Wanting to Love You (Houston's Finest Book 3)

by Erin Rylie

  “You’re on. When I win though, I want you to admit you’re a little bitch.”

  Carlos scoffed. “Deal.”

  With Rafe as their judge and spotter, the two of them began competing. Set by set they increased the weight on their barbells. When they got up to a hundred and seventy-five pounds each, Reese began to feel the sweat beading on his forehead and the burn in his arms. The familiar burn felt good, and he knew that he could push harder. On a good day, he could bench press two hundred and fifteen pounds. If he really needed to, he would guess he could hit two-thirty before needing to tap out.

  As Rafe added more weight to their barbells, Reese looked over at his partner. Carlos smirked back, looking calm and not the least bit overexerted. What the fuck? He usually only lifts one-sixty when we work out together. We’re coming up on two hundred pounds and he doesn’t even look worried.

  “Feeling a little tired over there, Princess? You’re looking kind of sweaty. You can tap out at any time, you know.”

  Reese glared back and took a deep breath before starting another set, this time with a hundred and ninety pounds on his barbell. When Carlos completed his set with practiced ease, suspicion began to creep into Reese’s mind. He wouldn’t put it past his friend to plan and set up a bet months in advance. Maybe he’d been setting Reese up for a while, lifting less than him in their gym sessions so that Reese would underestimate Carlos.

  When they hit two hundred and fifteen pounds, Reese really began to feel the burn, his muscles aching and sweat gathering on his forehead and in the small of his back. Still, Carlos looked comfortable. He was sweating, sure, but the bastard had a shit-eating grin on his face as Rafe upped the weight to two-twenty.

  The last set was almost too much for Reese, and he knew he’d been played when Carlos continued to smile as Rafe added more weight to their barbells.

  “You fucker!”

  Rafe and Carlos both burst out laughing. “You have no idea how hard he’s been working to beat you. Ever since you said your dick was bigger than his biceps, he’s been pushing his weight training. He set your ass up, Petrov.”

  Reese sat up on the bench, raising his hands and conceding defeat. “Fine. You fucking win.”

  Carlos stood quickly and ran a lap around Reese and Rafe, singing, “We Are the Champions” at the top of his lungs. Though the gym was relatively empty, everyone left in the large room turned to stare. It wasn’t every day you saw a grown-ass man in a pink singlet running around the gym singing.

  “Admit you’re my bitch.”

  “No sir, that wasn’t part of the bet. I owe you one no-questions-asked favor. You calling it in already?”

  Carlos smiled. “Actually, I am. See, I’ve decided that it’s finally time for me to take a wife.”

  Rafe groaned in response. “Who the fuck says that, dude?”

  “I do, duh. I’m asking Kelsey to marry me next weekend. Kyle has custody of the little one, Dillon helped me score a reservation at a restaurant I know Kels has been dying to go to, and I’ve had this bad boy waiting for months.”

  Carlos produced a small ring-sized box, shoving it in Reese’s hands. “Do I even want to know where the fuck you pulled this from? You’re all sweaty, and that singlet doesn’t really have any hiding places.”

  “Oh, just open it, you big baby.”

  Reese pried open the small box and had to admit that his partner had chosen the ring well. It was a vintage-looking sapphire ring, cut into a square and surrounded by small diamonds on a thin band.

  “Congratulations, man. I’m really happy for you. Are you sure she’ll say yes?”

  Carlos brushed imaginary dirt off his shoulder. “Of course I am. The woman is obsessed with me.”

  Rafe snorted but didn’t say anything.

  “This is great, Carlos, but what the fuck does it have to do with our bet and the favor I now owe you?”

  “Well, Rafey-poo here is obviously going to be my best man,” Carlos replied, slapping his best friend on the shoulder. “I want you to be a groomsman, though. The only groomsman, really. I’m guessing Kelsey’s bridesmaids will be Sophie and Becky, so I only need a best man and one groomsman. She told me that when she gets married again she wants a small wedding.”

  Reese felt a tightening in his chest. He’d only ever been in his brother’s wedding, and had never really been close enough to anybody in Dallas to participate in an event this big. He fought to keep the way Carlos’s request made him feel from showing on his face, but was sure that some of his gratitude shone through because his partner stepped forward and clasped him in a quick hug, patting him on the back roughly a couple times.

  “I would be honored. Again, I don’t see what this has to do with the bet, though. Besides, don’t you normally start to plan the wedding after you’ve proposed and she’s said yes?”

  Carlos waved a hand. “Semantics. We all know she will say yes, and I don’t want to wait a year to marry her. I’m gonna push for a wedding in six months. Planning started the minute I bought the ring. The favor has to do with the reception.”

  Rafe groaned—he clearly already knew what was happening at the reception, and if he didn’t want to be a part of it, it was safe to assume Reese wouldn’t want to participate either.

  “I’m going to do one of those groom dance things for Kelsey at the reception.”

  “No. Nope. Niet. Nein. Not happening. I don’t dance.”

  Carlos waggled his finger. “Nah-uh-uh, you don’t get to back out. You owe me one favor and I’m calling it in. We start rehearsals next week.”

