They were only inches apart. He could smell her scent, that combination of lavender and baby powder that had permeated his sheets and pillows before he’d stripped the bed and washed them in detergent and bleach in an effort to erase her from his dreams.
He could tell Camel about the threat she’d gotten. They’d go to Viking and Ghost, and they’d start digging. Find out who was harassing her. Find him and make it clear as crystal that if he came near Kayla or Ana, he’d suffer in ways he’d never dreamed.
Yet, what if it wasn’t that easy? The military had no authority when it came to domestic crime. When they’d gone after the Kings of Doom before, they’d been temporarily assigned to Ian Black, who didn’t run a military outfit. The Kings were officially done, so how did Neo and his team go after stragglers in any official capacity?
They didn’t, which meant it would be better for Kayla to be married and safer for Ana to go into daycare on base. He could also apply for base housing, move onto the facility with Kayla and Ana. It would take a couple of months, probably, but once it happened they’d be secure when he deployed. Living on a military installation was like living in the most secure gated community in the world. Everything Kayla would need was there. Hospital, commissary, Exchange. She wouldn’t have to leave the base at all when he was gone.
And if he deployed before they got on base, he could arrange for some of the guys on other teams to watch out for her and Ana. He could keep them safe from afar.
Neo blinked. Was he really considering it?
Yeah, he was. He told himself it was for his teammate, so Camel wouldn’t end up marrying her instead. But that wasn’t the whole truth. He was also thinking of Lesley and how fierce she was when it came to her kids. She’d do anything for them, and he loved her for it. She was nothing like their mother, and she was determined to give her kids the best life she could.
Kayla was cut from the same cloth as Lesley. She’d had a rough time of it, but she loved her child—and her sister—fiercely. She would do whatever it took, including run away again, if that’s what she thought would save them both from harm. It was in his power to prevent that. If Kayla ran, she’d never stop running. She’d never be free.
“If I agree to this, we have to iron out a few things first.”
She nodded. Her hands dropped to her lap. He hated that she wasn’t touching him anymore. Yeah, that was another reason he was thinking about it. Bastard that he was, he liked it when she touched him. He’d like it even better if they were naked when it happened. That wasn’t a reason to marry anyone, but his dick didn’t think too deeply about much of anything that wasn’t physical.
“What kind of things?”
“If we’re married, and I’m responsible for you and Ana, then I’m not living downstairs and dating other women. I want us to have the kind of relationship married people have.”
If he was getting married, it wasn’t going to be a marriage of convenience. He only knew what that meant because Lesley had liked romance novels growing up and told him about them whenever she could make him listen. And he wasn’t doing that shit. If he was giving up the single life to protect Kayla and Ana, then he wanted more from the relationship.
“Sex, you mean.”
Awareness flickered hot. “It’s more than sex, Kayla. We’ve done that once, and we know it’s good. I’m talking about making a real go of it. I don’t want to live separate lives and pretend that’s normal. If we get married, then we get married. If it doesn’t work out for some reason, then we’ll figure that out when we get there. But I don’t want to go into it thinking it’s not going to.”
She nibbled her lip, her cheeks reddening. He wanted to bite that lip. “Honestly, I want Ana to have a dad she can count on. And I want to know before she’s old enough to miss you if it’s going to work out or not. I wouldn’t want to stay married if we’re miserable.”
“Neither would I.”
She frowned. “Zach…. Chloe said something the other day, and I need to know if it’s true. It won’t change my mind about marrying you, but I want to know….”
“Okay.” He couldn’t imagine what Chloe had said, but if he could ease her mind about something, then he would.
“She said you were hung up on someone and it was complicated. Is that true?”
His gut twisted. Chloe said that? He didn’t have to wonder where she’d gotten it. Dirty had told her.
“No, I’m not hung up on anyone,” he said. And he wasn’t. Yeah, he thought about Kayla a lot. Wanted her. Dreamed about fucking her again. It didn’t mean he was hung up on her, no matter what Dirty thought. “There’s no one in my life right now.”
