“It has been indeed.”
“How can I help you?” he asked, somewhat closing his door so I couldn’t see the mess that existed behind him.
“I’m actually here on behalf of Ellie. You see…I love her, sir. I am in love with your daughter for a million reasons. She is truly the greatest gift this world has given to me, and she is currently heartbroken because she misses her father.”
Kevin grimaced and huffed. “Now, look, if you came here to make me feel bad—”
“That’s not why I’m here,” I cut in. “Not at all. Trust me, if anyone knows what you’re going through, it’s me. Over a year ago, my wife passed away, leaving me with my two daughters. I shut down completely. I pushed everything and everyone away because I couldn’t face a world where Nicole no longer existed. But then, against my stubbornness, Eleanor Gable came back into my life, and she saved me. She’s the most patient person in the world, Kevin, and I bet she gets that trait from her mother. I bet she gets a lot of her best traits from Paige.”
The moment I said her name, I saw Kevin react. The heartache that lived inside him was still alive and strong. But I wouldn’t stop speaking, because I knew he needed to hear my words.
“Eleanor is nurturing and kind, and her smile can light up a whole room. When she laughs, she does it with her whole body, and when she cries, it breaks every part of your heart. She’s forgiving, even when she shouldn’t be. She’s understanding, even when people are hard to understand. She’s gentle. She’s sensitive. She’s beautiful inside and out, and I know that came from her mother. So, that makes it hard for you.”
He closed his eyes and took in deep breaths. “You don’t understand…”
“She has her eyes,” I said softly, because I did understand. I understood more than he knew. “Which makes it hard to look at her. She has her smile, which makes you want to frown. She has so many parts of the woman you lost, so you push her away because it hurts so much. But Kevin, you’ll have to come to realize that what you think is a curse, is actually a miracle. I get to see Nicole each time I look into my children’s eyes. I get to see her smile. I get to hear her laughter, and that is the greatest gift this world could ever offer.”
He opened his eyes, and I saw the same despair that I’d lived with before. The sadness that had been swallowing him whole for the past sixteen-some years. “How did you get there?” he asked. “How did you begin to heal?”
“That’s easy. I let Eleanor in, and you should do the same.”
He shook his head and grumbled as he wiped away his tears. “No. I can’t. It’s been too long. Too much time has passed. I can’t fix our relationship.”
“You can’t, or you won’t try? All I’m saying is, if you ever want to fix things with Eleanor, she’ll be there to listen.”
“How do you know that? How can you be so sure?”
“Because that’s the woman you’ve raised. You brought a woman into this world who breathes unconditional love.”
Kevin lowered his head, and I could almost witness the wheels turning in his head. I reached into my pocket and pulled out one of my business cards. “Listen, I don’t want to take up any more of your time. I just wanted to stop by and let you know that your daughter’s love is worth fighting for. And when you are at your lowest, you can give me a call. Give me a call, and I’ll walk you through it. From one widower to another, I promise you, Kevin, the sun can shine again. All you have to do is wake up.”
He took the card from my hand and nodded slowly. “Thanks, Greyson.”
“Of course, and here, take this.” I headed him the novel. “Just in case you two need to find something that you have in common to talk about.”
I turned to walk off, and he called my name once more.
“Greyson?”
“Yes?” I rotated around to look at him.
He brushed his hand under his nose and cleared his throat. “You’ll take care of her?”
“Yes, sir,” I promised. “For as long as we both shall live.”
59
Eleanor
On the anniversary of my mother’s death, I found a moment to give thanks to her because I knew she probably had a lot to do with bringing Greyson and me back together. I knew she always had a way of showing me her love.
“We should go to Laurie Lake,” Greyson suggested as he walked up and wrapped his arms around me. “You know, to celebrate her memory.”
“I’d really love that.”
The girls were at Claire’s house, so we made the drive to the lake, and as we approached, I felt calmness. It was as if I could sense her being there. As we began walking through the trees to our hidden oasis, my heart came to a halt as I looked up to see my father standing there with his back to me.
“Dad?” I asked, stunned and confused.
He turned and gave me the saddest smile. “Hey, Snickers,” he whispered. Surrounding him were wrapped boxes and a stack of card envelopes. In his hands was a novel and he waved it. “I finally got around to reading this Harry Potter thing you were always talking about. It’s pretty good.”
I tried to speak, but my voice cracked. When I tried again, it came out as a whisper. “What are you doing here?” I looked over at Greyson, who gave me a knowing grin. It was clear he’d had something to do with it.
“I think I left something in the car. I’ll be back,” Greyson said. I reached out to him, nervous and unsure of what to do, but he gently squeezed my hand. “You don’t have to forgive him, Ellie, but it’s okay to listen. You’ll be okay, and I’ll be around the corner at the car, ready and waiting for you, okay?”
I nodded. “Okay.”
He left us alone, and Dad kept alternating between looking at the water and looking at me. I moved in closer but still didn’t say a word. I had so many things I’d wanted to say to him, but nothing was coming out.
