by Shea Balik
Suddenly Parker threw the piece of wood he’d been caressing across the room hard enough that it became embedded in a log that made up the wall. And the dam broke. Parker slid to the floor crying as he railed about how unfair life was. How he hated his mother for making him pretend to be someone he wasn’t. How he didn’t want to lose the best thing that had ever happened to him, but he just didn’t know how he could make that choice.
Aidan got down on the floor and embraced Parker as the man continued to sob. Tears were running down Aidan’s cheeks as he held his friend tight enough that Parker would know he wasn’t alone.
When darkness fell, Aidan insisted Parker come stay with him. In his state of mind, Aidan didn’t think Parker should be anywhere near his mother. Not to mention, Aidan didn’t feel comfortable leaving Parker with no one to talk to while he was going through this. His friend was tortured with an impossible decision, and Aidan didn’t know what Parker might do when feeling that hopeless.
Aidan picked up fast food for both of them on the way home because he didn’t have much to eat in the house. Once home they ate and he made up the second bedroom before they went to the living room and watched some TV. He could tell Parker wasn’t really watching, and he left Parker to his thoughts, just being there in case the man needed to talk again.
When midnight came and Aidan was nearly asleep on the couch, he looked over to see Parker still sitting there staring blankly at the screen. “Do you want to talk about it some more?”
“What would you do?” Parker asked.
“I don’t think—”
“No really. What would you do? If you had to choose between your family and the man you’re in love with, the man who you could easily see spending the rest of your life with, who would you choose?”
Aidan really didn’t want to answer the question. No matter which way he went, he felt like he would sway Parker one way or the other. Yet, he could see how much Parker wanted — no, needed — to know.
Despite his reservations, Aidan told him what he thought. “I guess, for me it would come down to who you can’t live without.” He knew it was a bullshit answer, but Aidan refused to be responsible for Parker’s decision.
He totally agreed that the choice was a horrible one to have to make, but in the end, Parker was the one who was going to have to live with it, not Aidan.
CHAPTER 12
Zane pulled into his parents’ driveway with Jesse and Ethan. All three seemed to be struggling with their issues. Zane wasn’t entirely sure what was going on with Ethan, but he was pretty sure it had to do with Bram, the pub owner. They’d been spending a lot of time together recently.
By the time they got out of the car, his mom was standing on the front porch waiting for them. His dad came out just as they reached the door. After a round of hugs for both his parents, they all headed indoors.
His childhood home was a one-story brick house with a hallway off to the left of the living room that led to three bedrooms. The kitchen and dining room were to the right of the living room, with the garage off the kitchen. It wasn’t fancy, but it was home.
While his mom gave Ethan the tour, Zane went to check on dinner. After making sure nothing was burning, he went to the living room to find Jesse crying while his father talked softly. Not wanting to interrupt, Zane decided to set the table.
After about fifteen minutes, one of the timers went off, but Zane had no idea which dish it was for. Because his mom was still with Ethan somewhere in the house, Zane turned off the oven and pulled everything out. At least nothing would burn.
“Where’s your mom?” Zane’s dad asked.
Zane shrugged. “I think she’s talking with Ethan. I took everything out, but I’m not really sure what the timer was for.”
Before his dad went in search of his mother, he came over and gave Zane a hug. “After dinner we’ll talk about whatever is bothering you.”
Zane stared after his father with his mouth open. How did he know? Sometimes it was eerie how his dad seemed to just know things. Like when Zane had come out, he would have sworn his father had already known.
Dinner was somewhat somber. Both Jesse and Ethan had clearly been crying. Maybe they shouldn’t have come. The last thing his mom needed was for the three of them to cry on her shoulder after everything she’d been through.
Although she assured him she was fine, Zane didn’t like stressing her out. They hardly said more than a few words during dinner. When dinner was finally over, Zane and his dad offered to do the dishes while the others relaxed in the living room.
“So, son, want to talk about it?” His dad had started washing dishes while Zane was bringing in the last of glasses.
