Falling for My Son's Best Friend: An Age Gap BWWM Forbidden Romance

by Andrea L. Smith

  This feeling, oh, I want more of it. More of the satisfaction that Nate gives me. More bliss.

  But what about Jude?

  I push the accompanying guilt away. I’m a grown-ass woman and I’m free to live my life how I want. And hell, I effing will.

  What Jude doesn’t know won’t hurt him.

  CHAPTER THIRTEEN

  “We’re going to hell for this, I swear.” I shimmy in my skirt in a hurry while checking the time. Ten minutes before my meeting with a high-profile client, and here I am, fresh from a quickie on my desk with Nate. It’s not the first time. I’ve lost count of the many times we’ve fucked on that desk, the couch near the window, my apartment, hotels in the city….

  Each encounter is always the last, at least, until we touch. The minute our bodies connect, I forget my intention to end our affair.

  It’s like an out-of-body experience each time; his touch revving me up, his lips taking me towards the edge, and his dick killing me softly with each hard, purposeful stroke. I’m falling; fast, deep, losing my way, but I don’t care. I just want to bask in the moments and get my fill.

  A part of me doesn’t want this to end, but it has to. There’s no future for us. We’re from different worlds, bonded only by our lust for each other. But sometimes I yearn for a change.

  It's not just about the sex anymore. Lately, its been so easy to forget Nate’s careless past because he’s improved so much. I see a focused, determined man who’s willing to admit his mistakes and fix the damage to his father’s legacy. He’s not the lazy time waster I thought he was—well, not anymore. He works hard, and for the past six months, Frost & Co. has been climbing to the top again. I’m so proud of his maturity. He’ll make a lucky woman happy someday.

  Sometimes, late at nights, when the wine has gone to my head and I’m curled under the covers, lonely, I wish that woman was me.

  It’s crazy, I know. Jude would never approve.

  “Hey, what’s wrong?” Nate asks, buttoning his shirt.

  “Nothing.”

  “Your face says something else.”

  “I’m fine. Can you hurry? I have a meeting in a few minutes.”

  He doesn’t reply, just comes up to me and takes my mouth for a kiss. I taste him for a moment before pulling back. “My meeting…”

  “Next time, we’re doing this right. My apartment, with soft music and candlelight.”

  “Uh, no we’re not. This is an affair, remember? Not romance. Save it for your little girlfriends.”

  He opens his mouth, then closes it with a sigh.

  My cell phone rings. Seeing Jude’s name on the screen sends me in a frenzy. “Shit.” I grab my top from the desk and pull it over my head.

  “Hey, easy. He can’t see you.”

  Of course.

  Blowing a breath, I swipe the screen, putting the phone on speaker while I adjust my top. “Hey, sweetie.”

  “Mom. What happened last night?”

  “Huh?”

  “Your date. You didn’t show up.”

  Oh, boy. I should have expected his call. Jude’s been trying to hook me up with his coworker Denver for a while. I shouldn’t have given in to his pressure and agreed to a date. I wanted to get him off my back, so I did.

  But last night I laid out my outfit, took a shower, and was amid drying off when I realized I didn’t want to go. So, I called Denver and asked for a rain check. It’s an indefinite one, honestly. I’m really not feeling him. “Denver and I already spoke. Why are you calling me about this?”

  “Because he’s a great guy, mom. Your type. I don’t want you to blow it.”

  Nate leans against my desk, folding his arms with a scowl.

  “He’s really great, Jude. But I’m not interested.”

  Nate relaxes, releasing his arms before jamming them in his pockets. But a tiny frown remains.

  “I thought you wanted to settle down.”

  “I do, but—”

  “But what, you’d rather someone who just wants to get between your legs?”

  “Jude!” He’s never spoken to me like this. What the hell has gotten into him?

  Realization dawns, bringing with it a sickening feeling. Jude knows. Frigging hell, he knows.

  He roughly sighs on the other end. “I’m sorry. That was too much.”

  My fingers tremble as I pick up the phone. “Honey, can we talk about this later? I have a meeting.”

  “Sure. I’ll call you.”

