The First

by Mel Wildes

  “Um, could we rain check that night cap? I’m feeling pretty tapped out,” I looked to him nervously, hoping I hadn’t just inadvertently rejected the best date I’d ever had.

  “Of course,” he whispered, lifting his hand to my cheeks and caressing them. He was observing me again.

  “What’s so interesting about me that you find yourself in deep thought around me constantly?” I asked boldly as I leaned my back against the closest wall, Marcus following my suite as he leaned one arm to the side of me and stood directly in front of me. Even the way he stood screamed sex appeal.

  “Well, I’m just imagining what you look like underneath that dress.” He bit his lips and I found myself unable to control my urges to kiss him. Leaning into him, I kissed his lips, opening my mouth ever so slightly to allow space for his tongue to explore. Pushing me into the wall, his hands traced the curve of my stomach and landed on the curve of my ass. Wrapping my arms around his neck, I pushed my breasts into his hard chest and could hear him moan into my mouth. “Zadie,” he murmured as I felt the front part of his pants begin to rise.

  “Z?” a familiar voice entered my hazy state. Breaking away from Marcus, I turned to the voice and felt my stomach turn around in knots. There, stepping out of my elevator was Alfie with an expression I had never seen before, jealously.

  “Alfie? What are you doing here?” I asked in confusion, stepping away from Marcus as I attempted to straighten myself up. Marcus was adjusting himself, standing a little straighter as he faced Alfie.

  “You weren’t answering your phone, I was worried,” he was speaking to me but his attention was fully focused on Marcus. “I need to talk to you.” He shifted his attention back at me and I crossed my arms in extreme agitation.

  “Not now,” I growled but he was unwavering.

  “Ugh, it’s alright Zadie. I should get going anyway,” Marcus chimed in and I felt my heart sink when he looked between the two of us, obviously uncomfortable. “I’ll text you,” he said to me before kissing my forehead.

  “I had fun tonight.” I smiled up at him as he squeezed my shoulder.

  “See you later, beautiful,” he murmured, turning on his heel and disappearing past the front doors of the building. When he was fully gone, I turned abruptly to Alfie who was looking at me with disgust.

  “Seriously? What were you going to do? Climb him here in the foyer?” He asked as he pressed the ‘up’ button outside the elevator.

  “What’s it to you? Last time I checked this is a lobby in a building where I’m renting an apartment. I can climb whomever I wish, it’s none of your business,” I pointed out, stepping into the elevator. He followed me in. If I hadn’t been so exhausted, I would’ve kicked him out.

  “It’s me, Z. We know everything about each other and this isn’t like you. You don’t dry hump random guys in the lobby of your apartment building,” he pointed out as he pressed my floor button and leaned against the opposing wall of the elevator. “Were you going to sleep with him?” I looked at him, unsure of whether I should be mad or flattered by the jealously he was exuding. I knew he was protective of me and I knew this jealously could only be from the prospect of losing some kind of place in my life but apart of me wanted to believe the jealously was from a place of love, non-platonic love.

  “You know, I’m not there yet. I can’t sleep with someone I don’t love. I don’t love him. Anyway, he’s Marcus Park. I can’t imagine he’d be able to wait for me to be ready,” I said in confusion. The elevator dinged at my floor and we both stepped out, making our way to my apartment.

  “If he can’t wait, he doesn’t deserve you,” Alfie pointed out as we reached my door. Looking to him, I offered him a small smile, my anger diminishing exponentially. As we walked into my apartment, I threw my bag and jacket onto the floor and slipped my feet out of my sandals. Making my way towards the lounge room, I turned and noticed Alfie still standing at the door, observing me.

  “You look,” he started, closing the door behind him and locking it, “beautiful.” I looked to him in awe. He had an affect on me, one where all it took was one look and I’d forget how mad I was at him.

  “Come on.” I walked over to him and grabbed a hold of his hands. “Penny tivoed last week’s episode of Dr. Who.” Following me into the lounge, he clasped his hands with mine, unwilling to let go.

  ***

  As the clock struck midnight, I got up from the lounge and made my way to the kitchen. Alfie remained seated, deep in thought and quieter than usual.