She dropped her lashes. “I’m sorry for asking. I just wondered.”
“What about you?” he asked, and her head snapped up.
She blinked. “Me?”
“Are you hung up on anyone?”
Color flooded her cheeks. “I, um, no. Of course not. You’re the only man I’ve been with since Ana was born, and that was only once. I don’t have time for men.”
“Fair enough.” He hesitated, wondering about the pink in her face. “If we do this—make a real go of it—I’m not saying we have to share a bed right away. I’d understand if you wanted to ease into that part of it.”
Her eyes widened. “You mean we’d date first?”
“If that’s what you want.”
Kayla ran her palms over her shorts. Her hands were small. Her body was small. She was lovely and vulnerable and he found that he desperately wanted to protect her. Like a frigging caveman.
“Okay, that’s fair.”
He sat back and raked a hand through his hair. On the television, they’d moved on to another car. Somebody else paying astronomical amounts of money for a classic automobile. Must be nice.
He’d pretty much made up his mind, but there was a little more to discuss. “If I say yes, you still don’t want to tell your sister the real reason?”
She shook her head. “Not yet. Not until she has her wedding if at all possible. I don’t want to ruin her happiness. I just want her to have a lovely wedding and honeymoon, and I don’t want her worrying about me and Ana.”
“Do you think that’s fair, Kayla?”
She thrust her chin out. He recognized it for the stubborn gesture it was. “Yes, I do. It’s temporary. Only until she and Alexei get married. I’ve caused Bailey enough trouble over the years. For once I want to solve my own problems and take care of her, even if it’s just letting her think everything is great for a while. Her knowing the truth won’t change anything, so keeping quiet for another few weeks won’t hurt.”
He wasn’t so sure, but Bailey wasn’t his sister. And he wasn’t getting between them. “Okay, but if I have to tell Camel so he can protect her, then I will. You need to understand that. I don’t keep secrets from my teammates if they need to know something important.”
“He’ll tell her.”
“He might not. He might agree with your reasons not to. Did you ever think of that?”
She shook her head.
“He loves her and wants her happy. Same as you. You need to trust him.”
“Okay.”
The word came out as a whisper and he knew she didn’t like the idea of Camel knowing. He didn’t think Camel needed to know just yet, but if he did, then Neo wasn’t keeping it from him.
“One more thing. If we do this and you don’t want your sister to know why we’re really getting married, then we’ll have to sell it to her. That means we have to pretend to be in love.”
She reddened again. “Agreed.”
He’d never been in love before, but he’d been around enough of his teammates who were that he was sure he could pull it off. Plus, it wasn’t a stretch to physically want her. He’d told Dirty a couple of months ago that he thought of her like a little sister, but that had been a lie.
A big fucking lie. Dirty saw through it, but Neo hadn’t been about to admit what he’d really wanted to do to Kayla Jo
nes. How badly he’d wanted to taste her pussy again. If he married her though?
Yeah, Dirty would give him hell. So what? He’d still be the one who got to strip her naked and make her come every night. Eventually, when they got that far. He wouldn’t push her on that. He wanted her to need his cock as much as he needed to lose himself inside her.
“So you’ll marry me?” she pressed. “Or do you need to think about it some more?”
Neo thought of his sister and her kids again. How would he feel if some guy married her to help her protect the kids? To provide security—and health insurance—as well as do his best to be a dad they could depend on?
He’d be wary, but he’d be glad too. If the guy really cared about her and meant to do the best job he could.
Yeah, Neo’s teammates had found women they were crazy for. They’d fallen hard and fast, but he didn’t think it had to be that way to work. Marrying Kayla didn’t mean he was somehow going to miss out on finding his soulmate, the one who completed him. He wasn’t sure he believed in that bullshit anyway. His sister hadn’t had any luck in that department, and neither had his parents.
