The It's Kind Of Personal (Complete 6 Book Series)ies

by Anna Brooks

  “So you went with him the next day?”

  “I had no choice, but yes, I went with him.”

  He calms down a little and sits next to me. “What happened then?”

  “Well, I moved into Eddie’s house with him; that’s where I met Lucy. She’s been my savior. I lived there until I couldn’t take it anymore, which happened to be the same time I found out that my mom was sick … No, come to think of it, I found out about her first, and that was the final straw. I took her and Lucy and I left.” I know he won’t buy it, but I have to, at least, try to avoid the sickening part of the conversation.

  “What happened, Ruby?”

  “I left.”

  “What. Happened?”

  “Well, it’s hard to explain. I guess I need to start at the beginning. Are you sure you want to hear all the details?”

  “Yes, Ruby. I’m sure.”

  “Okay, you asked.” I take a breath and brace myself for the backlash. “The first time he tried to have sex with me, I kicked him in the balls.”

  “Good for you,” he replies immediately. “You shoulda cut his dick off.”

  “After about six months, he finally got sick of his wife turning him down for sex. So one night, he came home with lipstick all over his shirt.”

  “Jesus,” Pierce mumbles. “So that was what made you leave?”

  A bitter laugh vibrates against my throat. “No, that was just the beginning. I broke down after smelling a different perfume on his clothes for months on end … something about my ‘husband’ having sex with other women.”

  “Okay.” His knee shakes as his fingers tap relentlessly against his thigh.

  “Eddie wasn’t necessarily a bad guy. His dad and my dad wanted to merge businesses, and by Eddie and me getting married, it — I don’t know — sealed the deal or some shit. Eddie never hit me; he never forced me to do anything I didn’t want to do, except attend stupid dinners and pretend to be a doting wife. He didn’t want to be with me just as much as I didn’t want to be with him. We sort of had this mutual understanding. He was in love with his housekeeper’s daughter growing up, and he knew he’d never get to be with her. Yes, I was ‘locked up,’ but I was free of Stan, and I knew that deep down, Eddie, at least, understood how I felt, so that was the good part.”

  “What was the bad part?”

  My palms become sweaty, and I rub them against the couch cushions. “Knowing it could be so much better. Just spending that time with you … I knew I was missing out on so much.”

  “You can have that now, though. You know that right, Ruby? You won’t miss anything. You can do everything you’ve always dreamed of and I’ll make sure that you’re happy.”

  “How are you so calm right now?”

  “I’m not.”

  “You seem like it.”

  He just shrugs and reaches down to grab the water bottle.

  “So after a couple of years of, umm, living like that, I got complacent. Stopped caring about anything else. The only thing I looked forward to was when he’d come home so we could … you know?” I pause, remembering the rush I used to feel. “It was what made me feel like I had control for the first time in my life. It was almost like a drug. I can’t explain it, because I don’t understand the logic myself.”

  “I get that.” The huskiness in his voices makes my throat dry. “The feeling of complete surrender and control at the same time. The high of it. The intensity.” The water bottle drops from his fingers, and he crawls over me, his face hovering centimeters above mine, his hooded eyes glassy.

  “Pierce,” I whisper.

  “Have you ever had that taken away from you, Ruby? Has it been in your fingertips, in your arms, and then it just vanished? You knew it would be better than anything you’d ever experienced before, better than any fantasy you could dream up. Knew that it would completely fuck you for anything or anyone else.”

  I lick my lips and swallow to moisten my dry mouth.

  “Yeah, I know how that feels.” He runs a hand down between my breasts and under my shirt to play with the waistband of my pants. “How your entire body itches with need, every breath like a vise in your throat because you don’t know how much longer you can breathe without getting the release you’ve been dreaming about for three fucking years.”

  The conversation suddenly shifted in a direction I didn’t anticipate, but even his intensity and my vulnerability with with what I’m indulging, I still feel so safe with him.

  Chapter 20

  Pierce

  SHE SHIFTS HER BODY so her shoulders are square. “You’re not mad?”

