Where the Heart Takes You

by Virginia Wise

  * * *

  Greta felt satisfied that she had resisted every urge to look Jacob’s way. I have more self-respect than that. Everything in her had screamed to look toward him, to catch his eye and communicate how she felt with a truthful, burning look. But not when Catrina Witmer is on his arm.

  “Ah, Greta. How do you do?”

  Greta jumped.

  Amos grinned. “I am sorry that I startled you.”

  Greta shook her head. “Not at all. I am fine, Amos. How are you?”

  “I am very well. Very well, indeed!”

  “You are certainly in a fine mood.”

  “Ja. I was just thinking how good it is to see our Jacob escorting a young woman home. Why, just a few weeks ago I thought we would never reach him. But look at this!” He shook his head and grinned wider. “It looks like Jacob’s heart has finally healed.”

  Greta swallowed and checked the oven temperature with her hand so that Amos could not see the expression on her face.

  “You know, Greta, I really did think that you two were a perfect match. But you were right, I suppose. You insisted all along that it was not meant to be. And now, just look at how well everything has turned out.” He patted Greta’s arm. “Now, I do give you credit, child. You were a good influence on him even though you were not interested in a relationship.”

  Greta straightened up. “What do you mean?”

  “Just look at the difference in him. His heart is with Catrina, but you were the one who reached him so that he could find love again. You reopened his damaged heart.”

  “Me?”

  “Ja. Who else?”

  “Oh, I just . . . I don’t know . . .” Greta picked at the ties on her prayer kappe. Amos’s words made her feel uneasy. “What makes you say that?”

  “Is it not obvious? He was despondent until you arrived. We all watched you draw him out of his shell.” Amos shrugged. “That is why we all thought that you were meant to be together. We all saw how he reacted to you.”

  Greta shook her head. “That is what the Widow Yoder says. But, Amos, how could any of you think that? He has chosen Catrina!”

  “Ja, and it is wonderful good, is it not?”

  Wonderful good?! Amos’s enthusiasm felt like a cheese grater scraping against Greta’s heart.

  Amos motioned down the path. Jacob and Catrina looked very small in the distance, arms still linked. “Thanks to you. Without your help, I do not know if Jacob would have ever loved again.”

  “Mmmm.” Greta tried to sound enthusiastic, but all she could manage was a murmur. I brought them together? Great. Just great.

  Amos looked down at Greta. “And how are you, now that no one is pressuring you to marry the wrong man?”

  “Oh, I am fine. Completely fine.” She forced a smile. “I feel splendid. Absolutely splendid.”

  “Wunderbar!”

  Greta stood frozen with the fake smile plastered on her face and wished she could disappear. She took a long, deep breath and made a promise to herself. I will put my efforts into the gifts der Herr has given me. I may not have Catrina’s worldly beauty, but I have other attributes that are more lasting—and more valuable.

  “Actually, Amos, I have been thinking.” She swallowed and considered how to word her request.

  “Ja?”

  Greta squared her shoulders and plunged ahead. “It is clear that the Grubers have their hands full. They cannot keep the Fisher twins forever. Even with the new addition, the cabin is too small for their growing family. And Mrs. Gruber is exhausted. With another little one on the way, she needs more rest.”

  “Ja. True enough.”

  “Well, I thought that perhaps Peter and Eliza could stay with the Widow Yoder and me.” Greta’s stomach tightened with need. Let this work out. I want to be there for those children. I want to use the gifts that der Herr has given me.

  Amos tugged at his beard. “I should talk this over with Abraham. I have no doubt that you would make a wonderful foster mother.”

  “But you wonder how we would put enough food on the table for them.”

  Amos spread out his hands. “Well, ja.”

  “I earn a little through teaching, as you know. We will manage. And the settlement will be generous, I am sure. That is our way.”

  “Ja. That is our way.” Amos tugged at his beard again. “Well, it probably makes more sense for Jacob and Catrina to take them in, assuming they marry. And why wouldn’t they?”

  “Indeed.” Greta looked down. “Why wouldn’t they?”

