Radley's Home for Horny Monsters

by Annabelle Hawthorne

  “Mom?” She hung from her seatbelt, wide eyes on the pavement in front of them. Everything smelled of gasoline and hot asphalt.

  “You little shit,” she uttered, looking at him, her eyes not quite focusing. With shaking hands, she pulled a box of cigarettes from her bra, along with a lighter.

  “Mom, don’t!” He tried to grab the cigarette from her, but his arm didn’t work right.

  “Fuck you, Mikey!” She stuck it in her mouth and lit it. A deep inhale, and she blew the smoke in his face. “I wish you had never been fucking born!”

  The smell of gasoline was stronger now, and he realized that it was leaking from above his mother and dripping on to the roof below.

  “Put it out!” he hollered, fighting to get free of his seat.

  She tried to slap him, but was unable to reach. Instead, she swiped with her nails, catching his shirt and leaving deep scratches on the skin beneath. Ignoring her, he tried again to undo his seatbelt, but it was no use. It was simply too tight to be undone.

  “Where the fuck do you think you’re going?” The cigarette fell from her mouth, landing below her.

  The vapors had grown even stronger, and his eyes watered. He grabbed a broken piece of metal and sawed frantically at his belt.

  “Anywhere I can, as long as it’s away from you!” he cried, finally slicing through the fabric. He fell to the roof just as the gas ignited. His mother let out a shriek of pain as she was immediately immolated. The ball of fire seared his side. Shrieking in pain, Mike pushed through the broken windshield only to have a strong pair of hands yank him free.

  MIKE OPENED HIS EYES. He was relieved to discover that both time and distance separated him from that burning car. However, the intense blast of heat had been replaced with the exact opposite.

  He shivered. His clothing was soaked, the stone beneath him was cold, and his muscles were cramping up again. He was lucky that the temperature outside wasn’t any colder, else he would probably be looking at freezing to death.

  A dim glow filled the opening of the cave, and Cecilia reappeared. She was carrying a small messenger bag that was now covered in a light film of frost. “Here. Tink put some stuff in there for you.”

  “She did?” Mike opened the bag to look inside. Inside he found a light blanket, an amber stone, and a box of frozen Eggos. Mike couldn’t help but laugh, putting the Eggos to the side. “What is this?” he asked, holding up the fist-sized stone.

  “A sun stone. Rub your hands together until your skin is hot, then hold the stone between them and blow on it.”

  Mike obliged, rubbing his stiff, shaky hands against each other. The warmth was fleeting, but he kept at it until he was certain that they were actually warm, and not just warm to him. He grabbed the stone, lifted it to his face and blew.

  The stone glowed, sucking the warmth from his hands. Energy swirled around inside of it, and it ignited, shedding a light that reminded Mike of a salt lamp. It was surprisingly hot, so he set it down in front of him. Soon the whole cavern was toasty. Sighing, Mike stripped off his wet clothes and laid them next to the stone to dry, then wrapped himself in the blanket.

  “She said to make sure that comes back,” Cecilia informed him. “She got it out of the Vault.”

  “What’s so dangerous about this?”

  “The amount of heat used to activate it determines how much warmth it gives off.” Cecilia knelt by the stone. “This was found in the rubble of Pompeii.”

  “Shit.” Mike stared at the innocuous stone. Several minutes passed, and he realized that he had become lost in its flickering glow. “This was just sitting in the Vault?”

  Cecilia shook her head. “It’s one of the few things in there that is labeled. The one who built the house stored away such things to keep them from the hands of man, for they are too dangerous. We were invited to the house to help him protect these items from getting out, though we ourselves are also in need of protection. That is the nature of the house - it requires balance between the mortal and supernatural worlds to truly be a haven to all.”

  “Do you remember anything about the original owner?” Mike asked.

  Cecilia shook her head. “It’s strange. Whenever a new Caretaker is selected, everything from the house becomes a blur. I can remember before coming here, and after you arrived. The gaps get filled. I met the original owner long before coming here, and yet my memories of him have been erased in a similar manner.”

