Trust A Broken Heart

by Ivy Symone

  Nephia’s friendship with Bebe began through a dating app. They connected right away. Coincidentally, Nephia happened to be his daughter’s Kennedi’s dance instructor. With an already established relationship with Kennedi, it made it easier for her friendship with Bebe to gradually develop. They’ve both dealt with domestic abuse in the past in different ways. But she was drawn to Bebe because his experience with domestic violence left him somewhat vulnerable, just as her experience had left her. They found solace in their budding friendship.

  There was an unspoken matter that lingered between them. Sometimes he would hint at it, and other times she would hint at it. It seemed as though when one was ready to deal with it, the other one wasn’t. So, the issue was pushed aside.

  Nephia was attracted to Bebe. He was absolutely gorgeous, family-oriented, responsible, established, driven, loving, and many more positive qualities. Women were contending for his attention all the time. She didn’t want to be in competition for his attention, nor did she want to risk damaging the friendship that she needed in her life. Besides, everyone knew his heart belonged to someone else. Trying to compete with that would prove to be senseless and wasted effort.

  Not even giving Cyn much thought, her eyes shifted to his leg propped up with pillows. She asked, “So how’s the leg feeling?”

  Frowning at his unfortunate condition, he mumbled, “I gotta wear this boot for a few weeks, but it’s feeling better. Kinda achy right now though.”

  Nephia poked out her bottom lip playfully. “Poor baby.” She then narrowed her eyes scornfully. “And I bet you still haven’t stopped working, huh?”

  “Bills gotta get paid,” he joked.

  It was then Nephia became aware of the other voices, chatter, and laughter filling Bebe’s house. She had been a part of Bebe’s orbit for some time now, and it was easy just from listening to determine who all was in his house. And from the sounds of it, he had a house full. Most of the evidence of congregating seemed to be coming from the kitchen, as well as the aroma of pizza.

  “Ms. B!” Kennedi called out with excitement. She came running into the family room with something in her hand.

  While Nephia turned her attention to Kennedi, Bebe looked at Nephia trying to figure out what was different about her.

  “See, I told you I was a jewelry maker now,” Kennedi boasted. “You like it?”

  Nephia held up the many-shades-of-purple beaded bracelet Kennedi had just handed her. “It is nice. And you did this all by yourself?”

  Kennedi nodded with a big grin. “Yep. After I watched it be done a few times, I was able to do it. Not bad for my first one, huh, Ms. B?”

  “No, not at all,” Nephia said. When she tried to hand it back to Kennedi, the young girl shook her head.

  “No, it’s yours. I made that just for you,” Kennedi said. “Nola gon’ let me make more anyway.”

  “Okay. Well thank you Special K. You’re the best,” Nephia beamed. She gave Kennedi a hug.

  Kennedi looked at her father and spat out rapidly, “You okay, Daddy? Was today too much for you, Daddy? You hungry, Daddy? You look like you could use something to eat, Daddy.”

  “Kennedi, get away from me,” Bebe murmured. He could feel his recent dose of painkillers begin to kick in, and his daughter had become annoying.

  Dinky, his best friend and first cousin, came walking in the family room with a big red cup in one hand and a paper plate piled with pizza and wings in the other. He sat down in the chair Cyn had been sitting in.

  Eyeing the food, Nephia stated, “So it’s a pizza kind of night?”

  Bebe mumbled his disenchantment under his breath.

  Nephia’s eyes lifted from the plate to meet Dinky’s.

  “What’s up?” Dinky greeted casually.

  “Hey Dink,” she smiled softly. When his eyes continued to linger on her, she grew uncomfortable. She looked away and focused her attention back on Bebe. “Is there anything I can get you?”

  “I don’t want no damn pizza,” Bebe grumbled.

  Before Nephia could respond, Bebe’s dog, Shadow zipped through the gathering room barking. He went straight to the kitchen where there seemed to be more commotion.

  A loud woman’s voice barked, “All y’all need to get ready to get the hell up outta here!”

