Love or Lust 2

by Rachael Brownell

  I wonder if I can quit. I mean, it’s pretty late in the game. It would be like throwing away money at this point. Plus, the girls can’t vote me off, and I get along with all the guys. I feel safe for the most part. Even after screwing up dinner pretty bad last night, I didn’t get the impression that Drake was ready to vote me off.

  “Well, she can try for him. You can try for him. Nothing in this game is guaranteed. He could be gone in a few days, or I could. Maybe it’ll be Teegan. Whoever goes home on Sunday, it changes the entire dynamic of how this game is played. I know people are trying to make alliances. I’m not one of them. I’m not using Jace or Lennon to get to the finish line. Hell, I didn’t even want to be here at first.

  “So, don’t worry about them, Bella. I’m not going to. Go for who you want to go for. Have fun. Most importantly, make sure you’re just being yourself. The last thing you want is to fall in love with someone who doesn’t really know the real you.”

  Bella is quiet the rest of the day as we follow Courtney and Teegan from store to store. The number of bags hanging from their arms grows exponentially while I’m clutching one bag with a gift for Naomi in it. That makes it easy to check my phone when I hear it chime.

  JACE: Guys are heading to a bar to listen to a live band play. Want to meet up with us?

  “Hey.” I pull Bella to a stop. “Want to go meet up with all the guys? They’re listening to a live band at some bar.”

  “Yes. Please, God, get me out of here.”

  ME: Bella and I are on our way. I’m gonna call an Uber. Shoot me the name of the bar or the address.

  “I’ve been ready to leave for two hours. I can’t believe they’re still shopping.” Bella lets out an exasperated breath as she takes a seat next to me to wait for the Uber. “I’m not a shopper. Never have been. Even when I was a teenager. I prefer to browse online. I only buy what I need, when I need it. I’ve never seen the point in owning twenty pairs of flip flops or twelve pairs of the same-color jeans.”

  “Me either, though I do have a bit of a purse fetish,” I admit, letting out a giggle at the thought of Bella getting a glimpse of my purse collection. Every color, every size, every style is represented. I have one for any occasion. Literally.

  My phone chimes with a notification of the Uber’s arrival just as Courtney calls our names. Pretending not to hear her, I slide into the car, Bella hot on my heels, but we’re not quick enough. Our attempts to evade Teegan and Courtney for the rest of the day have failed.

  When they find out we’re headed to meet the guys, they invite themselves along.

  When we arrive, they lead the way into the bar.

  When Jace offers to grab drinks for us, they’re the first two to speak up.

  It’s the Teegan and Courtney show.

  All I can do is roll my eyes at their childish behavior. I’m not going to fight with them. It’s not worth my time. Plus, I’ve already won the game.

  If I really wanted to be a bitch, I’d rub that in their smug faces. But that’s not me. Not how I want to be.

  Then Teegan pulls Jace into the seat next to her and begins to slowly run her fingertip up and down Jace’s arms. His eyes are locked on mine, but he doesn’t push her away. I know why. That doesn’t mean I’m not irate.

  “She’s doing it on purpose.”

  I’d been so focused on Teegan and Jace I hadn’t heard Lennon sit down next to me.

  “I’m aware,” I reply, averting my eyes and taking a sip of the drink Jace placed in front of me.

  “Jealousy doesn’t look good on you, Presley,” Lennon notes, relaxing back in his chair and clasping his hands behind his head.

  “It doesn’t look good on anyone,” I retort, finally making eye contact with him.

  I haven’t seen him since Monday night, and until this very moment, I didn’t realize how much I’d missed him. The way he looks at me. The effect he has on my body.

  Yes, I want Jace, but that doesn’t mean I’m blind. Lennon is attractive and sweet and going to make someone very happy one day. If Jace weren’t here, that someone could have been me.

  “You look tired,” I say as the lights dim around us.

  “I am.” Lennon breaks eye contact, looking over my shoulder toward the stage.

  Before I can ask him why, the lead singer introduces the band and the strum of an electric guitar vibrates off the walls.

