by SE Reynolds
Am I awake? I get a tissue and wipe the drool off my desk. Yes, I'm very much awake. Joshua must know by I paid Stacie a visit on Monday. He has no choice but to come clean now. I deserve an explanation or, at the very least, a proper dumping. No, it can't be that. Joshua is a texter, not a phone talker, and certainly not the type to meet me just to dump me. He was doing a good job just fading me out. He must want me back. He finally realized Stacie is nothing, nothing more than a whiny little piece of jealous lint.
I'm surprised to hear from you. Thought you were super busy.
I found some time. I really need to see you. We need to catch up.
Joshua needs to see me. He wants to catch up. He does want me back. After a couple of days with that little pest, I must look like a fucking goddess.
Sure, see you in a bit.
I run to the bathroom and touch up my makeup and hair. I have been a tired mess all day. I'm finally waking up from this bad dream that I thought would never end. I arrive at Ryan's five minutes late. Traffic was bad, but it gave me some extra time to think. If he asks why I went to see Stacie, I will remind him he wanted me to get to know her. I'll tell him I had time to kill in Old Town. I'll tell him I'm looking for new friends to do things with. He will think that it is healthy and stable. I’m going to show Joshua I'm the right choice.
Joshua is standing next to the bar when I walk in. He is facing the door, anxiously waiting for me. He must be as excited as I am. God, I missed this man. I stay calm as I approach him.
"How are you, Joshua?"
I extend my arms out to hug him, but before I reach him, Joshua turns to the bartender.
"She will have a house pinot grigio."
"You remember?"
"It hasn't been that long, Virginia."
"What are you drinking?" I ask.
"Nothing. I won't be staying long."
"Huh? Is JJ okay? Did you get a call?"
He grabs my arm and brings me close to him. His mouth is next to my ear.
"Stay away from me. Stay away from Stacie. Do you understand? Do you understand, Virginia? I want to make sure you understand every word I'm saying to you."
His voice is low and guttural. His breath is hot on my ear.
"I understand you, Joshua," I say, mimicking his guttural tone.
Joshua turns back to the bartender.
"Put her glass of wine on my tab. Enjoy your wine, all alone, Virginia."
He turns and walks towards the door. I can't let it end on this note, not this way.
"Joshua!"
He stops and turns back towards me.
"What's it like to fuck a little fat pig? Do you fantasize about me when you fuck her?"
Joshua stops, turns around, and comes towards me.
"Good, glad you changed your mind and came back. I'm not done with my wine or with you. Are you sure you don't want a drink, Joshua?"
"Shut the fuck up, Virginia. You don't hold a candle to Stacie. She is so much better than you in so many ways."
"You think so? Hmm. But do you really know her? Have you seen the real Stacie?"
"Shut up, Virginia. You’re a mess."
Well, he asked for it. I pull out my phone, open the picture, and hold it up to Joshua's smug face. He squints, trying to make it all out, and then his eyes widen with horror.
"I ran into your new girlfriend at Misty's. She should probably change in one of the bathroom stalls, not out in the open where she can gross people out. Oh wait, is she pregnant, Joshua? That would explain her belly. Congratulations, I guess."
Joshua tries to grab the phone from my hand, but I quickly step away from him and drop the phone in my purse.
"You are beyond sick. You are mental, Virginia. I'd rather be with Stacie and all her curves than a skinny drunken shrew like you."
I gasp so hard I cough, and phlegm forms in my throat. I have no choice but to get rid of it, so I spit it on Joshua's pretty blue tie.
"What the fuck…oh shit. I knew it was you."
"What was?"
"It was you. You destroyed Stacie's sign and spat on it."
I try not to react or flinch or move any facial muscle; instead, I just stare at him and watch the phlegm slide down his tie.
"I don't know what you are talking about. What sign?"
"You're a bad liar. If you don't delete the picture, I will go to my friend, the Sheriff, and tell him what a lunatic you are. He will believe me. We go way back."