  Reese looked to Rafe. “How the hell did he already get you to agree to this?”

  “He said that if I didn’t participate, he would show the guys at work pictures of me in a leopard print singlet.”

  “Why the fuck did you ever put one of those things on? With Carlos present?”

  “I didn’t. He’s just really good with Photoshop.”

  Reese couldn’t hold back his laugh. He could already imagine the compromising positions Carlos would Photoshop Rafe into if given the proper motivation.

  “Laugh it up, but you’re stuck doing this stupid dance, too. Wait until you hear the song he’s picked out.”

  He looked to Carlos who was now smiling like a kid who’d managed to break into a cookie jar. “What song did you pick?” Reese practically growled.

  “‘Sucker’ by the Jonas Brothers. Naturally.”

  Reese sank back down onto the weight bench and rolled his eyes skyward. There would be cameras at the wedding reception. Videos would be taken. Those videos were sure to circulate. And because of a stupid bet that Carlos had fucking set him up to lose, he would never live his friend’s wedding night down.

  When Reese pulled into his apartment complex after his workout, he sat in his car, dreading the thought of going into his apartment alone. After spending the last couple nights at Becky’s, his own home felt so lonely. Going upstairs meant sleeping in his cold, empty bed alone. It meant thinking about all of the things he was too weak to consider. Alone with nothing to distract him, he knew that he would berate himself for avoiding his mother over the last few days. He was doing his best to put on a brave face, but he couldn’t stand the thought that over the next few months he would watch such a strong, vivacious woman fade away to nothing. He was a fucking coward.

  If he spent the night here, he was sure to get no sleep, and tomorrow morning he would wake up and have breakfast alone instead of with his son. Ryker still wasn’t completely comfortable around him, but he talked more every time he saw Reese. The way his son had started to study his face, taking in Reese’s features and expressions, warmed his heart. He’d read a study that said kids on the spectrum could read their loved ones’ facial expressions and emotions just as well as children who weren’t autistic. It gave him hope that Ryker seemed to be making an effort to learn how to read him. It was a small thing, but relationships were built one piece at a time.

  Last night when he’d packed a
change of clothes and headed to Becky’s, he’d thrown in an extra pair of jeans, underwear, and a Henley, just in case. He stared down at the screen of his phone and the text message he’d already written and deleted a hundred times. Before he could hit send, a message from Becky popped up.

  Becky: You’ve been typing and deleting a message for ten minutes now. Just send it.

  Reese: How could you possibly know that? Fucking stalker.

  Becky: You’re using an iPhone, jackass. The little typing bubbles keep appearing and disappearing as you delete and retype your message.

  Reese: Shit.

  Becky: So? Just send the damn message.

  Reese: I’m sitting in my car outside of my apartment thinking about how much I don’t want to go inside.

  Becky: Where would you rather be?

  Reese: In your bed. Holding you.

  Becky: Then why aren’t you here?

  Without bothering to reply, Reese threw his phone onto the passenger seat of his car and backed out of his parking space. As he drove to Becky’s house, he couldn’t help but think about the effect all of this time spent with her would have on him in the long run. They’d agreed to be co-parents, but spending the night with her every night was blurring lines that he probably needed to keep firmly in place.

  They still hadn’t really worked through any of the emotions he knew that they both felt under the surface. He was still mad at her for hiding Ryker’s existence from him for so long. She still felt as though he’d abandoned her. Could a relationship even be salvaged with so many negative emotions involved? He couldn’t deny the pull he still felt toward her or the way that he felt at home when she was in his arms, but there was so much fucked-up shit between them.

  With everything else going on in his life right now, he knew that it wasn’t smart to start anything with her. He needed to focus on his son, his brother, and his mom. Knowing this, he still didn’t turn back around and go home. Instead, he found himself pulling into the driveway of Becky’s house twenty minutes later. Shoving his phone and keys into his pocket, he grabbed his small duffel bag from the back seat of his car and met Becky at her open front door.

  In shorts and a thin tank top, her face clear of makeup and her hair in a wild bun, she looked like she was greeting him at the door of their home after a long day of work. She looked like he’d always imagined she would when he was younger and picturing their future together. The seventeen-year-old boy who’d been filled with dreams of their future together rejoiced at the sight, even as the man he was now worried about what he was starting by continuing to spend the night here.

  When he got to the door and she wrapped her arms around his waist, however, the boy and the man both cheered. Nothing had ever felt as good as Becky’s arms wrapped around him. No woman would ever fit him this well. He was made to hold and be held by her. It both terrified and exhilarated him to be here with her again. With everything else going on in his fucked-up life, she felt like a safe haven, and he fucking needed that right now.

  He dropped his duffel at his feet and returned the hug, wrapping one arm around her deliciously curvy waist, and sliding the other hand into her hair, loosening her bun. He ducked his head and planted a soft kiss on the crown of her head. He’d always loved how short she was, how delicate she felt in his arms when he knew that she was one of the strongest people in his life.

  When she looked up at him, her eyes full of concern, he couldn’t stop himself from claiming her lips with his own. Her hands fisted the material of his shirt at his back, and the gentle kiss suddenly burned hot.

