Proxy War

by Adam Sampson

  They walked towards a building in the center of the complex, one that was shorter and stouter than the rest of the ones they had been passing. It was separated from the rest of the complex by several open fields, where people were already up and training. Just as they walked into this open space, Rex turned and looked at his group.

  “But first, before we get there, we need to get you guys suited up and your kit assigned,” Rex said before abruptly turning and heading off in a different direction.

  Their new destination had a needle and thread on the door and Peter surmised correctly that this is where they would be fitted with uniforms.

  There was a small line of people ahead of them, with Lauren from yesterday standing off to the side.

  “I thought I was going to have the last squad in here today, but then you showed up Rex,” Lauren said.

  “They always save the best for last, Lauren,” Rex said with a smile.

  Lauren just snorted and turned back to her group.

  Rex turned to his group and told them, “Alrighty, once you get to the front of the line they will scan you and get your measurements. They will load the info to your cuff, no need to write anything down. Once you get scanned, go back to the Quartermaster and take everything he gives you. We will wait just outside until everyone is kitted up and go back to our rooms to change.”

  The line moved fairly quickly. When it was Peter’s turn he stepped up on a round platform and a red light swept over him. Peter looked down and tried to see if this was alien technology or human. He couldn’t tell for sure, but it looked human to him. After a second his cuff buzzed and he gathered that meant he was done. He followed the people in front of him to the next room. The quartermaster stood at the counter, two assistants running back and forth to assemble a kit for each recruit. He was tall and wide, his assistants accentuating his size with their diminutive stature.

  “Waive your cuff here, then stand over there,” the quartermaster said. He seemed bored, but professional.

  Peter stood to the side of the counter as the assistant brought everyone their supplies. First a large black duffle bag they used to store the rest of their gear. Everyone got two of the green uniforms, four sets of underwear and socks, pajamas, a pair of shoes, a pair of boots, a bag of toiletries, a canteen, a harness, and a helmet.

  Once everyone had their full kit Rex stepped up and said, “Ok folks, back to your room. We will change and store the stuff we don’t need right now. Off to the barracks!” He threw up his hand as if he was leading a charge into battle. His group eyed him wearily and followed.

  In short order, they were back at their room. The barracks were mostly deserted at this point, with only a few people cleaning up the cafeteria.

  “Ok, you will find that modesty and privacy is something that you have to leave on Earth. As soldiers, modesty isn’t something you have time for, so most of us don’t bother with it. But no need to jump into the deep end just yet. Ladies change first. Put everything extra in your footlocker, including the clothing you are wearing now. Once you are in your uniform put the harness on and come on out,” Rex said.

  Standing in the hallway was awkward for most of the men. This was the first time they had really thought of their fellow recruits as women. As they stood there, they couldn’t help but think of the women getting undressed in the room they shared. None here had ever had a female roommate before, and they split their thoughts between imagining what was going on behind the door, and the social realities of working with someone of the opposite gender. Frank was unaffected.

  Before too long, the women were ready and they came out all at once. The uniforms fit each of them well, thick fabric and obviously cut to hide the female form. This helped alleviate some earlier awkwardness.

  Then the men took their turn getting dressed. Peter used the locker room method of getting dressed, pretending no one else was around and getting changed as quick as humanly possible. The boxer briefs felt normal, but the uniform was something else. The thick fabric looked tough and stiff like canvas but felt luxuriously soft. It didn’t bunch or wear funny, no matter how Peter moved. He decided he liked it. He donned his harness, glad it was not more complicated. One click and it was on. The harness had several straps and metal sections used to secure things. He quickly stored the rest of his kit and his clothing away in his footlocker and stood near the door, waiting for the rest of the men to get changed. It surprised no one that Frank was last, each of his moves slow and deliberate.

  Once Frank was done they walked out of the room and Rex led them back towards the armory. They walked by all the same buildings as before and Peter wondered if there might have been a more efficient path to getting everything done this morning.

  Peter felt Lola’s presence next to him. After changing, he saw her in a different light, suddenly attractive despite the shapeless uniform. Her long red hair was shining and beautiful and her hands dainty and soft. Peter absentmindedly walked closer to her, and she turned towards him, wondering if he had something to say.

  Thinking quickly, Peter said, “These uniforms are something else, huh?” Clothing? That is the best I could come up with, talking about clothing?

  Luckily Lola brightened at his question and said, “Yeah they have pockets! I love pockets, girl’s clothing never has pockets.” She stuck her hands in the pockets and swayed around. She continued, “And that is not all. Rex was telling us about them while you guys were getting changed. The fabric is smart fabric from an alien race, not the trolls. That is why it is so comfortable. It acts like rudimentary armor and can self repair small tears. Isn’t that awesome?”

  “Whoa, that is great,” Peter said, with a newfound appreciation for his uniform.

  “That isn’t even the weirdest part. This fabric, the uniform, is almost alive and it eats our sweat and dead skin. So it cleans us and keeps us smelling fresh when we wear it. I am never taking it off,” Lola said and did a little twirl.

  Peter was less enthused. He certainly liked being clean but was less comfortable wearing clothing that was slowly eating him.

