘too much information.’

  ‘Spreads through these places like wildfire. Effectively shuts them down till they get the all clear.’

  ‘Reminds me of an absence note I once got from a mother, telling me that “wee Jimmy had the diarrhoea and it was all through the house”. Still makes me smile.’

  ‘Well, I’m not smiling,’ said Joe. ‘In fact, I think I might vomit myself.’

  ‘Norovirus is an inspired suggestion, Carole. Smeaton will run a hundred miles.’

  ‘Like me,’ said Joe.

  Sheila felt pleased with their quick thinking and looked at the others. ‘So are we sorted? Same plan as before, one week later?’

  Carole’s brows were knotted in a frown. ‘Em, there’s just one problem. Wednesday is my last day at work. We leave for the States on Thursday.’

  ***

  CHAPTER 49

  Marty was polishing furniture that didn’t need polishing when the phone rang. Glad of the interruption, she found her mobile and picked up.

  ‘Can you talk?’

  ‘Yes, David’s out.’

  ‘How was Paris?’

  ‘It’s a beautiful city.’

  ‘That’s not what I meant.’

  ‘Joe, I went to Paris with my husband and we had a lovely time.’

  ‘That’s all you’re going to say?’

  ‘What else can I say? It was a wonderful surprise and David was great fun to be away with. He spoiled me rotten. Hey, wait a minute, are you jealous?’