by Nicole Thorn
“Don’t let that ass keep you from fun things,” he told me as we walked down the hall. Poe had my hand, and swung it as we went on our way. I didn’t mind the stares we got. “So what if he sees you there?”
“Well, he thinks I wrote him a love letter, pleading for him to feel charitable and take him back.”
Poe smiled as we got to the doors leading outside. He held the door open for me. “I told you before, I’m willing to violate you in front of him. You may use me as you please.”
“Funny.”
“Not kidding.”
Of course he was, but I wouldn’t have taken him up on the offer. My new rule was not to ogle one of the only two friends I had. It would not have ended well, as much as I enjoyed looking.
“He’ll be right there,” I said, walking through the door with Poe. He took my hand again when he could. “It makes me sick when I see him. The wind rushes out of me all over again, and I can’t breathe.”
Poe stopped again, and put his hands on my shoulders. “You’re stronger than you think you are, Clover. I think this would be good for you. Peter kept you inside all the time, and you’re missing out on what you could have.”
“Meaning?”
He quirked an eyebrow. “You’re a very charming girl, and you would have a lot of friends, if only a giant douche didn’t keep you away from people.”
“I don’t like people.”
“You and me made friends pretty quick, and so did you and Cathy. Did you not like people, or did he not like people, and convince you of the same?”
I…didn’t have an answer for that one, so I stood there silently. I liked spending time with him and Cathy, but that didn’t mean I would have liked it with anyone else.
“Will you take me home if I hate it?” I asked.
“Sure. We can go back to my place and have more friend cuddles.”
When I rolled my eyes, he took offense. I threatened to leave right then, and Poe laughed at me. When I started walking backwards, pretending like I planned to flee, he took a step to me.
“I’ll chase you,” he warned.
“I don’t fear you,” I said, taking another stride backward.
“You should.”
I turned, and ran through the parking lot as fast as I could, not daring to look over my shoulder. I already knew Poe would have been on my tail, ready to catch me. Maybe I should have taken the threat more seriously, because all those Big Macs really slowed me down.
I screamed when Poe caught me, and I went into the air before he had me over his shoulder. Kicking and thrashing, I got him to carry me in a less caveman like way. He cradled me, and looked smug about it.
“Monster,” I accused.
“Don’t be so hard on yourself. I like hard to get.”
Poe escorted me, mostly against my will, across the parking lot. In the distance, I could already hear Cathy’s band playing something that sounded familiar. If I had to place it, I would have guessed something Disney.
When we reached the top of the hill in the parking lot, I saw the awkward set up of the band and the lacrosse players. They got to be in their normal spot, while the band played off to the side of the bleachers. Cathy stood with her bass in her hands, playing along to a metal version of Something There from Beauty and the Beast. Her friend Graham sang the lead. It wasn’t until we walked a little closer that I noticed he had his girlfriend attached to his back. I didn’t see at first, mostly because Graham was massive, and Allison clocked in at an inch shorter than me, and petite as hell. I only knew she was there, because her little hands held his shoulders. Then she poked her head up to sing the parts Graham held the mic out to her for.
“Looks fun,” Poe said to me. “You ready?”
I wasn’t. “Sure.”
We hurried down the hill, and arrived at the band set up as the song ended. Cathy set her bass on the bleachers to come greet us. Poe didn’t put me down.
“Adorable,” she said, cracking open a water bottle. “You’re like a ‘lil baby.”
“Shut up,” I sighed.
Poe set me on my feet, and laced our fingers together. “How goes practice? I like the sound of it so far.”
“Thanks. We’re just fucking around right now. We have to wait for our set to get approved, so we’re playing around. They wanna do some stuff from Rent next. Should be fun.”
Graham and Allison walked up to us, hand in hand. The little blonde skipped along, while her huge boyfriend watched every step she took, grinning like crazy.
The girl stuck her hand out at me first. “Allison. Nice to meet you, Clover.”