  “Shit,” Nate says, when I end the call. “That was a little intense.”

  “Shit is right.” I put my shoes on in a flurry of panic and disappointment. “We need to end this.”

  “Why?”

  “Weren't you listening to our conversation? Jude knows about us!”

  Nate pushes out his lips with a headshake. “Nah. He would’ve wanted to kick my ass by now.”

  “No, he wouldn’t.” I know my son. Not only does he hate confrontations, he has the patience of a saint. He’s watching, waiting for us to end the affair. He’ll throw subtle hints here and there, like he did just now, but that’s the furthest he’ll go. “But trust me, he knows. Didn’t you hear what he said about me wanting a guy who’s only after sex?”

  “Yeah, but it could mean anyone. It’s certainly not me.”

  I don’t even want to know what he means by that. “It doesn’t matter. We have to quit.” Using the side of my foot, I slide his shoes to him. He ignores them.

  “What if I don’t want to fool around anymore, Alison?” He exhales softly, reaching for my hand. “What if I want something more?”

  I jerk my hand from his, sure my face shows the internal shock. “Have you lost your mind?” My response comes in a whisper, as if there’s someone lurking nearby.

  “No, I haven’t.” He palms the back of his head, giving me a tentative smile. “I think I’m falling in love with you, Alison.”

  It’s like the release of a thousand butterflies in my stomach, but I dismiss the overwhelming feeling. “Now I know you’ve lost your mind.”

  He chuckles, but it’s not a happy one. “Why?”

  “Because you can’t love me, Nate, and I can’t love you. It’s not right. We shouldn’t have gotten here.”

  “But we’re here. And I’m telling you how I feel.”

  I reach for his phone on the desk, extending it to him. “And I’m telling you it’s not real. That’s the problem with you kids. A few good tumble in the sack and you think you’re in love.”

  He grabs the phone with a scowl. “Now, I’m a kid, right? Not when I was—”

  “Don’t even say it, mister. Just go.”

  But he doesn’t move. He faces me with a passionate stance. “Look in my eyes, Alison, and tell me you don’t feel the same.”

  “Nate, it’s time for my meeting. Go, please.”

  “I’m not leaving. Not until you say it.”

  I fold my arms across my chest and look him square in his face. “I’m not in love with you. You were just a fling, an itch I had to scratch. I’m done talking about this, and I’m done with you.” I almost bite my tongue with the lie.

  His expression darkens, and not with lust like I’m accustomed to. It’s fury. He grabs his jacket from where it rests on the chair. “I get the message, loud and clear.”

  The door slams hard on his exit, the sound like a hammer on my heart.

  CHAPTER FOURTEEN

  Nate

  “Nate, are you for real right now?”

  “Don’t start, Jude.”

  “What the hell do you mean by, don’t start? I brought Mila here for you, not as a third wheel. But you’ve been moping around like your dog just died. You’re killing our vibe, man.”

  I release a harsh breath while sinking onto the edge of the bed in Jude’s guest bedroom.

  I never should have agreed to Jude’s plan to hook me up with his girlfriend’s younger sister. It seemed a good idea at the time, a way to escape my week-old funk, but after getting to Jude’s a
partment tonight, I realize my mistake.

  Mila’s absolutely beautiful. Definitely my type, with her cute bangs and big blue eyes and a body that’s saying something. The old me would have jumped right on it, probably would have been banging her on this bed. But I want more than sexual attraction; something deeper, longer-lasting.

  “Seriously, what’s gotten into you? I’ve never seen you so down in the dumps.”

  “I have a lot on my mind, that’s all.”

  “Like what? Is it about the company? I thought the board voted in your favor.”

  “Yeah, they did.” One hundred percent. Gary tried to challenge me for control, but he lost miserably. None of the board members wanted new leadership. They gave me a compassionate pass and a chance to prove myself. Which I did. Frost & Co. has just experienced the best quarter since my dad died. We’re almost back to normal.

  “Great! So we should celebrate, man. Let’s get back to the party.”

  “I’m really not feeling it. Think I’ll head home.”

