To Carve a Fae Heart (The Fair Isle Trilogy Book 1)

by Tessonja Odette

  “He…rescued me?” I shudder, remembering the deadly ride on the puca—or kelpie, I should say—and how it drove us into the ocean and pulled me underwater. I remember the burning, searing pain as water entered my lungs, followed by the hands of someone pulling me by the waist. That’s the last thing I remember. “Why did the kelpie try to kill me?”

  “Apparently, dragging lost travelers to their deaths is their specialty, according to Prince Cobalt,” Amelie says. “He had to sever the creature’s mane with a shard of coral to release you from its grip.”

  “But how did Cobalt find me? We were separated during our picnic.”

  Amelie scoots closer, hands an animated flurry, as she explains. “He said he went looking for you when he realized you were missing. There was no sign of you, and he had no idea where you’d gone, but when he caught scent of the kelpie, he knew exactly what had happened. He followed the trail and dove in after you when he saw the kelpie drag you into the ocean.” She puts her hand to her heart and sighs. “He’s so romantic.”

  “Romantic? No. This entire situation—” I swallow my words as another wave of pain radiates through my skull. With a deep breath, I wait for the sharp ache to pass, and force my body to relax back into the pillows. I grind my teeth, hating how helpless I feel, how helpless I’ve been for three days. Three days. Anything could have happened in that time.

  Amelie grabs my hand. “What’s wrong? You look distressed.”

  I press my lips together, eyes flashing toward Lorelei.

  As if the fae can sense my sudden tension, she stands from the bed. “I should go tell the king you’ve woken.”

  “Thank you, Lorelei,” I say.

  Once the door closes behind her, my eyes find Amelie again. I let out a deep sigh. “Tell me what’s happened while I’ve been out.”

  She cocks her head. “What do you mean?”

  “I mean, what have you been doing? Have you continued carrying your knife? And your rowan necklace?”

  She rolls her eyes and pats the sash at her waist, then lifts the strand of rowan berries from beneath the bodice of her dress. “Yes, Evie, I’ve remained well protected. Not only that, but I managed to keep you protected as well. See? I trimmed my necklace in half to replace the one you lost. Yours didn’t survive your little dunk in the ocean.”

  My hands fly to my throat, and I find the familiar feel of rowan berries. The new necklace is noticeably shorter than mine had been, and only now do I realize Amelie’s is half as long as well. I must admit, I’m impressed by her consideration. I would have expected her to abandon the necklace altogether without me reminding her to wear it every day. “Thank you, Ami. Now, what else? Have you been alone with the king?”

  “If you must know, I’ve seen the king for an hour each of the last three days.”

  I try to sit straighter at that, eager for everything she can tell me. “What have you done together? Did he…do anything to you?”

  She stares at me with a pointed look and puts her hands on her hips.

  “Ami, I need to know if you’ve been safe with him. If he tried to hurt you—”

  “Then what? What would you do about it?”

  I open my mouth, but no words come.

  “Look, I know you care about me and you’re afraid for the both of us. But you need to trust me to take care of myself sometimes. I’m not the same fragile girl I was four years ago.”

  I tense. Four years ago. When I almost lost her. It began with a fae glamour and nearly ended with my mother’s folly. If it hadn’t been for Mr. Meeks, Amelie would have died. I shudder, breathing the memories away. It’s not something either of us like to talk about.

  Still, she has a point. Amelie was never to blame for what happened to her back then. It could just as easily have happened to me. And this time, it did. This time, I’m the one who almost died. And if appearance is proof of circumstance, Amelie really does seem well. Her cheeks are rosy, her eyes are bright and alive. Perhaps I’m not giving my sister the credit she deserves.

  I let out a heavy sigh. “I’m sorry, Ami. You’re right. I’ve been treating you like you can’t take care of yourself while I’m the one who keeps getting into these messes.”

  “These messes? Have there been multiple?”

  I blush, again reminding myself she knows neither about me meeting Aspen at the faewall, nor about our tense conversation in the dining room the night we arrived. “So, at the risk of sounding like an overprotective little sister, what can you tell me about the past few days? No, better yet, what would you like to tell me? What wonderful things did I miss?”

