Transmissions

by Dominic Lyne

mistake them for a couple but Gabriel knows first hand that that is not the case. She looks over in his direction as if sensing his eyes upon her. She waves embarrassedly before knocking on the door. It opens, words are said. Both her and the quiet one look at his window. Gabriel waves, they return it before going inside. As their door closes, he realises he’s naked. He groans and pulls away from the glass.

  Crossing his room he pulls on some jeans and a black t-shirt, then leaves without looking in a mirror. In the sitting room he turns on the TV and pours himself a glass of water. Tuned to a news channel, the TV fills the silence with its morbid tales of reality. A war still rages in some far away country, the economy grows, people starve, mankind marches on like ants, and in local news another murder of a young man. Finger on button the TV switches off. Death, death, death, he thinks. God, how depressing.

  Gabriel looks at his watch. Gulps down another glass of water before shrugging on his coat; he takes one final look around and shuts the door behind him as he leaves.

  He walks down the street, pulling his coat tighter around him against the chill of the February morning. Winter grey casts its shadow across the surroundings. Empty glass eyes watching him, portals to their own worlds within.

  He smiles to himself. Music streaming into his ears, a personal soundtrack for his life to cut out the noise of reality. Creating personal space in a place of none. One more corner and he’ll join the crowds bustling around their automated lives. Walk through a barrier, hop onto the escalator and be taken to the bowels of a city. Travelling like rats in a sewer. Some things never change.

  Underground he sits quietly on the train, the last carriage always less crowded; everyone groups together around the middle, like cattle staying together for safety. He looks around him in disdain. Everyone dressed the same, individuals still being forced to conform. Businessmen, power-suited women, slaves to a wage. All in their own private worlds without care for anyone but themselves.

  I could jump up now and kill any one of them, he thinks coldly to himself. So easily slit their throat, a knife in the gut, a bullet to the head. And what would they do? He smiles. Move away from the scene as quickly as they could and pretend it never happened. Parasites. Leeches. I could kill you all.

  He sighs and holds onto the pole by his chair. The discarded newspaper falling from his lap. The train slows, he gets to his feet. This is his stop. The doors open and he makes his forgettable exit.

  Gabriel puts down his second coffee. Lukewarm as always, corporate coffee never seems hot enough, too concerned with endless flavourings and toppings. He looks up and that guy is still staring at him. Irritated he flicks a page of the local free newspaper, his eyes pretending to read. He knows the guy but his name escapes him. Shit, he thinks. I think I saw him the other night. He looks again. Eyes still upon him, both meet and he takes it as an excuse to come over. Gabriel feels himself go red.

  ‘Hey,’ he says.

  ‘Hello,’ Gabriel replies.

  ‘Remember me? Tomas? We seem to keep bumping into each other.’

  Tomas, Gabriel says the name in his head to remember it as he watches him place his triple espresso vanilla whip with cream on the table. He’s here to stay, he thinks as the vacant seat opposite is occupied. ‘Yeah,’ all he can offer in return.

  Tomas smiles excitedly. ‘Sorry, that sounded well cheesy.’

  ‘Huh?’

  ‘The whole “we keep meeting” line.’

  ‘Oh yeah. Right.’ Please God help me.

  ‘You okay? You don’t mind me sitting here right?’

  ‘No, no. It’s cool.’ Gabriel forces a smile. Shit, I’m burning up.

  ‘So what you been up to?’

  ‘Erm, you know. Stuff.’ Gabriel lets his eyes meet the green of Tomas’. Shit. Something about Tomas’ appearance makes him falter. Piercing eyes, short hair, brown, spiky. Oval face and a casual t-shirt. ‘Yeah, erm.’ His hands fumble on the table. ‘You?’

  Tomas laughs. ‘Same, kinda been hoping we’d bump into each other again. You always seem to move away before I have chance to catch you.’

  Yeah, like you’d be interested in me. Gabriel’s slim figure and shaved head with its long fringe is a stark contrast. Pierced, tattooed, punk. ‘Really? Cool, I guess.’ His voice’s pitch slightly higher, he hides it with a cough.

  Tomas smiles. ‘Yeah.’ His eyes now trying to hide a nervous glint. ‘I was wondering if you wanted to go out later.’

  ‘What, with you?’ Dumb-ass.

  ‘That was the idea.’

  ‘Yeah, cool.’

  ‘Cool,’ Tomas mimics Gabriel as he spins the paper round. ‘So that a “yes” then?’

  ‘Yeah. I think so. Yeah.’ He lets slip a goofy grin that Tomas luckily doesn’t see as he reads the paper in front of him.

