A Love Hate Thing

by Whitney D. Grandison

  But Dr. Mancini didn’t seem to mind.

  He greeted us both with a smile. “Hey, kids.”

  Shayne sat up. “Daddy! You’re home.”

  “Yeah, just for a bit.” In true Dr. Mancini fashion, he was scrolling through his cell phone. It didn’t take long to learn that once his phone came out he was no longer in our universe.

  “I was thinking maybe we could go sailing this weekend,” Shayne suggested.

  “Uh-huh.” He put on his glasses to glance at something on his phone.

  I watched as Shayne’s eyes slit. “I read that book I said I was going to read. I even wrote the report for you.”

  “Sounds good, honey.”

  Her nostrils flared. “I had sex with Ty in the pool, total raw dog.”

  “Glad to hear you’re having fun.”

  She threw her hands up as her pretty face twisted in anger and sadness. “You’re canceling tonight, aren’t you?”

  Somehow these were the words that registered to Dr. Mancini as he finally faced his daughter. “Oh, I’m sorry. I’m on call all weekend. You know how that is.”

  Shayne let out a breath and I knew she was crushed.

  I wrapped my arms around her from behind, holding her and feeling her relax into me. I knew she was still upset, but I could sense her fight was over.

  “I’ll have dinner with you,” I said.

  In front of me, Shayne bowed her head as she simply nodded. Dr. Mancini smiled at the rescue and mouthed a thank you before going back inside.

  Moments passed, and I attempted to massage Shayne’s shoulders, but she kept silent, looking off into the distance. On the outside, this seemed pretty regular for them. Dr. Mancini canceled on her a lot, and she would always find something else to do to avoid doing anything with her stepmother, who seemed heavily medicated most days. Shayne’s mother was reportedly in rehab.

  I guess it was true, what they said. The prettiest people sometimes had the ugliest lives.

  “How was summer school, Trice?” Shayne asked.

  “Lydia wants me to write about my life in Lindenwood.”

  “Maybe you should.”

  Maybe I would. It would give me something to do. But that wasn’t the entire issue. Once I filled the book with my tale, then what?

  Shayne’s silence called to me.

  “Something wrong?” I asked.

  “Do you ever just wish you could go back and change your life?”

  “You have no idea.”

  “I just wish... I just wish my mom could be here and my dad... They wouldn’t even have to be together...” Shayne stopped to think. “No, they would. I just wish they were together and it was all fine, you know?”

  I nodded.

  “What are your parents like?”

  I was surprisingly relieved to know that Nandy hadn’t told anyone about my situation. “They’re dead.”

  Shayne turned around, reaching out and rubbing my arm. “I’m sorry. Can I ask how?”

  I felt numb. “My dad killed my mother, shot me, and killed himself.”

  Shayne read me right, because she didn’t offer any more affection than squeezing my shoulder and frowning. “I hope it gets easier here, Trice.”

  Maybe it would.

  “Your dad has good intentions. He just sucks at showing it,” I said.

  “I don’t want him to have good intentions. I want him to be my dad.”

  At the Smiths’, both Parker and Max worked long hours during the week, and even then they’d come home and check on all of us. With Dr. Mancini, it seemed as though he expected Shayne to be okay with taking care of herself.

  It had to be tough on her. He was tangibly the only parent she had left.

  I didn’t want to talk about our parents, not when it was a trigger to upset the both of us.

  “Can I ask you something?” I asked.

  “What?”

  “Last night, with Nandy, what’d you guys do?”

  “We watched TV and did our nails.” Shayne held out her hand and wiggled her fingers. “I did cobalt blue, you like?”

  The color did complement her. “Yeah. About Nandy—has she said anything to you, about me?”

  Shayne appeared thoughtful. “No, not really. Why?”

  I wasn’t about to whine about Nandy’s mistreating me, but I did want a hint as to what I’d done to deserve it. “No reason.”

  Shayne gathered her phone and sent a text. “I wonder what she’s up to.”

  “Probably at the beach kicking sand in kids’ eyes.”

