If Heaven Had Cheese Fries

by Stephanie Staudinger

  “It won’t happen all at once, but over time you will forget your previous life. You will still remember your time here.”

  “Whether you pass or fail is part of your destiny. Although we hope you pass.”

  The room had shrunk until it was no bigger than a college dorm room. The ladder had disappeared. One door was all that remained, and it grew so bright that it was almost blinding. I had to turn away. I looked towards Burt for guidance, but he sat unmoving.

  “Now is the moment we have all been waiting for.” The voice sounded as close as it had ever been, speaking directly into my ear.

  The faces in the glass were gone completely, and I wasn’t quite sure who ‘we’ might be. A collective gasp showed me that people were still there, although unseen.

  “You are heading to Margaret Fielder High in Iver Grove to stop a shooting at the school. It’s September 15 on earth. December 15 is the day you will fulfill your purpose.”

  I wanted to stay in that room forever, but when I extended my arms outwards, my fingertips brushed the walls in front. I knew it was time to go. I bent down to pick up Burt, but he was made of stone. I was completely and totally alone. My key fit perfectly into the locked door, swinging it open into a swirl of fall colors, scenery, and faces I didn’t recognize. I stepped forward, the room and Burt completely disappearing behind me.

  CHAPTER 8

  A strange melody filled my ears. It was quiet at first until a girl’s high-pitched and squeaky voice rang out. She was singing something about ‘left in love along the roadside.’ I couldn’t listen to that anymore. I opened my eyes and sat straight up. The song was coming from my cell phone. In one quick click, I silenced whoever she was. What an obnoxious way to wake up.

  “Where the hell am I?” Light was just beginning to pour through the window directly to my right. It was a window I didn’t recognize, covered by pale purple curtains which didn’t do a very good job of blocking the sun.

  “And so it begins.” I was in a bedroom which seemed like what the average 18-year-old high school girl would have. Everything was neatly tucked in its place, even the laundry, which was a stark contrast to my previous life.

  My previous life! I still had my memories, which was a bit of a relief, at least momentarily. I wasn’t sure how long they’d stick around.

  Abigail seemed to be very particular about things. There were hundreds of books in the corner of the room, all tucked neatly in their places. Without even approaching, I knew I would find them alphabetized.

  I was lying in what appeared to be a full-sized bed. A silky purple comforter lay on top of me. Above me, soft lights were twinkling. Abigail—no, I-- had zigzagged white Christmas lights across the ceiling. They were mesmerizing. “Go figure,” I said watching a row of them struggling to twinkle in the glow of the rising sun. No sign of a black light anywhere. Apparently those had now gone out of style for high-schoolers.

  “Oh!” I hopped out of bed almost immediately, curious to see what I looked like. I ran my hands down the side of my body and my hair. A relief. I felt the same, at least physically.

  Abigail’s room was huge. It took me a while to find her mirror, which was tucked away in her walk-in closet. Hangers filled the racks, all organized by season. Fall clothes, scarves of all colors, and long-sleeved dresses greeted me. It was definitely a more modest and exquisite taste than what I was used to.

  I squinted at my reflection. I was still myself for the most part. My hair, however, was now wavy, and a natural blonde color, not like my previous half-bleached locks. It felt so healthy as I ran my fingers through it. I looked younger. The forehead wrinkle which I recently had noticed was gone. So were the majority of the blackheads that had once dotted my nose. My face was smooth, as though I had been given a clean slate.

  I turned to the side, inspecting my new body. I quickly opened and closed my white bathrobe, not wanting to feel like a creep. I was shorter, curvier, but otherwise roughly the same, minus a few years of wear and tear.

  I tied the string on my robe and surveyed my eyes instead.

  There they were, just as they had always been, wide hazel eyes with a slight hint of gold staring back at me. It was an unsettling feeling. Everything else had changed slightly, making me recognizable as a different person. I was Abigail, but those eyes-- those eyes I recognized as being Dylan’s.