  Tomorrow. We can talk tomorrow, I think to myself as I make an effort to avoid looking in Jace’s direction and enjoy myself.

  Chapter Twelve

  Day 27

  I’m a smart girl.

  Under normal circumstances, I’d like to believe I can read people fairly well.

  I recognize the tell-tale signs when someone is lying. Is scared. Nervous. Ready to run.

  I know better than to fall for people’s bullshit, especially when that’s all they’re selling.

  Still, I try to give people the benefit of the doubt. No one is perfect. We all make mistakes. PMS is a real thing.

  So that’s what I was trying to do.

  I was giving them a chance to redeem themselves after the havoc they caused while we were shopping. And again at the bar while we listened to the worst band I’d ever heard drone on for over an hour.

  I probably wouldn’t have if Bella hadn’t been with me.

  Like I said, I’m not stupid.

  Walking into the wolf’s den, alone, is never a good idea. No matter what kind of mood the wolf is in.

  “Breakfast was so good,” Bella says as we walk back to toward our villas.

  It was. The chef made personalized omelets for each of us. There was a variety of fresh fruit and juices. But what really made it for me was the coffee.

  How was I not aware they had an espresso machine? God, it’s been weeks since I’ve been able to visit my favorite coffee shop. There’s something about the smell of espresso that perks me up.

  Or maybe it’s all the sugary syrup that I put in the espresso.

  Caramel. Vanilla. Chocolate. Hazelnut.

  I’m a lover of all flavors. But my personal favorite? White-chocolate lattes.

  And that’s exactly what I asked for this morning.

  “It was nice to not have cold cereal or toast for a change. Plus, I think my toaster is broken.”

  “How do you break a toaster?”

  “Don’t ask me. All I know is that when I cooked for Drake the other night, the toast never popped up, and by the time I remembered, it was solid black and the toaster was smoking.”

  Bella covered her mouth as a giggle escaped.

  “I’m just glad things weren’t tense with the other girls.”

  Bella’s giggle faded as she slowed her steps. “You do realize that they’re up to something, right? I’m not sure what, but they’re plotting against you.”

  “I’m sure they are.”

  “So why even bother being nice to them? Why accept their invitation to breakfast? Why not just ignore them?”

  “How am I supposed to figure out what they’re up to if I avoid them?” I raise an eyebrow at a curious Bella.

  “Valid point but they were nice this morning. As nice as can be expected, I guess.”

  “Yup,” I state firmly as I start walking again, Bella falling in step with me. “Which means they’re plotting something big. Probably a way to get rid of me. I’m fairly certain Teegan is into Jace, and I know Courtney is interested in Lennon. With me out of the picture, they think they have a better chance, and they probably do. What they don’t realize is there’s no way to get rid of me. They have no control over it. Their only hope is to make an alliance with Drake and Milo. They need both of them, though.”

  Bella seems to think over what I’ve said as we reach my door. “Want to come in for another cup of coffee? It won’t be as good, but it has caffeine, and that’s all that matters sometimes.”

  “No thanks,” Bella says, turning and walking across the path to her villa. “I’m gonna go for a run and then lie by the
pool if you want to join me.”

  Shrugging my shoulder at her, Bella waves and then disappears inside her villa. I do the same, closing the door behind me and then leaning back against the cool surface.

  It’s hot out already today. It’s going to be close to ninety degrees. The last thing I want to do is be outside with the sun beating down on me. Even if the pool is right there to cool me down. I much prefer the cold air of my villa. I have the air conditioning set to a frigid sixty-five degrees.

  Plus, a little downtime would be a good idea. I haven’t talked to Naomi lately, and I need to catch her up on a few things.

  ME: You around to chat?

  NAOMI: Ten minutes. Just jumped out of the shower.

  ME: Call me when you’re ready.

  She sends back a thumbs-up emoji as I flop backward on my unmade bed.

  Looking around the room, I take note of all the little details. My underwear discarded near the door to the bathroom. My tank top next to it. One of the pillows from the bed is sitting in front of the open closet doors.

