Just the Tip (DTF (Dirty. Tough. Female) Book 4)

by Kat Addams

Friends with benefits would understand small nuisances like a dreadlocked vag. Hell, I was too busy growing his baby to fuss with things like shaving, eyebrow plucking, or buying panties that fit. I’d been going commando for eight weeks now. If Aiden didn’t want to make his way through this jungle, he could sit out and watch whatever wild kink he’d been watching the other day instead.

  I blew out a breath and began fumbling with the mop on my head. Now, I understood the mom cut. Besides getting a full-blown bikini wax, there was nothing I wanted to do more than chop my hair off right now. It seemed to grow along with my belly, racing against my bump like this was some type of competition. It hung almost to my waist and was as voluminous and shiny as ever—the only positive pregnancy symptom. Oh, and the bigger boobs had been a pleasant surprise too.

  I hurried out of the shower and dried myself off as quickly as I could. Aiden had texted that he was already on his way before I made it to the bathroom to freshen up. When I caught sight of myself in the mirror, I knew my makeover would take a while. I’d spent the week cramming for exams while slinging out tacos. By the time the weekend had come, I had looked like a bear and smelled like one too.

  All morning, I’d sat on my ass, doing nothing but eating cookies and getting all fat and sassy. My back ached, my feet were swollen, and pregnancy brain had me lost in a fog. Not to mention, I’d had a new crazy hormone pop up—the raging bitch hormone. I’d snapped at Betty last week and shocked us both into silence. Silence with Betty never happened.

  I always considered myself somewhat of a hot mess, but pregnant Layla took the cake. Literally. I’d bought one of those big sheet cakes from the store a few days ago and sat down, propping it on my belly and eating it straight out of the box. There wasn’t a crumb left after two days.

  My doorbell rang as I sloppily brushed my teeth and threw my hair up in a towel. I slipped on my new maternity swimsuit under yet another muumuu. I dared Aiden to make any comment on my appearance, especially after my raging-bitch alter ego was triggered. But that wasn’t like Aiden to critique me. Or anyone. Both Aiden and his brother had a way with words that the American men I’d dated didn’t have. Aiden could tell me I smelled like a dog turd, cooking in the summer heat, with his smooth accent, and I would still feel like a million bucks. Except he would never say such a thing. He was a perfect gentleman, just like Jay.

  I never heard anything negative come out of Aiden’s mouth, and that was one of the big reasons we got along so well. Nikki would say there was enough negative energy in the world, and I agreed.

  I waddled to my front door, ready for grilling and chilling with my baby daddy—and hopefully, later, maybe even some of those good old-fashioned horizontal tango lessons. I took the towel off my head and threw it into the laundry as I passed by the basket that had been lying on my floor for weeks. I couldn’t bend over to pick it up anymore. These days, I lazily kicked it from my bedroom to the laundry room, and even that had begun to be too much effort.

  “Ah! There is the ravishing mother of my child! You look like you just stepped out of Hollywood.” Aiden leaned in and kissed me on the forehead. “Steaks and pee veggies. Also, jelly doughnuts.” He held up the bags of loot in his hands.

  Unf. I grabbed my stomach.

  “She knows her daddy’s voice.” I cringed, rubbing my belly. “Wow. Just wow.”

  He put his lips to my stomach, talking loudly, “Does she now? Hello, peanut! Giving your poor mum a hard time already, are ya?”

  It could have been worse. He could have tried speaking to her through another route.

  I squeezed my knees together.

  “Come in.” I stepped aside, letting him pass.

  “Ahh, smells like flowers in here. It always does. You are a ray of sunshine in a field of wildflowers. You bring that scent with you wherever you go. Sunshine.” He followed me to the kitchen and set the food on the counter.

  I pulled the box of doughnuts toward me and began to stuff my face.

  “Ray of sunshine? My hair is a mop, I can only fit into a muumuu, and”—I swallowed hard, smacking my lips—“I am as big as a whale. What’s even worse is, I don’t care!” I traced my tongue along my lips and under my nose, licking the powdered sugar that clung to me. After inhaling that doughnut, I probably looked like I’d snorted a line or two of coke, but my pregnant brain gave no fucks. I reached for another.