  Removing his hands from her waist and hair and breaking their kiss, he grabbed his bag from the ground. Becky grabbed his free hand and led him through the house to the only room he had yet to see—her bedroom.

  He had a feeling they both knew that they shouldn’t do this, that they should talk before getting physical again. He also had a feeling that in this moment neither of them cared. He put his bag down just inside her bedroom door and closed it with a soft click. Instead of spending time taking in the room and its furnishings, he crossed it in a few quick strides and took Becky back into his arms.

  Without a single word between them, they picked right back up where they’d left off at the door. Reese teased her lips open with his tongue and swept into her mouth, claiming it the only way he knew how. Over the years, he’d thought he must’ve been imagining how good it had been with Becky. Being here with her now though cleared him of that disillusionment. Nothing, nobody, would ever feel this right.

  Her hands worked to pull his shirt over his head, and he broke the kiss to help her before turning his focus to her clothing. He pulled off Becky’s tank top while she shimmied out of her shorts. The two of them reached for his pants together, removing both them and his underwear quickly so that when they met in another passionate kiss, they were both bare.

  Gripping Becky’s thighs, Reese lifted her and wrapped her legs around his waist before falling into bed. They both gasped when the tip of his cock brushed her clit, their bodies fitting together like puzzle pieces. He began to kiss his way down her body, wanting to go down on her again, needing to taste her, but she shoved her fingers into his hair to hold him in place.

  “No foreplay. I want to feel you now.”

  Reese groaned and felt his dick twitch. He fucking loved going down on Becky, and always had. In this moment though, he wanted nothing more than to be inside her. He wanted to lose himself in this connection between them—a connection that hadn’t dissipated at all in their time apart.

  He studied her face as he entered her slowly, her tight heat making him groan. When he was fully seated inside her, he stopped. Their first time together in ten years had been full of anger and hurt, but all he felt for Becky right now was tenderness. It both terrified and warmed him.

  “What’s wrong?” she asked softly.

  “Nothing. Everything is fucking perfect. You are fucking perfect.”

  “Reese,” she moaned softly. Becky lifted her hips, urging him to move. He gripped one of her thighs and lifted her leg angling himself in a way that he knew would make her see stars. They’d spent countless hours when they were younger exploring each other’s bodies, and his own still remembered exactly how to pleasure her.

  He maintained a slow pace, watching her reactions as he moved to make sure that she was enjoying this as much as he was. She met each of his thrusts and reached up to pull his head down to meet her own, their lips joining in a soft but hungry kiss.

  They continued to rock together, and he could feel his orgasm building at the base of his spine. He ground his pelvis every time he pushed into Becky, making sure to hit her clit with every stroke. Their breaths grew more labored as they got closer and closer to their climaxes together, and when she gasped into his mouth, he felt her contract around his dick, her orgasm bringing about his own.

  While he came down from the pure bliss of one of the most intense orgasms he’d had in his life, he released her leg and brought his hands up to cup her face. He planted a firm kiss on her lips and then showered her face in featherlight pecks, giving her all of the affection he’d been unable to show her for ten years. He delicately kissed each of her cheeks, her forehead, and her closed eyelids before resting his forehead against hers, sharing breath with her.

  “What the hell are we doing, Becs?”

  She sighed and ran her hands up and down his bare back. “I have no idea.”

  Chapter Fourteen

  After Becky and Reese had taken their turns using the bathroom to clean up and brush their teeth, they crawled back into bed together. As soon as she was under the covers, Reese pulled Becky’s body over to his. She curled her leg over his hip, her arm resting on his stomach as her head found the comfortable nook where his neck met his shoulder. She breathed him in and felt her body slowly start to unwind as his fingertips drew soothing circles on her bare back.

  This was exactly how they used to lay during the hours they’d spent alone at hi
s mother’s house after school. Curling up with Reese this way felt both foreign and familiar at once. “Are we fooling ourselves? Starting up whatever this is again with so much unspoken between us can’t be healthy.”

  Reese heaved a heavy sigh and was quiet for a few moments, his fingers now trailing up and down her back in broad strokes instead of tracing circles into her skin. “I honestly don’t know.”

  “Well maybe…we can try talking it out now. We’re both calm, and there is no way that we can fight right now with Ryker asleep. We have to keep our voices down, so we need to stay calm.”

  He huffed out a laugh, and she felt it shake his body under her palm. “Well that’s true enough. Okay, you go first.”

  She slapped him teasingly on the stomach. “Jerk.”

  Reese turned his head and kissed her lightly on the cheek. “I can go first if you want me to, but you know that I take longer to gather my thoughts.”

  “Fine,” she sighed. “I’ll go first.”

  She paused for a moment, trying to decide exactly what to say and how to start to describe the conflicting emotions she felt.

  “All these years I’ve just been so fucking mad at you for leaving that I never felt it was wrong to keep Ryker from you. I was so focused on getting him back and being mad at you that I never really stopped to think about how out of character it was for you to just disappear. With everything going on right now though, all of my anger seems kind of silly and pointless, and I haven’t really been able to hold on to it.”