Beau's Redemption

by Royal Blue

  “That dress and the shoes please,” I tell her.

  Beau reaches in his pocket and pulls out his wallet. I glare at him and fold my arms over my chest. He knows good and damn well I promised Billy this was my treat. “What do you think you’re doing?”

  “I’m paying for her things,” he says.

  “No you’re not. We’re not getting into this one again. It was my offer. Put your wallet away.”

  “I wan—”

  “Beau, you’re here as a staff member from the home. This is something I’m doing for her,” I say.

  “Fine.”

  He frowns, but after side glancing my niece, he slips it back into his pocket. I shake my head and pull my wallet out to go pay. Billy comes to join me at the counter once again dressed in her worn jeans and T-shirt.

  I can’t help wondering why she’s in such worn-out clothes. I’ve noticed that the other orphanage kids tend to dress in nicer things. Not wanting to embarrass her, I bank the thought for later to ask Beau about.

  “Here you go, little miss,” the clerk says, handing Billy the dress bag.

  “Thank you,” she beams.

  “Your daughter is so polite and well mannered. You’re doing a great job,” the clerk says to me.

  I go to correct her, but the small hand that creeps into mine cuts the words off. I look down at Billy’s big brown eyes on me, a hopeful smile on her lips.

  “She’s a great kid,” I say instead.

  Beau

  “You did a great thing for her today,” I say as I climb back into the truck after dropping Billy and Aryanna off.

  “I’d do it again if I could,” he says. “Can I ask you something?”

  “Anytime.”

  “Billy doesn’t seem to dress as nicely as some of the other kids. Why is that?”

  I laugh and look him in the eyes. “You really don’t understand what took place today. Billy won’t take the clothes we try to give her. She wears what she came with.”

  “Wow,” he says, falling back in his seat.

  “She likes and trusts you.”

  “That’s… wow.”

  Kyle and Andy said the same thing when I told them about Billy accepting the dress. They were excited about her finding something for the wedding. Everyone knows how much Mason wants his little friend to join him.

  Angel sits with a thoughtful express on his handsome face. I lean over to kiss his temple before I start the car. Things have been going well. We’ve been taking things at our own pace and it feels right. “Are you coming over tonight?” I ask.

  “I don’t know. I’ve been keeping you up with my pacing.”

  “No you haven’t,” I reply. Yes, I’ve noticed that halfway through the night he wakes to pace outside. When I asked him about it, he said that it happens. I wonder if it happens as often when he’s alone at the gym.

  I’m sort of a light sleeper, but it doesn’t bother me when he gets up in the middle of the night. I usually fall right back to sleep. I’ve gotten used to it.

  “Yes, I have. You pop up every time I get up to go out and pace the balcony.”

  “Would it be better if I come stay with you?”

  “You would do that?” he asks.

  “Why not?”

  “You have that amazing apartment. Why would you want to sleep at the gym with me?”

  I reach over to place my hand on his thigh. I glance over to find him frowning. I give a light squeeze to his leg. “You’re my boyfriend, Angel. I want to spend the night with you,” I reply.

  A brief silence fills the car. I chance another look at him as I stop at a light. He has a small smile on his lips as he stares at me.

  “We can go to your place,” he says.

  I lean and kiss his nose quickly before the light turns. My own reasons for having him over are selfish. I haven’t been having the nightmares with him in my bed at night.

  I rethink my own selfishness and consider his needs. I do want him to stay the night with me but not at the expense of his own comfort. I purse my lips in frustration with myself. “You know, I shouldn’t have pressured you on this. If you feel you’ll get more sleep at your place…?” I say after thinking it through.

  “It’s a hit or miss thing. I can sleep peaceful for a week or two and then not at all for a month. I’m staying with my man tonight. It’s cool,” he says.

  That gorgeous smile is aimed at me when I peek at him, his dimples peeking out. I swallow hard when it hits me that I’m really in a relationship and I’m allowing my feelings to get involved.

