You After Hell

by Manuela Ricci

  "What that means is up to you?" This is not ... there's Zac Noha, because they are together? Noha not stand Zac, in these two months that I was close has done nothing to reproach myself that I was attacked by one that is sold for money. What I could not expect more from a guy who came from the Valley. I swallowed hard all those words hurled at me, but it was the truth, he had accepted. This could not change anyone, even if my head repeated that he had done to his sister.

  This was the explanation that propinavo me to the memory of his voice imploring me to listen to him, to get him ... but the door is always locked. I gave a double ring of closing key himself in a far corner of my heart, with the hope that time would carry away the memory of him, of that kiss, and those chained to my eyes.

  "I repeat that the tests are normal, did not bat, fortunately my head violently to get her to this state ..."

  "Look ... try to be clearer, please," pronounces Zac's voice, I like the way it tends to bite his lower lip when he's nervous and I know that right now it sure does, I feel choked by I understand that barely comes the incessant beeping that fills my head.

  "I spoke to the family of your friend, so if you want more information talk to them," The noise like a door that closes tells me that probably the doctor left the room.

  'FAMILY ... Sure, why not? "Sarcasm Noha I also perceive the walls. In fact it has more than one reason to noticeably emphasize that word in my life was just a euphemism. It was Noha, during the worst of me who shouted against that, that one should lay father that his child had been raped and they in all this they did not understand anything, because they are too preoccupied with their social life.

  "Why do you say that?"

  "Because parents to Med, you never fucking a cock her. His family was Kylian ... and, well '... maybe I ... "I feel a sharp pain in his chest, his name is always hurt so much to hear. Knowing that there was, who until recently was with me, with his air of blowhard printed in the face, but beneath which lurked the purest soul and sweet that I've ever known. I wonder where he is now, while I'm here in anything myself.

  "Noha ..." my father? How did you give up the Yatch Club circle? They never came to me in the middle, even once. The school knew I was abroad by a distant relative, had this to my parents, a shame, maybe they were right, maybe they are actually really a shame.

  "Mr. Walker, what the doctors said?" He asks.

  "Who is he?" I'm sure he's eyeing Zac from head to foot. It does not use pole or starched shirts and this is the first alarm bell for my father.

  "I'm..."

  "It's Meddy boy," says Noha. But how it occurred? My father is rolling her eyes and shades of gray he will have gained the upper hand on blue of his eyes. I do not hear the voice of Zac replicate, I wonder what is waiting.

  "I did not know her ..."

  "There are many things you do not know your daughter, Mr. Walker," Noha sentences about it. How true, I wonder whether it is possible to live under the same roof, sharing the same meal and rarely attributed to everything the word family.

  "So you'd be?" My father is pressing authoritative tone.

  "Zac, Zac Kinney sir," I feel a warmth, light that comes as a tingling in the hand. The darkness begins to dissipate gradually letting the key changes from black to gray to white and finally see the blurred image of two green eyes.

  Zac

  The father of Med remains amazed by Noha answer, actually I am too. Do not deny it, my heart I do not give a chance. I grab with both arms this name that I have just been awarded, and keep it close to me, deciding not volermene more separate.

  I squeeze her hand highlights the Rolex on your wrist, another detail that defines his social position, in addition to the way you dress and poses for VIPs, while her daughter is unconscious in a hospital bed.

  Now I understand what he meant Noha, he has not come close to her to make her a caress, to reassure her that everything will be fine. How could I leave her alone against the one who is struggling? My eyes fall on her face. Eyes closed in an air that seems relaxed, her hair framing her face in a perfect portrait.

  I take her hand in mine, I want you to understand that I'm here, here for her, just for her. I make small circles with your thumb on the back, the hand movement mentions a slight, almost imperceptible. Abruptly, I search his eyes. The eyelids are moving slowly, I lean forward and I am overwhelmed by two ocean-blue eyes.

  "Hello", the only words I can not pronounce. Noha is approaching the other side of the bed.