  “You’re glowing. Don’t be silly! Now, tell me about this pediatrician, so we can relax by the pool. Let’s get business out of the way. How are you feeling? What’s going on? Any new symptoms? Pediatrician okay? These are straight from Scarlett Herb, by the way.” He nodded at the steaks, redder than a fresh paper cut.

  My mouth watered.

  “Besides these crazy cravings, not much. Same hormonal issues. I just feel like shit. I’m too big to move. I’m hungry all the time, but I have no room to eat. Celeste and Deb are betting I won’t make it to forty weeks. Baby measurements are perfect, so there’s nothing wrong there,” I assured him. “She’s just growing so fast that she’ll be ready before I’m ready. And probably before you’re ready. But then again, is anyone ever ready for a baby?”

  “Not in my experience. Or, I mean, not that I know of.” He cleared his throat. “Can I make myself at home in your kitchen? Just point me to the utensils, oils, spices, and sheet pans.”

  I nodded, pointing to several cabinets.

  “Anyway, our pediatrician’s name is Dr. Gail. She’s amazing. She’s also a lactation consultant, so if I have any problems with breastfeeding, she can help with that. She made me feel at ease. Just like the rest of the labor and delivery crew. Which is another thing we need to talk about. Birth plan. And names. And custody.” I groaned as Aiden busied himself with preparing our meal.

  “Wait. Custody?” His face fell flat. “What do you mean?”

  “Well, we’re not married. So, how will we split the time? Don’t you think we should have a lawyer involved? I know that can get messy, but it’s probably the smart thing to do. Just in case.”

  “In case of what? You don’t want me to see our child? I don’t understand.” He stopped rummaging through my cabinet and pulled a chair right in front of me, sitting down and leaning over my knees. “Talk to me. Is something on your mind?”

  I caught sight of his hands trembling before he tucked them under his butt.

  “It was just a thought. We don’t have to talk about it now. Let’s wait. We still have time.”

  I had been thinking about a custody arrangement for a few weeks now, but I’d had no idea how to broach the subject. I figured a smart businessman such as himself knew the value of legal agreements.

  “You can tell me if there’s something you want to talk about. I can handle it.” He swallowed hard.

  “Aiden, please. I didn’t think this through. Let’s discuss that later. I’m sorry I brought it up. I just thought—look, I do that sometimes. Say things at the wrong time. I didn’t know it would be a sensitive subject. Since we’re friends and all.” I heaved myself forward in an attempt to reach his legs and give them a reassuring squeeze, but my belly wouldn’t let me out of the chair. I gave up, leaning back in exhaustion.

  “Layla, there’s something I need to tell you. But I’m not sure how to say it. Can we talk about serious stuff later? Maybe get this food on the grill, paddle around in the pool, and circle back to this conversation. I, um … brought something to try that might help me spit out what I need to say. It’s from the local CBD store beside the new restaurant. They gave me this.” He pulled out the bag of medicinal herbs from the pack of food he’d brought inside.

  “You’re going to blaze a doobie?” My eyes grew wide.

  “It’s not a doobie. He swore it’s only CBD. No THC in it. So, I’ll get the calming effect without the high. Supposedly. Anyway, I thought it was good business sense to try it out. He’s my neighbor after all, and the students seem to love that stuff. I’m thinking about baking it into a dessert edible.” He opened the bag an
d sniffed.

  “Aiden, the owner of the pretentious Scarlett Herb, is toking a joint tonight.” I laughed.

  “I have no idea what you just said, but I’d like to try it. I want to do it while I’m here in case I die. Then, you can call the ambulance for me. What else are—”

  “Friends for,” I muttered. “Sure. I’ll observe you during your little experiment. Let’s get in that pool though. I’m sweating like a whore in church.” I tugged at my collar, fanning my muumuu out from my sticky skin.

  “Right. Got my bathers in here too!” He held up a banana hammock. There was no way his stovepipe penis would fit in that.

  “Bathers? Aussie term for Speedo?” I asked, staring at the little white cloth he held up in front of me.

  “Aye, mate. I swim for speed. I can’t have baggy trunks weighing me down. I’ll go change and meet you outside.” He cocked his head to the side. “Are you naked under there? Or do you have bathers too?”

