A Cowboy SEAL's Bride

by Amity Lassiter

  “Mr. Sutton, to what do I owe the pleasure of this visit?” she asked teasingly.

  “I just thought I’d see if you wanted to come see what I got.”

  “I’m baking cookies.”

  “You got any in the oven right now?”

  She shook her head. “I just finished a bowl of dough and was about to start another round.”

  “Great, then you need a break.”

  “Ten minutes. Let me turn the oven off.” Moving back through the house, she turned off the oven and stripped off her mother’s well-worn apron, pausing long enough as she went back to the door to check for flour on her face in the hall mirror.

  “I can’t promise it’ll only be ten minutes once you see what I got.”

  She raised a brow, but followed him down the stairs to his truck, where Kit occupied the passenger seat.

  “I’ll just bring my car?” she suggested.

  “Don’t be silly, there’s lots of room in the truck.”

  She swung a skeptical face in his direction, but he crossed around the front and opened the passenger door.

  “You know the drill, Kit,” he said to dog. She hesitated, but then scooted into the middle of the seat.

  “I’m impressed.” Miranda climbed up into the seat while Lane held the door, closing it gently behind her. He leaned in through the open door with a grin.

  “She’ll accept any excuse to sit in the girlfriend seat.”

  She laughed out loud, shaking her head. Of course, the middle of a bench seat in a truck. She hadn’t heard the term used in at least a decade, but she’d remembered sitting there in Lane’s truck when she was sixteen, and she’d been enjoying the spot lately in Kit’s absence.

  The drive up to Lone Oak’s cabin was short, and Miranda noticed the difference right away. The small paddock Jack had erected across the driveway from the house was occupied by Gunner and Shorty, and two big bays ate hay in a newly-arrived metal round pen.

  Miranda couldn’t help the smile that spread over her features.

  “You brought the horses home.”

  “I brought the horses home,” he said, as he put the truck in park and opened his door. “Come meet the girls.”

  Kit followed Lane out his door and Miranda let herself out her side, following the pair over to the round pen.

  A big, full-hipped bay with a dainty head and feminine features wandered over at the first sign of company. Miranda stretched her hand out and the horse’s velvety muzzle brushed over her palm, clearly looking for a treat.

  “Somebody’s spoiled.”

  “Well, you should have brought something,” Lane said, producing a pink peppermint from the pocket of his jeans and handing it to her.

  “I would have brought cookies if I had known.” She opened her palm flat with the offering in the middle and the mare took it ever-so-gently. It had always amazed Miranda how soft horses could be with those practically prehensile lips. The horse’s upper lip curled up like she was smiling, and Miranda laughed. “What a sweetheart.”

  “This is Brandy,” Lane said, indicating the mare who was snuffling for a second treat. “And that’s May. Neither one had a foal this year but they’re both bred so this time next year, we should have some little long-legged ones running around.”

  “You’ll have a regular herd.”

  “I have cattle coming from Anderson’s next week. I need the horses to ride the fence and make sure everything’s in working order.”

  “You know the fields are accessible by truck, right?”

  “What kind of cowboy would I be then?”

  Cowboy. The thought made Miranda smile.

  “Anyways, you wanna come in for a beer?”

  “That’s definitely gonna take more than ten minutes.”

  “You know you want to. Those cookies can wait.”

  She let out a breath, slid her phone out of her pocket to check the time, and then glanced at him. The cookies could wait. Eventually he’d get busy with the ranch stuff and she’d have kids again, and they wouldn’t have the time to just spend together like this.

  “So are you volunteering to come help me finish them in the morning?”

  “Are there cookie perks to helping?”

  She’d earmarked an extra dozen for him anyways, but she nodded. “Unless you have something more important to do than help me and eat cookies.”

  “There is nothing more important than helping you and eating cookies,” he said solemnly.

  —THIRTEEN—

  “Will you stay tonight?”

  Lane pulled Miranda close, brushing a bit of hair out of her eyes. Her eyes were closed, a small smile lifting the corners of her lips as she worked to catch her breath. She stretched like a cat, rubbing the length of her naked body against his. If she wasn’t careful, they were going to go for round two. And here all he’d asked her for was ten minutes to show her the horses. This couldn’t have worked out better if he had planned it.

  “You always ask that.”

  “I like having you here.”

  “I like being here. And I can be because I don’t have any kids right now. If I had kids in…”

  “I know. So while you can, will you stay?”

  She opened her eyes and looked at him, just the deepest flecks of green pigment in her irises catching the light of the lamp by the bedside. It was late. Too late, really, for her to go home. And maybe it was a little selfish the reason why he wanted her to stay, but on top of that, he liked her being around.

  “Yes. To hell with the cookies.”

  He squeezed her close, pressing a kiss to her forehead. “Thank you.”

  There was a stretch of quiet between them, then she lifted her head to catch his eyes again. “You can tell me.”

  “What do you mean?” Lane’s heart kicked into a thundering pace almost immediately.

  “Why it’s so important that I stay. Why Kit watches you at night like she’s afraid you’re going to stop breathing.”

