It’s My Party

by Ramy Vance

  “Dragons? You have dragons?”

  “Do we? So many of them. They were the hardest to figure out. That was until we got to humans, but we’ll talk about that in a minute. Dragons are as old as the eldritch, and in some cases older. But their minds are like a cross between orcs and humans. Much of what they experience is purely instinctual: it happens on such a low level of awareness that they couldn’t even articulate it. Yet they have the same level of consciousness as humans. They have distinct cultures with multiple languages and their own myths. To be honest, it was breaking dragons that gave us our first indication of how to work with humans. That, at the moment, is our real focus. Humans are the final race to be reintegrated. It hasn’t been going well. They haven’t responded well to any of the rings we’ve designed for them so far. I personally think it’s because rebellion might be hardwired into their brains. It’s a difficult thing to subvert. Their individuality is also unprecedented, that and how cut off they are from magic. Working with their familiars has given us a little bit more insight, but we are still not close to cracking the code.”

  “What about their familiars?”

  “I needn’t refresh your memory on familiar/ human relationships. You already know as well as I do what it’s like. That being said, we think that there is a link between their lack of magical understanding, the conscious mind, and how they intermingle with their familiars. The military and MERCs also don’t know how this aspect works, even though they employ it without discretion. I, however, will figure it out eventually. And the songs of chaos my family dreamed of will be spread across the universe, each ringtone a microcosm of what they had hoped would come.”

  “That’s very beautiful. I’m glad that you can finally make them proud. Not all of us are so lucky.”

  Zeke looked at Fred, his freakish eye conveying more emotion than Suzuki felt was comfortable. “I…uh…I’m sorry, Fred. I wasn’t thinking—”

  “You don’t need to apologize.”

  “It’s one of the reasons that I felt the need to be so concerned with humans. If it weren’t for their…constant intrusions, we wouldn’t have lost so many. Your family—”

  “Was not killed by humans. They died in this war. They died in the Dark One’s war.”

  “Do you mean to imply—”

  Fred shook his head. “I imply nothing. I know who I serve. That does not mean I am blind.”

  “Please, Fred. You must be careful—”

  “I do not need to be careful. There was no war until the Dark One created one.”

  Fred looked down at Wyatt and pointed at him. “Are you done with this one? There is important intel the viceroy wishes to extract from him, as well as this human’s familiar.”

  “I wasn’t notified of any requisitions for their removal.”

  “Do you wish to relay this to the viceroy? Or should I?” Fred asked.

  Zeke shriveled up slightly and the color of his skin changed from a deep black to a bright white, nearly as white as the rest of the sterile medical facility. “No, no, you don’t have to do that. I can release the human.” Zeke hit a button on the monitor and Wyatt’s restraints were removed. He motioned for Thrak to help Wyatt up and bind him. Thrak did as he was told and handed the restraints to Fred.

  Fred took the chains and motioned for Thrak to shackle Beth as well. Once the humans were properly bound, Fred yanked their chains. Wyatt was hardly able to stand. He was murmuring unintelligibly. Beth stared at her feet, hardly blinking, her teeth grit behind her lips, her jaw slowly grinding over and over. “Now I will need her familiar released,” Fred ordered.

  Zeke floated away, gesturing for Fred to follow him. “This way, old friend,” Zeke said as he led Fred, Beth, and Wyatt to a containment cell where Ros’ten flittered about nervously. The familiar was a massive bee, easily the size of a large cat. Its antennas were bent low, and it was hovering frantically as if it had been pacing for hours. Its massive compound eyes looked up and saw Beth, and the bee dropped to the ground as if in shock.

  It was the first time that Suzuki had seen Beth betray even the slightest sign of emotion. She leaned forward, ever so slightly, as if a breeze had just rocked her. Her eyes widened and her mouth went a little slack, perhaps from the words she wished to pour from her throat. But she wrapped herself back up in the guise of a broken person. At her side, Wyatt registered nothing. Drool trickled down his chin.