  “So a powerful wizard then?”

  “More than that. To accomplish such a spell would require Old Magic. The kind of magic that created me and Naia. Humans, to my knowledge, are incapable of such a feat. But in my heart, I know that he was a human, or at least used to be.”

  “What do you remember?”

  “My family in Ireland. I was the spirit responsible for taking them to the afterlife. Every family had one, a gift from the spirits of the land to the people. Back in the old days, humans and the sidhe lived in harmony. With the spread of the Catholic church, many of the old ways were lost to them, and the sidhe took back many of their gifts, but the banshees remained. We are tied to our family for all time, or until they cease to believe in us.”

  “Is that what happened to your family?”

  “No. The potato famine. There was a period of time where I came to their home every few days. The sole survivor of my family was a child who was taken in by the church. Knowing that my days were numbered, I roamed the countryside, trying to see as much of the changing world as I could before fading away into the Void.”

  “The Void?”

  “It’s just a name, a bedtime story for creatures like me. Where does a spirit go when they die? Nobody knows, not even the sidhe. We call it the Void, for nothing has ever come back from such a place.” Cecilia smiled. “Though I do not remember our meeting, I can remember the sudden warmth of him, a being who brought me such hope. In much the same way that a banshee can be passed on by marriage to an outsider, he brought me to the New World, and it was here I wandered until he built our home. I saw the railroads being built, watched brother fight brother in the Civil War. Always the observer, never taking part. Though I claim many years as my own, I believe that I have never truly lived. Not until you came.”

  “Am I really that different from previous Caretakers?” Mike asked. He picked up his pants, which were sufficiently dry. He slid into them, savoring the sensation of warmth along his legs. It was like getting clothes out of the dryer. He pulled the blanket around him to trap in the heat. “I mean, they couldn’t have been bad or anything, right?”

  “I feel that you are the only one who has lived among us that has not seen the clear lines between your kind and ours. Everyone fucks the nymph - that is her magic, and it binds Caretakers to the home. Though past Caretakers treated us as friends, or even family, there was always an unspoken rule between us. Some of us aren’t as human as others, and, in turn, were never truly part of the home. But you. You include everybody equally.”

  Mike frowned. “Growing up, I never fit in. My mom lost her shit after my dad died, and we were always bouncing from home to home. The reason we kept moving was her friends didn’t like how she treated me. Instead of finding a way to fix the problem, they turned their backs on it. I was tired of seeing the pity in their eyes when they told us their spare room was no longer available, or that they wanted their couch back. No matter what anybody said, my mom blamed me for it.” He swallowed, his throat suddenly dry. “I guess you could say that I became tired of humans. For all their good intent, I always felt like they were ready to look away when the going got tough. When I met all of you, this was your home as well as mine. Maybe I am the new Caretaker, but you all aren’t my pets.”

  “Most people don’t have sex with their pets,” Cecilia teased.

  Mike laughed. “Most being the operative word. Living with you feels like my first taste of true acceptance, of freedom. I would just like to survive long enough to see what comes next.”

  “I must admi
t, no Caretaker has had this much trouble up front. However, the Society was not a problem until Garrett came along. Emily was in a position of power, she knew exactly how to keep them at bay. Your learning curve has been tremendous, runsearc. I am proud of what you have accomplished in so short a time.”

  “You mean nearly burning down the house, destroying the garage, and feeding a witch to a plant?” That last one was still taking him some time to digest.

  “That isn’t what I speak of.” Cecilia was suddenly close, a chill returning to the air. “I am proud that you have given your heart so freely.” Her hands slid beneath the blanket and touched his chest. “It isn’t just physical pleasure that you seek. It is something more, a connection.”

  Mike shivered at her touch, the ice of her hands traveling through his stomach. “I think part of it is the Nymph’s Blessing. It makes me more willing, physically and mentally. After what happened with the Mandragora, there is no way I should be able to get aroused.”

  Grinning, Cecilia let her hand slide across the front of his pants. “And yet you are.”

