Sketches New and Old
Page 51
CHAPTER VI
[Scene--The Roman Capitol Ten Years Later.]
"Dearest Mary, this is the most celebrated statue in the world. This isthe renowned 'Capitoline Venus' you've heard so much about. Here she iswith her little blemishes 'restored' (that is, patched) by the most notedRoman artists--and the mere fact that they did the humble patching of sonoble a creation will make their names illustrious while the worldstands. How strange it seems--this place! The day before I last stoodhere, ten happy years ago, I wasn't a rich man bless your soul, I hadn'ta cent. And yet I had a good deal to do with making Rome mistress ofthis grandest work of ancient art the world contains."
"The worshiped, the illustrious Capitoline Venus--and what a sum she isvalued at! Ten millions of francs!"
"Yes--now she is."
"And oh, Georgy, how divinely beautiful she is!"
"Ah, yes but nothing to what she was before that blessed John Smith brokeher leg and battered her nose. Ingenious Smith!--gifted Smith!--nobleSmith! Author of all our bliss! Hark! Do you know what that wheezemeans? Mary, that cub has got the whooping-cough. Will you never learnto take care of the children!"
THE END
The Capitoline Venus is still in the Capitol at Rome, and is still themost charming and most illustrious work of ancient art the world canboast of. But if ever it shall be your fortune to stand before it and gointo the customary ecstasies over it, don't permit this true and secrethistory of its origin to mar your bliss--and when you read about agigantic Petrified man being dug up near Syracuse, in the State of NewYork, or near any other place, keep your own counsel--and if the Barnumthat buried him there offers to sell to you at an enormous sum, don't you buy.Send him to the Pope!
[NOTE.--The above sketch was written at the time the famous swindle ofthe "Petrified Giant" was the sensation of the day in the United States]