  Jude leans against the dresser with his arms folded. “Who are you, and what have you done with my friend?”

  “I’m still here. But I’m not into Mila.”

  “What about that girl we met at the club last Saturday?” He snaps his fingers. “Katie, yeah, that’s it. You weren’t feeling her too, right? And the one who scribbled her number on your coffee cup yesterday. I guess she wasn’t your type.”

  “None of them were.”

  “Bro, when was the last time you got laid?”

  “I don’t remember.” When I made love to Alison on her desk. It’s still so vivid in my mind, her soft, sexy moans as I stroke her from behind, her fingers gripping the edge.

  Alison and I agreed on a fling. But after six months, it became more than that. I didn’t want to leave her bed at the end of the night. I grew tired of sneaking around in her office.

  For the entire time we messed around, she’d never been to my apartment. We did everything on her terms, in her time. It was quite a workable arrangement in the beginning, when I accepted that was all we could be. Fuck buddies. But over time, it wasn’t enough.

  Alison has no clue how she inspires me. She contributed to all I’ve achieved since I returned to Frost & Co. I wanted to succeed, not just for my father’s memory, but to prove to her I’m a man who fixes anything I break. I wanted to be worthy of her love.

  But, my bad. I’m not. She’s made that clear enough. It was like a punch in the gut, her rejection. She wanted a relationship, just not with me.

  What did she say? I’m an itch she wanted to scratch. Major fucking burn.

  I’ve never cried over a woman. Until that night. I’ve never felt such hurt. And even though my mind tries to move on, my heart’s still stuck in the past, with her. I need to move on, I know. But right now, I just want to wallow in my misery.

  “Come on, man. Seriously. Tell me who she is.”

  “Who?”

  “The woman who’s turned you into a schmuck.”

  I don’t buy Alison’s assumption that Jude suspects us. I doubt he’d be so cool with me if he knew I fucked his mom. So I talk freely, knowing he has no clue. “I’m not telling you who she is. But I’m in love with her.”

  Jude stares at me for a long moment before laughing out loud.

  “What?”

  “You?” he replies, when he’s finished laughing. “You, in love? Yeah, right, and there’s winter in hell.”

  I push up from the bed, a little impassioned, wanting to bare my soul. “Man, you are just as surprised as I am. But I love her. It’s not a fluke or an illusion. I see myself with her.”

  “Then what’s the problem?”

  “She wanted an affair, nothing else. She kicked me to the curb.”

  “Ouch.”

  “Yeah, and you’d think my stupid heart would get the message. But she’s the kind of woman you meet only once. The connection we have, I doubt I’ll find it with someone else.”

  “Wow. She must be one heck of a woman.”

  “You have no idea, bro.” I sink back to the bed, blowing a breath. “No idea.”

  “So, what are you going to do? Fight for her? Or walk away?”

  “I don’t know. What if she rejects me again?”

  Jude releases his arms and eases from the desk. “You won’t know until you try. But, go home, Nate, there’s nothing for you here. Take the back door if you want to. I’ll tell Mila you had an emergency.”

  “Thanks, man. Appreciate it.” We knock fists and I make my out, feeling lighter than I have in days. Until it hits me. Jude has no clue he’s just advised me to pursue his mom.

  CHAPTER FIFTEEN

  Alison

  “Can we change the subject, please? I’m done talking about Nate.”

  “For now,” Brooke replies, then ducks as I swat her with the menu.

  “Forever.”

  “You don’t mean that.”

  If my friends won’t change the subject, I will. “How’s your marriage, Karen?”

  She rolls her eyes at the sudden segue, then bursts into a dreamy smile. “It’s going great. Still on cloud nine. Still having amazing sex…”

  “Oh, I hate you.”

  “I second that,” Brooke murmurs.

  “All you need to do is join the club, ladies. Alison, you need to quit being an idiot and go get your man. Brooke… what’s up with you, anyway?”

  “What do you mean?” Brooke tucks a lock of hair behind her ear and her cheeks redden.

  Karen eyes narrow and I zero in. “I know that look. You found a man, didn’t you?”