Ah, so someone told them we were coming.
I shook her hand, and then we all got officially acquainted. Graham’s deep and rumbly voice matched his terrifying looks, but his tone turned almost soft when he talked to his girlfriend. I couldn’t help but smile.
“You wanna do I Should Tell You, baby?” he asked Allison.
She snorted. “Another Day all the way, honey. Duh.”
He smirked. “Of course. What’s wrong with me?”
“You grew up pretty. You ain’t got that fancy book learnin’.”
Graham rolled his eyes sarcastically. “Curses. Hop upon my back, little monkey. We have work to do.”
She skipped closer to him, and waited for a boost to get onto his back. Her arms locked around his neck, and the boy looked so pleased to have her there. “Come along, Catherine. We have an audience to please.” Allison nodded to the team.
It made me look over, and I saw them running around with those death sticks, chasing the little ball. All but one, who stood frozen in the middle of the field. Peter watched me, and his eyes went right to my and Poe’s linked hands.
“Someone is jealous,” Poe said to me, looking pleased. “I say we make it worse. You in the mood for petty?”
“Depends.”
He nodded to the people in front of us. I saw them dancing, those who were friends with the band, wanting to watch them play. They got into it, singing along, and looking…happy. I wanted to be happy.
“Let’s do it,” I said.
Poe bowed to me, and held his other hand out. “May I have this dance, darling?”
I grinned like an idiot. “Please.”
He took me out a little further, and started slow dancing with me in the middle of the grass. I didn’t even bother to look to see if Peter noticed. It took me all of two seconds not to care anymore. Because Poe had my hand in his, and his other on my waist. We slow danced to a rock song, while everyone else danced the right way. This felt better for us.
The songs changed, and people took turns singing. A couple of the friends of band members went, and chose another Disney song. They all ended up sounding like metal covers, but that somehow made it so much better. Everyone got so into it, and I couldn’t remember why I hadn’t wanted to come.
“I’m gonna dip you,” Poe warned, pulling me against his chest.
“Oh, you better not, mister.”
He gave me a look, holding me tighter against him. My brain went right to a bad place, but it felt damn good. “Or what?”
“I wouldn’t know what to threaten you with.”
Poe leaned to me, putting his lips to my ear. “I think you have more power over me than you believe.”
Before I could make up a snappy response, he dipped me backward. I nearly screamed, but ended up laughing as I decided to never let him do that again. I didn’t like the head rush. Poe got a kick out of it.
I basked in the utter ridiculousness that was slow dancing to metal versions of Disney songs, sung by a giant and a Hobbit. The best part was that I didn’t feel stupid, or weird for doing it. I could play with Poe, and not be self-conscious about my choices. I had always been so aware of people around me, but I couldn’t care less now.
Since it had happened, I felt guilty about not telling Poe about the boy that had talked to me the day before. He’d looked so twitchy, and so worried to talk to him. If he needed a little help,
I didn’t want to leave him out to dry. I could have related to the anxiety thing, and it wasn’t fair that he had to miss out because he couldn’t talk to Poe.
“I should tell you something,” I said nervously. “But I don’t want you to get mad at me.”
“Great start, and you shouldn’t worry about me getting mad at you. Unless you, I don’t know, trashed my car or something.”
My gaze sharpened. “Ha, ha, ha.”
He kissed my forehead, smiling. “Tell me, missus.”
“When you had to run and grab your backpack, this guy came up to me in the parking lot. His name was Brent, and he said that he knew you. He asked me not to mention it, but it felt a little weird.”
I watched Poe become someone else while holding me, and it made my blood feel cold as it slowed inside of me. I wanted to push myself away from the obvious anger I saw in Poe, though I knew it wasn’t for me. It couldn’t have been for me… It still made me afraid, because I didn’t want him to take it out on me. Peter always took it out on me.
“Poe,” I said carefully. “Who’s Brent.”
Poe’s hand tightened on mine, almost painfully. “No one,” he growled. “Don’t worry about it.”
