Tom Collivander and the Order of the Thunderbird, A Potter Parody

by Jonathan Lockwood

  Chapter 10 – The magic of Christmas

  The run up to Christmas went by very quickly and before he knew it he was going to sleep on Christmas Eve. He woke up on Christmas morning to find a stack of presents on his bedside table, along with a fresh blanket of snow draping the grounds, which made them even more beautiful. Excitedly, he reached over and started unwrapping his first gift, which was from his uncle Garrick. It was a new wand. There was a note telling him that whilst his current wand worked well, with his new life experiences he needed this new one, which would be much more powerful. It was 14 inches, made of oak with a dragon heartstring core.

  Tom spent the next 10 minutes practising a large variety of spells to see how the new wand differed from his previous. He even intentionally broke some things so he could repair them. Fixing things was his forte. His spells were indeed more powerful and effective but more than that, the feeling the new wand gave him was the biggest difference. His old wand felt like a wand. A piece of wood in his hand. This new one however, felt like an extension of his arm. It felt completely natural and weightless. He felt complete when holding it.

  After revelling at the enormity of his uncle’s gift (it was useful being related to a wand maker), he averted his attention back to his other presents. They contained a set of headphones from Hermione, a sneaker scope from Harry and a note saying it was for helping him with Cho. A special beater bat from Mark and Ryan, some dragon shaped cookies from Hogrod, a Meat Loaf album called ‘Bat out of Hell’ from Amber and, to his surprise, a box of chocolates from Isabelle. He hadn’t thought to get her anything. He felt bad for not getting her anything but then cheered himself up by testing out his new headphones with the new music. As he listened to ‘Bat out of Hell’, he wondered what the reactions were from all the people he’d got presents for.

  In the Ravensnore common room, the few kids that were left were all milling around, exchanging gifts, laughing and singing. Christmas really brings people together. Tom gave a passing greeting to anyone that looked at him and then left the common room to go down to the hall for Christmas lunch. He got 2 steps out the doorway, when his phone started to ring. It was Amber. Cheerily, he said, “Merry Christmas Amber. You got my present then?”

  “HELLO! CAN YOU HEAR ME? TOM? TOM?”

  “Ow. You don’t need to shout Amber. Just speak normally and I’ll hear you fine.”

  “Sorry Tom. I’m just not used to this at all. It’s taken me all morning to go through the instructions to find out how to call you.”

  Tom laughed to himself. He enjoyed laughing at how people found technology so difficult when it was so simple. “I can teach you properly when you’re back at Hogwash,” he said whilst rolling his eyes.

  “Thanks Tom. I can’t wait to get back to be honest. I’m missing the dynamism of Hogwash, Quidditch and of course, you.”

  Tom blushed, thankfully no one was around to see it. “Well you’ve got a phone now so we can still talk and text when we are apart.”

  “What’s a text?”

  “Haha, maybe not then. I’ll show you when you get back. Anyway, thanks for the music.”

  “Is it the right thing? I know you like that type of music but I don’t know anything about it. I had to get one of my muggle born friends to help me out. She said she didn’t notice you playing any Meat Loaf at the victory party.”

  “Yeah, it’s great. She was right about me not having much by him. You did a good job.”

  “Oh good… Funny name for a person though.”

  “I suppose. I’d never really thought about it. But then you like that band, the sly sphinxes.”

  Before Amber had a chance to reply, Ryan came round the corner, “There you are Tom. Where have you been?”

  “Hold on a second Ryan. Amber, are you still there?”

  “Yes.”

  “Listen, I’ve got to go. Have a good Christmas.”

  “Ok, Bye.”

  Ryan looked bewildered. “What was that?”

  “Oh, I gave Amber a phone for Christmas so we can talk whenever.”

  “That’s a bit forward mate. You must really be into her.”

  “It just makes sense for her to have one. Muggles use phones all the time. It’s no big deal. You should get one.”

  “Nah, it’s not for me. When I want to talk to someone, I want to be next to them.”

  “Suit yourself. Thanks for the bat by the way. It looks quality.”

  Ryan suddenly got very excited. “It is. I’m telling you, with the way you play, you can’t be making do with a school bat. Mark and I agreed you need a proper tool to cause maximum damage.”

