Becoming His Awesome Beauty: Volume 1

by Sheila Holmes

  Mason apologized to the woman.

  Awsty turned in the woman’s direction and simply said, “Sorry.”

  She may have had a good experience in the Singles class, but Awsty was no saint yet. And, before she could think better of it, she spit out at Mason, What’s wrong with you?!”

  Unsure how to even react, he gave way to his feelings of jealousy felt earlier in the classroom.

  “What’s wrong with me? What’s wrong with you?!”

  Awsty could feel her anger and frustration mounting. Rather than yelling angry words at him, she doubled her fists at her sides, growled and walked around him, continuing her now stomping stride toward the worship center.

  Mason stood there, not having taken even one step away from their collision point, and threw his hands into the air. “Unbelievable!” But, even as he turned and watched her stomp away, he couldn’t help himself from thinking how really pretty she looked today.

  Chapter 22

  Pastor Greg was greeting at the front door again before the second service. As Awsty approached the entry, she could see there was no way to avoid him. She was already upset over Mason refusing to sit next to her, then plowing her over into that woman, so she wasn’t in any mood to be in anyway pleasant with anyone.

  When Pastor Greg took her hand to shake and welcome her, she was aggravated that he didn’t know who she was.

  “Hi, I’m Pastor Greg. We’re glad you’re here this morning. Is this your first time…”

  “Thanks. And, no, I’m not a first-timer. We’ve already been through an introduction last week. My Grammy introduced us. I’m Awsty. Awsty Truesdale.”

  She didn’t wait for a response, nor reaction from Pastor Greg. She rather brusquely pulled her hand from his and walked past him into the sanctuary.

  His mouth was open, but he didn’t realize it. He kept watching the pretty young woman with whom he’d just had a not-so-friendly exchange.

  “Awsty… that’s right. Awsty Truesdale. That was Awsty Truesdale?!” He looked around himself to see if anyone had heard him.

  Although he was able to resume his greetings to those who entered, Pastor Greg’s mind kept wandering to a very pretty young woman, so unlike the gothic scarecrow of last Sunday, who had just moments ago looked like she wanted to punch his lights out.

  *****

  All afternoon Mason was distracted from his studies. Actually, his distraction started well before lunch, at which he barely picked. He was spending the day at his parents’ home, so that he could help them with food and set up the dining room buffet in anticipation of that evening. However, the truth was, he was almost no help of any substance in the set up. All he could think about was how badly things had gone with Awsty this morning. He wasn’t used to people not liking him. He just didn’t know how to cope. It had nothing to do with the person, just that she didn’t like him.

  Oh… who was he kidding?! It was all about her. Why didn’t she like him?! He’d bent over backwards trying to befriend her. And, for crying out loud, did she think he ran into her on purpose?! It was an accident! Geez!

  And, to top things off, she was probably going to show up with Ben at the get together that evening!

  Mason stomped around and grumbled most of the afternoon, until his mom finally told him he was welcome to go back in his dad’s study and do some schoolwork for a while. She didn’t say it out loud, but Mason’s behavior reminded her of his sometimes fitful teen years, and she’d be glad to have him out of her hair for a while.

  Why was he so out of sorts? Did he and Geneva have a falling out? She hoped he hadn’t hurt her feelings or something! Not that there was any love lost between she and Geneva.

  Geneva was polite and friendly enough, but she could never be accused of having a personality that was warm and fuzzy. She hardly ever let Mason hold her hand, and when he tried twice in their presence to give her a kiss, she backed off and slightly shook her head no. A kiss on the cheek, for heaven’s sake! And, frankly, after placing her own hand on Geneva’s shoulder two different times to show sympathy once, and affection the other (although she couldn’t remember why), Geneva recoiled like something disgusting had just made contact with her skin, and no further physical contact was ever attempted. Not sure if Geneva was truly God’s Choice for Mason. Although, since it wasn’t her decision who he would eventually marry, she wouldn’t stop trying to engage her. And, pray for her! If they ended up spending their lives together, she needed to pursue a loving relationship with Geneva.