  “Would you like a glass of wine?” I asked from the kitchen.

  “Sure. Thanks,” he called out and I pulled out two glasses. Before I had a chance to retrieve the wine, he was at the doorway. “I-I have to tell you something,” he said reluctantly as he stepped into the kitchen and made his way to the counter. Leaning against it, he watched me carefully as I poured white wine into our glasses.

  “Is this the urgent news you were texting me about in the middle of my date?” I tried not to look too pissed off. Handing him the glass, he took it from me and observed it for a moment before taking a sip.

  “Yeah,” he confirmed and it was my turn to watch him. His expression was off and his exuberant personality was dimmed. He looked conflicted. Jumping up onto the kitchen counter, I sipped my wine and waited patiently for him to continue. “It’s Tiffany,” he said as he leaned his forearms on the counter beside me. I tried not to get annoyed that Tiffany was yet again the focal point of our conversation.

  “What happened?” I asked patiently.

  “I called off the engagement.” I felt like I could’ve fallen off the counter from the shock of his announcement.

  “W-what?” I sputtered, turning slightly toward him. “You just asked me to be your best man, yesterday,” I pointed out and he looked up at me, the confliction still evident in his face.

  “She asked me to marry her a few weeks ago and I got caught up in the moment and said yes. It wasn’t until yesterday that I started to question the entirety of the proposal,” he explained and I found myself fiddling with my wine glass, trying to comprehend it all. “You’ve always said you couldn’t be intimate with anyone unless you loved them and lately, I started to question why I didn’t apply the same logic to a lifelong commitment.” Sculling the remainder of his wine, he pushed the glass away and lifted himself off the counter.

  “I’m confused, why didn’t you tell me you were engaged when it happened?” I asked, still fiddling with the glass.

  “Because nothing feels real in my life unless you’re apart of it and you not knowing meant I could pretend that I didn’t commit myself to a woman I barely knew.” Stepping away from the counter, he made his way toward me, standing directing in front me. Taking the glass out of my hand, he placed it on the counter beside his own and watched my face contort with confusion.

  “I don’t know what’s happening right now but I’m sorry to hear that you feel that way about Tiffany,” I lied. “I’m in a good place right now, I’m finally dating and whatever you’re trying to say right now, I’d prefer you didn’t.” I attempted to sound resilient in my words but I wasn’t sure I was pulling it off. Stepping closer, Alfie slid his hands across my bare thighs and pushed them open, giving himself enough space to situate himself between my legs. Lifting his arms around my waist, he slid his head over my shoulder and held onto me like I was some sort of life jacket.

  “Alfie,” I murmured and he clung to me like he’s never clung to me before. I hated that all it took was close proximity and I was putty in his hands.

  “I don’t want to confuse you but I also don’t want to lose you, Zadie. I can’t function without you but I also can’t push the limits between us because you’re more important to me than any girl I’ll ever be with.” After releasing his grip on me, he began to run his fingers through my curls.

  “You said you couldn’t be with Marcus because you didn’t love him. And I can’t promise you a lifetime of anything other than what we have right
now.” My breath began to hike up as he drew our faces close. “But, you love me and I love you. Maybe we should finish what we started ten years ago and you’ll have the freedom of knowing you were with someone who loved you inexplicably, your first time.” I began to understand what he was proposing.

  “You want me to be the one that takes my virginity?” I asked in surprise, leaning away from him for a moment.

  “We’ll spend one night together, finish what we started ten years ago and promise each other it won’t change anything.” He was almost pleading as his hands moved down my back, stopping at my hips. We had so many moments of almost in the past, but none had ever been on purpose. We didn’t dare test the waters when we had so much to lose. I had been waiting for this for a long time but I didn’t know if I could do it and not want more after the night was over. I couldn’t promise him my heart wouldn’t break after this. Leaning in closer, he ran his hands across my bare thighs. His eyes were relentless on my own, waiting for permission. “Zadie,” he murmured my name and I looked to him, unable to resist him and the warmth that was filling the space between my thighs. Maybe all I needed was one time to get it out of my system.

