Beefcakes

by Katana Collins

  I swallowed… that was better. A little.

  I took a swig of my martini, buying myself a few more seconds to think. “Why would I say yes to this? I have no desire to be on TV. I don’t seek fame. I have a great job that I already love. So, what’s in it for me… the ex?” I asked, throwing my gaze to Elliott. There was a lot in it for the town, of course. Those permits cost a lot of money that would be funneled right into services and parks and hell, maybe even go a long way toward renovating the old mill into my vision for the outreach clinic and event center. But for me? What the hell was my personal incentive to be on this stupid show?

  Ash strummed his fingers against the whiskey tumbler. “The couple that wins the final baking challenge receives one million dollars.”

  I sucked in a sharp breath. One million dollars. Even after taxes, that was a hell of a lot of money.

  Jude leaned in, adding, “We can’t guarantee that money, of course. Although we’re routing for Beefcakes, we can’t promise you guys the win.”

  “But,” Ash added, “the bakers and the exes voted in to compete with them are each guaranteed a fifty-thousand-dollar stipend for their time being part of the show.”

  I nearly spat my martini and had to press my palm against my lips as I coughed. “Fifty thousand is a stipend?”

  I turned to find Neil smirking. Gone was the nervous guy with the bouncing knee and twitchy fingers. Now, he was casually leaning back in his chair, sipping his beer. This. This was why he wanted me here. That little shit wasn’t extending an olive branch… giving Maple Grove priority access to ensure the town’s reputation stays intact. I was here because they wanted the bitch ex-girlfriend from his childhood… the scowling girl from the meme… to be on the damn show with him. So more people could make me the laughing stock.

  I shook my head, glaring at Neil beside me. “You’re such a coward,” I said. “You could have told me the truth about why you wanted me here tonight…”

  “As if you would have come.”

  He was right. I wouldn’t have. But at least he wouldn’t be a liar. A liar and a pussy.

  “This is gold,” Elliott said beneath his breath. “And we’re not even filming yet. Their dynamic is perfect.”

  Well, if that wasn’t just the nail in the coffin.

  I wanted to stand up and walk out. Maybe throw the remainder of my dirty martini in Neil’s face… but that would have been a waste of a good drink. Despite wanting to walk away… one million dollars rang in my head, echoing like I was in a chamber.

  “The winners get one million total? Is it divided evenly?”

  Ash’s smile twitched higher. Did I sound too eager? Yes, I needed money, but could I actually consider doing something as crazy as this? There was so much I could do with that money. With half a million dollars, I could stop the developer from winning the bid on the old Maple Grove Mill and turning it into a strip mall.

  “You each get five hundred thousand if you win,” Jude said.

  Ash grinned. “And if he proposes at the end, the network will pay for your wedding…”

  “As long as we get to film it,” Elliott added.

  Yeah fucking right. I would marry Neil over my dead body… or better yet, over his dead body.

  I gulped, taking down a much larger sip of my martini than I meant to. Next thing I knew, my glass was empty, and Ash was ordering me another.

  “I don’t think I’d be good for reality television,” I said, clearing my throat. It was the truth. If the plan was that America had to vote for someone? Well, I was not that girl. I was not America’s sweetheart. Never have been; never will be. I was the hard-edged business woman who dealt it to people straight. No one liked that girl. “Hell,” I laughed. “Just look at that stupid caption war. The internet hated me.”

  Elliott’s smirk grew wider. “But, when people vote? They want to see conflict. They vote for the girl who will be most opposing. It’s why the final two of any reality show are usually the most hated and the most loved.”

  I narrowed my eyes at the three men across from me. “And you think I’ll be the most hated?”

  “Well…”

  “Don’t answer that,” I cut Elliott off with a wave of my hand.

  Even if Neil and I didn’t win, fifty thousand dollars was a lot of money. Granted, it wasn’t enough to buy the old mill… but it was a start. It was better than nothing.