  ‘What you make of all those murders?’

  ‘What murders?’ Gabriel can’t focus. He asked me out. Why?

  ‘Those club ones. No one really cares coz he’s only targeting “our type”. I’m pretty freaked out by it all. You must be following it all?’

  ‘To be honest I haven’t given it much thought.’

  ‘Ain’t you scared?’

  ‘Of what? A deranged shadowy killer?’ He pauses, thinks. Smiles. ‘Nah.’

  ‘You’re weird.’ Tomas looks Gabriel square in the eyes.

  ‘Yeah and you’re the one who just asked a stranger out on a date.’ I could kill you for all you know, he thinks. No one would guess it was me.

  ‘A date?’ Tomas raises his eyebrows.

  Shit. Gabriel pitches his eyes to the ground. ‘Erm, yeah, well. Whatever.’

  ‘Chill, I like that. A date it is. I was just playing with you.’

  Asshole. ‘Yeah, I knew that.’ He looks at his watch. ‘I gotta go. Here’s my number, give me a call later yeah?’

  ‘Totally.’

  Tomas gets out of the shower. He looks in the mirror as he dries. He likes what he sees. A smug smile crosses his lips. So nice to know that you’re good looking and see it with your own eyes.

  In his bedroom, he bends, snorts a line, wipes then finishes getting ready. A soap opera in the background flickers its trivial entertainment across his wall. He looks at his reflection again, now fully dressed. Adjusts a few strands of hair and turns for the remote control. The TV switches off. ‘Rat fodder,’ he says aloud to no one.

  He feels his pulse quicken as he walks to the front door. Best not be late, he thinks excitedly.

  The club is packed. It took Gabriel almost ten minutes to find Tomas after being let through the doors. He was a little grumpy to say the least. There’s nothing that can make you feel as pathetic as queuing for a club on your own.

  ‘You alright?’ Tomas shouts over the music.

  Gabriel grins and lifts his drink. ‘Am now.’

  Tomas nods coolly. ‘Glad you came?’

  ‘Yeah.’

  Tomas looks around. ‘Not really my kinda music.’

  Gabriel shrugs. Too late now, he thinks. He feels an arm around him; it’s Tomas. He leans in and kisses Gabriel.

  Embarrassed Gabriel looks around. His eyes spot Rose. She nods with a sly smile on her face. He looks away. That means he’s here. Shit. He looks around, that’s the last thing he needs. That’s something he doesn’t want to mess up over this. What exactly is this? He looks at Tomas, then his eyes look back at Rose, her face says it all. She knows. He shakes his head at her. Making his eyes say ‘Please don’t tell him.’

  ‘Who you looking for?’ Tomas asks, his voice close to his ear.

  ‘Erm. No one.’ Gabriel looks him in the face and smiles. ‘Just thought I saw someone.’

  ‘Did you?’ Tomas’ face is blank.

  ‘No.’ Shit, how’d I get into this situation? He turns his back to Rose as she props up the bar waiting for him. A frown, he wishes he was over there but h
e’s got something to do. Best follow the plan right to the end rather than stop mid-way. Lucky there’s so many people to hide amongst. One face in a crowd of many. He feels Tomas next to him, pushing in close. God, give me some space. He offers a smile. Tomas moves in for another kiss. No, no, no, no. Not here. I can’t be seen with him here. Too many questions I don’t need to answer.

  Gabriel looks back towards the bar, Rose’s attention is on some other guy; next to her drinking a pint oblivious is Niente. A deep sigh, a deep longing sigh. One day. One day but first he has something he needs to do.

  He pulls Tomas in close. ‘Shall we go somewhere quiet?’ He smirks. ‘Somewhere we can be alone for a moment.’

  He feels Tomas nod. He smiles.

  He returns alone. Disgusted. Parasites, that’s all they are. Leeching off each other. So this is what we’ve all become, faces in crowds. Masses of moving bodies thrashing to pounding music. He shudders. Wiping the remaining water off his hands, he slips one into his pocket and pulls out a pill. Leeches bleeding everyone dry.

  He smiles at a few lustful glares. I know you want me, but you’ll leave nothing in return. Creatures. The pill rests on his tongue. One final look around him. He swallows just as he hears the first scream. One pill makes you larger, one pill makes you small, but here’s the pill to forget it all.

  Disappearing into the crowd, he makes his forgettable exit.

  He looks at his reflection. If I could take one pill to forget it all, would I take it? A faint smile crosses his cracked lips. Such a weird thing to