What he had with Kayla stood as much of a chance of working as anything. They had chemistry, and he cared about her and Ana. He wanted to protect them, and he was tired of the single scene. Surely that was good enough?
He held his hand out. She took it. He didn’t squeeze, didn’t shake it up and down. Just held her there, his hand engulfing her much smaller one.
He liked touching her. Liked the zip of attraction that hummed through his veins. The current of possessiveness. He took a deep breath. Studied her hazel gaze.
“Yes,” he said solemnly. “I’ll marry you.”
Chapter Four
Relief flooded her. Kayla closed her eyes and bowed her head as the weight of dread lifted from her shoulders. Zach was going to marry her. It was a huge thing, and she knew she could never thank him enough. With him on her side, whoever’d threatened her wasn’t going to win. He would make sure of it.
“Thank you, Zach. Thank you so much.”
His expression was fierce. “I’ve got your back, Kayla. It’s not what I expected would happen when I opened the door, but you can count on me. I won’t let anyone take Ana away from you, and I won’t let them hurt you either.”
He made her tingle inside, and he hadn’t done a thing but vow to protect her. “I know,” she said, her heart hammering. He was so damned gorgeous. Her body was already starting to melt, to prepare for something more. Her pussy grew hot and achy with anticipation. Remembering his touch. Craving it.
She told herself to slow down before she turned this into something it wasn’t. They were only going to pretend to be in love. That didn’t mean they were. Or ever would be. She’d never been lucky in love. She was good at attracting men, especially the wrong kind of men, but she wasn’t good at being the kind of person they loved.
James hadn’t loved her, though she’d thought he did for a while. He’d been different from the guys who normally hit on her. He hadn’t been filled with himself, talking for the good of his own ego. He’d been interested in her. Who she was, what drove her. She knew now that it had all been an elaborate game that men like him played. His job had been finding vulnerable young women to lure into sex trafficking, and the surest way to do that was make them feel heard and valued.
Zach was still sitting close, still studying her. His scrutiny made her self-conscious.
“I don’t know what’s going on in that pretty mind of yours,” Zach said softly. “I’ve seen six different emotions cross your face in the span of moments. You’re scared. I get that. But is it of the guy who threatened you? Or are you scared of me?”
“I’m not scared of you,” she blurted, embarrassed that he’d seen so much of her chaotic thoughts. “I’m grateful.”
“I would never force you to do anything you don’t want to do, Kayla. I hope you know that. We’ll get married to protect you and Ana, and we’ll take the rest a day at a time.”
“I know you wouldn’t.”
This man had never been anything but wonderful to her. Even on the single night they’d shared, he’d been concerned with her enjoyment, her pleasure. Yes, it had been wild and dirty and fun, but she’d never had a moment of fear or doubt. He’d pushed her to her limits and she’d loved every exciting moment of it. Then she’d run out of his house like there’d been a serial killer with an axe behind her the next morning.
She thought he might ask her about that night, but he didn’t. She was relieved because she didn’t know what to say in response. How did you tell the man who’d had his tongue all over your body and his cock and fingers deep inside you that you’d run away because you were afraid you’d taken things too far? Or, worse, that you suspected he’d fucked you out of pity?
“How soon do you want to get married?” he asked, all business.
Kayla worked to pull her emotions back from the brink. She had to. She’d gotten what she came for and now they had to make a plan. “As soon as we can? I don’t need a ceremony with friends and family. I don’t care about white dresses or any of that. It’d be ridiculous anyway since I have a baby.”
He frowned. “Anybody who thinks you can’t wear white is an asshole. It’s not about purity anymore. It’s tradition. If you want a white dress, I’ll kick anyone’s ass who says you shouldn’t wear one.”
A warm feeling spread through her. “It’s okay. I really don’t. But thank you.”