  “But even if you don’t join as one of the bachelorettes,” Jude continued in Ash’s place, “We’ll still be paying the city for the permits and to rent living spaces for the crew for the four weeks of shooting. And of course, our cast and crew will need to eat. We’ll need to purchase catering for long shooting days. We’ll be going to restaurants and diners and coffee shops. We will give your town more revenue than you’ve seen in years.”

  “Not to mention millions of television viewers will see your charming town as a family-friendly vacation spot,” Ash said.

  “Are you sure they won’t see it as a spring break, woohoo vacation spot?” I pressed, arching my brow.

  “Not if you don’t want them to,” Jude said. “We can highlight your town in whatever way you want us to. We’ll even let you oversee that aspect of filming to ensure that you keep the city branding as you and the city council see fit.”

  Wow. This was tempting. They knew exactly what to say to win me over. I wasn’t quite sure how I was going to make this work. But for the sake of my town… for the sake of my father and every business that was scraping by in Maple Grove… I couldn’t say no.

  “No one is forcing you to do this,” Neil said, leaning into me. “If you say no… we can all say no, Lainey.”

  “Neil,” Liam hissed. “We have to do this.”

  “Shut up, Liam,” Neil growled, glancing up at his friends from across the table. Two splotches of color bloomed on Neil’s cheeks as he dropped his gaze to the tablecloth once more. He sighed and looked at me. “Jude and Ash mentioned that they wanted you specifically, but—”

  Jude nodded across from us. “He’s right. We can pull another one of Neil’s ex-girlfriends instead of you to be the fourth on the show. But we really wanted the first love… the girl next door… to counter the other types of women he dated later in his life.”

  I could feel Neil’s heated gaze searing into me from the right as I stared directly into Jude’s eyes. He was no longer the dashing movie star across from me. He was the TV executive that I was pretty sure was out to ruin my life.

  But if there was one thing I wanted even less than being on the show? It was having four of Neil’s ex-girlfriends here, snuggled up to him. Winning competitions with him. I gulped… maybe even marrying him. On television… in my home town. The thought turned my stomach. Heat flushed my face, and I dipped my gaze to my lap, willing away my blush.

  “I’ll have to think about it,” I said to Ash, Jude, and Elliott. “In the meantime, I’m happy to get you started with the permit application. Neil actually had a great idea earlier… you could use the artists’ residency center for housing… including the uh, ex-girlfriends. Isn’t that pretty typical for dating shows? All the women are in a house together? That’s sort of what our residency center is… but it’s more rustic.”

  Reaching into my purse, I grabbed one of my business cards and slid it across the table to Ash, Jude, and Elliott. “Call or email me in the morning and I’ll get you started on the proper paperwork.”

  The three men stood from the table along with me, and I took each of their extended hands, one by one, in mine.

  “You won’t regret this, Ms. Dyker,” Jude said.

  “I better not,” I said, forcing myself to loosen my grip on the strap of my purse.

  “You won’t,” Ash reiterated. I wasn’t sure I believed him yet, but frankly, I didn’t think we had much of a choice. Our town needed money. I needed money. And judging by the fact that Neil wasn’t running and screaming in the opposite direction and was now standing as well, staring at me with sad eyes… I
was going to guess he needed the money too.

  I moved to walk away from the table as Neil stood up and followed me to the door. Not that I was surprised by that. I could see it in his eyes that he wanted to talk. “You’re not staying for dinner?”

  I glanced back. “I think my job here is done. Since you were using me and clearly didn’t need me here to discuss town business and permits.”

  “Jesus, Lainey, I wasn’t using you. I want you on the show with me. You’re literally the only one of my exes that I think I could stomach being with for over six weeks nonstop.”

  “Aw, how sweet,” I sneered at him sarcastically. “I think I should have that embroidered on a freaking pillow, Neil.”

  He sighed. “I’m sorry… I know how that sounded. But I needed to get you here to this meeting tonight—”

  “Then you should have spoken up and been honest this afternoon when you invited me to dinner. Maybe I wouldn’t have been so blindsided,” I snapped. “You’re a big boy. Use your words and stop letting everyone else fight your battles for you.”