“But—”
“No. Let this go, Clover. Please.”
What was I supposed to do with that hard of a rejection? It only gave me another hundred questions that I didn’t have before, and way more reasons to worry about him. That pensive look, and the tension in his body had me thinking about dragging him off to the car for a talk. I would have, if I believed it’d gotten him to tell me a thing.
I’d learned since meeting him, that the boy had two different sides of him. It wasn’t the worst thing, but it proved to be something that frightened me. It only made me think that his views on me would change as suddenly as his personality did. What would it have taken to get him to decide he didn’t want me around anymore? What would it have taken for him to have been happier without me?
Not a lot, I imagined.
Poe stayed quiet for a while, and I waited for him to tell me I did something wrong. My behavior always had someone to correct it, and since the other boy who did it currently played a game a hundred feet away, I waited for this one to do it. I’d opened my big mouth, and made things worse. I kept looking up at Poe, expecting him to say it at any time. I had it coming, after all.
It changed again, that look on his face. He still didn’t say anything, but the tension started to ease away, and his grip on me loosened up as we danced together. He held me closer, and put his chin on the top of my head. We stayed like that, silent, for longer than I could have measured.
“His stares of hate are delicious,” Poe sighed happily. “I can literally feel them, and it delights me that it bothers him so much to think you and I might be a thing.”
I snapped out of my worry, looking to see what Poe meant by that. When I saw, I scoffed. “He’s stupid.”
“He’s possessive.” Poe shot a look over to Peter, who stood still again on the field. Poe waved, and Peter glared before he went back his game.
“I don’t want you feeling like I’m using you,” I said. “That’s not why I’m doing this.”
“I didn’t think it was. Don’t stress.” Poe kissed my cheek, and my knees got a little wobbly.
We went back to dancing, while the others switched partners. Another singer took over from the crowd of dancers, and the music changed to something a little poppier. Poe and I altered our dance accordingly, but I saw his expression beginning to droop. That melancholy leaked back into his eyes, and I knew it all too well. I probably couldn’t have said anything to make it better, but I wanted to try anyway.
“Are you feeling okay?” I asked, slowing us down to a sway.
Poe blinked. “Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?”
“You look…sad.”
He smiled, but I didn’t buy it. “I’m not sad, Clover. Don’t worry about me.”
It didn’t work like that, so I would keep on worrying until the day I died. When Poe went quiet again, I poked him in the shoulder. He looked up, but I didn’t say anything. Instead, I rested my head against him, and we swayed out of time with the music.
Poe started humming, and I believed completely that he did it to trick me. I could appreciate the effort, and I knew a thing or two about pretending to be okay so that it didn’t hurt the person I was with. I’d done that for Peter and my parents a million times. I let it go for now.
I liked how it felt, dancing like this. Surrounded by people, but all alone with Poe. It was weird how comfortable I could have been like that, and it made me wonder when the other shoe would drop.
“We should get dinner,” Poe said out of nowhere, making me lift my head up. “Friday night would be good. We can get dinner, see a movie. Whatever you want.”
“Sure. You want me to tell Cathy?”
He laughed, but I didn’t understand why. “Um, I was thinking you and me. Alone.”
Why would he want to go out with me alone? “Are you sure?”
Poe smiled, looking off in another direction. “Positive. Why? Do you not like it when we’re alone together?”
I gave him a funny look. “Of course I do. I liked our friend nap yesterday, and the ice cream date was lovely.”
Poe’s shoulders relaxed a bit. “I’m down for a nap any time you want. Like right now. We can totally head off to my place if you’re sleepy.”
I didn’t mind the idea of getting all warm and cuddly again, so I went to say yes to his offer. Cathy decided to run up to us then, so I never got the chance.
She pulled on my hand, ripping me away from Poe with ease. “Your moronic ex keeps stopping his game to stare at you,” she said, thrashing me around in her own version of a dance. “Isn’t it great!”