  “But, until then . . .” He shrugged. “Let me speak it over with Abraham.”

  * * *

  Greta felt a newfound strength as she walked home with her freshly baked bread. The crust had burned black, as always, but even that could not dampen her optimism.

  Ruth looked up with surprise when Greta swept through the door. “Aren’t you looking happy? What has you in such a good mood? Let me guess. You finally managed not to burn the bread!” Ruth clapped her hands in anticipation. “Let’s have a slice right now.”

  “Um. No.”

  “Oh.” Ruth sagged against the backless bench. “Then what?”

  Greta set the basket down by the hearth and warmed her hands. “I spoke to Amos today and he thinks that it is a good idea for Peter and Eliza to live with us, at least for a while.”

  Ruth’s face brightened again. “That is good news.”

  “Ja.” Greta glanced at Ruth. “You do not mind, do you? It will not be too much for you?”

  Ruth waved her hand. “No. A child is always a blessing.” She looked away. “I was never blessed with one of my own, you know. It will do me good to see children at my own hearth. They will be the grandchildren that I never had.”

  Greta grabbed the broom. “I am so glad that we are of one mind on this.” She swept the hard-packed floor in quick, firm motions. “I am going to get this place ready!” She grinned. “Won’t they be happy when they hear? They have been asking to live with us for some time, you know.”

  “Ja, I know.” Ruth eyed her young friend. “I cannot help but notice a shift in your mood. You are feeling better?”

  “I just know that I cannot compete with Catrina on her terms. I have to be myself. And if that is not enough, then Jacob was never the right man for me. I do not have her beauty, but I have other attributes. Like teaching and taking in the twins.”

  “Those gifts are more important than the gift of outward beauty.” Ruth patted Greta’s arm. “And I am sure that everyone in our settlement would agree. We all strive to be Plain here.”

  Greta frowned. Not everyone. She shook her head and dismissed the thought. She refused to let Catrina spoil her newfound peace.

  Chapter Nineteen

  Jacob stood up, stretched his back, and surveyed the new chicken coop. “All finished.”

  Catrina’s grandfather set down his hammer and shook Jacob’s hand. “Thanks for the help.”

  Catrina appeared as if on cue. “Jacob, you must stay for dinner.”

  Jacob shook his head. “I appreciate the offer, Catrina, but I best be getting on.”

  Georg Witmer nodded and headed toward the cabin while Catrina lingered by Jacob’s side. “What would we do without you? The foxes took three chickens this week.”

  Jacob eyed the new chicken coop as he packed away his tools. “Looks sturdy enough. I think it will do.”

  “I am sure it will do very well. You are an excellent carpenter.”

  Jacob shrugged and deflected the compliment. “’Tis nothing.”

  Catrina smiled. “I will have to bake you a cake. We will have plenty of eggs for one, now that the chickens have a safe place to lay.”

  “I would not complain if you did.” He glanced at the sun’s position in the sky and nodded to Catrina. “I best make haste. I have my own farm to tend.”

  “Must you?”

  “I am sure that you have your own chores to take care of, as well.”

  Catrina shrugged. “It is
not baking day.”

  “Surely there is much more to do around here than bake.”

  Catrina shrugged again, then smiled. “Do say that you will stay for dinner.”

  Jacob shook his head. “I have the stock to feed.”

  Catrina sighed and pushed her lip into a pouty expression. “Please?”

  Jacob sighed and glanced at the sun again. He frowned. “Okay. But I cannot stay long.”

  Her face brightened and she clapped her hands. “We already have a venison stew simmering in the cauldron. It should be ready by now.”

  Jacob’s stomach growled and he realized how hungry he was. “That sounds perfect.”

  The rich smell of roasted game welcomed them as they walked through the cabin door.

  “Jacob will stay for dinner, Grandmother.”

  “We are glad to have you,” the elderly woman replied as she took Jacob’s coat and hung it on a peg. “It is the least we can do for you after the work that you put in for us today.”

  “I am happy to help. And your husband is good company. He is handy with a hammer and nail.”