  “Okay,” I whispered, placing my hands over the top of his.

  “Okay?” He looked to me with wild lust-filled eyes. Nodding, I took his hand and guided it up my dress so he could feel how wet my panties had become. Groaning, he pulled his hands away and licked the wetness from his fingers. I felt like I could crumble in that moment. It was like we were different people. “You taste so sweet,” he murmured as he leaned into me and kissed the tip of my nose. Craning my neck back, I gave him enough space to trace his kisses from my neck to my mouth. “Zadie, look at me,” he demanded and I looked into his wild green eyes. “I love you,” he whispered wholeheartedly before kissing my lips gently. As the kiss deepened, he forced my mouth open with his tongue. It was an exhilarating feeling as his tongue and lips eagerly sucked my own. I hadn’t ever felt kisses like this with anyone else but him. His hands worked overtime, pushing the bottom of my dress up and over my protruding stomach, revealing my lacey black panties. Pulling away from the kiss, Alfie stepped back and observed me for a moment before reaching for my panties and ripping them off.

  “I love you, too.” He looked up to me and smiled before using his hands to push my back to the counter.

  “We’ll take this slow, okay?” At this, he fell to his knees and lifted my thick legs over his muscular shoulders. I felt like I could cum just from his touch. So much was happening that my mind couldn’t catch up to the reality of it. “Spread your legs, Zadie, let me see that beautiful pussy of yours,” he demanded and I spread my legs further apart. He moaned in ecstasy as one hand forced me down on the bench and the other messaged my wet slit. Dragging his finger across my silky folds, I felt like I was spiraling out of control. Without a moments notice, he plunged his index and middle finger into my pussy while messaging my clit with his thumb.

  “Alfie!” His fingers began to push in and out of my pussy slowly, his thumb gently stimulating my clit. “Alfie,” I moaned once more as I felt myself already on the verge of cumming. My fingers needed to latch onto something, and I cursed Tiffany in that moment for forcing him to chop off his magnificent curls.

  “Don’t cum yet, my tongue wants to taste you.” He removed his fingers from my pussy and leaned his mouth closer to my wetness. “Mhm, you smell amazing,” he whispered before plunging his tongue into my pussy. I whimpered at the feel of his soft mouth on me. Suddenly I felt like I wouldn’t be able to hold it off much longer. As my back began to arch and my toes curled, I found my body pushing down on his tongue. Reaching for his head, I grabbed it and pushed it closer to my pussy, not letting him come up for air. I could hear him groaning in pleasure as I began to grind against his mouth. Moving his arms around my hips, he held me tightly in place, unwilling to let go. As his tongue found its way to my clit, he sucked hard and I felt my body unable to hold it together anymore. I cried out in ecstasy, uncaring of who could hear.

  “Alfie!” As the constriction from my orgasm ripped me apart, I could feel my cum start to drip from my pussy and onto his face.

  “Shit, Zadie!” Alfie came up for air and I felt my body still vibrating from the remnants of my first male-induced orgasm. It was everything I imagined. Breathing heavily, I felt my legs grow limp on his shoulders. As I released my hold on him and looked up to the ceiling, I felt Alfie stand to his feet. Looking up at him, I took a little pride seeing my cum all over his mouth and stubble. “That was insane, I think I came a little,” he laughed as he used a kitchen cloth to wipe away the remnants of my orgasm from his face.

  “I’ve never felt anything like it before.” I looked to him in shock and he threw the cloth to the ground. Grabbing my arms he pulled me up to a sitting position and offered me a wicked smile.

  “You haven’t felt anything yet,” he assured me as he picked me up off the counter and swung me over his shoulder.

  “Alfie!” I squealed as he made his way toward my bedroom, unaffected by my weight on his shoulder. “I’m going to break you, put me down!” I started to hit him with my balled up fists but it did nothing to deter him.