  Her smile returns, and she sits closer to me, folding her legs under her. “As you know, the king insists I spend time with him daily. He’s not as bad as you think he is, Evie, although he’s incredibly dull. Pleasant to look at, but no personality. He mostly sits at his desk in his study working while I talk and drink wine and eat the most decadent confections.”

  It’s hard to reconcile my experience of the king with Amelie’s. I can’t imagine he and myself sitting alone in the same room without it ending with my knife at his throat. Never would I picture him as dull. Hostile, arrogant, and impossible maybe, but never dull. Then again, my sister is much more agreeable than I am. “What else?”

  She lowers her voice. “Well, there’s this handsome servant. I saw him yesterday when I asked Aspen to have some wine brought in for me during our daily chat. My goodness, Evie! I had no idea fae could be so beautiful.”

  I want to shake my head but know the movement will jar my skull. Instead, I settle for a smirk. “Leave it to you to find romance in captivity.”

  “It isn’t hard. Have you even taken the time to look at the males here? I can hardly remember what Magnus looks like anymore.”

  “Wasn’t it just three days ago you were lamenting over not having taken Magnus to bed?”

  “I can still lament such a thing while making room in my new bed. Metaphorically speaking, of course. You’ve been taking all the room in my bed the last three nights.”

  I laugh, but sober quickly. Again, it’s my turn to cut through Amelie’s optimism with my brutal realism. I lower my voice. “You do know your bed is already spoken for, right?”

  She shrugs.

  “Ami, I’m serious.”

  “Oh really? I thought you were serious when you apologized for treating me like a helpless child.”

  I press my lips together. “You’re right. I’m sorry. Again.”

  “My bed. My business.”

  I reach toward her and lay a feeble punch on her arm. “Not while I’m in it. Dirty harlot.”

  She giggles and punches me back. “Haggard prude.” Before I can muster the energy to lay another blow, a knock sounds on the door. I expect it to be Lorelei returning, which means she’ll barge in any moment. When the door remains closed, Amelie springs from the bed to see who’s there.

  “Your Highness,” Amelie says. My heart races as Cobalt enters and approaches the bed. I find myself suddenly self-conscious, knowing I couldn’t possibly be pleasant to look at after surviving a near-drowning and sleeping for three days. I do my best to summon an air of confidence and meet his smile with my own. “You’ll forgive me for not standing to curtsy, I hope. I don’t think my aching head would allow it.”

  “Only if you’ll forgive me for not better protecting you on our picnic.” There’s remorse in his eyes, hesitation in his voice. He looks like he’s worried I might be angry with him.

  It gives me pause, and I choose my words with careful consideration as I navigate the best way to assuage his guilt. “Of course, I forgive you. Besides, if the rumors are to be believed, you did valiantly rescue me.”

  “Barely. If I had taken any longer…well, I don’t even want to think about what could have happened.”

  I blush beneath his gaze and turn away, looking instead at Amelie. She, however, isn’t looking at me at all. Instead she’s swooning over Cobalt. When she finally meets my eyes, she arches a
brow. I can almost hear her thoughts. See? So romantic.

  Cobalt shakes his head as if to clear his thoughts. “Anyhow, I’d hoped you’d be well enough to join us for dinner, but you still seem out of sorts.”

  I cringe at the thought of leaving the bed. “I’ll have to decline tonight, Your Highness. But I thank you for the invitation. And for your concern.”

  He turns to Amelie. “You’ll join us, though, won’t you? I’m sure my brother would appreciate your presence.”

  She beams at him. “Of course I will.”

  My eyes bore into Amelie, and I want to tell her she can’t leave me. It takes all my willpower to remain quiet. I have to trust her to protect herself. Especially when I’m in no position to leave my bed.

  “Very good,” Cobalt says. “Dinner should be ready by now. I’ll meet you and the others in the dining room. Would you be so kind to give me a minute more to speak with your sister?”

  She looks from him to me, then back again, finally understanding his request for privacy. Again, it’s a struggle not to tell her to stay. “Oh, yes! Yes. Of course.” With a curtsy for him and a smile for me, she leaves the room.