  Shayne snuck me a disapproving look as she smiled.

  Her phone pinged and she read her text. “She’s at Mrs. Stone’s helping bake cupcakes for some charity drive. We should go. Mrs. Stone always lets volunteers keep a dozen for themselves.”

  While I wasn’t in the mood to bake, the opportunity to seize the day and talk to Nandy had presented itself, and I knew I had no choice.

  Standing, I gathered my keys. “Let’s go.”

  22 | Nandy

  Leave it to my mother to volunteer to help Mrs. Stone bake cupcakes for charity and then drop out due to work. No, leave it to my mother to do all that, and then force me to fill in for her. Honestly, I hadn’t been doing anything, so I didn’t mind going and spending my Tuesday afternoon packing and labeling cupcakes with a ninety-year-old woman who scolded any girl who dared to show an ankle or their midriff.

  It was for a good cause, as the proceeds were going to the nearest children’s hospital, and it got me out of the house. Not to mention as I bumped into Kyle Frogge, it gave me an opportunity to get to know the quiet guy from down the street.

  In a room full of girls and older women, he was the only guy who had shown up to volunteer. Mrs. Stone was using this to her advantage and had him carrying boxes of baked goods to her Suburban for each trip she took to the venue to set up.

  I caught Kyle alone across the dining room labeling cupcakes, so I made my way over to him. “Hey, Kyle.”

  He appraised me for a second before responding. “Hi, Nandy.”

  Kyle seemed surprised that I’d approached him. His slight suspicion made me laugh and nudge him. “What’s up?”

  Kyle shrugged and labeled a pack of coconut iced cupcakes. “Oh, you know, not much. You?”

  “Same. My mom got caught up at the office and volunteered me to take her place,” I said. I leaned back against the table, eyeing the boy beside me. “So, what are you into and what do you like?”

  Kyle perked a brow. “Really?”

  “Yeah, I feel like I don’t talk to you enough.”

  “We’ve been neighbors since we were nine, and I think we’ve had all of three conversations our whole lives.”

  “So, let’s change that. Tonight’s battle of the sexes. You should totally join in. It’s cotillion tradition.”

  Kyle frowned. “Chad and his friends aren’t really my scene.”

  I couldn’t blame him there. I think it was loyalty and sports that linked Chad in with the likes of Oliver and Dickie. But I wanted Kyle to belong, and not sit home alone while most of us were having a good time at the beach later.

  “You can miss Star Wars for one night,” I teased.

  Kyle deadpanned, “It’s Star Trek actually. Big difference.”

  “Really? Is that the one with the hand thingy?”

  He snorted at my attempt to do the symbol as he bobbed his head, peeking at me from beneath his shaggy dark hair. “They just both happen in space. Star Trek is more about exploring the galaxy than a war. A few guys at school formed a club I’m a part of. We mostly watch reruns and shoot the shit, but it gets me out of the house twice a week.”

  It sounded nerdy but adorable. “I’ll have to check it out once school starts. Hey, maybe I could talk to Shayne about joining.”
<
br />   Kyle’s face lit up with the biggest grin. “R-really?”

  “Yeah, it wouldn’t hurt to try new things.”

  Kyle held up his arm between us. “Pinch me, because I have to be dreaming.”

  I pushed his arm away and laughed. “Oh come on, I’m for real. You know, you’re really cool now that I’ve gotten to know you better, and maybe you could school us on Star Trek.”

  Kyle’s smile disintegrated. “Okay, now I know I am dreaming. Any minute you’re going to morph into Uhura and I’m going to be Spock.”

  I felt my brows furrow at the reference. I sorta got it. Chad had dragged me to see some remake of the iconic science fiction show in theaters. “Why wouldn’t you be the captain guy?”

  Kyle made a face as he gestured to himself. “I’m not exactly the leading man.”

  Kyle wasn’t the quintessential beefy lead in an action movie, true, but he was cute in his own way. Like Joseph Gordon-Levitt cute. Plus, his wit was endearing, and I found his interest in space and science fiction unique.