  He stepped back as though my words stung. “I don’t do that.”

  “Don’t you? You let the producers ask me to be on the show when you clearly knew that was the plan. You let Liam jump online to handle the viral meme. You have a pattern of running away from confrontation, Neil. Running away and manipulating others into doing your dirty work for you.” I leaned in closer, narrowing my eyes at him. “Remember the night you left ten years ago? You didn’t even give me the courtesy of a goodbye. You knew Addy was planning to sneak out of the house with me to go to that concert and you asked her to give me a note. She just thought it was another love note… but it was goodbye because you couldn’t handle facing me yourself.”

  Neil swallowed, the line of his thick throat tightening. I hit him in a sore spot. It should have felt more satisfying… finally getting to say all the things I’d wanted to for years. I’d practiced that speech so many times, that I knew it by heart. But it didn’t feel satisfying. It didn’t feel good. I felt… worse.

  He took a slow, deep breath. “I’ve known Ash and Jude since college. They’re two of my closest friends… and I knew that I wouldn’t be able to explain the show like they could. Besides,” he leaned in, whispering. “Couldn’t you use half a million dollars, Lainey? I know I sure as hell could. I need that money. Liam and I need that money for my mom’s chemo treatments. If you’re not going to do the show for yourself… or for me… do it for my mom.”

  It was a low blow using my mom’s situation like that. But it was also the truth.

  I folded my arms, staring at Lainey. I didn’t know if she needed money. I was guessing because, quite frankly, everyone needed money for something. Not everyone needed it as badly as we did, though. “A few weeks ago, at dinner, you talked about buying that old mill and turning it into something for the town. Five hundred thousand dollars is a good start to that.”

  Her face drained of color and she shook her head. “You think I haven’t thought of that already, Neil?” Her lips thinned into a colorless line. “There’s no guarantee we’ll win. There are a bunch of other bakeries… other couples.”

  “We’ll win, Lainey.”

  “How can you be so sure?”

  I held my breath. I wasn’t sure… I was desperate. They were wildly different feelings but also, strangely similar. “Because,” I said, “we have to win.” I hated the way my voice cracked. “Five hundred thousand dollars will not only cover my mother’s medical bills, but also finally get us out of debt and keep our heads above water long enough to take a deep breath of air.” Right now? We were drowning.

  She stared blankly at me, her blush-colored lips parting in the tiniest gasp that had my gut clenching and my dick twitching. It reminded me of the way she used to gasp when I pressed my body to hers. When I took her mouth in a kiss.

  But this wasn’t about that. It wasn’t about passion or our chemistry or even our history. It was about the fact that we needed each other right now. If I was stuck on this stupid reality show, who better to have as my partner in crime than Lainey? Sure, she wasn’t my biggest fan these days, but television loved controversy. And of my exes… God help me, Lainey was the only one I liked, let alone wanted to spend the next few weeks with. I’d had a pretty bad track record of dating bimbos and women who wanted to be actors… who used me to try to get auditions at Silhouette.

  “What if the public doesn’t vote for me?” She sighed. Her hands fell to the outsides of her thighs, and my eyes followed the slender curve of her hip.

  “We have to trust that the network will help us push you through. But also… of all my ex-girlfriends? Trust me when I tell you, you’re the one the American public will be routing for.”

  I smiled down at her because it was true. She was the all-American girl next door. My first love.

  “You’re just saying that because you want me to be on this stupid show.” She crossed her arms, the gesture childish and sweet, and I knew it all too well. It was Lainey’s stance when she was uncomfortable. Closing herself off physically from that which was causing her discomfort.

  I shook my head. “I’m not just saying that,” I said. “I don’t know who of my exes they’re going to bring on, but I can guarantee none of them hold a candle to you.”