  As soon as Cobalt and I are alone, he sits at the edge of the bed. He seems suddenly shy, as if he’s too embarrassed to meet my eyes, his gaze instead fixed on my hand. “I came to see you a few times.”

  His words spark a memory, his face looking down at me, my hand in his. Other similar memories flash through my mind, of the other faces who’d come to see me. Amelie, Foxglove, Lorelei, and—strangely—King Aspen. “I briefly remember, but I apologize if we exchanged any words. I remember nothing else.”

  He shakes his head. “We didn’t speak. The most you produced was an incomprehensible mumble until now.”

  Heat rises to my cheeks. “How humiliating.”

  “Humiliated was how I felt when I woke up at our picnic and found you missing. I couldn’t believe I’d fallen asleep.” Finally, he meets my eyes and reaches a tentative hand toward mine until he covers my fingers in his.

  I flinch at the touch but don’t pull away. “Your hands are cold.”

  He grimaces. “Part of being a nix,” he says. “That’s a kind of sea fae. Do you dislike it? The cold, I mean. Or my touch?”

  His vulnerability tugs at my lips, pulling them into a smile. “No, I don’t dislike it.”

  He grins, keeping his hand in place. “I really am sorry for not protecting you better.”

  I want to argue that I don’t need protecting, but the point would be moot. I’ve already proven the opposite to be true, as much as that fact irritates me to no end. “It’s not your job to protect me. I should have protected myself better.”

  His brows knit together. “As your fiancé, it is my job. But it isn’t just duty that makes me want to protect you.” He averts his gaze, expression shy again.

  I’m at a loss for words. Could Cobalt have actual feelings for me? I knew he was kind when I first met him. At the picnic, I realized he was easy to be around. But could our relationship mean more to him than a forced arrangement? Could he…like me?

  Cobalt meets my eyes again, and I know no one has ever looked at me the way he’s looking at me now. He’s looking at me the way men usually look at Amelie. Like I’m worth looking at. Like I’m interesting. Fascinating. Pretty. “When I saw the kelpie take you underwater, I thought I was going to lose you forever.”

  My heart races beneath the weight of his stare. He inches forward, and I wonder if he’s about to kiss me. My breath catches in my throat. Do I…want him to kiss me?

  His eyes study my face, then stray down my neck, hovering over the skin exposed above my nightdress. There’s a hunger in his eyes, something I’d be delighted to see in any other circumstance, but right now I’m painfully aware of how awful I must smell, how crazy my hair must be. Cobalt doesn’t seem anything but pleased to be near me, but there’s no way I’m going to experience my first kiss with my future husband from my almost deathbed. At least let me bathe first.

  I pull my hand from beneath his and drag the blankets higher over my torso, wishing I could cover my face and the flush of heat I know is clear on my cheeks. “You should enjoy your dinner, Your Highness, and I should get some more rest.”

  He opens his mouth as if he wants to say something but resigns with a nod. “You’re right. I shouldn’t keep you up.”

  The disappointment in his voice makes my heart sink, and I have the overwhelming urge to see his smile return. “Will I see you tomorrow?”

  I’m rewarded with his beautiful grin. “Of course.”

  When he departs, I’m left staring at the ceiling, puzzling over my thoughts and feelings. Cobalt was going to kiss me, I’m sure of it. And if I’d felt more confident, I would have let him.

  I turn on my side and cover my head with my blankets. Amelie’s question from just a few days ago rings through my head. Do you think we could come to be happy here?

  I’m starting to wonder if that question wasn’t so stupid after all.

  Chapter Seventeen

  The next morning, I only feel half as terrible as I did the night before. Bright light streams through the windows, telling me I’ve slept late into the morning. Not only did I sleep late, but I slept deep too. The last thing I remember was my almost-kiss with Cobalt. I don’t even remember Amelie coming to bed after dinner, or her getting up this morning.

  Wait. Did she even come to bed?