  I patted his chest. “You just need confidence. Girls love confident guys.”

  “Kyle!” Mrs. Stone called from the doorway.

  He faced me. “I’ll consider tonight.”

  Because I was actually thinking about checking out his club, I asked, “Hey, Kyle, about the club, you guys don’t dress up or anything, do you?”

  Kyle backed away, looking around as he clasped his hands together. “I will have to talk to Brady about that.”

  I stifled a laugh as I heard my phone sound out of my pocket.

  A picture message came in on my phone, and I looked down to see it was from Shayne. It was a photo of her in a bikini top leaning back into Tyson blowing a kiss. The caption read: On our way :)

  A selfish sickness lined my stomach, and I set my phone facedown.

  She was doing that a lot lately, using pronouns like we and ours. I hated that I noticed and cared.

  Most of all, I hated that I couldn’t control it. It started as a tick and turned into a full-blown itch that wouldn’t go away.

  There was a little Nandy inside of me that would jump up and down whenever Shayne spoke of Tyson, going mine, mine, mine! The more Little Nandy jumped and shouted, the more I caught myself almost letting the words spill from my lips.

  Chad materialized out of nowhere, causing me to jump and almost drop the pack of cupcakes in my hand.

  He chuckled as he reached out and caught them before they could hit the floor. “Nervous?”

  “Oh, hey.” I accepted the pack of cupcakes. Seeing they were peanut-butter-and-jelly flavored, I grabbed the roll of labels that accompanied the flavor and quickly made them ready for sale.

  “‘Oh, hey’? Geez, it’s great to see you too, Nan,” Chad said as he attempted to help. “Even if it has been practically forever.”

  “What’s wrong, Chad?” I let out a sigh as I put down my labels.

  His brows furrowed as he did the same, facing me with his full attention. “Um, how about the fact that I barely get to see you? You’re always busy with the girls or helping out at stuff like this. We barely have any time together.”

  “You know I’ve been busy getting ready for cotillion.”

  Chad rolled his eyes. “You know what I mean.”

  “Is this about sex again?” It was my turn to roll my eyes and get back to work. He’d complained before about our not having hooked up at all that summer, and really, I just wasn’t in the mood to argue over it. It felt like I was getting a migraine from it all, Chad and his complaining, and then that stupid text.

  Chad scoffed. “Yeah, that’s exactly what this is about.”

  “You’ll get your rocks off whenever I have enough free time on my hands to blink.”

  “This is not about that,” he snapped. “This is about you and the space that’s been wedged between us. I seriously doubt you have to spend every waking second with the girls, talking about dresses, hair, and makeup. Or out doing things like this.”

  “Like this?” I repeated. “We’re helping out a good cause, Chad!”

  Doing things like this was what I enjoyed—helping people in need because I was more fortunate than others.

  Maybe I didn’t have to spend as much time away from him as I did. As awful as it sounded, being at Mrs. Stone’s helping out was exactly where I would’ve rather been than with him at the moment. It all fed into that selfish part of me that I was losing control over.

  “That’s not what I meant,” Chad said.

  “It’s almost over,” I said finally, as I thought of cotillion.

  Chad grimaced and his shoulders sagged. “Did you tell him about tonight?”

  I managed to lighten up. “Not that I talk to Tyson, but telling him wouldn’t do me any good, now, would it?”

  Chad shifted moods, too. “I promise to be nice. I don’t think Catalano’s getting involved, so it should be easy.”

  “No offense, but I think Travis would make tonight a little bit more fun,” I admitted. “Think of the steps he’d take to win.”

  My boyfriend chuckled. “The guy’s a loose cannon.”

  “Some might say that excites a girl.”

  “True, but that lifestyle is bound to catch up with you.”

  And that was Chad—he always stayed in line and did as he was told. Once, the boys had been playing flag football with Travis, and when Travis had gone rogue and not passed the ball to Chad, and scored on his own, it had set Chad off.