  “I have a maternity bather. Why? Think you get to swim in the nude with the whales today?” I became suddenly aware that my busted-can-of-biscuits ass would soon be swimming next to a man with washboard abs and pecs that stuck out like boulders.

  “Hush you. You’ll be like Aphrodite emerging from the water. I’d love to see you in the flesh again,” he said, disappearing into the bathroom down the hall.

  I rushed out my back door, threw off my muumuu, and sank into the pool before he came out back.

  Aphrodite my ass.

  My belly stuck out like a torpedo on a submarine. Ready. Set. Fire.

  I waded around, shivering until my body warmed to the temperature of the water. I grabbed one of those neon noodles and leaned back, exposing little miss to the sunshine and fresh air. She calmed whenever I submerged myself in water. It didn’t matter if I swam in the pool, stood under the shower, or sank into the bathtub; my daughter loved the water just as much as I did. I turned my face toward the sun and closed my eyes. The weightlessness of the water eased the aches I had been feeling all week.

  “Don’t you look happy?” Aiden called from the steps.

  I jerked my eyes open, staring at his package. I couldn’t help it. My gaze quickly skimmed over his rippled chest and landed right there, smack dab at that python bulging out of his bathers.

  “I think your panties are strangling your peter,” I called before biting my lip. I had the sudden urge to paddle over to him and unleash his kraken.

  “It’s knickers, and it’s Thomas! Not Peter. We went through this. I think you’re right though. I don’t remember them being this small. Can an adult man’s penis grow?” He scratched his head, slowly lowering himself into the water before grabbing another noodle and floating toward me.

  “I don’t know. I know nothing about the scientific workings of the ding-dong. I’ve seen pills online that are supposed to make your dick grow, but I’m not sure if that is bullshit or not. I don’t see how that would work! Every man would be on those pills. Can you imagine if it did work and some man grew a never-ending penis?”

  “Can’t say I’ve ever imagined that. You really don’t know how our dicks work though? I know all about the vulva, the clitoris, the cervix—”

  “Wait. Did you say vulva? Have you been studying anatomy or something?” I asked.

  “Or something.” He shrugged, paddling back and forth, avoiding my gaze. “I should have at least turned the grill on. Be right back.”

  I watched him as he high-stepped across the hot concrete. If he flopped around anymore, ol’ Tom would flop right out with him. I kind of hoped he would.

  “New dance move?” I called out after him.

  “You can say that. Though I prefer our dance moves.” He turned the knob on the propane tank and pressed start on the grill.

  The flumph sound it made reminded me of what happened to my body when Aiden touched me. When he put his hands on me, my body ignited in the same way.

  Flumph.

  We floated around in the stifling heat, laughing about how we’d met only a year ago. I’d walked into his restaurant and shown him how to make Shizzle Sauce, and after a few months, he’d given me his own sauce. Now, here we were, expecting a baby girl while navigating the boundaries of our friendship. I had no idea what kind of talks he had in mind for me later, but I suspected it had something to do with halting our flirty behavior or ramping it up. Last time, he’d mentioned having feelings for me outside of our friendliness. Maybe something had changed.

  I pushed the drama into the back of my mind and enjoyed my day with Aiden. If this was our last friendly date, I wanted to appreciate every moment of it. Who knew how long it would be before I could enjoy the company of another man again? I would have my hands full with my daughter, and that was okay by me. I’d always wanted to be a mom, just not this way. But this was the curveball life had thrown at me, and I could handle it.

  I think.

  Visions of diapers and colic danced through my mind.

  “Have you ever changed a diaper before?” I asked, stepping outside of the pool and quickly grabbing a towel. The scent of grilled steak had lured me out from the water and toward the patio table, where Aiden had already set our places.

  We’d lost track of time in the pool, babbling on about life. By the time we’d remembered the heated grill, an hour had already passed.

  “No. Can’t say I have. That will be a new experience. I don’t have much experience with babies at all.” His eyes shifted to the house. “Be right back. Let me get my after-dinner treats. Stay there.”

  I took a sip of water and stared at my bloody steak.

  “You mean, you didn’t have to take care of Jay much? Help your mom out?” I asked when he sat back down.