He coughed a little and brushed his hand against the back of his neck. “I think I’m a Ravenclaw, based on all the details. I’m guessing you’re a Hufflepuff, based on what I’ve read and what I know about you.”
“What is all this stuff?” I asked, looking around, as confused as ever.
“Oh, it’s…um, well, it’s…” His thoughts were jumbled, and I didn’t blame him. My thoughts were in the same state. “It’s sixteen birthday cards and sixteen Christmas gifts, for all the years I missed. I, um…” He scratched his head and then pounded his fist against his mouth. “I missed out on so much, and I know you aren’t going to forgive me for that, but I just wanted you to know that, I…I’m so sorry, Ellie.”
“You abandoned me,” I whispered. “You abandoned me for years, and you think some cards and gifts are going to make up for that? I didn’t want your gifts, Dad. I wanted you.”
“I know, I know, and I don’t deserve your forgiveness. I don’t know if I will ever get it, but I want to work at it. I want to do my best to earn you back into my life. Ellie, after your mother passed away, something inside me snapped. It completely broke, and I didn’t want to figure out how to put it back together. Seeing you…your smile, your eyes… Every part of your mother lives in you, and I wasn’t strong enough to deal with that. I wasn’t strong enough, and I screwed up, and I’m sorry. I know it doesn’t change all these years, but I am sorry for being a shit father. You deserve more than me.”
“Yes,” I agreed, “I do.”
He lowered his head, stung by my words.
“But, regardless of that fact, you’re still the only thing I’ve ever wanted.” When he looked up, tears were streaming down his cheeks, which in turn, made me cry.
“I’m a mess, Ellie.”
“I know you are. I’ve been a mess, too, and I’m not going to lie; I’m still really mad at you. I’m still hurting, and it’s going to take a long time for me to get to a place where I feel as if I can forgive you completely.”
“Yes. I understand.”
“But if you’re willing to try…” I offered.
His eyes lit up. “Yes, I am. I am
more than willing. Anything it takes.”
“If we do this, we do it together,” I told him. “If we fall, we fall together. If we break, we shatter as one, but we don’t leave each other anymore, okay Dad? We fight for this. We fight for our family. We fight for us.”
“All for one,” he whispered.
“And one for all,” I finished as I wrapped my arms around him.
The healing process with my father was going to take time. It was going to be more than one conversation, more than ten conversations. I knew it might take years, knew we might never return to being the father and daughter we’d once been, but having something was better than nothing.
At the end of the day, family was worth fighting for, scars and all.
When I went back to meet up with Greyson at the car, Dad came with me. He was going to stay with us a few days before heading back to Florida, just so he and I could get a conversation started toward the healing of our relationship.
That night as I climbed into bed with Greyson, I held him closer than I’d ever held him before. “You did this for me?” I asked, speaking about bringing my father back into my life.
“Of course, I did, Ellie. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do to make sure you were happy.”
“Grey?”
“Yes?”
“Would it be all right if I kept you forever? I know I said that before, but like, really this time? Can I keep you?”
“Yes, Ellie.” He chuckled lightly, and kissed my forehead as both of our eyes began to shut. “I’m yours.”
60
Eleanor
It had been almost a year since Greyson and I decided to let our love story grow, and it was a beautiful story to partake in. Our words intermixed as if they were made for one another.
On Monday nights we ate spaghetti, on Tuesdays we watched Mr. Rogers, and then we formed new traditions for our future.
Life became easier. Even though my father went back to Florida, he checked in more often. We talked more, and when he said he would visit, he actually came. He was putting forth the effort, and I was more than thankful for that.
When months passed, and he showed up for Christmas, I was amazed.
“Can we open gifts?!” Lorelai shouted darting into the living room on Christmas day.
Claire, Shay, and I had just finished preparing brunch together while the guys all sat in front of the television, watching sports. Landon even stopped by for Christmas brunch, stating that he was simply in the neighborhood again. I knew how much it meant to Greyson for his best friend to be there, and if there was anything Landon was excellent at, it was showing up. He always showed up whenever Greyson needed him.
Even though he wasn’t great for my cousin, he was the best kind of best friend.
“After we eat and make our wish ornaments,” Claire told Lorelai, who groaned about not being able to rip open her presents yet.
Shay walked past me in the kitchen after peeking her head into the living room to look at the guys for the fifteenth hundred time. Or, mainly to look at Landon.
“You know what I hate most in this world?” she asked me.
“What’s that?”
“Landon Harrison. I mean, can you believe that? When I showed up today he had the nerve to say, ‘Merry Christmas,’ to me. Can you believe that asshole?”
I snickered. “How rude.”
“Exactly! It’s like he’s trying to play some crazy mind games.” She huffed as her cheeks reddened. She was so flustered around him. It was actually pretty cute.
“Or maybe he simply meant Merry Christmas,” I offered.
She lowered her eyebrows, going deep into thought. “Yeah, maybe. Maybe that’s it. Okay, yeah. It was just a Merry Christmas. Nothing more, nothing less.”
Just then Landon popped his head into the kitchen and gave a big smirk. “Need any help in here, ladies?” he asked.