  This place is a mess. I haven’t picked up in a few days, which is very unlike me. Then again, I’ve been a little preoccupied with other activities. Like sneaking out to meet Jace. Or him barging in here to find me. Our cuddle session last night that turned into another sleepover. Which is why the bed isn’t made.

  Teegan was knocking on my door this morning before either of us were ready to get out of bed. Jace hid in the bathroom while all the girls waited in the living room for me to change so we could walk down to breakfast together. I was kind of hoping to find him still here when I returned.

  A girl can dream, right?

  It appears he slipped out after we left.

  My phone rings, causing me to jump. Naomi’s face is smiling up at me as I slide my finger across the screen. I miss my best friend. Since meeting, we’ve barely spent more than a few days apart. We would meet up for drinks at least a few times a week. Hit the gym together when we could. And as of recently, we live together which means coffee every morning. Being away from her is heartbreaking.

  I feel like a part of me is missing.

  The part that keeps me sane. My conscience. My better half.

  I know that’s the way you’re supposed to feel about someone you’re in love with, and I did feel that way about Wren at one point, but my relationship with Naomi is special. I’ve never had a friend like her before. Someone who I want to be completely honest with no matter what she may think of me or my actions.

  Because she’s not judgmental. She’ll give me her opinion but won’t make me feel bad.

  Her advice is spot on. Worth its weight in gold.

  But more than anything, it’s the complete acceptance of me that I love about her the most. Nothing will ever tear us apart. Not a guy. Not distance. Not even death because, even after one of us goes, the other’s memory will be carried on.

  I can hear the excitement in her voice as soon as she says hello. It’s not to talk to me, though. It’s this new guy she’s not telling me much about. She’s falling for him, and it’s scaring the crap out of her. She’s afraid if she says too much, something will go wrong. Like somehow she’ll jinx her situation by discussing it.

  I get it. Hell, I’m in the same boat.

  So I don’t push her. Not until I meet this guy. Which could happen next week or next month.

  Or, if something changes, not at all, which I hope is not the case. I haven’t heard her this happy about something or someone since she started her job. Teaching is all she’s ever wanted to do with her life.

  Shape young minds.

  Mold little people into upstanding students.

  Her passion makes her great at what she does. I sure as hell don’t possess the patience she has. I’d end up getting fired for saying the wrong thing in front of a child.

  We talk for over an hour, catching each other up on day-to-day life. I fill her in on Teegan and Courtney’s antics, and we share a good laugh over it. She agrees with me that they’re probably working on a plan to get rid of me. I can’t stop them, and I don’t plan to try, so I take Naomi’s advice and make a plan of my own.

  I’m going to go at them from a different angle. One they won’t see coming.

  I’m going to kill them with kindness. Be their friend. Hang out with them. Laugh at their stupid jokes.

  Keep your friends close and your enemies closer and all that shit.

  As soon as I hang up with Naomi, there’s a knock at my door. Lennon and Jace are both on my front step in nothing but swim trunks, their shirts draped over their shoulders.

  “Let’s swim,” Lennon says in lieu of a greeting.

  “It’s too damn hot to even be outside,” I groan.

  “Yes, but the water is perfect and Jace is mixing drinks,” he counters quickly.

  My eyes fall to Jace, and he’s sporting a wicked grin. One that says he’d rather stay inside and play with me, but that would make things a little obvious to the additional company we currently have.

  “Fine but don’t mix my drinks too strong.” When I point my finger at Jace, he only smiles bigger and tosses me a wink. “If Lennon’s dinner is burned tonight, it’ll be all your fault.”

  Lennon and Jace chuckle at me as I step aside and let them in. Ten minutes later my hair has been pulled into a tight knot on the top of my head and I’m wearing the tiniest swimsuit I own. It’s bright yellow and compliments my bronzing skin. Not that either of them is aware of that fact. I pulled a black coverup on over it to keep it concealed until we go to the pool.