  Georg shrugged. “I am not an adventurer, Jacob. I know how to put a hammer to a nail, but this is a strange, inhospitable land. It is good to have men like you to show us how to survive.”

  “The Rhine River Valley is easy to farm, compared to the endless forests here.” Jacob shook his head. “I have done little but clear land for the past twelve months.”

  “It is a wild, lonely place, compared to home,” Catrina remarked as she sat down at the table. Her grandmother set the table and ladled out servings of stew as the young woman rested her chin on her hands and stared into the fire.

  “My granddaughter is accustomed to the lively streets of Philadelphia, you see. She is not at home here. She is still learning our ways.” Jacob watched Frena pass out the food as her granddaughter sat with her soft white fingers folded like a delicate china doll. “My husband and I found the Amish faith after our children were grown and we all moved to the New World. They did not convert when we did, so Catrina was not raised Amish.”

  “I grew up in my father’s general store, surrounded by all sorts of lovely things. Lace, and furs, and candy.” Catrina’s expression perked up as she remembered the luxuries that once defined her life. “We never ran out of things like coffee or sugar. And I had new bodices and hosen whenever I wanted.” She sighed. “I even had a housekeeper.”

  “What brought you here, Miss Witmer? It is a very different world that you have taken on.”

  Catrina shrugged. “I have never experienced anything except the life of a shopkeeper’s daughter.” She looked down. “But I have always felt as if something were missing, even with all of those luxuries.” She sighed and traced a pattern in the tabletop’s wood grain. “I suppose I believe that there is more to life than that.”

  Jacob nodded. “Then you have come to the right place.”

  Frena put a jug of water on the table and sat down with the others. “It is a joy to have her along, but it has been quite a strain on her.”

  Catrina waved her hand and smiled. “With friends like Jacob to help, I am learning how to fit in just fine.”

  Jacob cleared his throat and shifted in his seat. “Do you not miss the city, Catrina?”

  “Ja. I miss it very much.”

  “Will you return?”

  She gazed into his eyes. “That depends on if I feel there is a reason to stay, Jacob.”

  “The ability to worship freely as Amish—is that not a reason to stay, Catrina?”

  Catrina looked away. “Naturally.” But her tone sounded flat and halfhearted.

  Georg frowned at his granddaughter. “Do not worry, Jacob. She will learn our ways.”

  Frena nodded. “She just needs the right partner to help her find her path.”

  * * *

  Catrina’s soft hands and sparkling laughter lingered in Jacob’s mind as he walked home after dinner. But is there a Plain heart behind that enchanting smile? He sighed as his thoughts drifted to another woman, one who’s lively green eyes sparked with depth and understanding.

  “Good evening, Jacob.” Amos and Abraham paused on the path in front of him.

  Jacob looked up. “I did not notice you two. Good evening.”

  Abraham nodded. “Ja. You seem deep in thought.” The two elders waited for a response, but Jacob did not disclose what was on his mind.

  “I see you are headed away from the Witmer farm.” Amos pointed his chin in that direction. “Paying Catrina another visit?”

  Jacob frowned. I am not going to be able to avoid this topic of conversation, am I? “I helped her grandfather build a chicken coop.”

  Abraham nodded. “Always doing your part.”

  Jacob shrugged. “Just doing what is expected of us.”

  Amos grinned. “But not all of us have a pretty young lady waiting with a nice dinner, after our work is done.”

  Jacob shrugged again. Abraham slapped him on the back. “You cannot hide your courtship from us! You think we have not noticed that the two of you make a fine match?”

  “Well, I don’t know if I would call it a match . . .” Jacob rubbed the back of his neck. “At least not yet. I do have to admit that it is moving in that direction.. . .”

  Amos waved him off. “Bah! I realize that we missed the mark with Greta, but you cannot deny that you and Miss Witmer are meant for each other!”

  “It is a relief to see you find your way.” Abraham stabbed the air with his pointer finger. “We have noticed quite a change in you, Jacob!”

  “Oh?”