  He pressed his lips together, dropping his head back on the pillow so he didn’t have to look her in the eye. He should have known she’d figure it out eventually. It wasn’t something he was proud of; if he was honest, it made him feel less of a man. He couldn’t even do his job because he couldn’t control his mind in his most vulnerable hours—and that had so affected him at one point that he’d considered killing himself. That’s not what a strong SEAL did. It had been a long, hard spiral, especially after the discharge, and he’d been lucky his mother had caught it when she did and turned him around, suggesting professional help and a therapy dog like she’d seen on Youtube.

  “There are…nightmares.”

  “You seem fine in the morning,” Miranda said, matter-of-factly. She turned onto her side, sliding her hand over his abs to tickle her fingers through the hair just a bit lower, and bringing her head to rest on his folded bicep. The ring he’d put on her finger glinted in the light. He didn’t regret giving it to her for one second, and he was thankful to finally see what it looked like after all these years—though the minute she conceded to marry him for real, he’d head straight for a jeweler and buy her a proper ring—one she deserved. She deserved a stronger man, too, but he didn’t feel that conviction strongly enough to kick her out of his bed. He’d just make up for it in other ways, as much and as often as he could.

  “That’s because you’re here. When you’re not, they’re bad. But manageable, that’s what Kit’s for.”

  She drew in a breath and lifted her head, her hand moving from his stomach to his jaw, her fingertips catching on the day’s worth of stubble there. Her eyes were sad.

  “I’ve seen awful things with the foster kids Myrna brings me…but you’ve seen things I can’t imagine.”

  He swallowed and nodded. They were things even he hadn’t been able to imagine when he’d enlisted. Villains and missions and motives that would never cross a civilian mind. And he would have been glad if they didn’t cross his mind now at all, but that didn’t happen
. So he coped the way he could…which, today, was asking Miranda to stay with him.

  She brought her lips to his, brushing gently at first, just a feather of a kiss. He slid his fingers over the nape of her neck, into her hair, drawing her down for more when she pulled away. He broke the kiss after a moment, but held her still, so close their lips almost brushed when he spoke.

  “Marry me. I need you. We already put in the time as kids, and we’ve wasted so much time in between. This is worth doing, Miranda. I promise it is.”

  She drew a breath, hesitating.

  “I know you say this is what you want, Lane, but I’m worried you’ll be disappointed.”

  “You could never disappoint me,” he said without missing a beat, stroking her hair in an effort to soothe her. Was that what was making it so hard for her to say yes? He’d worried she’d run when he told her about the nightmares, but here she was. There wasn’t anything he could tell her that would make him change his mind at this point.

  “You want to get married and have kids.”

  “I want to get married, and we’ll figure out the rest. But kids, yes, could be in the plans—if that’s what you wanted.”

  Miranda squeezed her eyes shut and let that breath out.

  “It’s what I want but I can’t make it happen. It’s why Harvey and I didn’t work out. It’s why I spend so much time with those kids Myrna brings me.”

  He touched her jaw, drawing back so he could meet her eyes. It turned out nobody came out of this life without getting at least a little broken.

  “It doesn’t matter to me. What I want is you, a life with you, and whatever else that brings or doesn’t bring.”

  A furrow appeared between her brows and she let out a soft breath. “And everybody will think I just want the ranch for the camp.”

  “Nobody knows about Granddad’s stipulations but me, ‘Randa. And I’ll know the truth. The truth is all that matters.”

  “Oh hell, you’re not going to give up until I say yes, are you?”

  He shook his head.

  “Fine, then. We’ll get married.”

  —FOURTEEN—

  Miranda yawned and checked the clock. Only two thirty. Any decent day, she’d be perfectly energetic for her shift manning the front desk at town hall, but she’d been up late last night with Lane celebrating her coming to his terms—for the third night straight. He’d been jubilant, and it had kept her up three quarters of the night. This morning, she felt good about the decision. Afterall, they did love each other, and they had for a long time. Getting to open her camp was a great side perk, but the more she had settled into the idea of Lane being around again, discovering all of his new little personality quirks and rediscovering the old ones she loved so much, the more she knew they were making the right choice.

  She smiled, thinking of Lane. He’d be moving his cattle home today. They’d spent the day before riding and repairing the fence on the back forty. Just doing those little things together had felt so amazing, building a life and recovering the ranch and making her camp happen were going to be good things, she knew it.

  The bell over the door tinkled and Miranda looked up. Anna Sanderson waved with a smile. She’d gone to school with the girl and they’d both had big plans to leave Three Rivers. Both of them non-starters. There was a certain solidarity in being small town failures together. Anna worked for the town’s one lawyer, who leased a part of one of the town-owned buildings for his practice, which meant Miranda saw Anna on a monthly basis. It was always a nice time to catch up and share some gossip.

  “Hey, I wondered if I’d see you today.” Miranda said with a smile.

  “Office was quiet so I took off for the afternoon. How are you doing?” Anna took the rent cheque from her purse and slid it across the desk. When Miranda reached for it, the other girl’s jaw dropped, her eyes fixated on the ring on her left ring finger. She seized Miranda’s hand to examine the jewelery. “Ohmigod, you said yes!”

