Love Song: A friends-to-lovers rock & roll romantic suspense
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When Sam made it home twenty minutes later, he quickly bounded up the back stairs into the kitchen. John and GG were sitting at the table coloring and greeted him with big smiles on their faces. In that moment, he knew Casey hadn’t told GG the devastating news. Kissing the top of her head, he paused when he noticed her colorful picture.
“What are you drawing?” he asked.
She looked up at him, pure innocence emulating from her face. “It’s me and Cee-Cee and you. I wanted to draw Bleu, but there isn’t a brown crayon in the box. John said I should use le-low.”
His heart surged with love when she said the word “le-low.” He couldn’t help it that he’d fallen in love with this little girl so quickly. No matter how emotional it was about to get, he knew in his heart he was in this for the long haul.
“Lookie what John gave me!” She held up a small, wooden horse with pride.
“That’s great G.” Sam kissed her on the head again and glanced at John who gave him a knowing look. “I’ll be right back.”
With a big bottle of water in his hand, he trudged up the stairs to confront Casey and wasn’t prepared for what he saw in the bedroom. She lay in the fetal position on the floor by the bed, huddled under a blanket. The black boot had been cast aside, and an empty bottle of liquor was laying sideways near her head. Sam sat on the edge of the bed and held his head in his hands, tears pooling in his eyes.
“I shouldn’t have left you, darlin’,” he whispered in anguish. He slid down the edge of the bed and sat on the floor beside her, gently lifting her head to be in his lap. As he swept her hair out of her face, she mumbled something incoherent. He sat there for several minutes, his mind reeling in the quiet room before he decided to wake her.
“Casey, wake up. We need to talk,” he whispered into her ear.
She moaned and barely moved.
“Casey,” he said louder. “Wake up darlin’. We need to have a conversation.” He lifted her by the shoulders making her sit up. Her head wobbled uneasily as she tried to focus on his face. When she recognized him, she offered him a wide smile.
“Hey Sammy,” she slurred. “I missed you so much.” She flung her arms around his neck and gave him a relaxed hug as he held her wrists and peeled her off.
“Come on Casey. Just sit up for me, okay? I brought you some water. You need to drink it.” He grabbed the bottle and took the cap off, holding it in front of her lips to drink. She took a small sip and wrinkled her nose, pushing it away from her face. When she paused to look at him, her gaze seemed distant and sad. He didn’t know where the hell she was or how he was going to get her back. When he felt a small tug in his groin, he looked down to see her clutching his crotch.
“I want you. You’re my handsome boyfriend,” she murmured huskily, stroking the outside of his pants.
Sam inhaled sharply and forcefully removed her hand. “No, Casey. You need to sober up so we can talk about what you did today.”
Teetering precariously, she managed to sit up. “You don’t want me?” she pouted.
“Yes. Of course I want you. Not now, Casey. Do you realize what you’ve done? You left GG outside in the cold with no shoes and socks on. What do you think you’re doing holing up in the bedroom getting shitfaced?”
Casey looked at the floor forlornly for a beat before she flung the blanket off revealing her scantily clothed body and started to stand as if forgetting she’d been injured. Before Sam could stop her, she cried out in pain when she put weight on her injured foot, collapsing in his arms.
“You don’t have the boot on Casey!” he exclaimed. With a grunt, he hoisted her over his shoulder and carried her into the bathroom, kicking open the shower door. After setting her on the tiled floor, he turned the water on full blast, startling her.
“Wha…what are you doing?” she screamed. The water completely doused her making her rigid from the sudden deluge.
Sam quickly threw his shoes to the side and peeled off his shirt, getting into the stall with her. He held her as she flailed, not letting her get away.
“Look at me Casey,” he yelled. She turned her head away, struggling to get out of his grip. “I said, look at me dammit!” He grabbed her by the chin forcing her to look in his eyes, water cascading down their heads. Her tense body became limp as she relented and started to cry.