He grabbed the Tupperware and went to work putting the leftovers away as he tried to figure out how to talk about his love life with his father.
“Just spit it out, son. I accepted a long time ago you were gay, so you don’t have to worry about it being about a guy.” His dad never ceased to amaze him.
Putting the lids on the leftovers he said, “I’ve met a man and I really like him. Well, I guess I’m really attracted to him since I hardly know him enough to like him.”
Now that he had started talking it was getting easier to talk to his father. “Except he’s the project manager for the casino.”
His father’s eyebrow rose. “So?”
Zane scowled. “You know I don’t think that casino should be built in Cedar Falls.”
“I’m not sure why you think the casino is a bad thing. In case you haven’t looked around Main Street lately, Cedar Falls is dying.” His dad stopped washing the dishes and turned to look at Zane. “That casino is the last hope this town has.”
“But what about the crime and corruption?” Zane’s voice became a whisper. “What about the mob?”
His father blinked at him. “Seriously? You think the mob is running the casino? You think the mob is interested in Cedar Falls, North Carolina?”
Zane frowned when his father started laughing. When that laughter grew with tears running down his father’s face, Zane found himself stomping his foot in true Jesse fashion. “It’s not funny. I watched Vegas. That show was based on what happened when the mob started all those casinos in Las Vegas.”
That only made his father laugh harder. The man’s face was getting so red, Zane was afraid he might have a heart attack.
Finally, his father got enough control to say, “Look, son, this isn’t like the sixties, nor is Cedar Falls about to become the next Las Vegas. If you like this man, I suggest you give him a chance.”
Zane put the leftovers away in the refrigerator, picked up a towel, and started drying the dishes his father had washed as he thought about what the man had said. “What if I fall for him and he leaves as soon as the casino is built?”
He heard his father sigh. “I don’t deny that would be hard. But what if he stays?”
Zane’s mouth opened to argue, but for once he was speechless as his father’s words sank in. A freshly washed casserole dish was handed to him. Zane dried it and put it in the cupboard.
When they were done and the counters wiped down, his father turned to him. “Trusting someone with our feelings is tough, but it’s also worth it when you finally find the one.”
That was the thing, how did he know if Aidan was the one? “What if he isn’t?”
His father gave him a crooked smile. “As much as I wish there was a crystal ball for you to see into the future, there isn’t. I can guarantee you’ll never find the person right for you, if you don’t at least try.”
Damn, he hated it when his parents gave him such good advice.
“What about mom?” Zane asked
“What about me, honey?” his mom said as she entered the kitchen with Jesse and Ethan right behind her. She went to the oven and pulled out one of the reasons Zane fell in love with baking to begin with, an ooey gooey Dutch apple pie. It had been one of his all-time favorites growing up.
“I know the doctor gave you
the all clear, but how have you been feeling?” Zane asked her bluntly. He might be their child, but despite his running from Aidan, Zane was an adult. Like it or not, his parents were getting older. Although they were only in their early sixties, his mom getting cancer woke him up to the fact that they weren’t going to be around forever.
It was time for him to take a more active role in their lives instead of it always being about him.
His mom handed Jesse the pie to put on the table with a warning. “No sticking your finger in it again,” she told him sternly. “It just came out of the oven and you don’t need to end up burning your finger.”
“Again,” Zane’s dad added with a laugh.
Jesse stuck his tongue out at Zane’s dad. “Believe it or not, I learned my lesson the last time,” he claimed indignantly.
Then he turned away with a flounce only Jesse could have managed and headed for the kitchen table. Zane reached above his mom for the dessert plates in the cupboard, while she pulled out a knife and some forks.
“I’ll get the ice cream,” Zane’s dad told them as he headed for the fridge.
When it was all on the table, his mom turned to Zane and put her arms around him for one of her special hugs that had a way of making all the cares of the world melt away. “I promise you, honey, I’m fine. I’m still a bit tired at times, but then again, I’m getting older,” she said with a laugh.