  “Aw hell,” Bebe murmured, shaking his head pitying his current life. Nothing had changed about the people in his house at all. Hell, it seemed as though their personalities magnified during the acceptance phase of his loss years ago. They all wanted to constantly surround him and show him all of this love. At one point, they were afraid to leave him alone for fear of him taking his own life. But that happened four years ago, and he hadn’t let that loss get the best of him. However, every year, on the anniversary of that tragic day, everybody came to his house and got on his nerves.

  Bebe could admit that it had taken a while, but he got through it. Was he healed from it? Probably not because he never really talked about it. Everyone was always so careful not to bring it up or to even say Miki’s name. Could he ever love again? He didn’t think he could. Every woman that thought she had a chance with him now was aware of his inability to give of himself completely. But it didn’t stop them from trying. Bebe also made sure they all knew that he wasn’t committing to anything. Nor was he putting one over the other. He didn’t go out of the way to be secretive by keeping his dealings with one away from the others. However, some were more special to him than others. Even more special than he sometimes realized.

  He was expecting to see loud mouth Nola, instead, Bless, Bebe’s twin sister, came into the gathering room holding his little sandy red-headed son. As soon as he saw Bebe, he started squirming in Bless’ arms.

  “Dang, lil boy, I’ma get you to him,” Bless chuckled as she neared the sofa.

  When she passed Yanis to Bebe, a smile spread behind the pacifier in his mouth. His dimpled grin displayed playfulness. Bebe hugged him close.

  “It’s about time you got over here to see me,” Bebe said to Yanis.

  Yanis replied with toddler gibberish.

  “I can’t understand you,” Bebe said going for the pacifier. “How ‘bout you get rid of this thing.”

  “You bet not,” Bless threatened with a laugh. It was too late. Bebe had pulled the pacifier out of Yanis’ mouth and threw it across the room.

  Yanis couldn’t understand why his father would do such a thing and started crying. Everyone but him thought it was funny.

  “Bebe!” Nephia scolded. “That was so mean.”

  “Bebe, don’t be doing him like that,” Bless said. She walked over and picked up the pacifier. She held out her hands to Yanis. “C’mon lil man. Your daddy is a grouch and I don’t know why you’re even crazy about him.”

  “Worst father ever,” Dinky commented through a mouth full of pizza as he watched Yanis climb down from the sofa and scurry off toward Bless.

  “I done told Nola to throw them damn things away,” Bebe stated.

  “You done told Nola what?”

  Nephia, Dinky, and Bebe’s heads turned in the direction of her voice. Sauntering in the gathering room, hips swaying from side to side causing her long bright yellow maxi skirt to wave was Nola.

  Every time Bebe laid eyes on her, it was as if he had to thank God for making such a divine creature. When she entered a room, her look commanded attention either with bold colors or the way her clothes fit to her body. Today, she was a mixture of both. Often, she wore wraps on her head, but today she didn’t. Her sandy red hair was out free in a mixture of loose and tight coils at the crown of her head, however her unruly bangs fell into her eyes. Her signature style needed touching up, but the sides and back were still tapered close. Her natural red hair complemented the tone of her smooth peanut butter complexion and made the toasty pecan colored freckles scattered across her face pop.

  Bebe had been mesmerized by her body since day one and felt it should be sculpted and put on display (Only in his house though). Fu
ll d-cup breasts, svelte waistline, and she had about a good forty-five inches of ass. She had a nice height on her, so she was able to carry her curves around tastefully, but she still captured the attention of both men and women alike. No matter what she wore, she couldn’t hide that body. And it didn’t help that the way she dressed most of the time was like a slutty bohemian chick. Like now, she wore a one-shoulder off thin white blouse that didn’t quite meet the waist-band of her flowing yellow skirt. Though her nipples weren’t erect, he could still see the outlines of them. And if Bebe had to guess, he was sure she was either wearing a pair of bikini panties that had found their way in the crack of her ass or she wasn’t wearing any at all.

  And that was what bothered him the most about Nola. She was untamable. She did her own thing and didn’t care if anyone approved. Sometimes her mouth could be reckless and very unladylike. Yet, he had made her his third baby mother. He couldn’t help it; he fell victim to her unearthly sexual powers. Though the pregnancies had been “accidental,” there was something very intentional about the way Nola had seduced him. It was as if she set out to get pregnant on purpose…both times.

