Finding Serenity in Seasons of Stress

by Candy Paull

  You can also apply the ideals of parenting to yourself. The ideals may not match the reality you experience, but they can be archetypes of potential that help keep your intention clear in a complicated world. Parent yourself gently in the difficult and challenging times that life brings. One day you will emerge from that season into a happier and more fruitful time. You will understand that the challenges made you strong and drove your roots deeper into the ground of your being.

  The hardest winter, the most difficult passage through the valley of the shadow of death, will one day give way to the soft newness of returning spring. Nature teaches the lessons that the heart finds hard to learn. No matter how long the winter, spring always comes with the luminous astonishment of sun and spring flowers. It is not theory or theology that ministers to the broken heart, but presence and power, love and forgiveness, blessing and release.

  Give yourself the gift of fully appreciating the seasons of life, moment by moment. And give yourself the gift of allowing yourself and those you love to grow and change and evolve. Trust the wisdom of life to guide you through the changes and losses you encounter, just as you trust that spring will follow winter.

  Activity: Invest in a Massage

  If you are under stress, especially when caring for others, it’s easy to forget to nurture yourself. You cannot serve others well if you are exhausted and overwhelmed. Give yourself permission to get a massage. You deserve it, and you will feel much better afterward. Athletes, dancers, overstressed homemakers, and busy executives have discovered the benefits of therapeutic massage for relieving stress, soothing sore muscles, and enhancing mental and emotional well-being. Invest in your health and you’ll reap benefits in mental clarity and emotional calmness. As you invest in your physical well-being, you’ll discover more energy for cultivating the spiritual side of life as well. There are many kinds of therapeutic massage available at health spas, clinics, and athletic facilities. You can also do simple self-massage at home. Refresh your feet with peppermint foot lotion, or soothe aching shoulders with a gentle hand massage.

  Three Affirmations

  I bless my dearly beloveds and release them with love.

  I listen for celestial music and look for glimpses of heaven on earth.

  God orchestrates my life, and I live in harmony and peace.

  It is not in our power to do everything we dream of doing. We must be patient and diligent and hold faithfully before our vision the ideals we serve, no matter how long it may take to accomplish them.

  —M. C. Richards

  Where do you draw the line between faith and foolishness, confidence and doubt? To admit I struggle with doubts about my own abilities—as well as my ability to create a more abundant life—is not a sign that I am faithless, though it sometimes feels that way. It is a sign that I’m still learning, that I’m even learning to ask better questions that lead me to a larger understanding and a higher consciousness. I may not know all the answers, but I’m becoming wise enough to believe that there is something within me that knows what to do and how to do it. It is wiser than I am. It is not about my control, having all the answers, and being right, but instead about surrender, trust, and copartnering with a greater Presence.

  I may not be able to heal myself instantly, lift the weight of current conditions and past poor decisions in one fell swoop, or become everything I wish I could be overnight. But I can become a partner in a greater process, learning to observe what is happening from a higher perspective. As I do that, I open myself to the possibilities of new thoughts, new concepts, and as yet unknown answers that unfold in a timetable that transcends earthly expectations. And because the timetable of my experience unfolds in earth time and space, it comes to me a step at a time—usually baby steps, not giant leaps. However, I cannot assume that the unfolding of a greater reality is limited to my past experience, either. We are talking about transcending expectations as well as meeting or missing them. Faith is practiced in the known—I know this chair will hold me, that the sun comes up every morning, that there is enough air for me to take my next breath—but it is also practiced in the unknown.

  The Larger Reality

  Wellness comes not by denying the disease but by looking at a larger reality, to an unlimited health and wholeness that lies beyond disease or cure. One can do multiple good things to align with this health and wholeness, such as drink lots of water, rest, eat right, use essential oils, get sun, take medicine, etc. As a yes to the potential for wellness in a body that naturally heals itself, these good choices can be practiced in the expectation (the faith) that they will make a positive difference. Focus on the positive outcome, yet detach from outlining how or when it will unfold. That, too, is an ongoing lesson in an evolving faith. To stay unattached to outcomes and timetables can be challenging, especially when it feels like so much is riding on the results. Have faith in the goodness of God and trust that all things work together for the highest good of all.

  Our struggles are sometimes the glory of God working through us in ways we may not understand. When the disciples asked Jesus if the man who was born blind was born that way because his parents sinned or because he sinned, he dismissed the whole question on who was “right” or sinless and who was a sinner and therefore “wrong.” He said that the infirmity was to reveal the glory of God. Jesus healed him. And then the blind man saw. (Of course, one also has to remember that the blind man got in hot water with the religious authorities because of this “unorthodox” healing. It didn’t fit with their theology and prejudices against Jesus.)

