Bucked

by Tara Sue Me

  “You didn’t ask Orson to buy you a pregnancy test,” Kelly reminded her. Which was true. Had Kiara bought the test herself, Kelly would be none the wiser because Kiara could pass off Lenora's words as the ramblings of an unstable person.

  “I need to tell him,” Kiara said. “And I will. Soon. I have to wrap my head around it first.”

  “What will you do?”

  Kiara shrugged. “I’m keeping it.” She cringed because she hated calling the living bundle of cells growing inside her an ‘it.’ “If Orson wants nothing to do with him or her, it won’t change how I feel.” Not that Orson would be like that. Not after he talked about how he would raise his children.

  “I don’t see Orson as a person who would shun his own child,” Kelly said, echoing Kiara’s thoughts.

  “I don’t, either, but aren’t you the one always telling me I need to look at all the potential outcomes and not just the ones I want to happen?”

  Kelly looked surprised she’d remembered, though Kiara wasn’t sure why. Her sister had repeated it enough through the years. “Sure I am, but why take my advice now?”

  Kiara put on her bravest face. “I’m going to be someone’s mother, and that frankly, scares the shit out of me. I decided maybe I should consider some of the advice I get instead of letting it go in one ear and out the other.”

  “You'll be a great mother.” Kelly took the hand Kiara had on top of the table and gave it a squeeze. “And I’m going to be an aunt! I can’t believe it!”

  For a few minutes they talked and laughed about all the things they said as kids that they would never do when they had children, and how they probably do those exact things. Kiara enjoyed the time to simply sit and be lighthearted with her sister.

  “Do you think Orson remembers what his stepmother said about me being pregnant?” Kiara asked.

  Kelly appeared to think about the question. “I’m not sure. I only knew because I was with Jedidiah when he gave his. As far as I know, Jed hasn't visited Orson in the hospital. There's been no one to remind him.”

  Kiara didn't know why she thought it important Orson remembered what Lenora said. Even if he did, there was no way he would suspect she'd been correct. Maybe that was what bothered her. If he'd heard his stepmother's last words, perhaps it wouldn't come as such a shock when he learned the truth. If he hadn't heard, the news would probably blindside him. Kiara knew how that felt, and she wanted to protect Orson from experiencing something similar.

  In the end, though, did it matter?

  “Orson gave his statement to an officer while he was in the hospital,” Kelly continued. “I wasn’t present when he did, so I’m not sure. And it’s not one of those things you just happen to mention in conversation, you know?”

  Kiara snorted. Yeah, she couldn’t think of a slick way to work that into a conversation. Glad you’re feeling better. Remind me what it was again your stepmother said right before you passed out from pain and your neighbor shot her in the head to keep her from stoning you? Not something that flowed naturally from your tongue.

  “If you need anything, and I mean anything,” Kelly said. “A place to stay. Someone to talk with. Or just someone to listen, you know I’m here for you.” She leaned over, and spoke toward Kiara’s still flat belly. “And that goes for you, too.”

  Chapter 28

  Orson/Kiara

  Two days later, Orson made his way to the administrative building on the ranch’s main property, shocking his admin, Lynda, who more than likely, didn’t expect to see him for another week or two. What could he say? Without Kiara in his house, he had no reason to hang out there.

  “Orson,” Lynda said. “You must be feeling better, we didn’t expect back so soon. Good to see you.”

  Why must he be feeling better? Did he feel better? Better than what exactly? “Thank you,” was all he said as he awkwardly moved toward his office. Damn foot.

  Once inside, he closed his door, but instead of going to his desk, shuffled to stand in front of his favorite wall on the entire property. Most of the space was empty, but here and there along the length of the wall, he’d put up pictures of the families who’d stayed at the ranch. One day, he hoped to have the entire wall covered.

  He was an only child. He had no aunt or uncles that he knew of, and he’d heard no one mention anything about his grandparents. The pictures represented the family he’d created by himself for himself. Every time he stood in front of them, though, he realized it was nowhere near the same.

  It’d be easy enough to find a willing woman, settle down, and be part of a real family. Call him either a cynic or a dreamer, but he didn’t want an imitation. He wanted the real thing. To be utterly and foolishly in love, the way he saw Evan and Kelly were. To be stronger together with one person than he could ever be on his own. And to become a better person because of their presence in his life. Anything short of spectacular, he’d pass on. Better to be alone.

  What hurt, though, was he thought he had it. In the hospital when he’d inadvertently told Kiara he loved her, her expression had given him hope he’d found the one who would be his forever. In that second, every tear he’d ever cried had been worth it because it lead him to her.

  They hadn’t known each other long at all, but the time they’d spent together had been raw and real. They’d shared their deepest fears and darkest parts of their souls. In fact, their talks had often been more intimate than the time they spent in bed or in the playroom. They probably knew each other better than most people who had known each other for years.

  He wanted her then and still wanted her now. He doubted that would ever change. Somehow he’d always known she would be it for him. There would never be anyone he desired more. What he had to do was to make her want him just as much. The question was, how to go about doing that? Could it even happen?