  Apparently, Bebe hadn’t done a very good job at maintaining his distance. A couple of years prior, he found himself in Nola’s bed. He maintained the explanation that she was the one that lured him over and seduced him. Nola never argued against it. But instead of not saying anything as she did with Mikael, she made Bebe aware right away when she discovered that she was pregnant again. Nine months later, Yanis was born.

  Bebe was crazy about his two redhead sons. And as for Nola, she was cool. She could seem a little off at times, but he appreciated her presence in his life more than she knew. He liked to keep her guessing. He almost got a kick out of how clueless she was when it came to his love for her. He had to be careful at times because what he didn’t want was to push her away or into the arms of another man. Yes, it was selfish, but that was how Bebe was when it came to her.

  “I said you needed to get rid of those ugly pacifiers,” Bebe repeated. He eyed the plastic bag she held in her hand. “What’s that you got?”

  Nola made her way over and placed the bag on the coffee table carefully. “I made you something to eat. I knew you’d be over here moping; so, what better way to make your day.”

  “Where mine at?” Dinky asked.

  Nola plopped down on the loveseat neighboring the sofa. “You can come over there and fix you a plate. I made enough.”

  Bebe rose to a sitting position to check out what Nola brought to him. He already knew he wouldn’t be disappointed. He loved Nola’ s cooking. It reminded him of how his grandmother used to cook. Though his mother could throw down in the kitchen herself, she didn’t compare to Nola.

  Bebe started grinning once he saw the plate of soul food. There was also a smaller container inside the bag. “What’s this?’”

  “A piece of my pound cake.”

  “I know you made some Arnold Palmer too,” he said. “Where that at?

  Nola grinned knowingly. “It’s over there. Do you really want me to go get you some?”

  “Hell yeah,” Bebe exclaimed.

  “Shiiid,” Dinky blew out. “C’mon Nola and get this man his drink so I can get a plate.”

  “Y’all so damn wor’some,” Nola complained playfully. She looked at Nephia and smiled excitedly. “You cut your hair!”

  Nephia’s hand self-consciously went to her sleek hair. She blushed. “You like it for real? It’s taken me some time to get used to it.”

  “Yes, I love it. It’s very mod. What made you chop off your hair?” Nola asked as she stood to her feet.

  Bebe now realized what was different about Nephia. She had indeed cut her hair very short. It was becoming on her and maybe that’s why he didn’t notice.

  Nephia shrugged. “I don’t know. Just wanted to do something drastically different. What do you think, Bebe?”

  Bebe gave a half-shrug as he dug in his plate with his fingers. “It looks nice.”

  “Damn, can you get a fork?” Nola teased.

  “I know,” Nephia clowned. “He’s so ratchet.”

  Dinky got up to follow Nola back to the kitchen.

  “Where you going?” Bebe asked.

  Dinky continued walking. “Nigga, you thought I was playing when I said I wanted me a plate too.”

  Bebe shook his head. “That nigga.” He turned back to Nephia. “It does look good like that though.”

  She blushed. “Thanks. It’s not too short is it?”

  “Naw, but you make everything look good,” he complimented.

  “Thanks,” she smiled. She asked, “So, how’s everything been going?”

  “Fine I guess,” he mumbled.

  “Was today better than usual?”

  “It’s definitely better. I went out to the cemetery yesterday and felt just a little sadness today when I talked to Miki’s mama and her sisters.”

  “And how are they doing?” Nephia asked with genuine interest.

  “Ms. Ava still hurt over the loss of her daughter. Talking to her is what always get me down the most. Kizzie and Maddie always try to cheer me up and talk about all of the good memories. That shit be getting to me too. But for the most part, they’re getting by fine.”

  “That’s good to know. I’m glad you’re not just really sulking and isolating yourself like you have in the past.”

  He shook his head. “I think I’m past all that. But I bumped into this girl I was talking to a few years ago…We’ve been communicating a lot so she kinda got me distracted.”

  “What girl?” Nola asked as she walked back into the gathering room. She was returning to give Bebe a fork and paper towel.