  Mike opened his mouth to say something, but he couldn’t put what he wanted into words. “I like that it feels like it’s more than just sex. Yes, there is some lust, but I feel that there is so much more between us than that. Naia is an extension of my soul. Tink is my shadow, she follows me everywhere. Abella is my protector, my guardian.”

  “And what about me?” Her lips were close to his. “What role do I have in this?”

  “You are the unknown. One day, I know you will walk me to the other side, and I will see many strange and wonderful things. It will be good to know that I have a friend to help me through it.”

  “More than a friend.” She stroked Mike’s cheek and pulled him into her. His lips tasted hers, the first spark of the evening. She broke contact, her white eyes glowing in the darkness of the cave. “Always more than a friend.”

  “Hold on,” Mike said. He scooted against the wall of the cave and leaned back, then waved her forward. She floated toward him and landed gently on his lap, then ran both of her hands up his chest. “Sorry, my legs are all messed up.”

  “It’s not your legs I am interested in.” Cecilia straddled his hips, and her mouth found his.

  The warmth of the cave coupled with the banshee’s cool embrace made Mike feel like he was standing in the doorway of an air-conditioned building during a hot day in summer. Small wind currents were starting to move in the cave, the temperature trying to equalize. Cecilia’s hands moved along his sides, then down his hips. He could feel her cool thighs against him, her pelvis pushing into his.

  He squeezed her waist, then moved one hand down to caress her ass through her skirt. He pulled her forward, grinding his crotch into hers. “Do you think the sidhe ever pictured you with a mortal?”

  “If they did, they probably forbade it.” Cecilia kissed her way down his neck. He kissed her forehead, realizing the hairs on his arms stood at attention every time he touched her with his lips. She leaned away from him, giving him access to her neck and the tops of her breasts. Her hair fluttered up around her head, the static building between them. “Kiss me more,” she whispered, her voice echoing softly in the cave.

  “I can do that,” Mike said. He kissed the cool skin of her shoulders, his hands running behind her ears. Cecilia moved her hips back and forth, causing Mike’s dick to become even harder.

  “I can feel it,” she whispered, still moving back and forth. “That part of me that I never knew existed. It’s like fire, and ice, and lightning, all centered in my being. I want to feel more of it, that human feeling I’ve never known.”

  “Then let me help you.” Mike undid his pants and slid them down his hips. Cecilia immediately grabbed his cock, then teased the top of it with her ice-cold fingers, kissing him deeply on the lips at the same time. Mike’s fingers dropped to the top of her ass, and he squeezed the cool, soft globes through her skirt.

  Cecilia pumped Mike this way for a couple of minutes. Her legs floated up above and her head dropped. She took him into her mouth, squeezing his balls gently while she swallowed the length of his dick. Mike gasped as Cecilia moved into a kind of headstand, holding his hips to pull him all the way into her body.

  “Oh, Cecilia!” Mike grabbed her head and lifted her off his dick and back up to his lips. She embraced him, her tongue dancing along his. He let his hands travel the length of her body, grabbing her floating body by the hips and moving her waist down to his. She lifted her skirt up and rubbed her panty-clad pussy up and down his cock, then used one finger to shift the material to the side, allowing him to slide deep inside of her.

  “Mmh!” Cecilia moaned into his mouth, her pussy cool and electrifying at the same time. Once he was plugged into the Banshee Sexual Network, the world exploded in sparks, the steady glow of the sunstone punctuated by the miniature lightning bursts that jumped from Cecilia through Mike’s thighs and then into the ground.

  “Move slower,” he told her. “I want to take my time.”

  She obliged, moving her hips more gently. They kissed some more, hands exploring each other. Mike was determined to pull her clothes away from her skin, fighting the magic that held it against her skin. It became a fun game for him, trying to peek at the pale skin beneath, explore it with his hands, taste it with his tongue. As he ran his lips across the top of her breasts, Cecilia’s hips began to move on their own, her pace quickening.

  The sparks increased in frequency, the mild shocks forcing Mike and Cecilia together, driving him deeper than ever. Every thrust completely lacked control, his body moving in time with the sparks. His breathing was ragged, and Cecilia was starting to gasp for air, her breasts heaving with each breath.