“You cook?” Shay asked, sassily with her hands against her hips.
“Yeah, sometimes.”
“Why do I find that so hard to believe?” she mocked.
“I don’t know, but if you give me a few minutes, I’m sure I can bring some nice sausage into your life.” He winked her way, making me chuckle.
Shay groaned. “You’re disgusting.”
“I’m just saying, it will probably be the best meat you’ve had in a while. And if memory serves me right, which it does, you kind of already told me how much you loved my sausage.”
“Shut up, Landon,” Shay hissed, turning redder than ever. “You’re so cocky.”
He smirked, pleased with how he was getting under her skin. “I know, right?”
“Oh, piss off, Landon,” she breathed out, hitting him with a dish rag, making him hurry away.
She stayed flustered as she combed her hair behind her ears. “What a dick,” she muttered. “I can’t wait until he goes back to California.”
“I can’t wait for season one, episode one of the Landon and Shay show,” I joked. “I love a solid enemies-to-lovers storyline.”
She pointed a stern finger at me. “That will never in the history of ever happen. Never.”
A part of me knew she was lying, though. Shay and Landon had this intense game of cat and mouse they played together, and for some reason I felt as if the story between the two of them was just beginning.
Once the food was prepared, we all gathered around the dining room table, and feasted on the meal. There was so much chatter, laughter, smiles, and peace going around the table setting, and it warmed up every part of me. After the meal, Claire handed out pieces of paper, and clear, glass ornaments.
She had the idea of making wishes for the upcoming year. In the clear, glass spheres, you were supposed to place a wish for the year to come. Then when the year was over, you opened the ornament and you’d be able to see how your wish had come true. Then, you’d use paint to decorate the ornament however you wished.
As everyone sat there decorating with looks of joy on their faces, I sat back in my chair, in complete awe.
This was it.
This was all I’d ever wanted. All I wanted was this moment. All I wanted was this family. All I wanted was us.
As I put my wish for the coming year in place, I thought about the words I’d written down about what I hoped for. I looked around at the happiness surrounding me, and I felt beyond blessed.
This was all I wanted for the upcoming months.
More.
More happiness, more laughter, more smiles.
More of him, more of me, more of us.
Greyson pushed his chair away from the table, and cleared his throat as he stood up. “Hey, everyone, I just wanted to take a moment to thank you all for coming out today. You have no clue what it means to me and the girls to have each chair at this table filled. There was a time where I thought we’d never get this back. There was a time I thought happiness was gone forever, but then a light came back into my life, and everything changed. So, I just wanted you all to be here when I show my gratitude to the woman who saved my family, to the woman who saved me.”
My heart skipped a beat as he turned toward me and reached into his back pocket, pulling out a small box. He then lowered himself down to one knee.
“Greyson, what are you doing?” My voice shook and tears floated my eyes.
“Ellie, you are everything good in this world. You’ve treated my daughters with nothing but love. You’ve respected the time we needed to heal. You showed up whenever we needed you. You’ve always been there, even when you had every reason in the world to walk away. You stand for peace in the chaos. You are the sunbeams breaking through the clouds. You are the definition of happiness, and that’s all I’ve ever wanted. I wanted to be happy. Which is why I want to spend the rest of my life in the arms of you.” He opened the box, showing me a beautiful engagement ring. I gasped as I studied it. Tears began falling down my cheeks as my emotions became unsteady.
The ring was a series of small diamonds shaped like a dragonfly.
As I looked over at Greyson, he smiled.
I loved it.
Whatever.
“Eleanor Gable, you are my heartbeats, my laughter, and my love. Will you marry me?” he asked, but before I could reply, my heart began to cry even more as Lorelai hurried over, holding a small box in her hands, too.
“And me?” she asked, getting down on one knee. She opened the box and showed me another dragonfly ring.
Karla walked over next, and got down on one knee beside her sister. She opened her ring box next. “And me?”
My heart was exploding into a million pieces. The three of them and their love was what made this life of mine whole.
With ease and so much love, I replied to each of them. “Yes, yes, a million times yes,” I cried as the room burst into celebration.
Greyson placed the ring on my finger, and then he pulled me into a tight embrace, holding me closer than ever. He kissed me deeply, and I felt forever against his lips.
Forever.
This kiss means forever.
As he pulled back, he smiled, and I smiled back.
“More of that, Ellie,” he said as he leaned in and kissed my lips once more.
Yes, exactly.
More of that.
The end.
Acknowledgments
This book would’ve never happened if it wasn’t for my mother. I almost gave up on this story after having an emotional breakdown over it. I almost threw it all away, but my mother looked at me and told me to keep going, to trust myself, to trust the process. So, this book exists because of her love and endless support. Thank you, Mama. You’re my best friend.
This book is for my family, who always has my back no matter what. They love my fully—always and forever.
This book is for the man I love: More of you, more of me, more of us. More of that.
Thank you to Hang Le for the most amazing cover design I’ve ever had! I’m still blown away whenever I look at it.
Eleanor & Grey Page 31