  “Fuck no. If anything, I’m relieved that that’s the big secret you were hiding, and now that I know, we can move on. Why would I be mad?”

  “I dunno …”

  “You did what you had to do. If I were mad, I wouldn’t be like this.” I grab her wrist to direct her hand over the bulge in my pants.

  “You were like that before.”

  “Not like this.”

  “Well, maybe I can help with that.”

  She slides my shorts down along with my boxers. My cock springs free, and she grabs it, pumping up and down slowly a few times.

  “Jesus Christ, Ruby.”

  My stomach tightens from just her touch. I slide my hand under her shirt and run my cool fingertips against her warm skin, her ribcage vulnerable under my fingers. Then I slide her shirt up to her neck, pressing against her throat with light pressure. Her eyes fly to mine, and she sucks in a breath.

  “You trust me, angel?”

  She nods, squirming beneath me, her fist tightening around my cock. “I’d never, ever hurt you. But right now, I need this. I need to know you’re mine and mine alone, okay?”

  “’Kay.”

  I trail my fingers down, pulling the cups of her bra on the way, then grab her wrist and regrettably pry it off my dick. I raise her hand above her head and do the same with the other. “Leave them here.” Her small perky tits point up, and I lean down and flick each one with the tip of my tongue.

  “Sorry, Ruby, but I can’t play with you much longer ’cause I’m gonna fuckin’ explode.” I sit up and unbutton her jeans, then slowly slide the zipper down. Using both my hands, I grab the waistband and the silky blue underwear I know she’s wearing, then slide them down her legs until they’re completely off.

  “Prettiest fuckin’ pussy I’ve ever seen.” I slide down the couch a bit so I’m on my stomach and spread her open to me, every pink inch, shiny and new. Without waiting any longer, I slide my tongue up the entire length of her, starting at the tight little pucker between her ass cheeks and finally ending on her swollen little clit. She reaches down and grabs my head, but I pull my mouth away and shake my head. “Don’t touch, baby, just feel.”

  “Sorry.”

  She puts her arms next to her hips and I shove my tongue inside of her and swirl it around, licking up every drop of her sweetness that I can. Her fists grip the couch cushions and her hips buck with my mouth. I replace my tongue with my finger, pumping it in and out. Her clit swells, begging for attention, so I suck on it and twirl my tongue around the sensitive nerves in little circles. Against my finger, her walls tighten and I slide it out, enjoying the protesting moans echoing around my living room.

  “Hey, look at me.”

  She barely pries her eyelids open, her mouth the same oval shape as air passes in and out, her breaths heavy.

  “Watch.”

  I grab a pillow from behind me and prop it under her lower back so she’s at the perfect angle. Then I grab my cock and rub it up and down her wetness, soaking it in her juices. I pause at her opening, and her eyes widen. “You’re not ready for that yet, are you, angel?”

  She shakes her head and looks away, guilty.

  “Good girl. Always be honest with me, Ruby. Look at me, baby.”

  Her gaze finds mine again, and I lean down, pressing my lips against hers. “It’s okay. As long as I get to touch you and hold you and love on you, I
’m a happy man.”

  “I’m sorry,” she whispers.

  “Don’t be. I want inside you like I want my next breath, Ruby. But I want you to trust me and love me even more than that, so I’ll wait as long as it takes for you to be with me. I just need you to tell me when.”

  She grabs my face and pulls it to hers, kissing me with the same kind of desperation I feel. After a couple of minutes, she pulls back. “Thank you.” Then she makes a show of raising her hands above her head.

  I smile and sit up, putting my cock back where it was before, between her warm, soft, silky folds and slide it up and down.

  “Oh my God,” she moans and raises her hips, pressing harder against me.

  “Still, Ruby.” I push her hips down with a hand, holding her in place while I take the other hand and stick my thumb right by her dripping wet hole. Then I wrap my fingers over the top of her lips, forcing my dick harder against her. With each pass, I make sure to circle her clit, rolling my pelvis and pumping against her soft flesh.