  He turned from the pictures, refusing to think that way. The first step in being defeated was admitting you could be defeated. Nothing would defeat him today. He took his phone from his pocket and made a call.

  “Kelly,” he said when she answered. “I need your help.”

  Later that evening, Kiara walked with Kelly up the stairs to the administrative building at the ranch. Kelly had asked her to go shopping with her to find a gift for their mom and dad’s anniversary. Not long into the drive, she mentioned she had to pick something up for Evan at the ranch, and that it’d only take a minute.

  On the off chance Orson was walking around, which didn’t seem likely, but you could never be too cautious, Kiara said she’d wait in the car. To which Kelly replied for her to get her ass out of the car. Right. Now. Kiara followed her with a scowl on her face the entire way.

  Kiara had been under the assumption whatever Kelly needed to pick up would be at the admin desk. Obviously, that had been the wrong assumption, because Kelly walked past it and continued down a hall.

  The room was huge, and as soon as they stepped inside, Kiara knew it belonged to Orson. A large wooden desk faced what was more window than wall. Two leather chairs sat in a nearby corner where two walls of bookshelves met. The fourth wall had a few things posted on it, but Kira couldn’t make out what they were from where she stood. She felt like shrinking back into the hall.

  Kelly, on the other hand, marched right inside to the desk, and shuffled through the papers on top. When she didn’t find what she was looking for right away, Kiara stepped inside and walked to the wall to see what Orson had decorated it with.

  They were family pictures. Families who stayed at the ranch. Unexpected, yet somehow making complete sense when she thought about it and put it together with the conversation they’d had about the reasons he ran the ranch the way he did.

  A shuffle at the door of the office caught her attention, and she looked up. Orson stood in the doorframe. Or stood as well as he could with his foot. He appeared so much healthier then he had the last time she'd seen him, even though it’d only been a few days. Stronger, somehow.

  Kelly noticed his arrival
at the same time and gave Kiara a wink. “I’m out of here.”

  “What?” Kiara asked.

  “You’re in good hands,” Kelly told her. “I wouldn’t leave otherwise.”

  With Kelly gone, the two of them remained silent until Orson closed the door behind him. “Come sit with me.” He led the way to the two leather chairs in his odd shuffle/walk. It didn’t even occur to her to say no. He asked, and she followed.

  “Nice book collection,” she said. It was impressive, covering nearly two walls.

  He looked over them with a smile, as if greeting friends. “When I was a child, we never had money for books. You could say I’ve overcompensated, but when I look at them, they make me happy.”

  “I’m glad,” she said. “You deserve happiness.”

  He lifted an eyebrow. “You still think so even after I had your sister lie to bring you to me?”

  “Yes, but I may still kick her ass.”

  “Not mine?”

  She shook her head and looked down. Now, she told herself. She needed to tell him she was pregnant, but he spoke first.

  “Tell me, Kiara, and be honest. What would you like to see happen between the two of us?”

  She hadn’t expected him to be so straightforward, though she wasn’t sure why. He deserved her straightforwardness as well, but she hesitated. There was too much at stake. What if she made a move, and he laughed? Or if he shrugged her off. Patted her on the head like she was a little sister or, worse, a friend.

  But when she looked in his eyes, he wasn’t looking at her as if she were a sister or a friend. He looked at her with a quizzical expression and a hint of something else. So, she took a deep breath, looked him straight in the eyes, and told him the truth.

  “I’m scared.”

  “Of me?” he asked.

  “Several things, but no, you’re not one of them.” She took a deep breath. “I’m scared when you don’t need my help any more that you won’t want to see me again.”

  He tilted his head. “Why would you think that?”

  “We never agreed to anything permanent, exclusive, or even serious. I thought you were only interested in fulfilling your fantasies from over the summer.” She shrugged. “You said nothing to make me think otherwise. Outside of that day in the hospital and I thought you were high on painkillers.”

  “I wasn’t and to be honest, I didn’t mean to say that to you then. You said nothing suggesting that you wanted anything other than the occasional scene in my playroom, either.”

  She found it hard to believe they had both been so stupid about how the other was feeling. So much for all that talk about honesty and how those who practiced BDSM had relationships with above average communication skills. “I think we’ve gone way beyond the occasional scene.”

  “Okay, maybe I exaggerated that part a bit,” he conceded.

  “You think?” She shifted toward him. “I think for two people who said they would be honest with each other, we’ve kinda sucked.”

  He leaned over. The chairs were close enough for him to brush the hair from her face. “I want you here with me, but I understand if you need to go home, or back to Kelly and Evan’s for a while. If you go, please know I want much more than the occasional playroom scene with you. I’ll take whatever you’re willing to give me. Whether that be serious, exclusive, or permanent.”

  She couldn’t believe her ears had heard the words he said correctly. All this time she’d thought he couldn’t possibly want anything to do with her beyond the time she’d be in his house. She’d laugh if she wasn’t so mad at herself for misreading everything and the secret she still hadn’t told him.

  “Why didn’t you ever say anything?” she asked.

  “I guess I’m scared, too. I’ve never felt like this about anyone before.”

  “That makes two of us,” she said. He drew her close, so she rested in his lap, and then leaned in for a soft kiss, but she pulled back before it could go any further. “We need to work more on our communication skills and being honest.”