  *****

  As it turned out, Awsty opted out of the singles activity that evening. When she talked to Ben in the afternoon, she came up with some lame excuse about needing to prepare for her job-hunt that coming week. She felt kind of indifferent to the activity itself. But, she felt very strongly that she didn’t want to run the risk of seeing Mason. She’d had enough of him!

  She didn’t want to admit, but couldn’t help thinking to herself, And, after the way I treated him when he bumped into me between services, he probably has no desire to see me again, either!

  She knew she owed him an apology, but she wasn’t ready to humble herself… at least, not yet. Maybe never. She didn’t owe him anything!

  *****

  After praying and turning out the lights that night, Pastor Greg reclined in bed with a mind that wouldn’t shut down. He thought of the church service that very morning, Awsty, the meeting with the elders on Tuesday, Awsty, the report he had to finish before the meeting on Tuesday, Awsty, and even a little bit about… Awsty.

  She looked nice this morning. Radically different than last Sunday. She was scary last Sunday. This morning she looked like just a normal pretty young girl. Twenty-one years old, isn’t that what she’d told him? Not a girl. A woman! She was a pretty young woman. But, not a believer, right?! So much anger! What would make a person so angry?! But, she sure did look pretty this morning. Nine years… he was nine years older than her. His uncle Jeff was eleven years older than his wife. They were really happy! They both loved Jesus, that’s why. Awsty obviously doesn’t have a close relationship with the Lord, judging from her behavior. Wait a minute… I’m being judgmental myself. I don’t know if Awsty knows Jesus or not. I do know she sure looked pretty this morning.

  While his thoughts were in overdrive, mostly about Awsty, he kept playing with his wedding ring. Round and round he circled it with his thumb. After its tenth to fifteenth rotation, it worked its way off his finger and fell to the floor. He’d lost quite a bit of weight during this last couple of years of widowhood and his ring was too big. He knew it had been loose for some time. He needed to take it to a jeweler to be re-sized soon, but in the meantime he’d just leave it off and set it on his nightstand. He leaned over, picked it up, but rather than placing it on the nightstand, he walked over to his top dresser drawer and placed it inside. It would be safer there. That was the last time Pastor Greg ever wore his wedding ring.

  *****

  She didn’t show last night! Why didn’t she come to the get together? Did she hate him so much that she wouldn’t chance running into him… Bad choice of words… ‘running into!’ Did she feel like she couldn’t even stand the possibly of seeing him again?!

  This is ridiculous… Why did he care?! She was free to like anyone she wanted to. She could love anyone she wanted to, for that matter! He did! He had his awesome beauty, Geneva! Yeah, he had Geneva!

  He needed to call Geneva more often. Just because their schedules didn’t allow them to spend that much time together, he shouldn’t think that meant he should neglect their relationship! He should make an effort to give her more attention. Maybe he’d go out sometime in the morning between classes and purchase her a little gift. Something that said how much he loved her. He wasn’t sure what that’d be, but maybe he’d do that. Yeah, that’s what he’d do tomorrow! Or, as soon as he had just a little bit of free time.

  Actually, he had an exam on Friday. He should probably give all his attention to that this week. Aft
er all, this was his and Geneva’s future he was talking about!

  With those thoughts fading into the background, Mason shifted his thoughts to his studies, which he pursued a couple more hours, then collapsed into bed, to fall almost immediately asleep.

  *****

  It wasn’ the falling asleep. It was the staying asleep that was the problem.

  Mason got up from his bed four times during the night and went to the kitchen for a drink of water, or juice, or anything else he could think to drink that would take his mind off Awsty for a few minutes.

  The entire night it seemed like he’d had nightmares. And, every single one of them starred Awsty. In one, the entire Sunday school class of young men stretched down the hallway of the building in a single file line. She would walk down the line, pointing at each person, and say, “I like you,” but when she got to Mason she would vehemently stress her words through clinched teeth, “I definitely do not like you!” He even tried to move and squeeze in the line at a different location, thinking maybe she’d change her mind the next time, but her distaste for him never varied. She didn’t like him and that’s all there was to it!