  Cultivate Inner Wisdom

  The seasons of life offer us insight as we meditate on what we learn and experience. Everything has its time and place. The harvest of youth is achievement; of middle age, perspective; and of old age, wisdom. The psalmist prays, “Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom.” Remember what the heart already knows. Learn from your experiences. Listen for the inner wisdom that is always available to you.

  Say Yes to Life

  Learn to let your yes be yes, and your no be no. Somewhere along the continuum between wholeness and brokenness, health and illness, prosperity and poverty, abundance and lack, we progress in conscious understanding through choice (of both faith and practice). As we grow in awareness, the very thing we struggle with has the potential to be the gateway to the freedom we desire. Sometimes we have to know what we don’t want before we can understand what we truly want, what we are not before we can become more fully our true selves. Say yes to life. Listen for life’s answering yes.

  Learn a Lesson from Dogs

  You’re strolling in the park. And here comes Fido, straining at the leash, sniffing and snuffling and oh so happy to be out in the fresh air. Canine enthusiasm is unlimited. Dogs love life wholeheartedly, adoringly, without reservation or judgment, greeting each new scent or sight with boundless joy and radiant, unself-conscious glee. Take note of this exuberant enthusiasm and apply it to your own attitude in life. Appreciate and receive whatever the moment offers.

  When you fail to live up to your ideals, remember that every stage of growth can be lived in integrity and have its unique challenges met. Just because a sixth-grader has only sixth-grade math skills doesn’t mean that he won’t study calculus when he is a senior in high school. A toddler repeatedly falls on the living room floor and gets up again and again. One day that toddler will be an adult, capable of climbing a mountain, running in a marathon, or just walking across the living room without falling down. The toddler is whole, perfect, and complete in the toddler stage. The sixth-grader is whole, perfect, and complete in his understanding of age-appropriate math. You are continually growing and evolving into higher stages of competency and understanding. And that includes a greater understanding of faith and integrity. It expands as you grow, taking one more step of faith in this moment, without attaching it to results. You take the next step, and it doesn’t matter whether you do it perfectly or not. What matters is that you make yourself a
vailable to the process of growth.

  There is nothing that persuades us or pushes us or forces us to create faith. Faith means tranquility, and complete tranquility is the source of our nature and existence.

  —Dainin Katagiri

  Recognize your union with God. God is good, and that good expresses in, through, and for you to produce life, health, understanding, growth, and wholeness. As consciousness expands, you will more fully express the Divine in your thoughts, actions, and experiences. You can live in a higher harmonic of serenity, abundance, and joy. Walk in faith. Affirm the good in life, and take the next step in faith. Release attachment to results, and trust that the Presence of God is with you, within you, behind and before you.

  Recognize Your Spiritual Magnificence

  Most of us do not recognize our own greatness and potential. We are filled with love, but most of us do not know it. Like a natural spring that has been overloaded with garbage that stops the water from flowing, so our lives become cluttered and blocked by the refuse of our own poor choices, as well as our poor responses to the choices of others, which have added to our burden of guilt and despair. But there is that within us that knows what to do, is greater than all our mistakes, is able to move us beyond the frustrating circumstances that seem to rule our lives.

  We can set that inner power in motion by thinking different thoughts and making new choices. It is the new choices made consciously that help us clear the clutter, remove the refuse, and open the way for the fountain of life-giving water to flow again. The water has always been available. We are the ones who closed it off with our unconscious and poor choices, and only we can open that inner spring again with better choices.

  Set your intentions for the good, aim toward wholeness and health, and you will be aligning yourself with the natural forces of the universe. This is the true meaning of being in the will of God. It is not a forced decision against our own natures, but a recognition that the harmony and order of all of creation is in tune with the love of God, and we are meant to be a part of that beautiful music. God is love, and so are you. Choose to live in that love and allow the loving nature of God to express itself in all facets of your life.

  You will discover that when you cease resisting the good and allow it to flow in your life, the very goodness and greatness of the nature of creation will respond, leading you and even carrying you in unexpected ways to ever greater good. Synchronicity, or Divine timing, will appear more frequently in your life, bringing resources, people, events, and opportunities together in ways that may sometimes feel miraculous.

  Whatever your spiritual beliefs or theological background, it is enough for now that you begin to understand that you are not alone in a cold and meaningless universe, but that you are part of a very personal yet impartial spiritual whole that includes all that is created—and all that is uncreated. You are a portal where the infinite potential of God becomes the finite reality of human experience. And as you learn to trust that Higher Power, that something greater within, you will tap into the energies of love and the pulsating harmony of the life force within.

  When you focus on and lean into that Presence of God within, you move beyond the confines of your current situation. Instead of limitation, doubt, fear, anger, and frustration, you tap into a sense of freedom and possibility. Even a feeling or an image of the vastness of eternity can help you move beyond your fears into an experience of faith and hope. Imagine a panoramic view of mountain, ocean, prairie, or any awe-inspiring landscape, then imagine that the quality of your very being is made more expansive simply by contemplating such beauty. Go out on a clear night and gaze up at the stars. Remember that you are a part of this infinite beauty and that it reflects your own nature back to you. Moving to a higher level of understanding and consciousness, you begin to move beyond the small self of fear, limitation, addiction, and old ways of thinking into a more open and receptive place.