  “Damn! Get out my conversation nosey ass!” Bebe said animatedly.

  “You gon’ tell me anyway. If you don’t, you know Kennedi gon spill the tea,” Nola returned.

  Bebe laughed. “You right. But I was just telling Neph that I bumped into this girl I used to talk to. She kinda been taking my mind off a lot of shit.”

  “What girl is this?” Nola asked.

  Expressionlessly, Bebe said, “Her name is Arnold Palmer, the same name as my drink I’m waiting on. Do you know her?”

  “Fuck you,” Nola spat playfully. She headed back toward the kitchen. “I’ll be back with your drink, nigga.”

  Once Nola was out of hearing range, Bebe lowered his voice and asked, “You think Nola and Dinky would fuck around behind my back?”

  Nephia was taken aback by Bebe’s question. She was rather stunned that such a thought would even enter his head. “Nola and Dinky? That’s your cousin and baby mama. I’m sure they wouldn’t cross that line.”

  Bebe didn’t respond; he just sat there in thought.

  Nephia placed a comforting hand on his arm. “Bebe, Nola is crazy about you and she let it be known.”

  “Nola is just crazy, period. And you see how she about to cater Dinky’s ass. She ain’t no different with me than she is with any other nigga. And her nigga was just over there anyway,” he griped.

  Nephia was confused. “What nigga?”

  “You know…That light skinned dude that be coming over there all the time.”

  “Oh!” Nephia was tickled. “Bebe, are you jealous?”

  “Jealous?” he echoed incredulously. “Me? Jealous? Over Nola?”

  “It’s not impossible.”

  “I ain’t the jealous type though.”

  Dubiously, Nephia drew out, “Suuurrree.”

  “When have you ever seen me—”

  “Bebe!” she laughed. “Oh my God! You show it all the time. I don’t understand why you just won’t be with her.”

  Bebe didn’t find the humor in Nephia’s comments. In fact, it made him question her intentions with him. “What about you, Neph?”

  “What about me?” she asked dumbfoundedly.

  He simply replied, “Us.”

  Her smile faded and she stared at him blankly. “Bebe, there could be no us.
It was just something about the way you held on to Miki when we were getting to know one another. Neither one of us were emotionally available at that time either. But somehow, we developed a great friendship in the process. I love and appreciate it. And I’m also aware that you’re still not emotionally available.”

  “Blah, blah, blah,” he bantered. “That’s like the fiftieth time you’ve given that same speech.”

  Nephia laughed. “No, it’s not. Maybe thirty.”

  “But I still can respect it,” he assured her. Then he asked, “Are you trying to talk to anyone new? I know you said that last nigga wasn’t working.”

  Nephia turned up her nose with disgust. “Yeah, that guy was the absolute worse. And there may be someone else I’m getting to know. I’m not sure where things are going, but hopefully he’s the one.”

  “When will I ever meet him to give my approval?” Bebe asked trying to suppress his grin.

  “Are you serious? Your approval? Blyss Blakemore, you are a trip,” Nephia cackled. Interrupting her hearty laugh, her phone alerted her to a new message received. She fetched it out of her pocket and went to her messages. Instantly, her face lit up with a wide smile.

  “That must be him,” Bebe mumbled.

  She blushed with slight embarrassment. She didn’t mean to reveal her giddiness. “It is. I guess I need to get going.”

  Pretending to be hurt, Bebe exclaimed, “Really Neph! You gon’ up and abandon me just like that? Over some nigga?”

  Nephia giggled as she stood to her feet. “Stop that Bebe. If you’re not doing much this weekend, me and the girls will probably stop by. They’ve been asking about your kids anyway.”

  “They’re the first teenagers I know that love being around my kids like that,” he said shaking his head.

  Before Nephia walked off, she whispered, “You think Nola would let me get a plate?”

  Bebe laughed. “Take yo’ lil hungry ass over there and see!”

  Chapter 5

  A fter preparing Dinky’s plate to go and handing it over to him, Nola expected him to leave right away. But he paused at her back door, just lingering. She could even feel him staring at her which made her grow overly uncomfortable.