  And who’s at the pool when we arrive? Everyone.

  Drake and Milo are floating around on pink flamingo rafts. Teegan, Courtney, and Bella are lounging off to the side, sunglasses in place, but I can feel their stare as we pass them, taking the loungers on the far side of Bella.

  “Who wants an ice-cold drink?” Jace calls out, and everyone raises their hand. “Grape, Raspberry, Cherry, or Watermelon?”

  As he takes drink orders, I take a seat on the edge of the pool and dip my feet in.

  Lennon wasn’t lying. The water feels perfect. Not too cold but still refreshing.

  “You gonna get in or just sit there and bake in that black dress thing?” Drake asks as he floats closer.

  “I’ll get in, but I wanna get used to the water first.”

  “Just jump,” Milo calls, paddling his raft over to where we are. “I’ve never understood why people take their time getting in. Once you’re in, it doesn’t feel as cold.”

  He has a point. As soon as your entire body is in the water, you acclimate faster. But it’s the initial shock of getting in that I hate.

  Pushing off the side, I pull the dress over my head, and there’s an immediate crash to my left. Once I toss the coverup on the lounger behind me, I look to where Jace is standing. At his feet is a puddle of blue liquid and shards of glass. He’s staring at me with lust in his eyes, and my body begins to heat from his gaze. So I do the only thing I can to cool myself off. I dive into the pool.

  “You really know how to make a statement, don’t you?” Lennon says as we’re plating food.

  I’ve been cooking for the last hour, and he’s been watching me. Giving me tips. I wasn’t as prepared for this meal as I thought. I’m praying I didn’t over or undercook anything.

  “What? It’s not like I was naked,” I protest as he scoops mashed potatoes onto his plate.

  “Yes, you kind of were, and you know it. I’m fairly certain the cameraman almost dropped his camera at one point.”

  Wiggling my eyebrows at him, he just laughs. As soon as we’re seated, I anxiously wait for him to slice into his steak. What does he do instead? Takes a giant bite of his corn on the cob. Followed by some mashed potatoes and then back to the corn.

  I wanted to eat ten minutes ago, but he said the steaks needed to “rest,” whatever that means.

  Finally poking at his steak, he smiles up at me. “It’s perfect.”

  “How
do you know? You haven’t even cut into it.”

  “You can tell by the feel.”

  Taking my hand, Lennon shows me a trick. He folds my finger in and shows me the difference between a well-done steak by squeezing the flesh between my thumb and pointer finger. The tension changes based on how many fingers are folded down and then he tells me to touch my steak.

  “Medium,” I guess, wrinkling my nose.

  “You would be correct. When you cut into it, it’s going to be warm and red. Go ahead.”

  Slicing through the center of my steak, I find that Lennon is right. I’ve cooked a perfectly medium steak, just the way he wanted them.

  “Back to that little bikini you were wearing . . .”

  Lennon’s voice trails off as his smile grows.

  “It’s not that tiny.”

  “It barely covered your nipples, not that I’m complaining. You looked gorgeous.”

  Gorgeous. Not hot. Not sexy. Gorgeous.

  “Well, thank you. I won’t be wearing it again any time soon. I don’t think the girls were very happy with me.”

  “Who cares? They’re just jealous. Let them be. It’s not your fault that we all enjoy your company. Hell, I’m pretty sure any of us would be happy as hell if you were the last one standing at the end.” I can see the sincerity in his gaze as it penetrates deep into my soul.

  “Well, if Teegan or Courtney have their way, I’ll be going home sooner rather than later.”

  “Yeah, I may have heard something about that.” He averts his eyes, focusing on cutting his steak.

  “Care to share with the rest of the room what you may or may not have heard?”

  “Let’s just say Courtney was pulling people aside and talking with them today.”

  “Did she pull you aside?” I ask, wondering how far she was willing to go to put their plan into motion.

  “Yeah, but she didn’t get far. As soon as I caught on to what she was asking, I dismissed her. Jace wouldn’t even talk to her when she tried after I told him what was going on.”