  "I think that the way?" Quips and manages us well apparently, saw the smile that appears on the Medyson face. I turn around, I look at the man, his father, not detachment eyes until you move those feet cock and worthy to approach his daughter.

  "P-Daddy ..." dithers in utter those words that seem to have a different value on his mouth.

  "I'm glad you're better, I'm going to talk to the doctor," barely touches the blanket on the bed and leaves the room, taking away another piece of her. I see by his disappointed look, the hand withdraws from my grasp.

  "I ... slipped ..." admits and stroked his face.

  "It's okay, it is important that you're here with us," I look up to Noha and then add, "I go for a moment to make a phone call," he places a kiss on his forehead and I'm happy that she does not deviate from my gesture.

  Once in the hallway, I turn first right and then left and finally I see his white polo shirt, signed Ralph Loren, which runs undisturbed. I reach him at a brisk pace, without fear stopped his walk with the hand that encircles his shoulder.

  "Where is he going?" I ask with little polite way. His gaze travels from my face down.

  "Listen, kid ..." point your index finger at his face that portrays unexpected from my gesture.

  "Look you, you know how many I've seen people like her? Fathers, only to have deposited a signature on a piece of paper that bore witness? I grew up without a father, an alcoholic mother ... "

  "I do not care about your miserable existence" I grip his fists and serro jaw, if he was not the father of Med and if I would have done to him we were in a public place to see what happens to the scum like him in Queens.

  "You sure he is not interested?" Precise and without waiting for his answer I continue, "my mother is an alcoholic, because he succumbed to the weight of the suffering that has taken away every part of her. I, the son might never wanted to, what in front of his eyes, every day reminded him of what he had suffered! He wants that to happen to your daughter? What gets lost in alcohol and in itself? "

  Confused by my past remains in silence, as indeed I do too, poggiandomi the wall at my side. I never thought I'd have the courage to pull off what I've always tried to suppress myself not to give in to the weight of being the "fruit of violence"

  Chapter

  29

  Medyson

  "Too many times we find ourselves to be silent,

  to crack down on what we feel, that flows in the veins

  and that our heart would just yell "

  My father still has not returned from "talking with doctors" and will not return any time soon. I know the shame that showed her eyes and rested on me. That look was scratched on his face when he found out what had happened to me. There had existed gestures that had reassured me, encouraged. They had sent as a package to the recovery center. It had become my home in recent months, in which there was no place for them a phone call or a visit.

  The only one who came to see how he could, was Consuelo, she had long before realized that Meddy, so my father called me as a child, was gone. He had embarked on a journey, from which he did not know if there was ever return.

  My mother was being treated by a psychologist, do you? Of course, the protagonist was not levargliela anyone. I shake my head and I hope that with this gesture, those thoughts leave my head free.

  My body is a bit 'sore from the fall, I lever with your hands to try to put me down on the bed. Noha lasts up to me and gently helps me, I system the pillow behind his back.

  "That's all righ
t?"

  "Why did you say to my father that Zac's my boyfriend?" I say in my turn with a question. I know you should not, but I want to understand what you're getting.

  "Because? Would you tell me it is not so? I stand corrected, it will not be so? "I cross my arms over her chest and face look elsewhere. I know so well, that knows that for those green eyes would do anything, even forgive him. He leans his back against the wall and whistles on purpose. It irritates me and does so with intention.

  "I'm so pathetic?" I murmur not meet his gaze, in my question is the answer to her.

  "No. You're just in love with him, you're pathetic Med 'precise, I turn and see who keeps his eyes fixed to the outside of the glass. His profile is so ... sad, yes this is the right definition, it is sad and I know I will be the cause.

  "Are you mad?" Shrugs but does not respond, the door opens and Zac enters the room. His eyes are bloodshot, I'll go into a panic, a strange feeling comes over me.

  "Zac ..." raises his hand to me.