  Her eyes slid to mine, the bright blue burning hot like the center of a flame. The unexpected flutter of attraction tugged at my gut. Not that it was a surprise that I was attracted to her… she was gorgeous. But it had felt like a lifetime since she had looked at me with the kind of intensity and, dare I say, chemistry that we had right now. I swallowed, the raw honesty bubbling up inside me. “I need you, Elaina. I don’t deserve your help… I know that. Not after I left like I did all those years ago. But I have no choice but to do this show if Liam and I want to keep Mom’s bakery afloat. And the producers want you on this show with me because of that stupid viral meme. If I could take that back… all of it… I would. I swear I would. But I can’t. Now… maybe we can take lemons and make—”

  “Chocolate cake?” she said, chuckling.

  I nodded, feeling a sad chuckle rumble in my chest as well. It was Lainey’s favorite saying from high school. “That’s right,” I said. “Take lemons, make chocolate cake and leave them all wondering how we did it.” I swallowed, blinking back the moisture brimming my eyes. “Jude and Ash want you on the show, but the truth is? I want you on the show, too. I’m not sure I can do it without you, Lainey…” The words rushed from my mouth. It was the truth. And Lainey deserved the truth… she deserved it from me.

  She reached over, placing her palm against my bare forearm. Energy sparked between us as my gaze jerked to hers. Empathy tightened the corners of her eyes. “I thought the bakery was doing so well,” she said. “Those numbers you showed my dad and me…”

  “The bakery is doing well,” I said. “Better than it has in years. But it’s not enough. Mom was already up to her ears in debt and now with the chemo? It’s almost unmanageable.” I looked up at the ceiling, pausing, and Elaina just stood there, her hand still resting on my arm, waiting. Waiting for me to be ready to talk. Waiting while I composed myself. She was always good at reading me like that. I glanced over at the table where my brother and friends were still sitting. The moment my eyes met theirs, they each averted their gaze, pretending to be deep in conversation about something. I was certain they couldn’t hear us… our table was all the way at the back of the restaurant, and Lainey and I were at the bar close to the entrance, but I lowered my voice anyway, just to be sure. “Liam and I are broke. My mother is broke. I’ve spent nearly all of my savings paying off her treatments. She was a self-employed woman for years… yes, she has health insurance, but her deductible is through the roof. And even when she reaches that, she has to pay fifty percent of treatments out of pocket. We’re going to lose the bakery if we don’t come up with cash and fast.”

  I stared at her soft face. It was the most gentle, concerned expre
ssion I’d seen from her in years. Something tugged at my insides. Elaina was showing concern. For me. It wasn’t much, but considering what a shithead I had been to her ten years ago, it was more than I deserved, and I was going to bask in it.

  “Could you show the bank your new numbers? Maybe with the projected income of this year…”

  I shrugged. “Maybe. It’s worth a try. But even with what the bakery is making now, I still don’t think it’s enough. I haven’t had to dip into my retirement fund yet, but without this show, I might have to.”

  She gasped at that. Elaina was fiscally-minded. She knew how much you lost if you took retirement money out too early. Half of my liquid cash would be gone and it would only keep us afloat for another few months.

  “Well…” her sentence trailed off as her eyes landed back on the table with my friends. They had moved on from staring at us and actually seemed engaged in a real conversation. “Couldn’t Jude or Ash loan you the money? I’m sure they have it—”

  “They can’t lend me this kind of money,” I said. Well, that wasn’t entirely true. I’m sure they could lend me half a million dollars. But, I wouldn’t accept it. Couldn’t accept it. What if I was never able to pay them back?

  Lainey winced. “I hate to say it, but it sounds like your brother is right. You need this show. Even if we lose, we still get fifty thousand dollars each,” she whispered the amount of money as though someone here would be reporting on it, and I couldn’t help but chuckle. “I mean, that’s a really good start. It would at the very least buy you time and get you ahead of any sort of foreclosure.”

  She was right. I groaned and swiped my hand down my face as her words sunk in. “You said we,” I said, glancing up at her from behind my hand. “Does that mean…”

  She sighed. “I’m in.” Despite the weary tone in her voice, she smiled and I grinned so wide, my cheeks actually hurt.

  “You think you can pretend to be in love with me for a few weeks, Lainey? We can even stage a fake proposal at the end to win over audiences…”