  I remembered what the voice had said. I’d eventually forget my past, but I had no idea when that would be. Would there just be a day when I’d wake up with zero recognition of who I was before? Was this reincarnation? I knew the notebook from Glen would hold all of these answers, but it remained shut. I needed to figure out my routine. I had to have a family somewhere. I also needed to know where Margaret Fielder High was.

  Somewhere in my room, a dinging noise disturbed the silence.

  I found my cell phone, nearly tripping over a white furry rug that I didn’t know was there.

  “Kitchen.” It was a text from an unknown number.

  “Glen?” No sooner I had written back than I was greeted with an error message. Great.

  I tiptoed to the door of my bedroom, placing my hand on the handle and taking a deep breath. This was as prepared as I was ever going to get especially if a notebook seemingly full of answers was going to remain shut. What was I walking into? Would a family be there to greet me, or was I completely and totally alone on a new journey?

  I had gone through many doors already, and yet this was one of the scariest.

  I cracked it open and stuck my head out. To the right was another door that was cracked open. It appeared to be a bathroom from which a soft light glowed.

  In the other direction, the hallway ended in a rather large, open concept kitchen and adjoining dining room.

  “Hello?” I called out in what I hoped passed for a normal greeting. “Mom? Dad?” No words or movement greeted me back. I wondered if I should start knocking on doors.

  I tried yelling out several more times. No one responded. The sound reverberated off the walls of what I assumed was a completely empty home.

  A clock on the hallway wall read 7:00 a.m. sharp.

  I wondered what time school was set to start. On command as usual, my phone buzzed from within the pocket of my robe.

  “School reminder: 8 a.m.,” the box read. Someone had marked it on my calendar app.

  “Thanks,” I said out loud. The bright side of no one being home was that I could talk out loud to the powers above.

  I surveyed the walls of the kitchen, which were painted a gorgeous sky blue. I saw various artwork and even pictures of who I guessed was me growing up through the years. I must have been an only child.

  A note near a bouquet of sunflowers on the kitchen island caught my attention. It definitely wasn’t from Glen or the judge. The handwriting was horrible, or written by someone who was in a rush.

  After reading the note, I realized it was the latter.

  “Honey, office called me in early. Coffee left over in the pot. Nuke a breakfast muffin from the freezer. And of course, have a great first day. Love, Dad.”

  I had a dad! I read the note again. In the corner he had drawn a picture of a smiling muffin, except it had a cherry on top.

  At least my dad had sense of a humor and he loved me. Good signs.

  “No sign of Mom, though,” I thought out loud. There had to be more family pictures somewhere, right?

  As I headed back to my room, the phone dinged again. “Get ready for school. More exploring later.”

  Guardian angels sure were useful. I wondered how long I’d get the reminders.

  What the hell was the weather like in Iver Grove? What state was I even in? I grabbed a pair of black leggings out of the bottom dresser drawer and a beige knit sweater which was oversized and comfortable. After dressing, I wondered how long it would take until I stopped feeling like I was invading a stranger’s body.

  There wasn’t much makeup left out on the vanity, so I made do with what I could find — black ey
eliner and mascara which made my lashes look huge. I blinked several times at my reflection, noticing for the first time that the usual bags under my eyes were gone. I looked refreshed, especially for someone who had just died.

  I tucked the notebook neatly in the white floral backpack that I found near the edge of my bed.

  Instinctively, I knew I’d find a lunch bag in the fridge, packed courtesy of Dad. It matched the backpack perfectly.

  A small four-door silver car in pristine condition was waiting for me in the driveway, I half expected Glen sitting in the driver seat, ready to whisk me away to an unfamiliar school.

  “Cute,” I circled around it. There was a fake sunflower on the dashboard and a bumper sticker of some brand I didn’t recognize on the back.

  The interior smelled like coconut, and a moment later I spotted an air freshener with a beach scene depicted which confirmed that. Holy crap, I hadn’t gagged. For as long as I could remember, I had gagged at the smell of coconut. Right now, it was oddly comforting.