  "I'm fine!" I perceived my question did without him. Noha looks at us for a moment and after having said something in his ear Zac, greets me with a kiss on the cheek and promised to call me later.

  Zac approach me at the time that the door is closed and we are alone, just me and him.

  He sits in the edge of the bed, his hand takes mine and the door to his mouth, he kissed every part, the palm, knuckles. Her lips are so soft and smooth that the kisses are the most gentle caresses I have ever received.

  I feel that the face begins to show the embarrassment I feel at this moment.

  "I ..." I try to speak but his hand covering my mouth, which is approaching letting only one hand to separate at that time.

  "Not now, we will talk about many things, but not now," reassures me in a whisper blowing light those words on my face. Leave slid his hand away, only his thumb playing with her bottom lip. I close my eyes and I feel in a special place. A place made just for us. His lips pressed against mine. I welcome its flavor, with small movements, his lips hold my lower lip. I feel his tongue to caress the surface, it is a warm touch, moist, its licorice flavor mixed with the coffee bring me back to our first kiss.

  Hands trembling, seeking his hair, find them and play there, as if they were something new, to discover, to feel, to want to store not to forget. His tongue slides gently into my mouth, I go toward him, our flavors mingle, join in an endless dance. A kiss that tastes like love, fear, anger ... it's all there, in a single kiss. The stomach shrinks, the heart takes flight to an unknown destination, but I will not be afraid, not now, not with him.

  Slowly his lips away from mine, his forehead resting on my eyes and my fetter.

  "Together," this is his word that looks more like a promise. Together, as if to say there will succeed. I do not know if there is the will if I ever get out of it by this vortex that is sucking me. I am certain of only one thing, that I want to try and I want to do it with him by my side.

  I have so many questions to ask him, of Cox, on that certain Eddy called it, the reason for his appearance had just returned to the room, but I respect her, not now, and I would simply put her head on his shoulder and shake to him.

  "Together," I whisper, feel his hands caressing my hair and his head moving from side to my nodding.

  Zac

  Her hair know honey, it may seem too sweet, but it's just perfect matching that of its skin. I hold her against his chest, I do not want to let her go. I want to be the one to take care of her, I his family. I shall be able? I do not know but I will fight every day for a smile, to make them rediscover the beauty of her, because her nightmares turn into dreams which will no longer be afraid.

  I close my eyes and I still lose a moment in his scent. I want to take it with me when I am with her.

  "I have to go," he rises and looks at me bewildered, can not stand to see that look that darkens his eyes, giving only to the panic room.

  "I'll come right away, promised," I assure her, "you refreshed while, okay?" I add and help to lie down, to tuck in and see her so helpless, fragile and no longer master of his body and his mind, I feel the anger that enters the bloodstream through my veins. It flows together with my blood reaches the brain and what projects in the head is just that face.

  I kiss his forehead, he goes down on the tip of the nose up to his lips.

  "I'll wait 'ruling against mine.

  "See you later," I go out without looking back, without a gesture that makes me think. Ian I call and ask him to stay with Daphne I have to do. I reach the parking lot and I realize to be walking. Shit, I curse and walked toward the curb. Without a cab and I do bring to your destination. All the way his knuckles hurt me, as fists are tight. I just feel a blind rage mounted along the spine, feel the old me emerge from the ditch where I had buried, I feel that a part of me will stray into the night too dark to be seen, too chaotic to be listening, I just feel the deadly desire that I pumping through veins razing to the ground the reason that dissipates my every breath.

  The taxi parked in front of a large wrought iron gate. Pago race and go downstairs. I ring the intercom and wait with a calm that seems to envelop me like a blanket hiding the demon who begins to scream inside me.

  "Yup?"

  "It's me, Zac!"

  The gate opens followed by a slight electronic noise, I turn briefly behind me, because I know that everything will change from then on, once you cross that threshold will not return back. One step after another adorned the avenue of green lawns, manicured and blooming plants, brings me in front of the door of fine wood. The door opens before he can knock, he, in his rich outfit, holding a glass of liquor in front of me.