  “Well, thanks, it looks awesome.”

  “Likewise for the keeper gloves. Funny how we got each other Quidditch stuff. We must both really want that Quidditch cup huh?”

  “Definitely. But enough of this, let’s get some good food in us.”

  “Agreed.”

  They entered the great hall to a tumultuous array of colours and sounds. A bunch of incredibly large Christmas trees had appeared to accompany the decorations that Professor Funwick had set up. 4 of the tables had been removed to leave just 1 where students and teachers were sitting with each other. There was much chatter and laughing and crackers were being pulled left, right and centre. These crackers let off explosions that sounded like gun shots, produced multi-coloured smoke and contained items such as ever-lasting quills and toy snitches.

  Tom spotted a couple of empty seats next to Hogrod so dragged Ryan over to him. “Mind if we join you?” Tom said, though he’d already started to sit down.

  “Not at all. Not at all. Who’s your friend here?” Hogrod appeared in a much better mood since last they met.

  “This is Ryan, he’s on the Ravensnore Quidditch team with me, keeper. He’s in final year.”

  Ryan then spoke up, “Professor Hogrod, you won’t know me because you became a teacher after I’d dropped care of magical creatures.”

  Hogrod corrected him. “That’s where you’re wrong Ryan. I have heard of you. Fred and George Weaselby speak highly of you.”

  Ryan looked more relaxed from this point onwards. Their chat continued in a friendly, lackadaisical way for the next few minutes until Dumby appeared and sat at the head of the table to address everyone. “Thank you all for being here over Christmas, without you I’d be very lonely.” A few people laughed. “Christmas is a time for family. For those of us who have no blood family left or prefer their new family made at Hogwash, I hope you will enjoy our feast and the temporary seating arrangements. Let the feast begin.”

  There was a great round of applause, amazingly loud considering how few people there were. Once the clapping had ceased, everyone turned to the roast turkeys and so on, that had appeared in front of them.

  No one talked much over the next few minutes as everyone was enjoying their food too much. Tom however, knew he had another Christmas dinner to go to later so refrained from eating too much. Whilst Ryan was engaged in his turkey, Tom asked Hogrod about Lyrotth. “She’s doing fantastic Tom,” he said in a whisper. “Her obedience has greatly improved. Not long until she’ll be ready.”

  “Ready for what?”

  “Oops, I shouldn’t have said that…If you want, you can come and see her this afternoon.”

  “Some other time, Hogrod. I’ve got other plans for today.”

  Hogrod looked slightly disappointed but said, “Ok then. Some other time.”

  Once people had eaten enough to give them a cardiac arrest, Dumby brought the feast to an end and made a special announcement. “Since its Christmas, I have a special present for you all. For today only, you will all be allowed in each other’s common rooms. There shouldn’t be any segregation today.”

  People were to full to clap enthusiastically but a few cheered half-heartedly. The students then started to drag themselves out of the hall. Some went off for a snowball fight whilst others went to each other’s common rooms. Tom didn’t want to pass up this opportunity so qu
ickly scanned the hall for anyone he knew from a different house. To his delight, he spotted Clara.

  Ryan peeled off with some of his friends in Slytherdin so Tom made his way over to her. “Hey, Clara,” he called.

  She looked over and smiled at him, “Long time no see. Merry Christmas!”

  “Merry Christmas! I didn’t realise you’d stayed at Hogwash for the holidays.

  “Yeah. My parents have gone on an anniversary holiday so I stayed. It’s been lonely though. Everyone else went home.”

  “I can fix that. I was wondering if you wanted to hang out, I’m interested to see Hufflesnuff if you’re willing.”

  “Oh yes, I’d love to.”

  She grabbed his hand and pulled him out of the hall. They walked together, Tom following her, for a few minutes along a few corridors but staying on the ground floor. Tom had never been to this part of the castle before, he’d never seen anything important there on a map. It then dawned on him that of course the common rooms would be in places that looked desolate, to prevent students from finding them.

  Clara stopped at a blank wall. Tom looked at her, wondering what was happening. She smiled at him, then placed her hand on the wall and a perfectly circular door appeared, indented about a foot into the stone. Tom gasped and said, “That’s pretty cool. So even if someone from another house wanted to get in, they couldn’t.”