  You know what? That’s a lie. I haven’t allowed anything. I just like to think I have. In truth, Angel has pushed his way in and claimed something I didn’t know I still owned.

  “I wanted to ask you something,” I say.

  “Shoot.”

  “Have you ever thought about having kids of your own?”

  “Yeah, I have. I come from a big family that comes from a big family. My moms would love nothing more than more grandchildren,” he replies.

  “So you can see them in your future?” I say. “I love Mason. When Kyle got custody of him, it made me think about having that someday, you know?”

  “Yeah, I hear you. I was there when Andres’s daughter was born. I swear it was one of those times when I felt like I could feel what my twin felt.

  “I want to know that feeling for myself. But knowing that I’m gay and broke as fuck, I never really invested a lot of time into when or how I’d make that happen. Now I have all kinds of things going on. I don’t know if that’s an option,” he murmurs.

  He’s looking down into his palms. His concerns have been my own. I want what Kyle and Andy have. The relationship, a kid. Heck, if I could have two or three, I’d be happy as a pig in shit.

  “I believe it will present itself at the right time. My mama always says when you tell the Universe your heart’s desire it fiddles with your life until you’re turned in the direction of your heart’s request,” I say.

  “Well, I guess I better start speaking up.” Angel gives a dry laugh.

  “You already have. Your heart speaks before your mouth. We live life being turned and not noticing it until we arrive,” I say.

  “Beau, are you being a philosopher on me?”

  “No, darlin’. I’m just a man with a wise mama.” I chuckle.

  Angel shifts and I can feel those eyes on me. I turn to him and see the wheels turning. I place my focus back to the road just as he speaks.

  “I want to meet her.”

  “You will at the wedding. She’s threatening me with bodily harm. If I don’t bring you to the wedding now, you may not find my body.” I laugh.

  “I like her already.”

  Chapter 18

  Wedding Bells

  Beau

  This has been a beautiful wedding. Andy, Emma, and Tara did an amazing job. A private beachfront wedding that took everyone’s breath away. I couldn’t be more happy for my brother. If anyone deserves happiness like this, it’s Kyle.

  My friends are standing around me, drawing a huge smile to my lips. We’ve come a long way, the seven of us. We’ve been standing at the bar taking this chance to do as we always do. Our time to catch up. We’re all here so we have to have this drink before the night’s over.

  “To Kyle,” Javier says as we raise our glasses for our customary toast.

  “Salud,” we say in unison.

  “Well I’ll be,” Jordan says. “Is that Billy?”

  Everyone’s attention turns to the dance floor. She looks gorgeous. Emma had a stylist come in to do her hair. It’s falling down her back in large ringlets. She has the biggest smile on her face as she and Mason run around Angel on the dance floor.

  “Who got her in a dress?” Javier says.

  “Angel,” I reply.

  “You don’t say.” Javi grins. “I like Angel for you both. I’ve never seen that little girl smile that much. I knew there was something special about him.”

  “She’
s not the only one smiling. I haven’t seen a smile reach your eyes like this in years,” Daniel says.

  I look around at the six men I consider my brothers. Men I’ve come to know and love. Friends I know I can always count on to have my back. “He’s…. Well, the total opposite of what I’m used to. He has that sense of humor I love, but there’s something else I can’t put my finger on. It’s just easy. We fit.”

  “Don’t hurt that he’s fine as hell,” Chris says. “You know how to pick ’em.”

  “Yeah, he is killing that suit,” Ray says.

  “I personally think he took the cake with the man bun and the shape up.” Kyle snickers as he takes in my pink cheeks. He steps away from the bar to place a hand on my shoulder. “But we all need to stop checking Beau’s man out before his fists start flying.”

  “I was just about to point that out.” Daniel laughs, patting me on the back.

  “Billy looks like she could be you guys’ little girl,” Jordan muses. “Would love to see that girl have a good home.”

  “I think you are placing the cart before the barrel,” I say. “Angel and I are just getting started. We have a lot to get through before we can even think about adopting that little girl.”