"Joshua, it's my turn to make things crystal clear to you. I don't give a shit about you and the town spinster. You deserve each other. You are too stupid to see what you could have had with me. You destroyed it by fucking with that pig. She is destined to just get fatter. And one morning, when you wake up out of your mindless sleep, you will snap back to reality so fast when you see that your little fat pig has turned into a smelly hog, and you are stuck with her. Melissa would turn over in her grave if she saw who you ended up with."
"Be careful, Virginia. You don't know what I'm capable of."
I take a napkin off the bar and hand it to him and then, just as he did to me just minutes earlier, I grab his arm and pull him towards my mouth.
"Ditto."
Chapter 38 – Stacie
Now I know where I stand with Josh, and he wants me, not her. Virginia is a thing of the past, or at least I hope she is. She didn't seem ready to be a thing of the past when she paid me a visit. I don't know why, but I feel sorry for her. If she truly is emotionally unstable, then I hope she gets help. I could talk to Misty about it. Maybe she could intervene, but that could make things worse. I'll leave it alone. Josh says he's going to fix everything. He is my hero, after all. I just want peace for us all. I want Josh and me living happily ever after, and Virginia doing the same but without Josh and me anywhere near her. Josh sent me a sweet text today.
Just checking in, lawyer lady. I will see you soon. Been busy with boring mayoral things, but I haven't forgotten about you. How could I? You are awesome!
I’m wonderfully exhausted this evening. It's been a whirlwind since last Friday. Here I was just going out for a drink with Josh after his speech, and now, not even in a week's time, I'm his girlfriend. I feel like I can sleep easy tonight. I change into my fuzzy yellow daisy pajama pants. They are so soothing against my skin. I top it off with my raggedy George Mason sweatshirt; it's so old but is still one of the most comfortable pieces of clothing I own. I feel very content and very hungry. I open the fridge, trying to find something to make for dinner. Cooking for one is no fun, but I hope one day in my future, which is getting brighter by the minute, I will be cooking for at least two, maybe three, maybe four. There is nothing in the fridge that appeals to me. I could eat the leftover broiled chicken breast and mushy broccoli I made for dinner last night. I really don't want that, but I'm trying to lose weight again now that I have a reason. I take the container of chicken and mushy broccoli out and place it in the microwave. My phone plays Baby Bye Bye Bye from 'N Sync. It's my ring tone for the month. I like to change my ring tones each month with songs from my favorite bands. Last month it was the Back Street Boys, I Want It That Way. I keep my phone on vibrate at the office; nineties boy band ring tones aren't very professional, but they make me happy.
"Good evening Ms. Shewster; it's Sam at the guard's desk. Mister, I mean Mayor Steadman is here. Should I let him in?"
"Really? Yes, yes, of course, thanks, Sam."
I rush to the powder room just off the kitchen and look at myself in the mirror. My makeup is worn off, and my hair is a straggly mess. I grab a hair tie attempting to make a cute ponytail, but it doesn't improve anything. I don't have time to change. I look like a frumpy college kid up late studying for finals, and there is nothing I can do about it now—the doorbell rings. I don't wait to open the door. I fling it open. There Josh, here is the real me, the real frumpy me.
"Are you hungry? I brought Chinese?"
"Hey, this is a surprise; come in, Josh." I guide him to the kitchen.
&nbs
p; "Is everything okay?" I ask.
"Yes, everything is fine. I just wanted to see you."
"Why?" I ask.
"Gosh, what is it with you lawyer types, always questioning a good deed."
"I thought you had all those mayoral things to do."
"I gave them to my assistant instead. I'm a great delegator."
Josh puts the bag on the counter and pulls out white cardboard containers.
"I want to make sure you are okay with the whole Virginia mess that I made."
"It's okay, Josh. It's strange, but I feel if it weren't for Virginia and all her drama, we might not have been, well, you know, like this."
"Hmm, maybe. But we don't need any more drama, Stacie. We have better things to do. But just to be safe, I made sure that Virginia will never bother you or me again. So, enough about her. Let's eat. I'm starved."
"What did you do, Josh?"
"I pushed her off a cliff."