  I use the tip of my thumb to press harder against her opening and begin to move my hips faster. At the same time, I push down on my dick, applying enough pressure to set me off. “I’m about to come. You ready, baby?”

  “Yes,” she pants, her head thrashing from side to side.

  My body shakes as my vision blurs, and I take pride in watching my cum splash on her stomach; a little drop even lands all the way up on her chin. I slide my thumb all the way inside her as she rides out the rest of her orgasm and I practically come again at how fucking tight she is.

  Not able to hold myself up anymore, I collapse on top of her and she wraps her arms around me. “Oh my God, that was amazing,” she whispers.

  “Better than I ever imagined … and I imagined that happening so many ways, but nothing compares to the real thing. Jesus, Ruby. You’ve ruined me.”

  “You’re the one who got me all messy.” Her laughter calms my unstable heartbeat, and after a second I stand and pull her up with me.

  “Let’s go shower and then you can finish telling me what happened.”

  * * *

  Somehow, I managed to behave myself in the shower and am currently in the kitchen while Ruby dries her hair. Her admission didn’t upset me at all. I don’t get why she’d think that I would be, or that I wouldn’t want anything to do with her after she told me. I am pissed on her behalf, though, and will do everything in my power to make her happy and give her the life she always dreamed of.

  “Hey.” She sits on the barstool across from me and puts her phone down next to her. “Nothing from Lucy, so Mom must still be sleeping.”

  “That’s good. Are you hungry? I’m just making a smoothie. Do you want one?”

  She makes a face that tells me the thought of a smoothie grosses her out.

  “Okay, what about an omelet or a salad? Sorry, I’ll have to go get some more food for you.”

  “No, don’t do that. I’m really just not hungry.”

  My mind does the math with how long it’s been she’s eaten, and I frown. “Ruby, you haven’t eaten since what, five? You should at least have a snack.”

  “I’m fine, really.”

  Not liking her choice, but not wanting to seem too overbearing, I sigh and blend my smoothie. I take a seat next to her and wait for her to talk.

  “I like your place. I’m surprised it’s not messier. No, wait.” She shakes her head. “It’s you. I shouldn’t be surprised.”

  “What do you mean, it’s me?”

  “You’re a paradox.”

  I finish my drink and wipe my mouth with a napkin. “Why would you say that?”

  “Look at you.” She makes a show of waving her hand at me. “You’re smart, sexy, strong. You could walk around all cocky and be an asshole because you could back it all up, but you don’t. You respect people, and you’re controlled.”

  “Unless it’s about you, because you make me lose control. I have never hit someone out of anger before tonight. Ever.” I’d do it again, too, if someone talked about her like that in front of me, but I keep that to myself. “Now stop stalling by telling me how amazing I am. Spill it, angel.” She mumbles something under her breath that I can’t make out. “What was that?”

  “I said …” Her arms cross and her eyes soften. “I don’t get how you know freaking everything I’m thinking. What I’m feeling.”

  “’Cause it’s you,” I reply simply.

  She moistens her lips. “There really isn’t much else to tell, honestly. I went to see my mom one day and found out how bad she was. I, umm, blackmailed Eddie into getting a divorce, then blackmailed my dad if he tried to force me to stay.”

  I raise my eyebrows, not really surprised since I knew she was a little badass. “What did you blackmail them with?”

  She bites her lip and smiles. “Nothing.”

  “Huh?”

  “I made some shit up about how I knew everything. Told Eddie I knew about the deal he made behind our fathers’ backs. Threatened my dad that I would go to the gaming commission with the file I stole from his office.”

  “What file?”

  She shrugs. “No clue. I made it up.”

  “They believed you?”

  “I think so. Although I kind of find it hard to believe. I think they figured it would be easier to let me leave than deal with whatever they thought I knew. I just knew I couldn’t take it anymore. I wanted to help my mom. Even though she was never there for me, I knew it was the right thing to do. And I wanted to see you … I needed to see if what I remembered and what we shared those nights was still there.”