  Fred walked up to Ros’ten’s cell and pressed his hand against the blue energy field. It crackled, sending a wave of pain flowing through his and Suzuki’s body, but he didn’t pull his hand away. He just stared at Ros as the bee fluttered its wings and returned the gaze. “Release him,” Fred commanded.

  Zeke floated up to Fred and rested one of his tentacles on the imp’s shoulder. “And what exactly am I releasing him for?” Zeke asked.

  “I require him for the viceroy.”

  “And what does the viceroy plan on doing with them?”

  “Do you seek to question the –”

  “I’m not stupid, Fred. I know you aren’t a spy.”

  All of the blood drained from Fred. Both he and Suzuki instantly ran through a dozen different scenarios. They could torch Zeke and make a break for it. They had the instant transporter that Chip had given them. That was easily the best bet. Beth already knew how it worked, and all they had to do was grab Wyatt. But Ros’ten still wasn’t free. They’d have to figure out how to open the cell first.

  Ros’ten’s cell whooshed open. The bee lazily fluttered over to Beth, who no longer could contain herself and threw her hands around the giant insect, fighting back tears and covering its face in sloppy kisses.

  Zeke’s grip on Fred’s shoulder grew tighter as Fred turned to face the eldritch cyclops’ eye. “None of us was looking for this kind of war,” Zeke finally said. “This…dishonorable shit show. Count yourself lucky that your family did not see you become what I have. Consider this an apology from an elder one to an elder one.”

  “You betray yourself. If—”

  “The viceroy is here. I advise you to stop using that cover. You will be found out sooner rather than later.”

  Fred rested his hand on Zeke’s tentacle. “My father always said you were born a pure nightmare, that the cosmos did not deserve a god such as you.”

  “Yes, and my mother told me tales of you lighting the heavens aflame merely to see them burn.”

  “Thank you, Zeke.”

  “Now be quick. Leave this place. Let the Old Ones find their way.”

  Beth grabbed Fred and Wyatt’s hands. Ros’ten had already been reabsorbed into Beth’s body. Fred touched the headset in his right ear and the world around them melted. Everything broke into billions of pieces and went speeding past them faster than could be seen. They were falling deep into the earth. Suzuki could feel himself being pulled away from Beth and the rest of them, but he held on as tightly as he could. Beth was screaming, and he found that he was as well.

  Then he hit the ground hard.

  Suzuki jumped to his feet. He was back in his body. They were in the grimpon cavern, near the bonfire, where Chip was sitting.

  Chip had apparently finished her repairs. She looked as if nothing had ever happened. She smiled when she looked up and saw the Suzuki and the rest of them. “Looks like your rescue mission went off swimmingly.” She chuckled.

  Beth and Suzuki both fell forward and vomited. Suzuki felt as if his guts had been pulled out of his mouth and then forced back up through his ass. He wanted to sit down, but his entire body was sore.

  Beth was laying on the ground next to him. Wyatt had passed out.

  Diana and Sandy rushed over to help Suzuki and Beth to their feet. Diana pulled out two healing potions and handed them each one. “Go ahead and drink it up,” Diana encouraged. “We have more than enough of them to go around.”

  After Suzuki caught his breath and started to feel normal, he turned to take stock of what was happening in the cavern.

  Soldiers covere
d the cavern’s floor, at least a hundred of them. Many of them were bandaged and laying on makeshift cots. José was tending to the wounded who could sit up, spooning out water from a huge gourd hanging down his back.

  Diana and Sandy were tending the soldiers who now covered the floor of the cavern where the grimpon bodies had once been. The two mages were casting healing spells over the soldiers. The air was full of the smell of early blooms and blossoms, coupled with cinnamon and sage. They were talking as they worked.

  Suzuki walked over to where the soldiers lay to get a better view of what was happening. He was not prepared for what he saw. When he had been freeing the prisoners, all of the military that he had seen appeared to be shallow parodies of humans, their bodies emaciated and frail. In the little bit of time that Sandy and Diana had spent with the soldiers, they had apparently been able to reverse nearly all of the damage that had been done, if not all of it.