"No, you didn't. Did you?"
My microwave beeps.
"Oh, I was heating up some dinner right before you got here."
I pull my chicken and mushy broccoli from the microwave.
"Yuck! Looks like I got here in the nick of time. No offense Stacie, but that looks…."
"Healthy?"
"Yeah, that too. It's not much of a dinner."
"I know, I'm just trying to get a little healthier," I say as I straighten out my sweatshirt, hoping to smooth out any noticeable bulges.
Josh puts his hands around my waist; it makes me shudder.
"I think you are a beautiful person, and you are perfectly healthy."
He stares into my eyes intently as tears fill them. I blink three times to try and get rid of them before they stream down my face. Josh kisses me above each of my eyes and then moves his mouth to my neck and then to my lips. His kiss is no longer sweet but passionate. I feel warmth between my legs.
"I really care about you, Stacie. You're awesome. Funny, I'm not that hungry anymore. Where is your bedroom?" he whispers.
I point to the ceiling.
"It's a big house, Stacie. Can you be more specific? Better yet, can you show me?"
Josh takes my hand, and I guide him to my room. He walks towards my bed and sits on the edge.
"Come sit with me, Stacie."
I obey.
"I like your ponytail," he says as he puts his hand on the back of my neck, pressing his fingers lightly into its stem. "I didn't push Virginia off a cliff. Although, I wanted to. I talked to her. That's all. She's not going to hurt you or come around you again. And if she does, you have to tell me, okay?"
"Okay, Josh."
Josh kisses me softly. I lie back, pulling him with me as he lands on top of me. His hands travel under my shirt and towards my breasts. No one but my gynecologist and me has touched them in a very long time. His hands are so warm as he gently glides over my nipples. The warmth between my legs grows. He takes my hand and puts it on his pants. I can feel his hardness. I unbuckle his pants and pull it out. It's so hard, but the skin is so soft. It's been so long since I've touched a man. He slides down my pajama bottoms.
"I like daisies," he says as he takes them off.
I remember I'm wearing my control-brief underwear. They are comfortable and help flatten out my stomach. I'm about to apologize for wearing them when I feel him enter me. It doesn't matter now. I'm making love to the man of my dreams, and I'm so happy.
"I love you, Josh."
The words so easily travel from my heart to my lips. He stops for a moment. Oh no, I just freaked him out.
"I didn't mean…."
He whispers in my ear, "I love you."
We continue making love. This isn't a dream. If it were, I would have woken up by now. This is definitely number one in the highlights of my life.
Chapter 39 – Joshua
Ditto? Damn it. If Virginia posts that picture of Stacie, I'm screwed, and if she tags me in the post, then I'm doubly screwed. Stacie's reputation as a lawyer could be damaged. People will always see her as the frumpy town lawyer that was checking herself out in a locker room mirror. She could lose her job, her salary, her big ass house. She could never be my first lady. First ladies aren't seen ogling at themselves in a locker room mirror, especially those that look like–No, I'm not doing that. That's what Virginia wants me to do. There is nothing wrong with Stacie. She is fine just the way she is. I hope Virginia has enough sanity to understand she could get arrested, maybe serve jail time or community service at the very least for fucking with Stacie's sign. She could have a record. I hope she realizes that and is sane enough to stay away. But sane women don't stalk other women; they don't think like that, they don't say things like that. Virginia is bitter to the core. Something dark is festering inside of her. Maybe it started with Harry and his porn, but now it's growing rapidly. She is dangerous, and because of that, I'm fucked.
The ugliness of the afternoon feels like slug slime on my skin that soap and water can't wash away. I need to see Stacie. I order take out from Chang's Red Pepper and pick it up on my way to Stacie's. I don't even think to call her to see if she is free; somehow, I know she is.
Stacie is disheveled when she opens the door. I've never seen her hair up. Her ponytail is messy like a little kid, like Jessie's.
"Are you hungry? I brought Chinese?"
I follow her to the kitchen and hear the microwave beep. She places a container of food on the counter.
"Looks like I got here in the nick of time. No offense Stacie, but that looks…."