  Miranda blushed, but smiled. She knew it would get around eventually—people knew Lane was back in town again, people knew their history, and suddenly, after not dating anyone for years, she showed up with a diamond on her left hand—but she hadn’t thought it would get around this quickly. Anna had a good heart but she loved to talk, and most of the time, Miranda enjoyed the gossip…just not when it was about her.

  “I did.”

  “When’s the big day?!” Anna asked, leaning forward—this was her ‘get the gossip’ face. Miranda supposed working in Morgan’s Law Office was a good spot to pick up on the gossip, though she was supposed be be bound by client confidentiality. Nothing was ever a secret in Three Rivers.

  “Oh, this is new…we haven’t picked a date yet. Maybe in the fall when things quiet down on the ranch.”

  “So you decided to share the ranch after all, huh?”

  “What do you mean, decided to share? I think that was Lane’s decision either way,” Miranda said with a nervous chuckle, but she couldn’t help feeling like she was about to have an atomic bomb dropped on her.

  “Well, I mean I guess it makes sense. That’s a lot of ranch for one woman on her own.”

  “Anna,” Miranda said, narrowing her friend in her eyes and enunciating clearly. “Tell me what you’re talking about.”

  “The land title made out to you for next year.”

  “I’m still not following.”

  “The one you got to sign if you and Lane didn’t marry.”

  Miranda’s mind spun so quickly she could barely form words.

  “What do you mean the one I got to sign if we didn’t marry?”

  Anna closed her lips tight, and her brows rose, realizing her misstep. Miranda leaned forward, urgent. “Anna, you had better tell me everything you know and leave nothing out.”

  ~

  Miranda rolled into Lone Oak in a cloud of dust, sliding as she braked hard. Lane was in the yard, putting hay in with his broodmares in the round pen. He turned and lifted his hand in a greeting she barely saw through the blur of tears.

  She should have known better. Nobody worked as hard as he had to convince someone from ten years ago to marry them after only being together again for a few weeks. Not unless they wanted something substantial out of it. Especially when the someone from ten years ago was as broken and incapable of being a wife as she was. It was easy to fall into what they had because it was familiar, like an old shirt she loved putting on because it fit her body just the way it was supposed to. She’d thought he’d turned into a respectable and noble man, but it turned out he’d gone the other way, hard. Letting out a heavy breath, she put her Jeep in park and killed the engine, climbing out.

  Lane’s smile died on his lips as she stormed toward him. He shifted, like he wanted to reach out to her when he saw her tears but thought better of it.

  “Why didn’t you tell me about the land deed?” Might as well cut to the chase. She was already hurting as much as she could and she couldn’t fathom that he’d be able to say anything to cut her any deeper.

  His face rearranged a number of times before he spoke.

  “I wasn’t sure it mattered. Things were going so well between us.”

  “Right. Well, as in you were going to get everything you wanted and I’d be none the wiser that there were other options.” She wasn’t sure she would have taken those other options—she felt strongly that Lone Oak really belonged to Lane, no matter what his grandfather thought, but it would have been nice to know she was being led along instead of finding out from a third party.

  “That’s not—”

  “I love you, Miranda. I need you, Miranda. But what you really want is the ranch.”

  Lane pressed his lips together and reached a hand out for her but she stood firm with her arms crossed over her midsection. It didn’t do a thing to protect her but it did stop her from doing something stupid……like taking his hand…or punching him in the face.

  “Those parts are true, ‘Randa. I do love you. And I do need you.
You have no idea how much better my life has been since I landed here and you were digging in the flowerbed.”

  “You love and need this ranch, Lane. I’m the wrench in your plans.”

  “I do love and need this ranch, Miranda. But you’re not a wrench in my plans. If you hadn’t agreed, I would have given up and let you take it.” Lane’s voice was far more even than Miranda felt.

  “No way in hell.” She let out a short laugh, and shook her head. “I was fooling myself to think two people who loved each other once, when they were kids, could come back together after ten years and still feel the same way.”

  She could see it playing out now, the way people got about inheritances could be wild. Anna had told her stories. Disputing the mental capability of the benefactor, forcing power of attorney so they could divide the estate the way they wanted. She wasn’t sure what could be done after Jack was gone, but she could imagine it now. She would never have gotten the ranch; Lane would never have let her.

  Lane let out a long, ragged breath, betraying his quiet tone and neutral face.

  “I still feel the same way, Miranda. If you truly don’t, and you don’t believe me, there’s nothing I can do or say to force you to believe it.”

  “I don’t believe you.” A microscopic part of her wanted him to fight harder, but the rest of her knew just how foolish that was. Even if he did fight harder, even if they did work things out, there would come a time that it wouldn’t work—she’d be a disappointment he couldn’t live with—and the fight over the ranch would resume. It was devastating to let go of her dream of using Lone Oak as her camp, but it was better to avoid the end result altogether instead of just prolonging it. She worked the ring off her finger and held it out to him.

  “I wish you’d keep that,” he said, his voice quiet.

  “Why?” To remind myself how I’m too messed up to be anyone’s wife? How I’m too stupid to see a con when it’s plain as day in front of me?