  Sandy strolled over to Suzuki and took his hand. “You need to go see Stew,” she said. “He’s worried sick about you. Then bring Beth over. Diana’s going to see to her before we get a whole reunion thing going. She’s probably still in shock. I don’t want to send her over the edge.”

  “Good idea.”

  Stew was posted up by the campfire, which had been built to an extraordinary size. He was slaving over multiple boiling pots and simmering pans. His skin sheened with sweat as he ran with ingredients to what was cooking, back to ingredients, chopping vegetables and seasoning meat. He looked up as Suzuki approached and he smiled widely, dropped what he was doing, and ran over to Suzuki. He threw his arms around Suzuki, nearly knocking him to the ground. “Jesus Christ, dude, I thought you were a fucking goner,” Stew shouted.

  Suzuki pushed Stew off and turned his attention to the variety of delicious smells coming from the pots and pans. “Oh yeah, so worried that you had to stress cook?” Suzuki teased.

  “Fuck you, I wasn’t stress cooking. When I woke up, Diana put me to work. I’ve never seen her look so mean before. I thought she was going to cut my head off. She said it was the least I could do to pay her back for keeping me from dying. Sandy says I wasn’t close to dying, though. Diana’s just being a dick.”

  “It looks like you got a lot of mouths to feed.”

  “Yeah, you would think that I was a chef or something. But I figure it gave me something to do while everyone was getting ready for you and Beth to get back.”

  “So, what the fuck happened to you?” Suzuki asked as he motioned to Stew’s bandaged head.

  “Oh, you know those…grimpons, that was the name, right?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Those grimpons collapsed our tunnel. I got knocked out before any of the fighting got started, which was such bullshit because I have been aching for a good fight. There hasn’t been a whole lot of time for the good lady and me to reacquaint each other with our nasty parts, so—”

  “Stew!”

  “I’m just saying. If I’m not fucking, I’d prefer to be fighting. The two big Fs. But how’d things go on your end?”

  Suzuki knelt next to one of the sizzling pans of meat. He grabbed a fork lying on a plate and skewered himself a piece. The little morsel was cooked better than anything Stew had given him before. It was rich with flavor and coated his tongue with a velvety sensation. “Shit, dude, when did you get so good at cooking?” Suzuki asked.

  Stew didn’t bother to hide how proud of himself he was, all smiles and puffed-out pecs. “Diana and Chip have been giving me pointers and shit. Oh, fuck, dude, did you hear about Chip? The whole…cyborg thing?”

  “Not even sure if she’s that. Cyborg implies you were human once.”

  “Uh, robot?”

  “No, robots are just machines. I think she’s more of an android.”

  “I’m going to hate myself for this, but what’s the difference?”

  “Androids are robots that are built with the intention and capacity to pass as human. And I think half-elf falls in that category as well. Chip was definitely passing.”

  “Everything except for the fucked-up way she talked. It seems like it’s toned down since she got all ripped apart.”

  “I don’t know, I thought it was kinda charming.”

  “Yeah, you would. So, where the fuck is Beth?”

  “She’s in a tent with her captain. He seemed pretty fucked up when we got him back. She’s been through a lot.”

  “I kinda figured. While we’ve been out adventuring and shit, she’s been a fucking prisoner of war. I don’t know what I’d be like after all of that. She was gone for a while.”

  “A couple of weeks.”

  “It probably felt like an eternity. Those tunnels were fucked. I felt like I was locked in there forever. That was just a couple of hours too. I can’t imagine what it must have been like to have been there for weeks. It probably felt like years.”

  “Yeah, she does seem a little worn out.”

  “Sandy said that we should give her a little bit of space at first. Let her settle in so that she’s not overwhelmed. Her dad was a POW, and she said when he came back, he needed a few months to adjust to everything. We don’t really have that time luxury, but a couple of hours might at least give her some room to breathe. Just let her know that we’ll come when she’s ready.”

  “Sounds good.”

  “Dude. I’m glad you’re okay. We were worried ‘bout you there for a minute. Props to getting Beth back. You’re practically 007.”