  “Oh, no. Mum did everything herself. She was the definition of a superwoman.” He nodded toward my plate. “Dig in.”

  No one had to ask me twice to eat these days.

  I lifted a forkful of meat to my mouth and groaned before prodding him for more information. I never broached the subject of Aiden’s parents. I didn’t know how rough it would be for him to recall their memory. If I lost my parents, I would be devastated. I couldn’t imagine the pain he must have felt and probably still struggled with.

  “Tell me about your mom.”

  “Well, these steaks we are eating, she taught me how to grill them just like this. The perfect sear and the perfect seasoning. That was all her. She was a master on the barbie. I think even my dear old dad was jealous of that skill she had.” He smiled. His entire face lit up when he spoke of her.

  “Thank God for that! It’s delicious.” I took another bite. “Tell me more.”

  “Well, you know she was from here. She always joked that Dad had to travel all the way here to find a mate,” he said between mouthfuls.

  Mate.

  “Mate as in friends?” I asked.

  “Mate as in soul mate. Honestly, Jay and Rox remind me of them a bit.” He pushed his food around on his plate. “But anyway, my mum was my everything. She raised us well. I have no complaints from my childhood. Only warm memories.”

  “She sounds like an amazing woman. Did she want grandkids? I wish she could have met this little girl.” I rubbed my belly, moaning. I could only finish half of my steak and eat two asparagus spears before my stomach became stuffed.

  “Aye, she did.” He grabbed the CBD joints from the table and fumbled with the bag. “All right, let’s see if these make for a calming after-dinner dessert. The man who sold them told me the fat one is stronger, and the skinny one isn’t. Or vice versa. Shit.”

  He scratched his head, peering down at the joints before grabbing one.

  “Oi. I don’t even have a lighter,” he said.

  “Matches are in the kitchen drawer to the left of the stove.” I watched him walk away, still in his bathers.

  I’d never seen a man with a bubble butt before, but Aiden had the perfect badonkadonk. Anytime he came around, I fought the urge to squeeze it. But like a good friend, I kept
my hands to myself. Mostly. But now, after he said whatever he was going to say, maybe I would have free rein to touch him however I wanted. Or not.

  “Uh, I’m going to go over here. I don’t want you around the smoke.” He came back, pointing to the other side of the patio.

  “Okay.” I nodded, amused.

  Aiden came off stiffer than stiff. Seeing him smoking anything would be weird. But I guessed if this experiment was in the name of research for his new business, I’d support him. Besides, so many art students in my classes swore by CBD oils or joints or whatever it was. I didn’t know much about it myself. I had come from a sheltered life and had always been oblivious to anything going on around me.

  Aiden slid the joint between his lips and lit it. He inhaled deeply, held it, and then let it out.

  “How did you know to do that? You look like a pro!” I laughed.

  “YouTube.” He coughed. “Definitely not a pro.”

  He took another drag, widening his eyes.

  “This bad-boy vibe is kind of sexy. Like, really sexy.” I raised my brows.

  Aiden leaned against the wall, propping one leg up. “Sexy like this?” he asked, posing before taking another drag off the joint. “Or like this.” He turned around, popping his bubble butt out and throwing a wink over his shoulder.

  I clutched my stomach, laughing. Baby girl jolted awake, kicking in response.

  “Aiden, I think you must have picked the strong doobie to light up.”

  “I am feeling a bit … loose.” He pulled at his face, contorting it into a shape I couldn’t quite describe.

  I laughed harder, feeling a tiny tinkle dribble down my leg.

  Fuck. Just another wonderful pregnancy symptom.

  Anytime I sneezed, giggled, or pooted, there was a slight chance I would pee a little. And without underwear that fit me these days, it wasn’t fun. No one had told me the ugly side of pregnancy. Day by day, I experienced some strange new ailment. When I’d looked in the mirror yesterday, I could have sworn my nose had grown.

  “I’ll be right back!” I cried, waddling inside.

  I used the bathroom and cleaned myself up before changing into—you guessed it—another muumuu. When I came back outside, Aiden had scooted a chair to the other side of the patio and was sitting, man-spreading with half of one of his balls hanging out of his too-tight Speedos.