Peter moved slowly when I looked over at him on the field, and I didn’t understand why he bothered glancing at me. He didn’t give a shit what I did, until I started making friends. Now, he marched over to where the cheerleaders were. Kelly grinned as he went her way, and he looked over at me for half a second before he reached her.
“What an asshole,” Cathy said, staring at Peter as he stuck his tongue down Kelly’s throat. The girl didn’t seem to have noticed his little issue with staring at me, and I wondered what she would have done if she had.
“Gross,” Poe commented, appearing at our side. “I can’t believe he actually kisses like that.”
The two broke apart, and I groaned while staring at the ground. Cathy bumped me in the shoulder. “Hey, I have an idea. Don’t freak out.”
“Huh?”
Cathy had her eyes on Peter, and she waited until the moment he looked over. When he did, Cathy grabbed me, and crushed her lips against mine. I made a sound of shock, needing a second to know what the hell she was doing. She parted my lips, and then her tongue went into my mouth, and I kind of…let it happen.
I’d never been kissed against my will before, so this felt interesting. I closed my eyes, not wanting to ruin the point of it. Cathy wanted Peter to suffer, and I didn’t mind that so much. He deserved to be a little bothered after what he did to me.
Cathy pulled away, grinning madly. “That was pretty good. You taste like chocolate.”
I blinked, and then looked at Poe, unsure of what to say. I just felt like I needed to look at him, as if I needed him to respond well. I didn’t know why.
He cleared his throat, and put his hands in his pockets. “Well then… You did a number on the boy.”
We all saw Peter, his hands tight on his lacrosse stick as he watched us. I smiled, and waved at him until he took off to play his game. Was that winning?
“Good,” I said, and I took Poe’s hand. “Let’s enjoy it.”
Chapter Seventeen: It Can Always Get Worse
“It’s going to be magic,” Cathy promised as the three of us stood in the hall. “Watch and see. I promise you that you’ll wanna marry me after this is over.”
I eyed Poe doubtfully. “
How much you want to bet that this is something insane?”
“I wouldn’t take a losing bet,” Poe said to me, standing right at my side while I closed my locker.
We all faced one way, and it had to have made us look like a bunch of crazies, about to cast a spell or something. But we watched Peter getting things out of his locker, and he liked to take glimpses at us too. He hadn’t come over to talk to me, like I’d thought he might have. In his head, he must have thought I was trying to prove a point to him with that kiss. Like I had been trying too hard to convince him that I didn’t write that letter. I would have thought that if it were me.
Peter closed his locker, and put his backpack on. As he turned and walked away, I watched the bottom of it split open, and a cascade of books and papers fall out onto the floor. Cathy turned sharply to us, laughing to herself with the most pleased look on her face.
“Finally!” she declared. “My cloth magic isn’t a waste.”
Peter dipped down to pick up his things, checking the bag too. When he saw the tear, he looked up at the three of us. Our timing was perfect, and we all played cool when we nearly got caught. I leaned against Poe, hiding my face against him while I laughed to myself. He smiled too, his back facing Peter.
“Shh,” he said. “Mustn’t let the moron know there were hooligans at work.”
“He probably won’t catch on,” I whispered. “He wasn’t ever all that bright.”
Poe patted my hip, and we both looked over to see Peter angrily picking up the last of his books. He shot me a glare, then turned and left the hallway. I should have felt bad, but I didn’t.
“One more day of practice,” Cathy said. “And I get a whole three days off. The guys wanna make sure we don’t suck this time. Something about getting paid makes them wanna work hard.” She rolled her eyes. “Damn goodie two shoes.”
“We can hang out tomorrow,” Poe suggested. “Maybe just sit around eating.”
“My kind of day,” I sighed, closing my eyes.
“You and Cujo have that in common,” Cathy told me. “You both get the same cute dead eyes too.”
At the same time I said a sweet, “Aww, thank you,” I flipped Cathy off.