  “I’m only putting it out there. As much as I want to see her find a home, I’d hate to see her go. I’ve been toying with adopting her myself, but she’s still so wary of everyone,” Jordan says.

  We all turn to look at Jordan. He’s the playboy bachelor of the group. I can’t even imagine him settling down and adopting a kid.

  “Um,” Kyle says in response to Jordan as he narrows his gaze.

  Yup, Kyle’s not the only one that’s on to a change in Jordan. I’ve noticed he’s been making comments that have given me pause. Hey, we’re all getting older and changing. Kyle and I are the youngest. I guess it would be time that Jordan starts to think about what’s next.

  “She’s wary of everyone except for your boyfriend.” Chris nods back to the dance floor, bringing the subject back to Billy.

  She now has her head thrown back in laughter as she stands on Angel’s feet, while he dances her around the dance floor. I take out my phone quick to capture the moment before it’s too late. As I peer down at the image, it’s perfect.

  “Excuse me, fellas. I see something I want to be a part of,” I say, shoving my phone back into my pocket and heading for my Angel and the little angel who’s wrapping him around her finger.

  I walk across the dance floor to them with a huge smile on my face. Angel looks up in my direction when I’m about two feet away. I close the distance quickly as his eyes draw me in.

  “Hey, do you two mind if I join in?” I say.

  “Beau,” Billy sings. “This is so much fun. Come on.”

  She waves me closer, taking one of my hands. Removing a foot from one of Angel’s, she places it on mine. Angel grasps my other hand and we’re all dancing together to Maroon 5’s “Girls Like You.”

  “Can I ask you guys something?” Billy says a few moments into to the dance.

  “Go on,” I reply.

  “You already know,” Angel says.

  Billy beams at him. I’ve noticed that when Angel and Billy have their small conversations, Angel falls into his most relaxed speech. He seems to be building a rapport with her.

  “Does this mean Mas has two daddies now?”

  “Technically, Kyle is Mason’s uncle. Mason lost his mama when he was about four, but Kyle is more like his daddy now, I guess. So when you put it that way, I think you’re about right. He does have two daddies now,” I reply.

  Billy’s fingers flex around mine. I get the feeling they might have done the same with Angel’s from the way his hand firms around mine. Her eyes bounce between the two of us.

  “It’s not my business or anything,” she says more softly. “But… I was sort of wondering. Are you two like boyfriends or something? Not that I think that’s bad like the stupid boys back home.”

  “Yes, we’re together,” Angel tells her.

  Her eyes light up as she looks between us. Her grip tightens. I feel my throat clog with emotions.

  “When can we go horseback riding again?” she asks.

  “When would you like?”

  Her face scrunches up in thought. Angel grins down at her. My heart palpitates as I think of this being my family someday.

  “I don’t want to be a pain or anything. You let me know when you can,” she says, turning on her tough-girl act again.

  “I’ll check my schedule and let you know,” I say, winking down at her.

  Suddenly, the sound of a dish crashing to the floor rings out. It happens so fast, Angel pulls away from us, almost tipping Billy onto her behind. I’m quick enough to catch her and shove her behind my body.

  Angel’s head whips from side to side, his eyes distant and lost. He’s gone. If I don’t do something fast, this wedding day is going to be remembered for the wrong damn thing.

  Against all my better judgment and knowledge, I do something I know I shouldn’t. In a quick move, I pin his arms behind his back. He goes to headbutt me, but before his head gains full momentum, I grasp his face in my free hand and put my lips to his ear.

  “Angel, baby, focus. Focus on me.” I sway his body as the song playing says the same words.

  I caress his jaw with my thumb, making this look as sensual as I can to the outside world. If anyone’s looking close enough, they’ll see the tension in both our bodies. Still, I work to make this look like a simple dance between lovers.

  “Baby, I need you to focus,” I repeat as he gives a struggle. “Angel, come back to me.”

