As soon as the lunch bell rang, Melody hurried out to the athletic field to join Kelly. Hanging out with him helped her avoid the whispers about her past. And her silence never bothered him.
When she rounded the corner, Kelly sat on the bleachers down by the track, strumming his guitar. Shoulders hunched, sunglasses sliding down his nose, hat perched on the crown of his head, he was completely immersed in his music.
Spending the lunch hour listening to Kelly play his guitar helped her get through the school day. Sometimes he worked on original songs and other times he played the well-known to the obscure. He reminded her of Daddy and the way he’d practice in the evenings. Kelly played an acoustic guitar like Daddy did, too.
He didn’t hear her approach, but looked up and grinned when she sat on the bench next to him.
“If it isn’t my number one fan.” He laid the guitar across his lap and tapped his chin. “Now, what does Melody Fisher want to hear today?”
She glanced at her hands.
“No need to be shy. Request whatever you like and I’ll kill it for you.” He cupped his hand around his ear. “What’s that? You want ‘Every Heart Has Its Time To Fall’? Whose heart have you been breaking, darlin’?”
Kelly gripped the neck of the guitar and played the first few notes.
Melody stiffened. Maybe she shouldn’t have come.
Kelly softly sang along.
No understanding
The truth ain’t out
A bitter break up
What’s it all about
There are two sides
To every story
For broken hearts
There is no glory
When he hit the chorus, she couldn’t help it—she softly sang with him.
Making it public
A he said she said
Tears go to sleep
Alone in bed
When hurt, the tongue
Makes a fool of us all
Every heart
Has its time to fall
Tears streamed down her face by the time they finished the chorus.
“Oh no.” The last note died away as Kelly leaned forward and used the back of his finger to wipe the tears off her cheeks. “Don’t cry, Melody. I’m sorry, honey. I never meant to upset you.”
Melody took a deep breath and tried to get her emotions under control. She hadn’t listened to the song for a while. The hurt was still too much.
“Whoever he was, he’s not worth it.” Kelly wrapped his arms around her. “You let it all out ... and then I want to know where you learned to sing like that.”
The realization she had sung in front of Kelly hit her like a thunderclap. How could she have been so careless? She pulled out of his embrace.
“Whoa, darlin’ ... I won’t tell anyone.”
She searched his eyes. Could she trust him?
He put his hand over his heart. “I promise. Cross my heart and hope to die.” His forefinger traced a small x over his heart. “You have a beautiful voice, but if it makes you uncomfortable for anyone to know, it’ll be our little secret.” He settled his hat more squarely on his head. “Now I know why they put you in choir. Thought it was a strange class for someone who doesn’t speak. It’d be an honor to perform with you. Just sayin’.”
Melody relaxed. Kelly was her friend and for once friendship didn’t have teeth to bite her with.
Kelly took her hand. “We’re friends, so I got your back. No worries.” He grabbed his guitar and sang the chorus of “Stand By Me” at the top of his lungs.
She giggled, though the tears still stood in her eyes.
“Seriously, Melody, I figure you have a reason for staying silent and until you’re comfortable talking, you shouldn’t.” He puffed out his chest. “And I got you to laugh. So there. Are we good?”
She nodded. The bell rang. The time always passed so quickly when she and Kelly were together. Like it used to with Vince. Before...
She pushed the thought away. Thinking about Vince was a quick trip through hell to regret.
Roger looked up from his tablet and pursed his lips. “You seem pensive today. What happened?”
Was he a mind reader? She should be able to keep some things to herself. “Nothing.”
His eyes narrowed to slits as he studied her. “Nooo. There’s something you haven’t talked about. I sensed a hesitation when I asked whether you had spoken to anyone at school today.”
She broke eye contact. Had she hesitated? She hadn’t spoken. She wasn’t ready to share what Kelly’s song had uncovered. She’d already cried once today. She wasn’t ready to rip that scar off. “I didn’t talk.”
He tapped his upper lip. “You did something to communicate. Why are you so evasive? You know you’re going to tell me eventually.”
“You’re not gonna let it go, are you?”
He smiled and shook his head. “You know me better than that.”
Melody strode to the window and looked out. The grass was overgrown. Roger should get the groundskeeper to trim it up. Although, their squirrel could run through the grass in stealth mode, ripples in the sea of green the only sign he was on the move beyond his tail bouncing above the grass tips with each step.
She bit the inside of her bottom lip. If she told Roger about singing with Kelly, then he’d want to hear the song, and the thought made her ill. But he wouldn’t let up until she shared. Why did she always have to relive hell?
“I sang.”
“What?”
The incredulity in his voice made her want to snicker, except she knew what was coming next.
“What song?” Roger spluttered. “Why? Wait, never mind why. I am so proud of you, Melody. This is a huge breakthrough.”
He might change his mind. One slip didn’t mean she was ready to be a chatterbox. She fingered her music player. She might as well get this over with. She returned to the couch and connected the player and played “Every Heart Has Its Time To Fall”. Then she buried her face in her hands. She couldn’t sing until the song hit the second verse.