  Clara scowled at him. “You sound surprised. Can anyone get into Ravensnore?”

  “Err, not exactly. You have to answer a question to gain access.”

  “You nerds,” she joked and pushed open the door.

  Inside was a circular room, similar in shape and size to the Ravensnore common room. However, Hufflesnuff’s had a completely different feel about it. Ravensnore felt light, airy and open. Hufflesnuff’s was dark, dank and grounded. It was full of plants that gave it an earthy feel and the windows were fairly small. The chairs and sofas were all brown and mustard yellow. Tom privately thought that his common room was much better and that the Hufflesnuff’s had a pretty bad deal. Clara didn’t seem to think so though. “What do you think, Tom? Isn’t it wonderful?”

  “It’s not for me to be honest.”

  She looked surprised. “Don’t you love the feel of nature about the place?”

  So that’s what it was! It seems like being sorted into the correct house if a more complicated process than I first thought. “To tell you the truth, it doesn’t feel good at all. But then I guess, that’s why I’m not a Hufflesnuff.”

  Clara seemed determined to change his mind. “Come with me, I’ll show you my room. You might find that more appealing.”

  The corridors to the bedrooms were all circular and narrow. All the doors were painted green or brown. Clara’s room was at the very end of this particular corridor. “You got a rough deal with this room. It must be a pain walking back and forth from here all the time.”

  “I don’t mind it,” she said cheerfully.

  It amazed Tom how happy she always was. Not just at this moment but every time he saw her. She appeared to be content with what she had in life. Not seeking anything more, just making the most of what had been given to her. Tom admired her for it because it was something he could never do, perhaps that’s why he liked her. He’d always been an ambitious person. Even when he was young, his sand castle had to be bigger and better than everyone else’s.

  She opened the door and they stepped inside. “Oh this is much nicer,” Tom said to please her without actually taking it in. As it turned out, it was nicer. It had the same basic décor as the halls but Clara had added her own touches such as a few pictures on the walls and cushions. It was a bit too girly for his liking but he had to admit that she’d made the room feel a lot more welcoming and homely.

  She smiled and said, “I’m glad you think so. How does it compare to your bedroom?”

  Tom tried not to sound like he was boasting. “Sorry to say but I have a double bed and an en-suite.”

  “You’re kidding!” Clara shouted.

  “I’m not. I assumed all houses were the same. But obviously not.”

  Clara remained on edge. “You get your own bathroom! And you’re a guy, it’s not as if you need one.”

  “I do wash,” Tom interjected but Clara didn’t seem to notice. She continued as if there hadn’t been an interruption.

  “I have to share a bathroom with 9 other girls! It’s a nightmare. With us all fighting for showers and mirrors, it’s a real struggle to get to our first lessons on time.”

  She sat down on her bed as she said this. It seemed as if whilst she was content with most things, the bathroom was her limit. As Tom approached to sit down next to her, he tried to calm her down by saying “Well you always look good so it can’t be too bad.”

  They spent the next few hours talking. Just talking. About lessons, their respective houses, stuff they like to do in the holidays and so on. Tom had forgotten how much he enjoyed talking to her. The time simply flew by. All was going great until Clara accidentally mentioned her recently dead brother. It turned out that he had died of a rare blood disease that was untreatable.

  Before long, she started to cry and Tom comforted her and pulled her close. They sat in silence for a time until out of the blue, she raised her head from his chest and kissed him. He pulled away quickly. Shocked, he said, “Whoa Clara, what are you doing?”

  She looked hurt, pulled herself out of Tom’s hold and turned away. “I’m sorry, I thought you liked me.”

  Tom couldn’t believe what was happening. He said, “I do like you, but only as friends. I thought you knew that. I’m dating Amber.” Clara continued to look away from him and didn’t answer. Tom checked his watch and realised he was running late. He needed to get to the Hag’s leg, now. “Listen Clara. I’m sorry about this, I’ve got to leave now. I don’t want to leave you like this. We need to talk but there’s somewhere I need to be and I’m going to be late.” She didn’t reply so he left but as he closed the door, he thought he heard her crying again.