  The GPS flicked on as soon as I backed out of the driveway, the address for the school already punched in. Heaven really had taken care of everything. I took one last look at my home. It was massive and a rich blue color. There was quite a distance between our house and the neighbors. I’d explore more later, just as the text message instructed.

  I was met with hardly any traffic as I followed the GPS. Iver Grove appeared to be a small town, and I couldn’t help but wonder if people even lived there at all. As I got closer to school, I breathed a sigh of relief that they did. I wasn’t in a ghost town. I saw real people. The name of the city itself sounded familiar. Had I heard of it before? I knew Menlo Grove was surrounded by smaller towns bearing similar names. Was I really that close to where I used to live? I made a mental note to find out just how close I was.

  The phone dinged. “Pay attention to the task at hand.”

  I rolled my eyes at the message as I pulled into the parking lot of a three-story brick building ten minutes later. My hands were shaking uncontrollably.

  Almost all of the parking spots were taken as a few students milled about. I was well aware of just how slow I was driving through the lot. I finally spotted one empty space, next to a girl sitting alone on the back of her car with her legs crossed and her nose stuck in a book.

  Thud.

  Something had hit the side of my car. I slammed on the brakes, my neck jerking forward. Shit. It was day one and I had already killed someone, sent them to the very same fate I had just lived out.

  A car zipped forward from the opposite side, taking the spot I had been eyeing. I quickly checked my front and back mirror. There was no evidence that I had run someone down.

  “Great. If I was still an adult, I would yell profanities at you,” I grumbled at the car, where a girl was getting out, hoisting her backpack over her shoulder. Thankfully, my windows were rolled up. I didn’t need to be known as the crazy person who talked to herself.

  I heard the thud again, and that time I did swear.

  There was a young guy peering into my window, rapping with his fist as he clutched a soccer ball under his other arm. Ah, the ball must have been the source of the thud.

  I rolled down the window and got a good look at him. He had to crouch quite low to be able to see through my window. Either I had a very small car, or he had very long legs. Most likely the latter.

  A letterman’s jacket with an M completely covered in medals was displayed proudly on his chest. He had a baseball cap on backwards, making it hard to decipher what color hair he had. He did have a plethora of freckles splashed across his nose and fair skin.

  Before he even opened his mouth to speak, I knew that I was about to meet one of the high school jocks.

  “I am so sorry.” He sighed dramatically, pointing at his group of friends standing behind him who were just as good-looking as he was. “Sometimes they don’t know their own strength.”

  I studied the group. I didn’t want to miss anyone or anything on day one.

  “Miss?” He had now crossed his arms and was leaning almost all the way into my vehicle, his head nearly touching the roof of my car.

  Shit, what did he say?

  “Uh yes.” I nodded, hoping that was right response. It must have been, because he flashed thumbs up and unlocked my door through the open window, plopping down in my front passenger seat.

  Jesus, what the hell had I agreed too? I put the car in park and turned to face him. He had taken off his hat and I could see had strawberry blonde hair, neatly cut. He was wearing some sort of industrial-strength gel which prevented hat hair, too.

  “It’s just towards the back. I can give you directions.” He tossed his soccer ball into my back seat and leaned back, getting comfortable, too comfortable in a stranger’s car.

  As I pulled forward, one of his friends shouted out, “My hero.” I didn’t see anything heroic happening, but I followed the guy’s directions until I found myself in another parking lot, smaller than the previous one. He instructed me to pull into one of the first spots near an entrance to the school.

  “You new here?” Letterman jacket was talking again, now leaning casually towards me.

  “Yes.” I stuck out my hand to shake his, and felt lucky when he shook. I still wasn’t sure if shaking hands was a thing that high school students even knew how to do.

  “Matt,” he said while firmly gripping my hand. He had a nice handshake.

  “Abigail.” I smiled back, hoping he wouldn’t ask me anything more.

  “Where are you from?”

  Shit. My phone buzzed in my pocket. “Excuse me.” I smiled at him as I snuck a glance. As usual, a new text message had appeared.