  Although there had been four different nightmares during that endless night, the worst, and the one that stayed at the forefront of his waking moments the next morning was the one in which Awsty stood in a livingroom. Whose livingroom, he had no idea. In front of her on the floor was an unusual tufted footstool. The cushion itself was made from long, silky auburn hair. The legs were constructed from four lace-up platform boots.

  As she stood stationary, men he could identify from church in real life, single and married, would walk up to her, kneel on the footstool and ask, “Awsty, will you marry me?” Every time without exception, she would smile, shed a sweet tear, and respond, “Yes, of course I’ll marry you!” But, when Mason’s turn came, her response changed to, “Not if you were the last man on earth!” Slump-shouldered he walked away, looking back to see Awsty accepting the marriage proposal from Gerard Trenton, an eighty-three year old widower from Open Door of Faith.

  He knew they were dreams, but they felt very real at the time, and when he woke up, there were actually tears in his eyes. After swiping them away, he got up, yet again, traipsing to the kitchen for… what? He didn’t know. He looked at the timer clock on the oven. It said five-twenty-seven a.m. He decided he might as well get up.

  So, with the most fitful and distressing night he’d had in years barely behind him, Mason turned on the coffeemaker, then lumbered to the bathroom to turn on the shower.

  What in the world is wrong with me? Why doesn’t she like me?

  Usually, Mason woke up thinking about Geneva, his ‘awesome beauty.’ From this day on, however, she was never his first thought again in the morning.

  In his heart, Mason stepped into the Throne Room. Jesus, I’m just a mess! I can’t sleep, and I’m afraid my studies are going to slide. I keep thinking about Awsty and I don’t know why. She’s unfriendly, has no warmth at all, and she seems to just hate me! I need Your Help and I need it now. Please, Jesus… Please give me wisdom and grant me Your Peace.

  Chapter 23

  Awsty had been looking forward to today from the moment Grammy gave her the little handmade card on Saturday that revealed the gift of a new work wardrobe.

  Like a little child excited to find the presents under the tree Christmas morning, jumping up to run in the direction of the pine scent it exuded, then squealing with delight at each gift that revealed itself under the tree boughs, Awsty jumped out of bed and headed for the kitchen. She expected to see Grammy drinking a cup of coffee and waiting expectantly for her granddaughter to join her.

  She wasn’t disappointed. There sat Grammy drinking the cup of hot delight, watching for Awsty’s appearance. The moment their eyes met, Awsty put her hands together in balled up fists and squealed. She didn’t have to say a word. Grammy knew Awsty couldn’t wait for today and the shopping spree. Although Grammy had never given Awsty a budget amount for clothes, Awsty knew she would be beyond generous to her. She always had been. From giving Awsty the biggest homemade cookies from the canister to snack on when she visited as a child, to giving her multiple wrapped gifts at Christmas in comparison to her mother’s one bagged and sorry-looking gift, she had always made events so exciting.

  “Grammy, I could hardly sleep last night, waiting for today.” Spoken with a clean un-made up face, slightly matted hair, and a grin that stretched across her face, she looked like she had when she was just small. Just a little girl. A little girl with so many hopes.

  “Me too!” was all Grammy could say. She had a lump in her throat that didn’t permit any more words than two. She ached for this young woman who had been nothing more to her own mother than an inconvenience, and a burden. She would make this a magical day for Awsty if it killed her!

  “I’ve been up quite a while, but I didn’t want ya ta wake up until ya was ready, so I worked real quiet. I’ve already got our lunch packed. It’s right there next ta the front door.

  “I’ve got the money for our ice cream cones in my purse on the floor next to the picnic bag.

  “I don’t know what ta tell ya ta wear. Just whatever’s comfterble. Ya should prob’ly wear the flat shoes from yesterday. We’ve got a lot ‘o walkin’ ta do.