“I shouldn’t have left you,” he agonized, pushing her soaking wet hair away from her beautiful face. “I’m never going to do that again. Do you hear me? I love you Casey, and I’m never going to leave you.”
Sobbing in his arms, she clung to him, nodding her head. She mumbled “I’m sorry” over and over into his ear. The water continued to rain down on them as he kissed her forehead and cheeks countless times. When she pulled back to look at him, water droplets clung to her lashes as she told him she loved him. He pressed his forehead against hers. “I love you too, darlin’.”
***
Casey sat on the window seat, staring out at the red barn. Her hair was wet and slicked back from the impromptu shower and the black boot was back on her ankle. She sipped slowly from a water bottle, aware of a throbbing headache coming on, which was her own damn fault.
Sam helped her clean up and sober up enough for her to face her biggest fear—telling Gwyneth her mother was dead. He was bringing her upstairs any second so they could tell her, together. She was grateful and knew she was undeserving of his love and patience. Her latest actions were proof positive she didn’t know what the hell she was doing with her life. No wonder Laura always worried about her…. She needed to grow up and to be responsible. She needed to stop drinking once and for all. She owed that much to her sister.
Hearing footsteps coming up the steps, Casey’s heart accelerated. The door opened and GG came bounding in like a breath of fresh air.
“Cee-Cee! Look what John gave me. It’s a horsie!” She climbed into Casey’s lap holding the wooden animal in front of her face.
“Wow! That was so nice of him. Did you say ‘thank you’ like a good girl?”
“Yes.”
Sam sat next to them on the large window seat and offered Casey a small smile. His blue eyes were bright with hope as if he truly believed she could go through with this.
“Sweet girl, I need to talk to you.”
GG was distracted and noticed Casey’s hair slicked back. “Why is your hair all wet? You look funny. Did you take a bath or go swimming?” She giggled.
“Ha-ha cheeky girl. I took a shower. I just didn’t dry my hair.”
As if he knew she was struggling, Sam took over and placed his large hand on GG’s small thigh. “Gwyneth? Please sit still and listen to Casey. She needs to talk to you about something very important.” The tone of his voice made GG’s eyes widen. She obediently settled down and brought her thumb nervously up to her mouth.
With trembling hands, Casey stroked her cheek. The throbbing headache started to feel more like a migraine with every second. She took a deep breath.
“GG, something happened that you need to know about. Something bad.”
Gwyneth’s eyes darted to Sam and then back to Casey. “What?” she asked with her thumb halfway in her mouth, muffling her speech.
Casey didn’t know how to tell her so she just blurted it out. “Your mama died.”
Everything stood still and Casey held her breath. Sam rubbed her leg reassuringly as they both waited for GG’s reaction. She continued to suck her thumb with her little brow furrowed as if processing this news.
“How did she die?” she asked innocently.
Casey looked at Sam and shrugged, not sure what to tell her.
Sam gently took GG’s small hand and placed it on his chest. “Sweetheart, do you know what’s in here?” She shook her head. “Your heart is in here. Your heart thumps like a drumbeat. ‘ba-boom… ba-boom… Your mama’s heart stopped beating. Her body was broken.”
Tears started to run down Casey’s face and she bit her lip, thankful for Sam’s explanation. She wished her niece under
stood what they were telling her, but she was so, so young. Picking up her little hand, she kissed it softly. “She’s gone now, but I’m here and Sam is here,” she managed to say.
GG looked up and noticed her tears. “Why are you crying?” she whispered.
“I’m sad. It’s okay to be sad, GG. Your mama was my big sister and I’m going to miss her very much.”
Sam continued to rub his hand back and forth across her thigh as GG pulled her hand out of Casey’s grasp and somberly fingered the wooden horse in her lap with her eyes downcast. Several seconds passed, which seemed like an eternity.
“What are you thinking about G?” Sam asked delicately.
Her little lip jutted out and trembled. “I want my mama,” she whimpered quietly before she hid her face in Casey’s chest and broke down. Sam wrapped his arms around them both, all their tears flowing in unison in a sad love song dedicated to a sister, a friend… a mama.