  Using the Power within to Cultivate Peace

  There is that within us that knows what to do and how to do it. The part of us that knows is a part of the Greater Consciousness. Reaching out beyond the boundaries of time and space, we open our hearts and minds to the infinite possibilities that exist in the Mind of God. Through imagination, visualization, and choosing new thoughts and actions, we can create a new reality in our lives. There is a higher self that believes and knows more than our limited consciousness can encompass.

  You don’t have to get the power; you are the power, deeply connected to the Divine, with the essence of the Divine within. When you set an intention, you are choosing the direction you want your life to unfold, and the energies of God will flow through you in that direction. Your consciousness creates and coordinates with the infinite field of possibilities.

  When you have done what you know to do, it’s time to let a Higher Power do the rest. Let go of your agendas and stop trying to second-guess how things will come together. On this spiritual path, you are not depending on your own resources or limited understanding. You have chosen to believe that God is your Source. While you must do your best with what you know to do, it is up to God, to make it happen. Your conscious choice sets things in motion, but it is the unseen that works to pull it all together. Trust the process, knowing that all things work together for the highest good. Recognize that the unlimited Mind of God knows far more than your limited human mind. You’ll discover that the Divine orchestrates the answers to your prayers and affirmations in ways you cannot imagine or predict.

  Make a conscious choice to cultivate peace and happiness in your heart. Resolve to find reasons to rejoice rather than reasons to complain. Make gratitude a way of life. Pay attention to the simple, small, wonderful gifts the universe brings into your life every day, like hot showers, a car that runs, a job to do, friends and colleagues to see, and good food to eat. See each person as a Divine appointment to be greeted with kindness and love. Every circumstance has its mercies and small blessings. When you praise the goodness of life, you inspire faith in your heart and teach your soul to trust. Develop a habit of being thankful in the good times, so those habits of gratitude and faith will be well established when the difficult times arise.

  Each Day Is a Gift

  Accept each day—even the gloomy difficult ones—as a gift. Focus on reasons to be grateful. Your gratitude will color your attitude and help you stay focused on the infinite possibilities of grace unfolding in your life. Release your expectations, do your best, be grateful, and watch what unfolds. When you apply simple spiritual principles to the choices you make and the thoughts you think, you can create a meaningful and fulfilling life.

  Follow your heart, and it will lead you to where you need to go. The heart is wiser than the head. Though you need to pay attention to the logic of the mind, when it comes to the most important choices in life, the heart’s wisdom will guide you most surely. Value the wisdom of your body. Honor the people in your life. Be generous with your heart and offer others compassion instead of judgment, kindness instead of indifference, and encouragement instead of criticism. Love is not a commodity to be hoarded but a blessing to be shared. When you are rooted deeply in Divine Love, you have access to a boundless supply of energy, joy, hope, and peace. The more love you give away, the more returns to you and the more there is to go around.

  Prayer is a natural part of connecting to the help and wisdom that is available from a greater Source. Speaking to God naturally and trustingly, like a child confiding to a parent, is one form of prayer. Affirmative prayer takes this one step further, helping you become a cocreator with a Higher Power and take a more active role as partner in bringing forth the potential of a more expansive life. Here are three simple steps for affirmative prayer:

  State that God is the Source of all that is and that God is your Source.

  Describe what you desire as if it is already so, using the present tense. Use affirmations and statements of faith that describe what you want to create or experience.

  Be grateful righ
t now and trust that the Divine is working all things together for the highest good.

  Using affirmations in the first person, present tense, speaks to the part of our mind, the subconscious, that lives beyond time and space in the eternal here, the forever now. That part of us which is beyond time and space responds, creating a new reality in mysterious and wonderful ways that can sometimes feel like miracles. How this happens cannot be predicted, because it is the job of the eternal spiritual part of you, connected to God, to put that together. Say to yourself, “I know what. God knows how.”

  Align with Spiritual Realities

  Be fully present in the miracle of this day. Being fully present in the here and now has great liberating potential, helping you discern the real and lasting in the midst of the distracting and temporary. Thoreau wrote, “In eternity there is indeed something true and sublime. But all these times and places and occasions are now and here. God himself culminates in the present moment, and will never be more divine in the lapse of all the ages.” I believe you don’t have to travel to a mystic mountaintop or sail across the seven seas to find this treasure. I believe it is already within you and accessible in the life you already lead.

  To offer no resistance to life is to be in a state of grace, ease, and lightness. This state is then no longer dependent upon things being in a certain way, good or bad.