  Travis didn’t live by rules or care what people thought, and people in our circle sorta did. Sure, we broke the law, drank underage, and partied, but we stayed mostly in line to appease our parents and to look good. Travis was fearless. And Tyson flocked to him.

  To think, here I was stressing and glorifying my debut as if it really mattered. I had to jump through hoops for these old ladies in town just to debut in an expensive dress and prove myself worthy.

  Looking at the likes of carefree Travis Catalano, I couldn’t help but wonder: worthy of what?

  “Do you ever think we worry too much about image and our parents, and what’s planned out for us?” I came out and asked.

  Chad appeared thoughtful, but then he shrugged. “Where’s this coming from?”

  I shook my head. “Nothing. I’m just talking crazy. Ignore me.”

  Chad stepped closer and kissed me, quick and chaste. “The guys were talking about hanging out at the beach after. You in?”

  It wasn’t like it was anything special—it was tradition after the events we had planned for the night.

  Still, I put on a smile. “Yeah. I invited Kyle Frogge, so be nice.”

  Chad wrinkled his nose. “That weird kid?”

  I shoved him. “He’s not weird.”

  “Sure, babe. Here comes controversy,” Chad mumbled as he looked across the room to where Shayne was entering with Tyson. She was holding his hand and leading him into the crowded room. The sickening thing was, they seemed to match, with their clothing color scheme of black and dark gray.

  I could see Mrs. Stone scowling at Shayne’s choice of a crop top and a high-waisted skirt with a slit in the side, exposing her from the thigh on down.

  Chad was staring at me. He looked down at a pack of cupcakes and fingered the messed-up label. “I guess I’ll see you later.”

  “Yeah, I’ll see you.”

  He left, and Erica and Edi came over, Erica studying me and then looking after Chad.

  “Trouble in paradise?” she quipped.

  “No, we’re fine,” I insisted. I focused on Edi’s hair, which was all ready for cotillion due to her recent trip to the salon and added extensions. “Nice locks.”

  She giggled as she ran her fingers through the tresses. “New hair has me feelin’ like Rapunzel and shit.”

  We laughed, an
d my mood lifted gradually.

  “Got that right. We can’t all have flawless hair like Erica over there,” I teased.

  Erica smirked and tilted her head, jiggling her curls. “Oh, this is just God and conditioner.”

  We all had long hair, but Erica’s was perfect. She could’ve gotten extensions, but really, she didn’t need any.

  Shayne came over, almost seeming to glide and glow.

  “Hey,” she said as she greeted us all.

  “How nice of you to show up when it’s basically over,” Erica said.

  Shayne waved her off. “We totally decided to come last minute. Now we’re in the mood for a burger run. You guys in?”

  The girls agreed.

  “I’m actually still full from my kale salad earlier,” I spoke up.

  “Ooh, the one with the yams, cranberries, and raisins?” Shayne asked.

  “Yeah.” As much as I wanted to pig out, I was forcing myself to eat healthy so that I could still fit into my dress.

  “Is there any left?”

  I nodded.

  “Save me some?” Shayne moved on to the girls and soon held up her phone. “Look what Ty got me.”

  It was a new case. One of the little mermaid, Ariel, sitting backward with a big blue bow in her hair. The emphasis was on her great head of hair for sure. I got the gist of the gift right away.

  “That’s so sweet,” Edi said as she examined the simple case. “Did you ask him to cotillion yet?”

  Shayne peered over at Tyson and smiled with a shrug. “Not yet. I’m thinking I’ll do it tonight after all the mayhem.”

  Tyson was talking with Kyle, oblivious to what was in store.

  Biting on my lip, I frowned at it all. “It’s so last minute, Shayne. He’s missed all the practices and wouldn’t know how to waltz.”

  My best friend stopped smiling. “So?”

  “So, what if he says no?”

  She narrowed her eyes. “Why would he say no?”

  I focused on labeling the last pack of cupcakes. “You don’t have to have an ego about it, I was just saying.”

  It got quiet, and I could feel the heat from their collective stares.