Anger builds
Into screamers yell
Standing on
The edge of hell
No communication
Will make it worse
I don’t believe
That love’s a curse
Making it public
A he said she said
Tears go to sleep
Alone in bed
When hurt, the tongue
Makes a fool of us all
Every heart
Has its time to fall
Honesty could’ve
Cut it off at the pass
But regret in life
Seems to always last
Never forgetting
What you should’ve done
You continue to pray
But you still feel numb
Chapter Forty
April 6, 2013 – Melody, age 14
Sadie screeched to a halt at the red light and took the opportunity to glare at me. “How did I get saddled with the job of taking you places?” She sneered. “And when did you get popular enough to hang out at the mall?”
I shifted uncomfortably in the passenger seat. “I’m not popular.”
Sadie’s anger blazed across the inches separating us. “I guess I should feel blessed you spoke to me. Is that your appeal to James? You never interrupt him as he’s telling you how great he is.”
My head snapped to face her.
Her dark-lipsticked lips curved into a smirk. “Do you think I’m stupid? He was after you day one.” Her eyes flicked toward the light. “Did you give him what he’s after yet?”
The light turned green and she put her foot down on the accelerator, throwing me back in the seat. At least it saved me from answering her mocking question.
My stomach was tied in enough knots already without her adding to it. James had barely spoken last night when he drove me home. And no matter how much I wanted to, I couldn’t explain. Telli
ng my boyfriend he wasn’t the only one I was having sex with wasn’t a conversation I could start. And I couldn’t tell him why I’d cried because he’d be disgusted with me. Who would blame him? I was disgusted with myself.
I had no idea whether James would have had a chance to get over his hurt, but he hadn’t canceled. At least Vince would be there to be a buffer between us. I buried my face in my hands. But Vince wouldn’t be much easier to be around because of his feelings. Maybe I should have stayed home.
“Oh, please.”
Sadie’s strident voice cut through my thoughts.
“You’ve been dating James. You’re beyond shame, so don’t pretend.”
One of these days she might tell me exactly what she had against James, but it was pointless to argue with her.
The tires squealed as Sadie turned into the mall complex. After dropping me off, she was going to her martial arts class a few blocks farther on. The proximity of her class to the mall was the only way Evelyn convinced her to give me a ride. I should have let Vince pick me up, but Hatchet always had a fit when Vince came around.
Pulling up in front of Dillard’s, Sadie grabbed my arm. “Find your own way home. I’m not coming back for you.”
My jaw set. Being around Sadie was a constant battle in biting my tongue.
When I hopped out of the car, I found Vince pacing by the entrance, hands shoved in his pockets and shoulders hunched forward. I bit my lower lip. He hunched like that when he was either freezing or upset, and it wasn’t cold. James wasn’t waiting for me.
I hesitated. Vince hadn’t seen me yet, so maybe I should slip away. I didn’t want to learn James had blown us off because of last night.
My shoulders slumped. As much as I didn’t want to face the boys today, it would be worse if I waited to see them for the first time on Monday at school. I took a deep breath, smoothed my hair behind my back, and walked toward Vince.
Why did it feel like I was walking the last mile? Vince was my friend.
As I approached, Vince looked up and gave me a halfhearted wave. “Hey, Melody.” He flipped his bangs out of his eyes, then shifted from one foot to the other.
Had he changed his mind about being my friend? I couldn’t take that after everything else. I swallowed the lump in my throat and put a hand on his shoulder. “What’s wrong?”
His brown eyes took on such a sad expression, my heart broke.
“Um ... why don’t we go to the food court and get something to eat? We can talk then.”
It must be bad for him to not tell me straight out. “Shouldn’t we wait for James?”
Vince turned away. “He’s here. He went inside already.”
His words felt like a punch to the gut. I bit the inside of my lip to keep it from trembling.
Vince navigated around the shoppers until we left the store and hit the main mall thruway. It was packed today. The conversations from passersby washed over me as Vince gently led me toward the food court at the opposite end of the concourse. Neither of us tried to make small talk.
As we passed the stores, I focused on the window displays, desperately trying to keep my mind from imagining all the terrible things Vince would tell me once we stopped. But then I saw the back of James’s head. He stood outside the vape shop with a group of his friends. My steps slowed to a halt.
Vince tugged my arm. “Come on, Melody, let’s go talk first.”
“No.” If James was breaking up with me, I wanted to hear it from him. I wasn’t going to let him use Vince to do his dirty work. “You stay here.”
I marched to the group of guys and touched James on the arm.
He turned toward me with a smile that faded when his eyes met mine. “What are you doing here?”
My worst fears were confirmed, but I had to hear it from him. “We had plans to hang out today.”
His eyes took on the quality of hard blue marbles—cold and unfeeling. “That was before you proved you were too much of a baby to be my girlfriend.”
His buddies nudged one another and chuckled.
I had to try to explain ... but what could I say? “You don’t understand—”
“Ha!” James cut me off. “You’re right. I don’t understand.” His nose wrinkled as anger etched grooves into his face. “One minute everything is fine, we’re having fun, and the next minute you stiffen up and it’s like fucking a mannequin.”
His buddies broke into laughter.