  She vigorously shakes her head. “No, I haven’t.”

  “Liar.” Karen says.

  “There’s no fooling us, Brooke,” I add. “That’s the blush of a woman who got laid. And well.”

  She grins, raising her hands in surrender. “Fine. I got laid. But it was just a one-night stand.”

  I understand the sudden concern on Karen’s face. I feel the same way. “You don’t do one-night stands, Brooke.” Since her relationship ended, I doubt she’s been with anyone. I’ve never seen this sparkle in her eyes before.

  “I know, right? But believe me, it was worth letting my guard down, for once. I keep reliving the night in my head.”

  “When did you meet him?” Karen asks.

  “Last week, when I visited my parents in San Francisco. He literally rescued me from a mugger and I thanked him over dinner. That’s all it should have been. But one thing led to another…”

  Karen palmed her chest. “Oh, my.”

  “That smile, though,” I say to Brooke. “If I didn’t know better, I’d think there’s more to that one-night stand.”

  “There isn’t. Kmele’s the kind of man a woman tastes once. It’s risky going back for more.”

  “He’s that good?” Karen asks.

  Brooke signs the cross on her chest while looking upwards. “Oh, girl… the sex was fierce. Kmele, he knows how to lay the pipe, and lay it good.”

  “Ooh, girl.”

  “But even if I wanted more, it’s impossible. He’s all in the way in San Francisco and I’m trying to find a new job here in New York. I’d never travel all the way out there for some dick, off-the-chain or not.”

  “Speaking of which, how’s the job hunt going?”

  “I have an interview with a retail chain on Monday. They’re looking for a new finance director.”

  “Fingers crossed, I hope this is it,” I reply.

  “Yeah, me t—”

  “You have got to be kidding me.” Karen’s staring behind me, disbelief flooding her expression. I try to turn around but she stops me.

  “Don’t look.”

  “Huh?” Now I want to look. I shake off her hold and shifts in my chair.

  And wish I didn’t.

  Nate’s standing at the entrance to the restaurant, waiting for the host to seat him—and the smoking-hot girl by his side. She’s wearing a crop top and high-waist jeans wit
h stilettos. A ten, for sure. Definitely his type and his age.

  They make such a stunning couple. I can’t lie. But watching them, it leaves a heaviness in my gut.

  “Oh, Alison, I’m so sorry,” Brooke says.

  “For what, hon?” I force a smile while stirring my milkshake. “I told you, I ended the affair.”

  “Yeah, but you didn’t want to,” Karen replies.

  “It had to end, Karen. We were growing too close. I had to choose my son or my lover. There’s no way Nate and I could work, so I chose my son.”

  “Mhmm…” Karen cocks her head while sipping her drink.

  “Stop looking at me like that.”

  “How?”

  “Like you do when you think you’re right about something.”

  “Which is?”

  “I don’t know. But I think you’re about to tell me.”

  She grins. “Why do you think Jude won’t approve?”

  “I can’t believe you’re asking me that. Not only is he Jude’s best friend, Nate’s old enough to be my son.”

  Karen’s brows lift. “And? Have you forgotten Aaron’s age? Or when you told me age is just a number sis, go for it?”

  I release the straw with a sigh and recline in my seat. “It’s not the same. You were in love with Aaron. A blind man could see it.”

  “And you’re not in love with Nate?” Brooke says. “Girl, give us a break.”

  I close my eyes, throwing my head back. I’ve never said it out loud. Not to myself, or anyone. But I am, God knows, I am.

  “I get that you’re scared. I understand how it feels. Took a little arm twisting for me to admit it, remember?” Karen taps my hand, her soft smile directed to me. “But I’m telling you, it's okay.”

  “But it’s too late.”

  “Girl, you never know.”

  “Did you see the life-size Barbie he’s with? He’s clearly moved on.”

  Karen opens her mouth to reply, but her eyes lift and widen. Brook delivers a sudden kick to my shin. I don’t need to look. Nate’s approaching our table.

  With his Barbie.

  I try to summon a smile, but it falls flat. I can’t bear seeing them together.