Chapter Twenty-Two
The funeral for Laura happened several days later on a crisp Saturday afternoon at a small funeral home near the elementary school where she’d worked. Beth Roberts was instrumental in getting the word out to all of Laura’s teacher friends and neighbors, leaving the southern funeral parlor standing room only. Casey recalled a conversation she and her sister had about death the year their parents died. They talked about how they wanted to be remembered, which helped her with some of the planning. She’d joked with Laura about how she wanted to be buried in a glass coffin like Snow White and have a New Orleans jazz funeral complete with somber dirges and hymns in a parade to the cemetery. Once she was buried, the music would become more upbeat to celebrate her loud, raucous, rock ‘n roll life, concluding with the famous song, “When the Saints Go Marching In” while everyone danced. Casey remembered her sister’s facial expressions and how she laughed out loud telling her how ridiculous she was. With some coercing, Laura told Casey she wanted her “celebration of life” to be something simple and that she wanted to be cremated so as not to leave a large footprint on Mother Earth. She also admitted her love for sunflowers…
Several teachers spoke at Laura’s celebration. They all agreed she was perhaps the most beloved teacher at the school among the administration and the students. Casey fought back tears listening to story after story about Laura’s big heart and her love for children. Gwyneth sat on John Duke’s lap next to her, twirling a large sunflower in her hands, innocently listening, while Sam sat on the other side, his hand clasped with hers. Sam’s sister, brother-in-law and his nephew, Dylan, were also in attendance sitting behind them. Casey hoped that someday, GG would understand how much this community truly loved her mother.
Casey cried several times throughout the speeches, and Gwyneth handed her tissues from a small pack Sam had put in his suit pocket. Scanning all the gorgeous flowers arranged at the front of the room, surrounding a larger-than-life photo of Laura in happier times, she was grateful for the outward displays of love. Her friend and bandmate, Dora, sent a beautiful white lily arrangement with her condolences, sincerely apologetic she couldn’t make the flight to Atlanta last minute. Her Latino friend called her several times to check in on her and to let her know she couldn’t be there because she’d already started rehearsals in a new Broadway musical. Casey was so proud of her and told her, “the show must go on,” deeply touched by her thoughtful gesture.
When the final eulogy was uttered, Casey limped the short distance to the front of the small parlor and sang, “Amazing Grace” accompanied by her bandmate and keyboard player, Rocky. She struggled with each note at first, her vibrato quivering with emotion, but was calmed by Sam’s blue eyes radiating love as he held GG’s small hand. Using a cane to walk out on her own during the processional with Sam and GG by her side, her limp was pronounced with the large black boot on her leg—a reminder to everyone in the room the trauma she had endured. Sam carried Gwyneth, who buried her little face in his shoulder clutching the limp sunflower with both hands around his neck as Rocky concluded the service playing a beautiful George Winston melody. In the bright sunshine, Sam pulled Casey into his other arm and the three of them hugged for several minutes.
The rest of the day was a blur. Beth opened her home to everyone for a reception, platters of food and deep dish casseroles filling the kitchen counters and dining room table with a bounty of home-cooked recipes. Casey sat in an armchair and barely picked at a plate Sam assembled for her. GG was thrilled to be with Beth’s daughter, Chloe, again, the two little girls darting in and out of grown-up legs stealing homemade cookies and cupcakes off crystal platters and giggling as they ate them sitting cross-legged under the kitchen table. They started to play an impromptu game of hide and seek with Dylan but were quickly scolded by several teachers, suggesting they take it outside. Casey finally had a chance to sit with Lisa and Craig who were more than gracious in offering their sincerest sympathy for the loss of her sister. During the mundane chatter, it was decided they would all meet and sit together in a couple of weeks at the upcoming homecoming game where Sam would lead the marching band he’d been working with for several months.
“Dude, that was amazing,” Rocky praised as he bent over to hug Casey. Her band mate wore a pin-striped suit and his dark hair was slicked back into a ponytail. For a moment, she briefly thought he looked like a mobster, and offered him a slight smile.