The redhead’s eyes bulged. “Dude, you did an ice maiden?”
Flames of embarrassment heated my face. What had happened to the James I thought I knew? Yeah, he could be a jerk sometimes, but when we were alone, he had a softer side.
James turned away from me. “Too many girls are willing to put out to waste time with someone so frigid.”
My eyes burned as they filled with tears.
James had high-fived two of the guys in the circle when Vince grabbed his arm and spun him around.
“Vince!” I didn’t want him to get involved.
James’s eyes barely had a chance to widen before Vince punched him in the jaw.
James reeled back a few steps before he righted himself. “What the hell, Vince?”
His buddies formed a wall behind James.
“Apologize, asshole.” Vince clenched both fists.
James cocked his arm back. “Like hell. She had no business coming here after you told her it was over.”
So I had been right. James had wanted Vince to do his dirty work.
Vince snapped his head to the left to avoid James’s fist. “She didn’t know.”
James’s jaw slackened and he faced me, his face a bright red. “Look Mel, you were different, and we had a lot of fun together.”
For a moment, the James I knew peeked out from softened eyes.
He stared at the ground. “I ... I just can’t ...”
I had to get away from him. If I started crying, I wouldn’t be able to stop.
Rushing past the group, I ran pell-mell through the crowd, brushing against shoppers.
“Melody!”
Vince caught up with me by the planter in the center of the mall. He took me into his arms and held me tight. I burst into tears.
He stroked my hair. “Shhhh ... You’re gonna be okay.” He pulled me to the planter, and we sat on the marble seat.
I buried my head on his shoulder and sobbed.
When the tears finally subsided, I sat up and Vince used his handkerchief to wipe my face.
“I know it hurts right now, Melody. But you’ll see, you’re better off without him.”
I knew Vince meant well, but he didn’t understand. My tears were about more than James. The loss of a boyfriend would hurt, but I had lost so much more. The time I spent with James was the only time I could forget about Hatchet.
Shudders cascaded through me at the thought of Hatchet and I couldn’t stop shaking.
Vince rubbed my back. “Don’t. He’s not worth all this.”
I gripped the seat edge and rocked. If I told Vince the shaking had nothing to do with James, I didn’t think I’d be able to stop from spilling everything.
White dints appeared on either side of Vince’s nose as he frowned. “Did he really mean that much to you? Why?”
The hurt in Vince’s eyes pierced through me. “It’s not what you think.”
“You don’t know what I think.” His lips formed a thin line. “Do you even care?”
“Yes.” The word came out in the barest whisper. This couldn’t be happening.
“I thought I could do this, but I don’t think I can.” Tears filled his eyes. “Do you know how hard it is to console you because some jerk broke things off after you slept with him?” He sniffed. “My heart is breaking to see you torn up over someone who doesn’t care about you when I’ve loved you—”
The words hung between us, dividing us like an ever-widening gap.
“Vince—”
“Don’t.” He held up his hand. “Don’t tell me how you’
ve never felt the same way about me.” His jaw pulsed. “I want to be your friend. I’m not sure I can.”
“Please don’t say that. I don’t know how I’m going to survive without you.” My lip trembled. “You’re my sanity.” If I didn’t tell him something, I’d lose him.
“It’s shredding me ... and all over someone who doesn’t deserve you.”
I took his hands in mine and gazed into his big brown eyes. “I can’t tell you everything, but this isn’t about James ... not all of it.” I closed my eyes to gather courage—mistake. Hatchet’s face rose in my mind, along with the threatening knife he had used to keep me silent. I had to get out. I couldn’t go back to the Hatchets’ ever again. And other than running away, which wouldn’t solve anything, there was only one way out.
I had to do it before I lost my resolve. “I’ll tell you one day, and I hope you won’t be ashamed of me, but I have to do something first. Can I borrow your phone?”
“Sure.” He handed it to me.
“Thanks.” I walked a few feet away so he couldn’t overhear my conversation. I dialed the number and listened to the line ring. Please pick up.
“Hello?”
I took a deep breath. “Miss Prescott, it’s Melody. I’m in trouble and need to talk.”
Chapter Forty-One
Spring 2015 – Melody, age 16
Melody poured the hot water over the tea leaves and put the lid on the teapot. Rebecca sat at the table with stacks of manila folders surrounding her. She had been working nonstop since they’d come home. Periodically, she’d grab a new folder off the stack, run her hands through her red hair and sigh.
While the tea steeped, Melody pulled Rebecca’s TARDIS mug out of the cupboard, poured in some hot water, and swirled it around to warm the cup. The TARDIS cup always made Melody smile because it was such a whimsical thing for the no-nonsense caseworker she knew. And it was huge. She strained the tea and poured it into the mugs.
“You’re tuckered, Rebecca.” Melody set the TARDIS cup next to Rebecca’s right hand and took a seat. “Break time.”
Rebecca’s reading glasses slid to the tip of her nose when she grasped the mug. “Bless you. You don’t know how badly I need this.” She took off the lid and raised the steaming cup to her lips. With the first sip, she threw her head back and exhaled. “Perfect.”
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