  “Keep squealing, it’s just making me want to fuck you that much more,” he informed me as he kicked my door open. His words were shocking. After so many years of suppression, I was finding it hard to hear his words of desire for me. Was it only for the moment or was it something far deeper he’d been hiding for a long time? As we made it to my room, he pulled me off of his shoulder and threw me onto my unmade bed. Looking up at him in shock, I continued to try to wrap my head around this side of Alfie, a side I never thought I’d have the chance to meet again. He was strong, sexy and demanding. He knew what he wanted and he didn’t mess around. There were no grey areas, not in the bedroom anyway. Taking a step toward the bed, he held his hand out for me to take. Pulling me up off the bed, we stood toe-to-toe. His hands began to move down my back and stopped at my ass as he gave it a squeeze. He growled a little under his breath. “You don’t know how many nights I’ve dreamed of that ass of yours,” he confessed and I looked up at him in shock. “High school was the worse. Every single morning I woke up with the most painful erection.” He looked shy as he confessed something so intimate to me. It was confusing and arousing at the same time. He was blowing away every memory I had of our youth together, every insecure thought I had as a teen.

  “If it helps, high school with you wasn’t any easier for me,” I confessed as I stepped closer and pushed his covered erection against my stomach. It was as big as I remembered and extremely hard. Moving his hands to the back of my dress, he began to unzip it. Lifting my arms up, he tugged it over my breasts and threw it to the floor. For a moment, I felt self-conscious. Although he had seen me naked before, the moments were never sexualized. At least not since we were eighteen and my body had changed since then. I always assumed from his lack of reaction, he was never attracted to me.

  “Every time I see you like this…” He was frustrated as he pressed his forehead against mine. “Every single time I see you like this, I just want to bend you over and fill every inch of you.” His hands were on my breasts, messaging my nipples and I felt my body react in unimaginable ways, ways I didn’t know it could. “I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I told myself I wouldn’t say any of this. I would keep it together but you’re standing in front me and I can’t believe I’m this lucky.” Bending down he cupped one of my heavy breasts and captured its nipple in his mouth.

  “Don’t apologise,” I moaned as I pulled him away from my breasts so we were eye-to-eye. “Not tonight, tonight there is no holding back,” I assured him and he looked to me reluctantly. As I unbuckled his jeans and slid my hands down his abdomen and toward his cock, his breath became baited.

  “Zad…” he started but my mouth was on his in a matter of seconds. Sliding my hands down his length, he leaned his head back in ecstasy. As my thumb began to circle the tip, he q
uickly grabbed a hold of my hand and pulled it away. “If you do that, I will cum and I’m not ready to cum just yet.” Pulling his shirt over his chest, he revealed his incredible physique. Pulling down his pants and boxers, I couldn’t take my eyes away from the spectacular sight of his cock. It was just as I remembered, thick, long and standing up in all its glory, just for me. Stepping out of his boxers, he reached for the back of my bra and pulled it off. We were now fully naked in front of each other, something we had never been before. “I can’t get over how beautiful you are.” I felt myself burning with desire at his words. I couldn’t imagine a world where I loved anyone more than I loved him.

  “Fuck me, Alfie,” I whispered to him as I stepped toward him and wrapped my arms around his neck. It was such a wild thing to come out of my mouth, but I loved the sound of it.

  “Oh, I plan too.” He smiled wickedly as he picked me up and wrapped my legs around his waist. Kissing me on my lips, he walked us over to the bed and laid me down more gently this time. From my nightstand he picked up his wallet and pulled out a condom, ripping it open and pulling it over his cock. I looked on in fascination as he slid it over his length, effortlessly. Stepping onto the bed, he leaned over me and kissed my shoulder and my neck, before gently pulling my legs apart. “Are you ready for this?” I looked to him, as ready as I’d ever be.

  “Yes.” I kissed his neck and wrapped my arms around him as he looked me in the eye. I felt him shift his body on top of me until the head of his cock was gliding up and down the folds of my pussy. He was teasing me. “Alfie,” I laughed breathlessly and he chuckled sweetly before positioning it at my pussy and slowly gliding it in. It was a foreign feeling, a little uncomfortable at first. Alfie was slow, careful and in control the entire time.

  “Are you alright?” he checked on me but I was more than fine. As he began to slide in and out, I began to feel a different type of orgasm, something years of clitoral stimulation could never do.