  “I'm being honest when I say I want to stop talking and kiss more,” he said with a smile.

  Now that it was time for her to be completely honest and tell him everything, her stomach twisted in knots. Enough for him to tell something was up.

  “Kiara?” he asked, brows knitted together in worry.

  She swallowed and told herself she would not get sick. Thus far in her pregnancy, she’d avoided any morning sickness, and she would not puke up her guts now. “I have something to tell you. I haven’t been completely honest with you about something.”

  Now he looked even more worried, if that were possible. Strange, because she’d have thought if anything he’d be mad.

  But even when she didn’t answer right away, he spoke calmly. “Kiara? What is it? You can tell me.”

  She took his hand. For some reason, that made talking to him easier. Grounded her, for lack of a better way to describe it. His hand squeezed hers in support. Her thumb caressed the back of his hand, drawing lazy circles. “I’m pregnant.”

  The reassuring smile from seconds before froze in place. His eyes grew wide. “What?”

  “My period was late. I didn’t think anything of it, because I’ve never been regular. But when Lenora said what she did, I took a test. It was positive.” She couldn’t tell what he was thinking; his face went blank.

  “You’re pregnant.”

  It was a statement, not a question, so she didn’t reply. His tone of voice gave nothing away, either. She dropped her head. It would hurt too much to see disappointment or worse yet, guilt in his expression.

  He gently lifted her head. “You’re pregnant,” he repeated, but this time his words were accompanied by a joyful smile so big she couldn’t stop her own. He pulled her close, his embrace almost crushing. “Oh my, God. Kiara, you’re pregnant.”

  His joy at the unexpected and unplanned news washed over her, smothering her worries. She closed her eyes, enjoying the feel of being in his arms again. “I was afraid you’d be upset.”

  “Surprised and shocked? Yes, but upset? No, not in the least.” He slid his fingers through her hair, cupping the back of her head in his palm. “It’s not the way I planned it, and it’s not the time I thought it would be, but I meant what I said in the hospital. I love you, Kiara. You’re it for me. You’re the woman I want, need, and desire. You’re the only one I want to grow old with, and the only one I want to be the mother of my children. So we have kids sooner than we thought we would, who cares?”

  His words were the balm she hadn’t known she’d needed, and she responded with the only words she knew of that could come close to conveying everything she felt at the moment. “I love you, Orson.”

  Chapter 29

  Orson

  Looking back later, it always amazed Orson they actually did anything following her declaration of love. Between him not wanting to do anything to harm the baby, and her not wanting to hurt his ribs or foot, it was impressive they even made it into the bedroom. Once there, he soon realized how insistent Nurse Kiara could be. As it turned out, Kelly was not the only Bowman twin with dominant tendencies. Though Kiara wrapped hers in the guise of “medical necessity.”

  No matter, by the time she had him arranged in a way as not to put a strain on either ribs or foot, he was so hard he saw stars. While he rested reclined with his injured foot propped up, she took her dear sweet time undressing. Clearly, she did so on purpose to entice him further. He’d give anything to flip her over his knee and redden her backside.

  Soon, he told himself. For the moment he’d sit here and enjoy the show she put on for him. And what a show it was. As soon as her last article of clothing hit the floor, she turned. Instead of climbing on the bed to be with him, she closed her eyes and swayed her hips in a sensual dance that would be the end of him.

  “Kiara,” he warned.

  She cracked one eye open, but didn’t move other than to drag her fingers along her side until she got to her b
reast.

  “Are you going to join me?” he asked.

  She answered by circling and pinching her nipple.

  He narrowed his gaze. “I’m keeping track and as soon as the doctor says I’m good, your ass is mine.”

  She lifted her hands above her head, still swaying, but this time showing off her perfect tits. “How many am I up to now?”

  “Spanks?” he asked, and at her nod replied, “Twenty.”

  “Let me know when I hit thirty.”

  He bit back a chuckle. “You’re nothing but trouble, you know that, right?”

  Moving like she had all the time in the world, she crawled on top of the bed with her ass high in the air. “True.” Spreading her legs wider than needed to straddle him, but ensuring he saw every part of her, she situated herself above his cock. “But I’m your trouble.”

  “Damn straight.” And he’d fight anyone who said otherwise.

  She took her time lowering herself onto his cock. His eyes rolled to the back of his head. Jesus. She felt so tight like this. Having only taken part of him, she lifted up and lowered herself again, taking more each time. Over and over, she repeated the up and down movements, until she had his entire length inside her. Then she remained still.

  “Fuck. Kiara.” If she didn’t move soon, he’d take her the way he wanted, ribs and foot be damned.

  Thankfully, she moved. Faster. Faster. Until he worried she moved too fast and took him too deep.

  “Careful,” he said. “Don’t want to hurt the baby.”

  She stopped midway down. “You don’t really want me to give you an anatomy lesson on female genitalia right now, do you?”

  “Fuck, no.”

  She sank the rest of the way down. “Then trust me, nothing we’re doing is hurting our baby.” His hands were on her hips. She put hers on top and entwined their fingers. “I promise.”