  My curiosity over her whereabouts is a welcome distraction from the other thoughts on the periphery of my mind—Cobalt’s eyes as he drank me in, moments from closing the distance between us. And, of course, my subsequent reaction. It isn’t long before those memories take over all other thought, making my heart race. At the time, pulling away from the potential kiss made sense. I was tired, dirty, weak—humiliatingly human. Now, after a full night’s sleep, my reaction feels mortifying. He’d tried to kiss me. Kiss me. There was a strong part of me that wanted it. Yet, I rejected him.

  Now I can only face the facts. I was scared. And not for the reasons I’m used to fearing about the fae. I was afraid because I’m not like Amelie, with her rotating list of endless suitors and lovers. The few courtships I had back home in Sableton were nothing to give up medical school for. Yet, none of those men had ever looked at me the way Cobalt did.

  What would it have been like if I’d let him kiss me last night?

  I let out something between a laugh and a frustrated moan as I smother my face in my pillow. A moment later, the sound of the door opening grabs my attention, sending me bolting upright. To my relief, there’s no pain shooting through my skull at the motion.

  “Good morning,” Lorelei says in her bored tone. “Your sister said you might be up by now and would likely enjoy a bath.”

  “I would, thank you.” I swing my legs over the side of the bed and place my feet on the cold marble floor. “Where is my sister, anyhow?”

  She’s taken aback for a moment, likely surprised I’ve accepted her help for once. “She was at breakfast. Now I believe she’s walking the palace grounds.”

  I swallow the anxiety that bubbles up inside me. “Alone?”

  “Well, Foxglove and I were at breakfast with her, but she didn’t say if she was enjoying company on her walk or not.”

  I want to demand her reasoning for allowing Amelie to go anywhere alone but stop myself. Lorelei is our lady’s maid, not our guard. And Amelie can take care of herself. At least, I promised I’d pretend to feel that way.

  “King Aspen and Prince Cobalt will be at dinner tonight,” Lorelei says. “They request the presence of both of you. That is, if you are feeling up to it.”

  “I am.” Even if I hadn’t been feeling better today, I’d still force myself to go. I’ve let Amelie out of my sight long enough.

  “Very well. I’ll put the order in for your bath.”

  After she leaves, I walk around the room, testing my legs after being dormant for so long. I move from the bed to the dressing tab
le where I find my tattered gown—or what remains of it. To my relief, my dagger lays on the table next to it, belt intact. At least that wasn’t lost during the struggle, although it didn’t do me any good when I needed it. I set it behind the dressing screen so I can put it back on when I get dressed. When I return from behind the screen, wafts of steam draw my attention to the tub, which is suddenly full of swirling, fragrant water. I approach it, puzzling over how or when this happened. I’ve still yet to discover any source for the water to come through, not to mention the herbs and flowers floating on the surface.

  Whatever the case, the bath is too tempting to linger outside it, and moments later I’m sinking into its comforting depths, forcing my questions and hypotheses to recede from my mind. I let out a heavy sigh, closing my eyes and feeling my muscles relax in response to the luxurious heat.

  It’s a struggle to pry my eyes open again when I hear the knock on the door. A moment later, Amelie bounds into the room and Lorelei follows closely behind. The two are laughing, as if sharing a joke, and I feel a squeeze in my chest. Since when did they become such fast friends?

  “Lorelei, dear,” Amelie says, “will you pick out a dress for my sister to wear today? She must look her best for dinner tonight. Oh, and see that Foxglove comes to do our hair.”

  “Of course,” the fae says, then goes to the wardrobe.

  Amelie comes to me and perches on the side of the tub. “You look much better today, Evie. How are you feeling?”

  “I’m feeling well. How are you? Your cheeks are flushed.”

  She sighs, not meeting my eyes. “It’s a beautiful day outside. I should have waited for you to wake before walking the grounds, but I just couldn’t bear it. I’m sorry.”

  There’s something about her tone and the way she averts her gaze that gives me pause. She’s hiding something. “Who did you walk with in my stead?”

  The pink in her cheeks deepens. “Oh, the palace is abundant with good company, if you know where to look. The residents and staff are most friendly, as you will soon learn once you’re ready to move out and about again.”