“Thank you for your gift of music, Rocky. It was really beautiful.”
He pursed his lips and nodded. “Thanks. I’m really, really sorry about your sister.” He shoved his hands deep into his pockets. “So, when are you gonna get outta that boot?” he asked, changing the subject. “Are you still in pain?”
His concern warmed her heart. “I have another month and some physical therapy to endure. I’ve been feeling pretty good physically lately. The cane helps.”
Sam approached and put his arm on Rocky’s shoulder. “Wow, Rocky… amazing playing. Thanks so much for being here.” The two of them hugged quickly, patting each other aggressively on the backs. “Did you get some food? There’s plenty.”
“Oh, yeah. I’m about to consume mass quantities.” He patted his belly he purposefully stuck out making Casey laugh. “Do you need anything Casey-girl?” he asked genuinely.
“No. I’m good,” she replied half-heartedly. She and Sam watched him maneuver his way into the crowded dining room to fill a plate.
Sam knelt in front of her with his hand on her knee. “How are you really holding up?” he asked softly.
As she looked into his eyes, she wanted desperately to get lost in the ocean of blue staring back at her. “I’m okay.”
“Do you need anything? You barely touched your food, sweetheart.”
She shook her head looking down at her fingers she was absent-mindedly tugging on. After all he’d helped her with that week, she didn’t have the heart to tell him she just wanted to go back to his farm and crawl under the covers to sleep for the rest of her life. He continued to kneel in front of her.
“Beth has offered to keep GG overnight. She thinks it might be a good idea for you to get some rest and not have to worry about her. I have to agree, but it’s up to you.”
Casey sighed. She was unaccustomed to the outpouring of love and concern, unsure how to respond. “If you think she’ll be okay, then I’m good with it,” she managed to reply.
He grinned and squeezed her thigh before he stood up. “I’ll go let her know.” She watched as he spoke and hugged random people on his way to Beth who was standing near the doorway.
Casey was bothered GG seemed oblivious to what was going on, hardly displaying any kind of emotion while knowing her mother had died. Watching her play and laugh as if nothing happened was painful. When would she ever laugh again? Closing her eyes, she wished she could escape, the effort of putting on a brave face in front of mostly strangers, exhausting. A wave of guilt washed over her when her thoughts shifted to a stiff drink to take the edge off. GG startled her, climbing eagerly into her lap.
/> “Cee-Cee! Chloe said I can spend the night! Can I? Please? Can I?”
Casey pulled her in for a tight squeeze inhaling her sugary scent. “Yes, ma’am, as long as you wash your hands and brush your teeth before bedtime.”
“I will.” The little girl kissed her cheek and wiggled out of her lap excitedly. Casey watched her wistfully, wondering again if the news would ever truly sink in that her mother was gone.
An hour later, leaning heavily on her cane by the open door, Casey thanked the last of the guests for coming. She offered a couple of her bandmates lingering hugs and managed to slip a hundred-dollar bill into Rocky’s hands before he left, much to his displeasure. Even though he told her his music was a gift to her family, Casey insisted that as a full-time musician, he take her token of appreciation which he finally did, begrudgingly.
Dylan hugged her tightly around the waist and looked up at her. “I’m really sorry about what happened,” he expressed. He looked adorable in his miniature suit and tie.
Tussling his blond hair, a maternal instinct washed over her. “Thank you. I’m grateful to you for taking such good care of GG that day. You’re a real hero in my eyes, Dylan.”
His smile was bashful as his parents looked on with pride. She hugged Lisa and Craig who reminded her of their plans at the big homecoming game.
After the last guest left, she held Beth in her arms and they both cried again before saying goodbye for the evening. Sam carried a large box of packed up food to his truck Beth insisted they take home and freeze. She reminded Casey about the times Laura joked about how bad of a cook they all knew she was and didn’t want GG and Sam to suffer. The few nostalgic laughs seemed to alleviated the dark cloud in the room.