  “I moved here over the summer after my dad took a job at Flametech. We are from the east coast originally?”

  Matt laughed, “Was that a question or a statement?”

  Oops. I laughed too. “Sorry. First day nerves.”

  “Well, let me help you. I’m a good guy to know.” He saw me studying his medals and he took the time to gesture towards them. I had a feeling he had been waiting for me to ask. “Swimming. Literally all of them.” He broke into a wide smile. His teeth were dazzlingly white and perfect, except for a front one that was slightly crooked. “You do sports?”

  “I run?” After the words left my mouth, I cringed.

  “You sure like to answer in questions, don’t you?”

  Time to improvise. “New school. Just trying to figure out what’s cool or not.”

  He nodded as if this all made perfect sense. “Well, running is definitely cool. My buddy’s on-again-off-again girlfriend does track. Their team sleepovers are pretty rad. I’ll introduce you to--”

  His sentence was interrupted by the blaring of a horn behind us. Matt unbuckled his seatbelt and stuck his head back out the window, “Piss off, Jenna,” he yelled at the car that was angled towards us. Her windows were open. I didn’t want to make any enemies, so I rolled down my window, yelling an apology in response. I had no clue what I was even apologizing for, but it felt like the right thing to do to compensate for Matt’s potty mouth.

  “Is that necessary?” I muttered under my breath, as I turned back around and surveyed her in my mirror. I couldn’t see much of her, since half her face was hidden under oversized sunglasses despite it being an overcast day.

  Matt heard me.

  “No it’s not,” he said to me before yelling at the girl one more time. “I said, piss off, Jenna. You’re not entitled to this spot.”

  “And I’m saying fuck off, Matt,” she yelled out her driver’s side window in response. “You know this is my spot.”

  “Not today, it ain’t.” He rolled his eyes. “She’s perpetually crabby.” He excused himself from my car and a second later, he was sliding into hers.

  “Wait!” I grabbed the soccer ball he had left behind and exited my car.

  “Toss it over.” He rolled her window down all the way and extended his arms forward as if to c
atch it. At the last second, he moved his arms down and I watched in horror as the ball sailed past him, making contact with Jenna’s shoulder. Oh shit.

  She slowly took off her glasses, as if she needed a moment to collect her thoughts or squash her anger. She narrowed her green eyes at me. Her face was perfectly sculpted with features that stood out, as if they were too big on her narrow face. She was pretty, but the way her eyes were narrowed in slits made her resemble a lizard. An angry lizard.

  “Listen, lady.” She jabbed a finger at me so forcefully that Matt had to lean back in his seat to avoid losing an eye to her perfectly manicured nails.

  He was laughing, amused by the whole spectacle he had just created. What was he playing at? He leaned into Jenna, brushing her black hair back behind her ear so that he could whisper something. When he pulled away, she nodded and together they drove to a parking spot located at the opposite end of the row I was parked in.

  I hoped I wouldn’t run into them again. I did not need to be making enemies on my first day. I walked into school alone and was surprised to find Matt waiting for me on the inside of the double doors. I scurried past him, but his steps soon fell into line with mine.

  “Schedule, please?” He stuck out his hand, as if he hadn’t almost gotten me beat up in the parking lot.

  Matt clutched my schedule I’d dug out for him, reading off the pros and cons of each teacher I had listed. “You sing?” He didn’t give me a chance to answer. “Choir is a total piss-off class. Lots of people take it because there’s finals for art. No finals for choir. Plus, band babes won’t talk to anyone else.” The hallways were buzzing with my fellow students, slamming lockers and scurrying to make it into class. I knew the final bell would be going off any moment.

  “Well, I’m down here for homeroom. Looks like you have Mrs. Kaiser. Like the roll. She has rolls too, so it’s easy to remember,” Matt laughed as I cringed at his fat joke. “She’s upstairs, take a left once you get to the top of the stairs and her class is the first door.”

  “Thank you.” I took my schedule out of his hands. I noticed he had wrinkled up the sides a little. “I appreciate it.”