He glanced at the scarf she still wore on her head to hide the fact that her hair was still growing in. “I would have thought your hair would be long enough to go without the scarf by now.”
Even though she’d only just received the news that the first tests showed no cancer and she’d have to go back in a few more months to repeat the tests, she had stopped chemo months ago. Plenty of time for her hair to grow back, especially since she’d always had short hair.
Pink crept up her neck and into her face as his mom glanced over at her husband. Dad grinned and said, “I think you should show them.”
“Show us what?” Jesse said as he bounced in his chair staring really hard at the apple pie. The look in his eyes said he was about to do something stupid, despite his promise not to.
And before Zane could remind Jesse of the repercussions, his friend grabbed a fork, stuck it into the edge of the pie and quickly put it in his mouth. His eyes went wide and his hand went to his mouth as he tried to figure out if he should spit the way too hot bite out, or try to swallow it.
Zane rushed to his side, grabbed his plate and put it under Jesse’s mouth. “Spit,” he ordered.
Jesse did, then jumped up and went to the sink. He turned on the cold water and bent over to drink right from faucet.
“I thought you said you learned your lesson?” Zane’s father said with a chuckle.
Jesse lifted his head for a moment, nodding vigorously. “I did. I used a fork instead of my finger,” he exclaimed. “How was I supposed to know I was going to burn…” but he didn’t get any more out as the heat got to him and he once more dunked his head down to drink the cold water.
“I swear,” Zane’s dad teased. “You’re the reason they invented warning labels.”
Still drinking as much water as he could and getting himself soaked while doing it, Jesse flipped Zane’s dad off.
But Zane had only barely noticed the exchange as his mom took off her scarf. Zane blinked, and he was sure his jaw was on the floor but he couldn’t be certain, since he was in such a state of shock.
“Your hair,” he exclaimed. He reached out to touch it, but at the last minute pulled back as if afraid it might bite him. He knew he was overreacting, but this was the last thing he ever expected from his own mother.
“Cora,” Ethan exclaimed. “It’s gorgeous.” Ethan raced around the table to where Zane’s mom still waited for him to say something. Thankfully, Ethan didn’t have any problems as he oohed and aahed over it.
Jesse’s squeal of delight penetrated Zane’s brain enough for him to really look at his mom, lilac hair and all. Even though she was nervous about his response, it was obvious she was happy with the color as she turned this way and that for both Jesse and Ethan.
But then she once more looked at Zane. “What do you think, honey?”
Smiling, he told her the truth. “I love it. It really shows off your personality.”
And it did. The softer shade told anyone who bothered to get to know his mom how kindhearted she was. While the fact that she’d felt the need to change the color to something more unusual told the world she was ready to live life again. Or Zane hoped that’s what she was trying to do.
“I think you’ll be the hit of Cedar Falls,” he told her. And if anyone dared to give her shit, Zane, Jesse, and Ethan would stand up and fight for her. She’d done that for him his whole life, adding Jesse and Ethan into the mix when they’d become roommates.
Each of them would gladly give anyone hell who tried to pick on Cora Fisher.
CHAPTER 13
Oddly, helping Parker solidified what Aidan wanted for his own life. Zane. He wasn’t sure why he fixated on the man, but he wasn’t about to deny the attraction. Nor was he willing to play games. Life was too fucking short.
Tuesday morning, he pulled up to the bakery, his hands shaking. Just because he’d decided he wanted Zane didn’t mean Zane would want Aidan. He just knew he had to try one more time. If Zane didn’t want anything to do with him, at least Aidan had tried. Rejection would hurt, but he would accept it, knowing he’d done everything he could.
He just needed to make a quick trip across the street to Jesse’s flower shop to pick up the flowers he’d ordered. Aidan opened the door to Nice ’N Rosy and found Jesse sitting on the stool behind the counter with red, puffy eyes. Most concerning was the fact that he was dressed in a plain T-shirt and sweatpants and not a trace of makeup.