"Healthy?"
"If you say so. It's not much of a dinner."
"I know, I'm just trying to eat a little healthier," she says as she looks down towards her stomach.
Stacie is ashamed of her body, it’s obvious. Fucking society, they really do a number on women; don't eat, become anorexic, don't age, get Botox. Just like the wives of the Capitol Hill politicians I've met over the years. They all look like skeletons with frozen clown faces. I want to tell Stacie that looks aren't everything. I want to tell her that her personality, her warmth, her safeness, her potential is what matters to me. I need her to shine for me. I need her to be the confident power woman that draws those on-the-fence voters to my side. She doesn't know it yet, but I have deemed her to be my number two in the new version of the Steadman power couple. I just need to coach her up; feed her confidence, and I need to make sure Virginia doesn't publish that photo.
I move close to Stacie. She looks so sad and unsure of herself. Stacie needs to feel beautiful, and I need a fresh start. We both deserve this.
"I think you are a beautiful person, Stacie, and you are perfectly healthy."
I kiss her. Her soft cushiony skin feels nice.
"I really care about you, Stacie. You're awesome."
It's not enough to reassure her; I need to show her. I suggest we go to her bedroom. She leads me up the long staircase and down a long hallway to a very bright bedroom. She has the biggest bed I've ever seen. It's a canopy bed with lots of yellow lace adorning it. I didn't think they existed anymore. I sat on the side of the bed, taking it all in. Strangely I feel like I'm back in Chester peering into Mary Ellen's bedroom. I was thirteen when I begged her to leave her bedroom window open for me after her parents went to sleep. I climbed a tree and had to launch myself at least five feet to Mary Ellen's front porch roof. What lengths a pubescent kid will go to for a chance to be alone in the dark with a pretty girl, but my landing on the roof made such a racket I woke her parents up.
"Go, go, you woke them up," Mary Ellen whispered loudly.
As I flung myself back to the tree, a branch caught me in the nuts. I slid down it, praying my balls were still attached and not left dangling on a branch. Oh, the pain, the ripping, excruciating pain. Luckily, my balls remained intact. To this day, I find it ironic that instead of getting felt up by Mary Ellen, I got sexually assaulted by her big oak tree.
I try to get my mind to focus on what is about to happen next and not on
the little bear figures that adorn Stacie's shelves. As we kiss, I mentally take myself out of this teenage girl's bedroom and back to my college dorm room with my beautiful Rose lying aloofly across my bed. I'm back with her, and it's the first time; I'm so in awe of her. I know I'm not worthy of her. She looks like a Greek goddess; her long black hair scatters widely around her head like a haunting silhouette, like black fire against my white sheets. She didn't have to move or gesture; the pure sight of her naked breasts, her milky white skin, the black fluff between her long legs made my cock hard. I concentrate; I take my time. Oh Rose, my fantasy, my dark ghost. I miss you. I want you still.
"I love you," I say to Rose, but Stacie is the one that hears me.
Part 2
Enigma Rose
Chapter 40 – Stacie
"Your dad tells me you are quite the runner. I bet you have a lot of medals?"
"I have some," JJ says as he takes another bite of his pepperoni pizza.
"I used to play soccer in high school. There's a lot of running in soccer," I say, trying to keep the conversation going.
"You don't look like you play sports," JJ mumbles as he continues to chew.
"JJ, you can finish your pizza downstairs if you want," Josh says, trying to change the subject.
JJ doesn't respond. He gets up, grabs his plate, and leaves the kitchen.
"He's fine, Josh. He could have stayed. I want to get to know your son."
"He doesn't take his meds on Saturdays. There is no telling what he will do or say. He lacks basic social cues, Stacie; it's for the best. You will have plenty of opportunities to get to know JJ."
"I know, but I want him to like me. I know I can't take the place of Melissa, but I want us to be close friends."
"Don't force it. It will happen naturally. You are the sweetest person I know, and he will see it too. We have a lifetime for you to charm him and to charm this city as my wife and the first lady of Fairview."