  The buildings fell away as their group walked into the open area in front of the armory. As they passed the fields they could see the rest of the group from yesterday already out practicing with their trainers. Each of them had a weapon and they were either moving through various forms together as a group or attacking wooden structures in waves.

  This building was different from any other one in the complex. It had deep, thick concrete walls, angled like a rhombus. The windows and doors were deeply recessed. Peter wouldn’t be surprised if it could withstand a missile strike or two. As they got close, Rex nodded at a guard just outside the door and slid his cuff across a featureless box next to the guard. A moment later and the light above the door blinked green.

  The guard turned to Rex and said, “I see you cuffed some more slaves, Rex. The trolls must be proud.”

  “Shut up Dave before I make you,” Rex replied with a scowl.

  Rex pulled the large metal door open and waved his team into a small windowless room with one more door opposite. He waited until everyone was in the room and pulled the first door shut.

  What was that business with the guard all about? Peter wondered.

  They stood there silently for a second before a red scanning beam scanned the entire room. After it finished, the other door blinked green.

  “Where exactly are you taking us, Rex? Fort Knox?” Frank said.

  “Hah, I wish. We will not see the good stuff today, but the armory holds all the weapons. They keep all the best enchanted goodies and the base defenses here,” Rex replied.

  “Enchanted?” Frank said. Rex just ignored him and led the group into the armory interior. They were in a large lobby, and many rooms lined the walls. The interior was gray and white, but some doors were a splash of color, each one a solid color, red, blue, green, gold and purple. There was a man at a desk in the room's middle, looking like a cross between an information booth and a securit
y station. Rex ignored him and led them directly to a white door.

  They walked into a simple room with a long white counter cutting across it. There was a young man a blue uniform leaning against the counter. Behind him hung weapons on hooks, a wide variety but most of them plain and without adornment.

  Rex smiled and walked up to the young man and said, “Howdy Matt. How is it going?”

  “Just fine Rex,” Matt replied.

  “Did you get rid of all the boring crap yet?” Rex asked.

  Matt smiled and said, “Well you are the last ones to gear up, and since this group is bigger than last month’s crop, we might have to supply some less boring equipment.”

  Rex smiled and said, “Do tell.”

  “Yep, but first, let’s get the boring stuff sorted out first. Gerbers for everyone,” Matt said and brought a crate out from behind the counter and set it on the counter with a thunk.

  Gerbers turned out to be a basic combat knife, and everyone got assigned one with a sheath that affixed to their harness. Matt and Rex went around the group, helping them affix their knife sheath to their harness, and adjusting their harness so it fit right.

  Next came shields. They were small round bucklers that fit snugly on their left arm with two leather straps. It also affixed to their back via magnets in their harness, but not directly in the middle so it was easy to take off with one hand. Only eight of them got a shield. The shields seemed strong but very light.

  “These are great, how come we didn’t get shields yesterday?” Lola said as she swung around her shield.

  “Because the Trolls...,” Matt swore fluently for a moment, “They only take survivors after a lot of deaths.”

  “Oh,” a much more subdued Lola said.

  Matt turned to the remaining four shieldless recruits. “Don’t worry, I haven’t forgotten about you. You guys get biters,” he said with a smile.

  Matt pulled out slightly smaller shields and handed them out. The four, Peter, Dima, Simon, and Chris, each got an unusual contraption. It was like a triangle shield that had the bottom tip cut off and replaced with two small points. It looked like a metal gauntlet had been welded to the back instead of straps. Their left forearm fully inserted into the shield and their hand gripped an unseen bar where the gauntlet fist was. In other ways, it was similar to the other shields, tough but rather light.

  Simon and Chris were pleased with how cool the shields looked, waving them around and striking poses. Peter and Dima were less impressed, the shields may look cool, but their design made them less maneuverable, not to mention they covered slightly less area.

  Peter was about to ask one of the other recruits if they wanted to trade, but then he heard a schink behind him and Dima laughed maniacally.

  Dima was now holding a fully triangular shield, the two points had grown and met like two scissor blades. Another schink sound and the shield was back to normal.

  “How..” began Peter, but simultaneous schink sounds interrupted his question and Simon and Chris laughed maniacally too.

  Peter looked at his shield. There was no button, no moving parts at all. The only thing he could even grab was... the bar in the fist! He gripped it hard and ... schink! Peter laughed too, trying not to sound to maniacal. He released the bar and the points shrunk back into the shield.

  Now that he knew what to look for, he could see that the points were razor-sharp, large blades housed in the body of the shield. This shield could do some serious damage. Peter could see several in the group looking at his shield in envy.

  Once their laughter died down, Matt stepped forward and said, “You lucky few have gotten a shield of my own design, what I call a biter. You can stab the end into a zergling and trigger the teeth, and cut out a chunk of flesh. If you catch a limb on the end, snip snip and the zergling is down to five legs. Don’t use the teeth here on base, only out on the field. We don’t want humans to lose a limb, only zerglings.”

  “Tell them the other reason they can’t use it on base, Matt,” said Rex.