He picked up his phone and typed something. “Says here you can marry in as quickly as forty-eight hours in Maryland. We have to file for the marriage license first, though. It requires you and me and our identification at the courthouse. We’ll have to wait until Monday. We can marry anytime after Wednesday, but we’ll have to find someone to marry us. If we want to marry at the courthouse, we have to make an appointment after we have the license. That could take another couple of days.”
“I can get the morning off on Monday.”
“Next question. How do you want to do this? Get married at the courthouse or plan something our friends can attend? We only need an ordained minister and a location if we don’t want to marry at the courthouse.”
“I’d rather do the courthouse. I don’t want to take away from Bailey’s wedding by planning my own.”
He studied her. “If you were getting married for the usual reason, what kind of ceremony would you want?”
She didn’t have to think about it. “When I was a little girl, I wanted the white dress with a long train, lots of attendants, and a giant church wedding. Like a princess. But I was a kid with an active imagination back then.” And such a shitty home life that she’d needed things to dream about. She sighed. “Now, quite honestly, I like simplicity. I imagine a garden wedding with a view like Cash and Ella have in the background. A simple ceremony with a friend doing the officiating after they’ve gotten ordained online. I’d wear a flowing cotton dress, maybe white, maybe yellow.”
“No wedding dress?”
She shrugged. “They’re expensive, and you wear them once. Probably not.”
He nodded. “Okay. And what does the groom wear?”
“Easy. If he’s you he wears his Navy dress uniform. If he’s not in the military, he wears a nice suit.” Though now that she was talking about getting married for real, she could only picture Zach in the role of groom.
“Dress uniform, huh? With Navy SEAL trident and everything. Got it.”
“In an ideal world. But Zach, don’t worry about it. All we need to do is get married. It doesn’t matter how.” A thought occurred to her then. “What about your sister? Or your parents? Will they be upset if they aren’t invited?”
She didn’t know anything about Zach’s parents, but she knew he had a younger sister named Lesley who’d had a shitty husband that’d left her and their three kids for another woman. She also knew that Zach adored and admired Lesley very much.
“My sister couldn’t get away eve
n if we did invite her. She works two jobs.” He frowned. “My parents have been divorced for years. My mom’s a classic narcissist who’d make it all about her, and my dad has a new wife who’d also have to be invited. She and my mom hate each other. They used to be best friends.”
“Oh boy.”
“It’s a mess and I don’t like either one of my parents enough to have them here. So no, we’re not inviting them, even if we were planning a wedding for six months from now. They’ll get over it. I’ll call Lesley. She’ll be sorry she missed it, but she’ll understand.”
She hated hearing about his parents, but she understood too. Her parents were both dead now, but even if they’d been alive she wouldn’t want them at her wedding. They’d been two drug-addled disasters who should have never had children. Bailey had been the one to raise Kayla, the one who showed Kayla the meaning of hard work and dedication. Bailey had done everything for Kayla, and Kayla had fucked it all up by getting involved with James Dunn and the Kings of Doom. She was still paying for that mistake, but she was determined that her daughter wasn’t going to.
“I’m sorry, Zach. I know what it’s like to have a messy family. Or did.”
“I know, beautiful. I didn’t forget.”
She’d thought he might’ve since they hadn’t talked about it in a long time. Clearly, she’d been wrong. She dropped her gaze to her lap, uncertain what to say next.
He tipped her chin up with his fingers. “Whether or not we invite anyone to the ceremony, we probably ought to start working on the part where we convince them we’re in love.”
Her belly flipped. “What do you suggest?”
“You go home and I’ll come over. Camel and Bailey will see my car.”
Kayla swallowed. She hadn’t expected to launch into this so soon. No, strike that. She hadn’t known what to expect because deep down she didn’t think he would agree to her proposal. Not really.
But he had. Because he was the kind of man who wasn’t going to let anyone threaten her baby.
“They have Ana, so I’ll leave her with them. I don’t know what they’ll think, but they won’t knock on the door.” She got to her feet. “I’d better head that way then.”
HOT SEAL Devotion Page 4