  “You have come out of your shell. Have you not noticed?” Amos spread out his hands. “We see you smiling, talking. You seem as if you are getting back to yourself again.”

  “Ja.” Jacob removed his black beaver-felt hat and ran his fingers through his hair. “I don’t know.”

  “We know. We see the change.”

  Jacob sighed and replaced his hat. “I appreciate your concern, but—”

  “Come now, Jacob. We are a community here. You cannot hide from us!” Abraham slapped his back again. Jacob flinched. “Ja. I can see that.”

  “So, can we expect a wedding soon? We want to see you settled.” Amos put his hand on Jacob’s shoulder. “Man was not meant to be alone. It is time to put away the past and move into the future.”

  Jacob sighed. “Ja. I can see that now. But I don’t know. . . .”

  Amos’s head bobbed up and down. “Ja! Ja! I am glad that things are moving forward!” He motioned in the direction of the Witmer cabin. “With you and Catrina, that is. It sure seems funny now that we all had Greta pegged as your future bride.” Amos shrugged. “Of course now it is clear that we were all wrong on that account. I just spoke to Greta about you yesterday, as a matter of fact.” Jacob felt his stomach tighten. “Ja,” Amos continued. “She is a dear sister. A hard worker and an eager servant.”

  “What did she say about Jacob?” Abraham asked. “Just a few weeks ago we were pushing a marriage between them. How does she feel about that now?”

  Jacob’s stomach churned as he waited for the answer.

  “She agreed that it was the wrong path.”

  Jacob shifted his weight from one foot to the other. Why am I so disappointed? What did I expect her to say? I have already heard this from Jonah.

  Abraham stroked his beard. “She would be surprised to hear what an impact she had on Jacob, I believe.”

  “Ja. She was. When I told her—”

  Jacob put up a hand. “Wait a minute. You two are discussing me as if I am not here. What makes you think that she had an impact on me?”

  Abraham cocked his head. “Is it not obvious, Jacob?”

  Jacob frowned in reply.

  “She is the reason you are able to let Catrina into your life!” Amos threw up his hands. “Can you not see that?”

  “Ja.” Abraham nodded. “Your heart did not soften on its own.”

  Jacob frowned. “I
do not know about that.”

  Both elders shot Jacob a dismissive look. “She did not see it either.” Amos grinned. “Funny how things go.”

  “Hilarious.”

  “Ja. But she has moved on now,” Amos said.

  Abraham smiled. “She has come a long way since her arrival, little more than a fortnight ago. I remember that she struggled at first. But she has risen to the challenge.”

  “Ja,” Amos agreed. “She is taking in the Fisher twins. She has found a good future without you, Jacob. A relief, I know. A man like you could leave a trail of broken hearts if he were not careful! But you are free to pursue the lovely Catrina!” Amos slapped Jacob’s back and chuckled.

  Then why am I the one who feels brokenhearted?

  Jacob could not listen to one more word about Greta Scholtz. He murmured a quick good-bye and headed down the path, but thoughts of the young schoolteacher invaded his mind. He remembered how incompetent she looked when she fell on her backside the first day they met. She had not seemed cut out for backcountry life. Not one bit.

  And yet, she persevered. She fought to succeed. Jacob swallowed hard. Will Catrina fight as hard as Greta did to fit in here? He remembered how Catrina sat at the table as dainty as a porcelain doll, while her elderly grandmother waited on them all during supper. Will she take on a servant’s heart? Would she become a second mother to the settlement’s children as Greta has?

  Jacob frowned and wrapped his coat closer, but the cold night air still cut through him. Why am I even comparing them? Greta is not even interested in me. He shook his head. Only a fool chases a dream that cannot be his.

  Chapter Twenty

  Rainwater found its way through Jacob’s shingles once again and he trudged onto the roof to make repairs. Truth be told, I spend more time on my roof than under it! Jacob did not want to admit what distracted him from the task at hand. But his eyes kept wandering to his neighbor’s land to scan the landscape for Greta. Water from the recent rains formed narrow streams that sparkled across the old woman’s field and drained into the creek at the base of the hill.