  “Oh, fuck!” Mike grabbed her ass and pulled her as close as possible. She squeezed him with her thighs, her lighter-than-air body starting to pull him upward. When she sat back on his cock, they both slammed into the ground, driving Mike’s cock even deeper into Cecilia.

  It began as a low wail, Cecilia building steam as her orgasm approached. She clutched his upper arms, nails digging into his flesh, her lower body quivering in anticipation. Her cries echoed across the cavern, the cave itself becoming a giant amplifier. Mike feared that if she screamed he would go deaf, but his fears were mitigated by the sudden fire blossoming deep inside his stomach. His balls ached, drawing up into his body, and he yanked down on Cecilia, fighting to bury himself in her. Her hips bucked, and her cries started to rise in pitch.

  “Please! Please, don’t!” Mike thrust wildly. “I’m so close, please don’t disappear!”

  “Don’t worry,” she said, a grin on her lips. “This time it’s all about you.” She closed her eyes, grunting several times, forcing herself down onto his shaft hard enough that he bottomed out. Each grunt was punctuated by a sudden tightening of her vagina as well as a spark of lightning that jumped from her to Mike or the cave itself. Gasping for air, she smiled at him as she rode him, then leaned back so that he could see her properly, watch the place where they were joined, see his huge dick sliding in and out of her glistening, wet pussy.

  “Fuck. Fuck. FUCK!” Mike came, the fire inside his belly launching deep inside the banshee. He grabbed her around the waist, holding her in place so that he could push into her with all his might.

  “Oh God, it’s so warm. It’s so warm!” Cecilia’s whole body crackled with energy, and Mike watched in amazement as her ivory skin suddenly glowed with color, radiating up and out from her waist. She was no longer light, and she sank down onto him as flesh and bone. The color spread to her face, and her featureless, white eyes were suddenly glittering emeralds, her white hair turning a crimson shade of red.

  “Cecilia?” Mike asked, but she was lost to him, gasping and groaning as she used the lubrication of his load to ride him like the world was ending. She grabbed his shoulders for purchase, her hair rising unfurling into a storm cloud made of blood-red strands and lightning

  The scream that came f
rom her mouth was that of a human, not a monster. The magic that burst from her fed directly into Mike. His dick suddenly rock hard again, he pushed Cecilia backward and pulled out of her long enough to flip her on her stomach.

  “Mike,” she shrieked as he penetrated her from behind. “Oh God, Mike!” She clawed at the stony floor and shoved her ass back into him so abruptly that his balls slapped against her clit. “MIKE!” She came, spasming on the floor.

  “GAH!” The electricity swirled up through his body, streamers of current dancing off his head and shoulders. Sinking his fingers into her ass, he pounded her as quickly as he could. The rock walls bounced the energy back and forth between them.

  Cecilia rolled Mike on his back to ride him one last time, sweat pouring down her face, her clothing in disarray. Then she lay down on his body, her breasts pushed against his chest, her hips twitching with her most recent orgasm. Whispering sweet-sounding words to him in a foreign tongue, she fell asleep on his chest.

  Mike wrapped an arm around her, then pulled the blanket close. He stared in wonder at the beauty in his arms, watching in amazement as the color slowly left her, her blazing red hair going white again. She became cool to the touch, but he welcomed the sensation. Her body became lighter and lighter until she faded away in the glittering light, leaving Mike behind with a smile on his face and a new memory.

  THEY LEFT AT DAWN AND walked non-stop to the door of the greenhouse. They stepped together through the portal, the jungle of the greenhouse fading away behind them as they stepped into the sun of the regular world. The backyard was littered with giant craters and stone piles, grass and soil torn apart.

  “What happened here?” Mike asked.

  “Complications,” Cecilia replied. “I’ll let the others tell you all about it.”

  Shaking his head, Mike limped along the path behind the house. The Mandragora vines were completely gone now, having left grooves in the surrounding bushes where they used to be.