  To the mind pass only those images, those of his hands on her, those which may have been its cries of despair and all hell he did to try. I am convinced that I will not go back, I'm exactly where I want to be, where I should be.

  Chapter

  30

  Zac

  "Often, the coincidences are just

  the scars of the fate that awaits us "

  I run almost lose breath, my heart wants to come out of myself out of my chest, feet sock combined with despair the asphalt below. I feel the weight of each step, your breath will break into your lungs until you see the d 'entrance gate, the lights on I do understand that they are still awake, I do soon, repeated my mind, the reason I left him elsewhere. I opened the door, Daphne is lying on the couch, Ian beside her, lifting all 'standing meeting coming on.

  "What's up?" He asks, frowning

  "We must go, 'I say breathlessly, I rush into my sister's room, I open the cabinet doors, take your suitcase and begin to fill his clothes, under the puzzled look of my best friend.

  "Zac ... what happened?" Continuous undisturbed without paying attention to his presence, his questions, I have no time, no time, I screwed up, I just have to take her to safety. That's what I tell myself, I have to take away Daphne before it's too late.

  Ian's hand grab mine, then looks at his gaze also falls on the other. The conditions in which they are reduced say a lot, scraped knuckles, blood pesto who stopped off along the skin while I headed here, leaving its traces on jeans.

  "I'm fine cock, help me!" I plead as I think I have ever done in my life. He surrenders to the answers do not come and take all you can and puts it in your suitcase. I run to my room, Daphne silently in the living room walls do not ask anything, just look at her for a moment, that was not what I promised. I grab things with which I came into this house, leaving hanging in the closet the other clothes that do not belong to myself. I take my laptop and my music and I go back into the living room.

  "Loading the machine" command, Ian does not blink and does exactly as I asked. I know always knows that I would act as if it were not important.

  "Baby ... we have to go," I say to my sister, my tone of voice was calm when I see his face, she never asked for anything but only to live peaceful, and now, I am deprived of this too. I do not I will never forgive.

  "What
have you done?" Asks almost in a whisper, as his eyes scan my wounds, his slender hand, take my in her, touches the bruised knuckles, no longer feel the pain, but then his touch, I feel all the pain that at this moment my heart, against the blue eyes of a stormy sea.

  "Not now, I'll explain everything calmly, promised, but now we have to go," Ian returns home, tells me that the machine is ready and we can leave. I think about what we can ...

  "You can stay, I do not put you in the middle of my mess'

  "I'm coming with you!" Points out and I see his eyes overcome me and it remained on her, Daphne. I turn around, I look at my sister and then my best friend again. I threw at him, slam him with his back against the wall behind him, holding his fist in tight knit.

  "You can not have done it," cry against his face, the Daphne screams dominate mine, it's just his voice to make me stop.

  "Zac ... Just do not touch it!" I look at her, his voice cracks, tears streaming down her sweet face and fatigue continues, "you were so taken by your life that you did not notice ... us .... we wanted to tell you ... "

  "We? Of what we're talking about, you can not tell Daphne seriously»

  "You're so upset by the idea that someone could love me as I am? What someone sees beyond my illness? That someone can take care of me besides you? What Zac? What do not you understand? I also want to live I want to love, be loved, even suffer for love, but I want to have the right to prove all this until my last breath leaves my body. "Her words weigh on the heart of a brother who just wants to protect her, my ears will not listen, my eyes can not believe what they failed to do in recent months. Is it possible that I got so much from myself, not to realize that among them there was something that went beyond mere friendship?

  "You were my best friend!" I point, pointing with a finger, it seems almost a weapon against his body.

  "We are still, nothing has changed," pronounces with disdain, not realizing that she can not, must not suffer and can not be the one to make her feel quell'emozioni. The ringing of my phone breaks the speech that remains suspended in the air by now so heavy to hear press on his shoulders.