  Once out of Hufflesnuff common room, Tom made his way back to the entrance hall and did his usual routine. Activating his cube of illusion, he made his way out into the grounds and along to Hogswine and the Hag’s leg. The icy wind was bitterly cold on his exposed skin. He wish he’d had time to get a jacket. Even for an ex Durmprang student, this weather was too much for just a shirt so he ran all the way and in only a few minutes, was entering the bar.

  “Tom! I was starting to think you weren’t coming.”

  “Sorry I got caught up in something. I, blimey!”

  He’d just taken in his surroundings. Sitting at a round table were Ab and Albus Dumby, a large man wearing royal blue robes, Professor Snipe and a man with hair as bright orange as the Weaselby’s. They all smiled at him and he smiled back then took the vacant seat between Snipe and the man with the red hair. “I believe introductions are in order,” said Albus at once. “You already know myself, my brother and Severus of course. This,” he indicated the large man, “Is Kingston Boltshackel.” Kingston curtly nodded. “And this,” pointing to the other man, “Is Arthur Weaselby. He was recently attacked by a giant snake, hence the scars.”

  Arthur shook Tom’s hand and said, “I believe you know a few of my sons.”

  Ab then addressed Tom on the real reason of their meeting. “We are all members of a secret group trying to defeat Lord Moldywart called the Order of the Thunderbird. Albus started it when Moldywart was originally at large. We want you to… well I’ll let Albus explain, it was his idea.”

  Albus took up the conversation. “Yes. Tom, if you are willing, I would like you to become our newest member. Never before have we inducted someone who wasn’t of age but I believe we need to make an exception with you. Bear in mind that it could be life threatening, Arthur here is proof of that… Everyone here is in agreement. What do you say?”

  Tom thought for a moment. Albus then said, “You should know that you can’t tell your uncle, Mr Collivander. This
might be hard to hear but I believe he is in great danger from the death munchers. They’ll want him for his wand making skills before long, I’m almost sure of it.”

  That was a lot for Tom to take in. His only surviving family member in danger. “If you believe he is a target, why not protect him now?” Tom asked.

  “Because he has a reputation that he needs to uphold and it will look too suspicious if he suddenly vanishes. But with your help, we might be able to stop Moldywart before he seeks Garrick.”

  Tom again paused in thought before coming to a conclusion. “You’re sole purpose is to rid the world of Moldywart?” They nodded. “Then count me in. Whatever you need, I’ll help in any way I can.”

  “Excellent, let’s eat then,” finished Albus

  They tucked into another Christmas meal. It wasn’t quite the same as what hundreds of house elves could achieve, but it tasted good nevertheless. Tom spent the meal mainly listening to the others, trying to learn as much as he could about this Order of the Thunderbird. Part way through however, someone started texting him and as he pulled out his phone to read it, Arthur spotted him. He got all excited as it turned out he was an admirer of muggle products as well. From that moment onwards, Tom and Arthur discussed various things about the muggle world. Tom didn’t think he’d ever found another pure blood wizard who was as interested as him in muggle stuff.

  “Have you heard about our Ford Mondeo?” Arthur was delighted when Tom said he hadn’t. “I got it from a muggle dealership but tinkered on it to make a few wizarding touches.”

  “Naturally,” Tom interjected. Arthur nodded and continued.

  “The biggest improvement was I enchanted it so it could fly. But I also added some extra room inside and invisibility, stuff like that. It was a real shame when Ron binned it.” Arthur looked genuinely upset.

  “Did he?” asked Tom in surprise.

  “Yeah. He and Harry flew it to school and then lost it in the deadly forest. It’s now just lurking around somewhere in there. Shame, it was my prized possession.”

  Tom felt really bad for him. It sounded to him as if Harry and Ron hadn’t been very thoughtful. “I’m sorry Arthur, it sounded brilliant. I’ve never tinkered with cars myself but they’re on my to-do list.”

  “Thanks.”

  “On a different note, can I ask how come you’re here today? I’d have thought your family would have kept you close by after your injury.”

  Arthur shuffled in his seat as he said, “Please don’t mention it to any of them but they think I’m still in St. Mungo’s. I should be there really, but I wanted to be here to meet you.”

  Tom thought Mr Weaselby must be tougher than he appeared. From his perspective, Arthur was a gentle and kind father, nothing more. But being here only a few days after being attacked by a snake when he wasn’t properly healed showed strength.