  “I thought, though, we’d better drive today. I don’t know if ya saw the strip mall we’re goin’ to while ya was on yer job-search day. It’s two blocks even farther down from the church, on the other side ‘o the street. The weather’s s’pose ta be nice t’day, but I’m hopin’ we’ll have so many bags that it’ll be hard to carry ‘em home if we’re walkin’. I’m hopin’ the car won’t do somethin’ stupid like breakdown. That car’s about a hundred years old.”

  “I haven’t seen the strip mall up close, but you can see part of it from the church,” replied Awsty, then added, “I’m glad we’re taking the car, even if it is old and pitiful.” She had the utmost enthusiasm for the day written all over her face.

  A minute or two of silence, then Awsty spoke again. “Grammy?”

  “Yes, child?”

  “I’ve never been shopping in stores before, and I’m not sure about finding clothes for work, or whatever. I might need some help today trying to match things up and stuff.”

  ‘Sweetheart, ‘tween the two of us, there’s no stoppin’ us. And, if it takes us all day ta get it done, so be it. We’ll take a break about noon, go ‘cross the street from the mall ta the park, and we’ll eat our picnic lunch while we decide how ta handle the rest ‘o the day. Hey, if it takes us until dinnertime, we’ll just stop then and come straight home fer dinner. Ya know, if we can’t find ever’thing ya need t’day, we’ll just take a second day ta finish up. Deal?”

  “Deal!”

  *****

  “Grammy, that lunch just hit the spot,” said Awsty, looking down at the grass braid she was making, but looked up at Grammy with a sudden grin. Then, a snicker.

  “Grammy,” she laughed, “you’ve got a great big chunk of chocolate chip on your chin, and the rest of that bite is on your shirt, left side, in a pretty interesting place.”

  Grammy reached up, and grabbing the chocolate chip from her chin, she poked it in her mouth and chomped away on it. When she then looked down, she spotted the rest of the ice cream in a gooey mess on the left side of her slightly protruding bosom. She first looked up at Awsty and began giggling, then took her left index finger and scooped the glob up. After poking it in her mouth, she tried to clean up the stain it left, but only managed to smear it more.

  “Well, I’m just makin’ a mess here!” But, when she looked back up to see Awsty quietly laughing, she just joined in. Within minutes, they were both laughing so hard that Awsty fell back on the park grass and lay there shaking. Grammy wasn’t far behind her in laughing intensity, but she managed to stay in an upright position.

  When the laughter subsided, Grammy asked Awsty about some of her clothing selections earlier.

  �
�I saw in the beginnin’ ya were choosin’ mostly black, dark brown and navy clothes. But, then, all of a sudden ya put most ‘o them back on the racks and started pickin’ lighter colors. What happened to make ya change yer mind on colors?”

  “Well, I did choose mostly black. I like black, and it’s what I’ve worn for a long time. Grammy, nobody on the streets wears colors. Everything they wear is mostly from dumpsters or from the closets at the community centers. I just wore what I had or could get free. Usually the clothes were dark in color. And, then I got used to it.

  “But, I tried on that one outfit you picked out. The rose-colored shirt with the gray pants. And, even though I didn’t want to, I put the scarf you pulled for me on with it. I knew when I came out you’d be checking to see if I had tried it on. I felt really uncomfortable in the whole outfit. But, two girls that were both trying on clothes came out of their dressing rooms to show each other what they had tried on. They didn’t know it, but I could hear them whispering as I looked at myself in the mirror at the end of the hall. One of the girls said that she wanted to find clothes like I was trying on. That I looked really cute in them. And, the other one whispered back that she never would have thought about wearing a scarf like that with the outfit, but she loved it. Next thing I knew one of them called out to me, ‘Where’d you get the scarf? In fact, where’d you get all the pieces you’re wearing?’

  “Funny thing, when I looked back in the mirror, I thought, You know what? I really do look nice in these!

  “Remember when I came out, grabbed a couple more shirts and pants and took three more scarves into the dressing room?”

  Grammy nodded.

  “It was right after they talked to me. I thought maybe I should re-think the things I had been choosing at first.”