  “I don’t think that 007 ever did any rescue missions.”

  “Dude, he had to have done at least one. I’m talking all of the 007 movies. There has to be one where he saved someone. You can’t go your entire career as a secret agent and not save one person. Impossible. I’m going to call you out on that one. You were practically 007. Not nearly as suave or charming. You did get the job done, though. Probably looked shitty doing it too.”

  “I looked like a goddamn eldritch imp the whole time. It feels good to be back in my body.”

  “I can fucking imagine. Now get out of here. You’re distracting me from my sauces.”

  Suzuki took another piece of meat and wandered away. He had never seen a camp this big before. There were almost too many people to see. It didn’t really matter, though, because he knew exactly who he wanted to see. He made his way past the resting soldiers to the tent that Wyatt was recovering in. Beth was most likely there.

  The tent that Wyatt lay in was modest, mostly just a cloth pitched over a few rods. Wyatt lay on a cot, his body covered in scars and open wounds. Two electric nodes were attached to his temple. Beth stood next to him, holding his hand while she looked down at him.

  Suzuki’s heart sank when he saw Beth holding Wyatt’s hand.

  Beth looked up at Suzuki. She didn’t bother letting go of Wyatt’s hand. Instead, she motioned for Suzuki to come closer to them both. Suzuki did and stood at Beth’s side. “He was my drill sergeant at boot camp,” Beth explained. “And then I was put in his platoon. He’s a tough motherfucker. I didn’t think that I’d ever see him this…broken. He keeps going in and out, muttering in his sleep. Someone named Diana popped in earlier and cast a couple of healing spells. She said that he should be good as new by tomorrow, at least his body will be. I’m just waiting for him to wake up.”

  “What for?”

  “Orders.”

  “Are you serious? After what you just went through? You all need to take a break. Get some rest.”

  “There’s no time. You heard what Zeke said before we left.”

  Suzuki nodded. He hadn’t forgotten. The Dark One was getting closer and closer to creating a ring that would allow him to control humans just as easily as he controlled orcs and goblins. If that were to happen, the war would be over. Suzuki had already seen a few dwarves under the Dark One’s control and a halfling as well. Humans made up a bulk of the MERCs, and the military was almost entirely human. If the Dark One succeeded in perfecting that ring, that would effectively destroy the military
and disable the MERCs.

  “You think he’s already got a plan?”

  Beth’s face scrunched as she tried to fight back the tears. They came on suddenly, surprising her and Suzuki. Beth choked them back down. “I don’t fucking know, Suzuki,” she whispered. “All of this…it’s way beyond me. I don’t fucking know what to do. That’s not my job. My job is to kill the Dark One’s forces.”

  “You know what he’s going to say when he wakes up?”

  “I have a faint idea.”

  “We’re going to have to go back in there.”

  “Yeah, I know that. I just don’t know what we’re going back in there to do.”

  Wyatt did not wake up for another hour. When he did rise, it was with screaming and shouting, his eyes flashing brightly as he tried to climb out of bed, attacking anyone who stepped close enough to him, screaming until finally he exhausted himself and lay on the cot, breathing slowly and heavily as if each breath was to be his last. When he finally opened his eyes, Suzuki could see that they had lost their shimmer. They sat in his skull like two dead frogs floating to the water’s surface. When Beth placed her hand on Wyatt’s shoulder, he flinched away so hard that he nearly fell out of his cot. His eyes were wide with terror.

  Beth tried again. This time Wyatt let her hand stay. “Sir.”

  Wyatt tried to sit up and groaned in pain. “Where the fuck am I, private?”

  “We got sprung from jail. Meet Suzuki. I told you he’d come for us.”

  Wyatt sat up straighter and looked Suzuki over. A little bit more color and life was coming into his eyes. He cracked a smile, a weak-looking thing hanging on his face like the last leaf of fall. “This stringy bag of bones?” Wyatt asked through a laugh. “This is the guy who busted us out?”

  “Us and half of our military captives. Someone else took care of the other half.”