  Whilst Tom and Arthur had been talking, the others had been gradually getting louder. Tom and Arthur eventually stopped talking to listen to the others. “It doesn’t seem right not to train Trotter now. The dark Lord knows far more magic than him and they will face each other again before long. It seems only right that we give him the best chance possible,” said Kingston.

  “You don’t understand Kingston, he’s too arrogant to think he needs any training,” said Snipe in his usual sneer.

  “I believe Tom can contribute to this debate,” said Albus calmly.

  “Can I?”

  “Yes you can. Haven’t you been keeping tabs on him over the past few months?”

  Everyone looked bewildered apart from Snipe, who sat in silence. “You’ve been tracking Harry? I thought you two were friends?” asked Arthur in shock.

  “It’s not like that. We’re not really friends though.” Tom said and then he addressed everyone. “Harry’s combat magic is better than most Hogwash students of his age, however I agree with Kingston. He needs more tuition.”

  “And you are the one to give it to him,” Albus said calmly, again.

  “M-Me,” Tom stuttered. “Why not you, headmaster?”

  “Because I don’t have the time and no one else is in a good a position as you are. I fear Severus is also correct. I believe that only a friend can teach him which leaves four people capable of teaching him defence. They are Black eye Rudy, Remus Kingpin, myself and you.”

  Tom butted in, “Who are these people?”

  Albus seemed slightly irritated at being interrupted but answered, “Black Eye is an ex-auror who, as you might have guessed, has a permanent black eye. But what you won’t know is that his eye gives him x-ray vision. He used to be called just X-ray Rudy but after staring at women too much, he’s now, permanently, Black Eye Rudy. Kingpin on the other hand, is an ex Defence against the Dark Arts teacher… Unfortunately, the three of us are too busy with other issues to take the time to teach Harry. Therefore you Tom, must be the one to do it. Also, I think it best for Ron and Hermione to be taught as well. Tom is definitely in the best position considering this.”

  “How is Tom meant to teach them?” Kingston said promptly.

  “Begging your pardon Kingston but I know how,” Tom said in an apologetic manner. “I’m part of a secret group run by Harry where he is teaching other students defence. All I need to do is show him some impressive magic accidentally on purpose and I’m sure he’ll want to learn it.”

  Arthur then spoke, “Are you capable of such advanced magic?”

  “I think so,” said Tom, confidently.

  Albus then nudged Snipe in the side and he spoke up. “I can teach you anything you don’t know Tom.”

  “Thanks. But Albus, if I have to teach Harry, can I at least teach Hermione,” he thought of Arthur, “and Ron with him. It’s just that I find Harry a bit obnoxious.”

  “You’re not the only one,” muttered Snipe.

  Albus ignored Snipe’s remark and said, “Yes, that seems reasonable.”

  Arthur still didn’t look entirely happy. “It still seems too risky. What if Harry doesn’t trust Tom, no offence.”

  Albus answered before Tom had the chance. “Trust me Arthur, Tom is exceptional at bending the minds of others for his desired outcome. He’s much better than he realises himself. He’s almost as good as the Tom who we are trying to get rid of.”

  “Wait, what?” Tom asked in shock.

  “You didn’t know? Lord Moldywart’s actual name is Tom Fiddle.”

  “You should hear him play,” added Kingston, sarcastically.

  This had a huge effect on Tom. I’ve been compared to the most evil wizard of all time! He didn’t like the comparison but at the same time felt pride in being called almost as good as Moldywart, who Tom believed was the most powerful wizard of all time.

  The rest of the meeting was spent discussing the timetable for guard duty of something. Tom was too preoccupied with his own thoughts to pay much attention. By the time the meeting was over, everyone had said their goodbyes and Tom had gone back up to the castle, it had turned midnight. He’d planned to seek out Clara to straighten things out but he knew he’d no longer be able to get into the Hufflesnuff common room so went to be instead. All in all, one of my more memorable Christmas’s, he thought as he got into the Ravensnore common room which was deserted. He then smiled to himself as he remembered how much worse the Hufflesnuff common room was. With new found respect for his accommodation, he went to have a shower in his own bathroom.