  I go with what my mind tells me. I kiss his temple, coaxing him back to me. Mason appears, placing a hand on Billy’s shoulder and leading her a few steps away, protecting her like a good little man. I’m aware that all of my friends, including Darwin and Andy, have surrounded us.

  They’re not making a scene of this. They’ve all begun to dance around us, covering and positioning themselves to step in if needed. I’m not surprised. I’m grateful. They’re all aware of Angel’s situation; they will do what they can to help.

  “Come on, baby, focus,” I whisper, ghosting my nose behind his ear. When he stops struggling, I look into his clouded-over eyes. “It’s me. Focus on me, right here.”

  Slowly I release his arms and run my hand up and down his back. I continue to present an intense dance between lovers to everyone else. However, the look in Angel’s eyes and the racing of his heart against mine tell a different tale.

  That is until his eyes clear and a look of… appreciation, fear, and gratitude fills his eyes. I nod at him so he understands I have him. I continue to sway him as tears fill his eyes. I shake my head at him.

  “I’m here. I’ve got you. It’s fine,” I whisper against his lips.

  His arms go around me, holding me tightly to him. I flick my tongue over his lips, again coaxing him to relax. I move my mouth back to his ear.

  “Only thing that matters right now is that you’re here with me,” I say, slipping my hand beneath his suit jacket. “Did I tell you how good you look tonight? I’ve been wanting to peel you out of this suit since I saw you in it.”

  “Beau, this isn’t going to work. I shouldn’t be here,” he chokes out.

  I nip his earlobe, then lick the flesh behind his ear. “Bullshit. You’re mine now. You’re right where you belong. In my arms. I told you, focus on me, on us. You’re stuck with me, baby. We’re in this together.”

  “Billy,” he gasps.

  “She’s fine. Me and you,” I whisper, tracing the shell of his ear with my tongue to distract him. “You and me. Let’s stay here. Let everything else go for now.”

  I bury my face in his neck and inhale. My lips brush his skin, and the tension in his body finally fully relaxes. My hand roaming beneath his jacket rubs soothing circles. I lift my head and lock gazes with him.

  “That’s it. Come take a walk with me,” I say.

&nb
sp; He nods, and we turn for the beach. Billy watches us, as she stands with Mama, Emma, and Mason. My family.

  She’s safe.

  Angel

  I can’t believe I almost ruined the wedding. I could’ve hurt Billy. I’m ready to go home. I loosen my tie and kick off my shoes.

  Beau removes his as well. Leaving them behind, we start down the beach, walking against the shoreline. I’m still coiled tightly inside.

  “Can I tell you something?” Beau says.

  “Yeah.”

  “Eric diagnosed me with PTSD a year after the… the incident. While I know mine isn’t nearly as severe as yours, it affects things I wish it didn’t. Like me being able to step into the ring,” he says.

  Realization hits. While Beau trains his fighters from the outside of the ring, he never enters. I’ve never noticed until now.

  “Wait, but you offered to stay with me at the gym the other night. You know I’ve been sleeping on a pallet in the ring, right?”

  “Yeah, I know.”

  “You were willing to sleep there with me, though?”

  “I hadn’t thought about it until later that night, after you left bed. I realized I would’ve tried. I would’ve done my best for you,” he says.

  “For me?”

  “For you,” he says, giving me that heated stare.

  Yet, there’s something more than lust. Something I’ve been trying not to dwell on. I don’t want to get my hopes up. I know where my feelings for him have gone. My skin is still buzzing from his touch on the dance floor. When I focused on him, all I could register was his touch. My thoughts were scattered, but I had a full sense of Beau.

  “Will you try to get in the ring for me if I ask?” I don’t know what makes me ask; the words just tumble out. As they do the desire to see him try rises. I’ve been watching videos of his old fights. Beau belongs in the ring.

  “If you want me to stay the night with you. I’ll try,” he says after a beat.

  “Nah, that’s not what I meant,” I reply.

  He stops and turns to me. His gray eyes turn hard as they search my face. I don’t back down.