“Hey, Jesse. Are the flowers I ordered ready?” Aidan knew it was bad form not to ask what was wrong, but he was afraid Jesse would ask pointed questions about Parker that Aidan didn’t feel comfortable talking about.
Jesse glared at Aidan. “I’m not helping you beg Zane for forgiveness.”
Aidan stood there not sure what to do. “Does that mean the flowers aren’t ready?” He didn’t necessarily need them, but he’d thought it would be a nice gesture.
A man Aidan had never met walked out from the back. “They’re ready. Jesse, stop being a bitch.”
Jesse didn’t say anything in return as the man pulled out a beautiful arrangement of oranges, deep purples, and browns.
“Those are amazing. Thank you.” Now he knew Zane would agree to see him if only to get his flowers. They were absolutely breathtaking.
After paying the other man, who introduced himself as Ethan, Aidan turned to leave but Jesse grabbed his arm before he could. “Don’t you hurt him again.”
The warning was clear even if Aidan hadn’t actually done anything wrong. Still, he appreciated Jesse wanting to look out for his friend. Aidan hated not telling the suffering man what was going on. Because it wasn’t his story to tell, he chose to set Jesse straight on what happened at the pub. “Just so you know, Parker and I are friends, only friends. What you saw, us going out to dinner, was just friends meeting for dinner.”
The smallest sliver of hope crossed Jesse’s features, but the man slammed the emotion down. Aidan only hoped Parker made up his mind soon before he lost any chance with Jesse. It may be a difficult decision, but Aidan didn’t have any doubt Parker would end up picking Jesse.
With a mental shake to clear his mind, Aidan went across the street to Sweet Buns. He didn’t miss Zane watching him through the window or how he ran into the back just before Aidan opened the door.
Kevin greeted him when he walked in. Aidan only gave the man a nod before striding straight into the back. Kevin tried to protest, but Aidan wasn’t about to be put off.
Zane stood facing the door while pretending to wash down an already spotless counter. “You can’t come back here.” His words were ass
ertive, but his tone said he hadn’t meant them.
Aidan hadn’t really had a plan when he walked in there except to force Zane to at least hear him out. No matter how many times he went over what he wanted to say, the right words had escaped him. Now he knew without a doubt why. Words weren’t necessary.
He laid the flowers on the counter and strode around it to where Zane stood. He lifted a hand up until his knuckles were under Zane’s chin and forced the beautiful man to look at him. Desire instantly flared as their gazes locked.
Lowering his head until he was a breath away from Zane’s lips, he whispered, “I should have done this long ago.”
Aidan closed the distance. The moan from Zane as their lips touched was all the acceptance he needed to deepen the kiss. Aidan nipped and licked every inch of those lush lips until they parted under the onslaught. He thrust his tongue into wet heat, loving the way Zane opened his mouth even farther. He slid the hand he’d used to tilt Zane’s chin along his jaw to the back of his neck. Aidan wrapped his other hand around Zane’s waist and pulled the man flush with him.
The way Zane’s strong body fit against Aidan’s pushed his desire higher. All those lean muscles against his own were an aphrodisiac all on their own. He moved his hand from Zane’s waist to that perfectly shaped ass. He groaned at the feel of those tight muscles responding to his touch. His hard cock rubbed against Zane’s ridged stomach — if he had to guess, the man had a six pack — giving Aidan just the right amount of friction. He could feel Zane’s bulge rubbing against his hip.
As much as he wanted nothing more than to continue, he pulled back. A sweet little moan of dismay fell from those kiss-swollen lips. Aidan smiled. Blue eyes filled with passion stared up at him. Aidan nearly changed his mind and continued their kiss, but the need to get things settled between them was more important.
“We need to talk.”
Zane stiffened in his arms. “So talk.”
The flip tone pissed Aidan off, especially when Zane tried to push away from him. Aidan slammed his lips against Zane’s until they were both fighting for air. This time when he pulled back he said, “I understand that you’re afraid of being hurt, but don’t treat what we have together as if it means nothing to you, because we both know that’s a lie.”