  I kiss her on the cheek and rub my nose along hers. “It’ll always be there. I’ll always be here, Ruby.”

  Her arms wrap around my neck and she holds me tight. “I’m tired.”

  “Okay. Let’s go to bed.”

  The sudden stillness of her body makes me lean back to see her worried face. “What’s wrong?”

  “I thought you were going to take me home.”

  “Do you want to go home?”

  “I feel like I should because of my mom. I haven’t been around much, and Saturday mornings we usually get breakfast together. I don’t want to miss that. But I want to stay.”

  Her dedication to her mother is admirable, but selfishly, I want her all to myself. “Okay, how about this? You stay with me and I’ll get you home early tomorrow morning?”

  She glances at the clock on the stove. “Okay, but I need to be home by seven.”

  “I can do that.”

  * * *

  Ruby’s warm body relaxes against mine, my arms wrapped tight around her, assuring she’s here with me. Not going anywhere. Not a figment of my imagination. That this angel who hasn’t escaped a single thought of mine every day for over a thousand days has finally come back to me.

  “I wasn’t even expecting it the night Stan came for me.” Her whispered words send a chill down my spine and coat my heart with bitterness. I thought she was done talking for the night, that her story was finished. “I hadn’t seen him in a while, but when he walked in, I knew. I just knew what he was there to do. All the years of him slapping me around and making me scared weren’t in vain. He always wanted something more, and he decided that night he was going to get it.”

  “Ruby.” It’s all I can say right now. Not an hour ago, she was underneath me and I should have taken better care of her and not pressured her so much. God, I’m an asshole. This is what I was afraid she was going to say. This is what worried the shit out of me, thinking somebody raped her, took away her innocence, because there was no denying when we met she was more innocent that the Virgin Mary herself.

  “He was used to me just taking his shit, but I’d had enough, I was fucking done. Being forced into a marriage after the stupid, lonely childhood I had made me complacent. But I had a rebellious streak in me, so I knew I wasn’t weak. I just knew it.”

  I chuckle a little, remembering the first night I met her. “You aren’t weak
at all, baby. The first time I met you, you squared your shoulders at me and told me you weren’t afraid of me. Fuckin’ blew me away.”

  She rolls over so she’s on her back and stares at the ceiling. “It was stupid of me, honestly, even though I had this feeling about you. When I first saw you I should have gone back inside. That would have been the smart thing for an eighteen-year-old girl to do.”

  “You’re probably right, but I’m glad you went against your gut.”

  “Anyway, with Stan, I snapped. I fought him with everything I had; I grabbed a lamp from my nightstand and clocked him over the head with it. That was enough to make him fall off me, and I ran to the kitchen and got a knife. He ran at me and I stabbed him.”

  “What?”

  “Yup. He didn’t think I’d do it, but I did. I yanked the knife out and he ran away like the little bitch he is.”

  “Damn. But did he … I mean …?”

  Her breath comes out slowly and a single tear rolls down her cheek. “No.”

  “Thank God,” I whisper more to myself than anything.

  “So yeah. That was the catalyst. I came up with this stupid plan, and somehow it worked. Signing the divorce papers was my last step.”

  Grasping her chin in my hand, I turn her head so she’s looking at me. “No, angel. It was the first step to you getting to spread your wings.”

  Chapter 21

  Ruby

  I KNEW HE’D BE up before me, so I’m not surprised that the running water woke me. Picturing him in there again, his ridiculously hard body with soap running down the indentations makes me quiver. Thinking about what we did last night, and knowing how good he can make me feel, forces me to press my thighs together to alleviate the building pressure.

  He hasn’t been inside me yet, but when I’m with him, I already feel so full. I’m kind of scared to go there with him because I’m already in so deep. When we finally make love, I won’t be able to be without him. He’ll have me more infatuated than I already am, and I worry I’ll become dependent on him. Pierce is different from anyone I’ve ever met. I believe him when he says he wants to be with me, but I can’t help the little buzz in the back of my head that says, people lie, they abandon you, nobody loves you.