  Matt gave him a look and said to the group, “The wise and wonderful leaders don’t like it when I produce my own weapons. Their weapons may be boring, but they always work. I don’t have thousands of years of research, so sometimes my weapons break. But who cares if a biter breaks? If the blades get broken, it is still a shield, isn’t it?” Matt sighed and continued, “So anyway, don’t use them on base because they will confiscate them and give you guys the boring versions.”

  After the talk of the biters breaking, the rest of the group was far less jealous of the four that had the experimental shields. A few even shied away when they got too close.

  “On to the good stuff then,” Matt said and pulled out weapons from behind the counter. One-handed spears, swords, a war hammer, mace, poleaxe, a spear with a dagger sticking out the side, a wide sword. “All of you, pick a weapon. Try to choose something you are comfortable with since you will have this one for a while. Please ask me and Rex questions so you know it will fit your style. Pick them up, but do not swing them around!” That last part was said as if Matt had had too much experience with people ignoring this warning.

  The 12 recruits slowly walked up to the counter and perused the options. Yoon picked up the spear with the dagger sticking out the side of the top and asked Matt softly, “Will this be a good weapon to use one-handed? I am not sure I can easily control it and my shield.”

  “That is a good question, you are holding a Ji, which is an ancient Japanese weapon. They used it without a shield, but most of the soldiers here can wield it one-handed. The cuff allows techniques that regular humans couldn’t. If you feel comfortable using a Ji, I wouldn’t worry about the addition of the shield,” Matt said.

  Peter was next, he picked up the wide sword asked, “Is this better for slashing or stabbing?”

  “That is a gladius, and the ancient Romans used them for the main sword of their foot soldiers, so it can do whatever you need it to. But when you are hunting zerglings you will mostly stab them,” Matt replied.

  Peter put the gladius back down and looked at the other options as Matt answered other questions. He ended up picking up a warhammer since it was what he was used to from yesterday. This one was slightly different. The hammer head had four spikes instead of a flat surface, and a long spike on the other end. It was topped with a long spike, so it could be used as a spear too. It had an all-metal shaft like most of the weapons here, but the grip was leather and comfortable.

  Matt wandered back and said to Peter, “That is a good choice, it is a lucerne hammer, something designed for war unlike some of the other weapons here. Lots of ways to kill things with that one.”

  “Thanks, I think I will keep it,” said Peter.

  Once everyone had selected their weapons, Matt and Rex showed them how to attach them to their harness. Each weapon attached with magnets and then straps. Matt explained that the straps were for when they were running around, but when they were even close to the enemy they could undo the straps and have quick access to their shields and weapons.

  “Ok, I have one question before you go. Raise your hand if you know who Joerg Sprave is,” said Matt.

  Two hands went up. Lola and then Jonas. “Oh the lady was first,” said Matt, “Ok, miss; who is Joerg?”

  “He is this German guy, he makes all kinds of wicked slingshots in his backyard. They are deadly.”

  “Right you are. And as your trivia prize, you get a Joerg designed slingshot,” Matt said as he handed over the slingshot. It was a large slingshot with a brace for the forearm and some sort of metal instead of rubber tubing. “If you train long enough, you should be able to one-shot zerglings with this baby.”

  Lola seemed happy with the slingshot, but most of the group wasn’t jealous, it just looked like a child’s toy.

  “Thanks Matt, excellent work as always,” Rex said. He leaned closer and said quietly, “Oh, could I also get a Glock?”

  “No!” Matt said vehemently. He backed away from R
ex with his hands out and said, “No way! You are not getting me in trouble with that shit again.”

  “Whoa, I was just asking,” Rex said, palms out trying to placate Matt.

  Matt turned to the rest of the group to see their confused looks and said, “Don’t think I am overreacting, Rex is trying to be an idiot. You see, your fearless leader likes object lessons. Someone always, always asks why we aren’t using guns. ‘We are in the 21st century, why are we using ancient weapons instead of guns?’ They ask. And instead of just telling his soldiers why, this shit for brains has to show them why we don’t use guns.”

  Matt was getting into the swing of things as he continued, “Rex knows we keep some Glocks on hand from when they get confiscated from new recruits, so he borrowed one last month. He goes out into the field with his squads of freshies and empties a clip into a zergling. Of course, all the bullets bounce off the zergling’s hide and they have to kill it the old fashioned way. Rex here is all happy, lesson learned that his freshies won’t soon forget. But what this hole-in-the-head trainer failed to consider is that guns are damn loud. He had zerglings from miles around coming straight for his batch of fresh meat. Rex had to kill maybe twenty of them as they ran back to base, and still had twelve zerglings on his tail that the fence had to finish off.”

  “It was only ten on the way back,” said Rex.

  “Only ten, well then nevermind. I almost got demoted from your antics. I don’t know why you aren’t back in the field right now,” Matt replied.

  Rex smiled and spread his hands, “What can I say, they need me here.”

  “They need you out there,” Matt replied and waved them out of the room.

  “Thanks anyway for your help Matt, I really appreciate it,” said Rex.

  “Whatever,” Matt said, his anger from earlier deflated.

  Rex’s group secured their weapons to their harness and walked out of the room. The wait in the small airlock room was quiet. Many of them were wondering what kind of leader they had been saddled with.