by Beck, J. L.
“What’s wrong?” I shoot the two guards posted at the door, an accusing glare. They better not have touched her. “Did someone hurt you?”
“No, come sit.” She sniffs. “I need to talk to you.”
Hesitantly, I take the seat across from her. I know whatever she is about to tell me is not going to be good. I mentally prepare myself to hear what she has to say, but the truth is, nothing could have prepared me for what she says.
“You need to leave, Zane.” A semi-truck could have hit me, and I would feel less wounded. “You can’t stay here any longer. This…” She motions between us. “Whatever this is, it’s not working. We need to end this now before it gets any further.”
“Any further?” There is no further. We are already at the end. I’ve loved her for years, and she loves me back. “We are meant to be together.”
“No, we are not. I’m meant to be here. I’m meant to carry on the Castro name, and you don’t fit in here, at all.” I know she is playing. She doesn’t mean this, she can’t mean this, but hearing the words come out of her mouth, regardless of their truthfulness, hurts like hell.
“Just stop, Dove! I can’t listen to this shit. You and I both know that’s not true,” I growl. “Drop the act, I don’t care who is in the fucking room. Just stop!”
“This isn’t an act. I want you to leave, Zane. I need to do this. I need to marry Alberto, and you need to go your own way.”
I want to cover my ears with my hands, so I don’t have to listen to this or cover her mouth so she can’t get another word out. Either way, I can’t listen to this any longer.
“I’m not going anywhere,” I growl, ready to destroy something. Getting up from my seat, I start pacing around. “And I’m not letting you marry some fuckhead just because some guy tells you to.”
Twisting to fully face me, the words that come out of her mouth next cut me straight to the core. “I don’t want you, Zane. I don’t want to be with you, and the more you push me to do something I don’t want to do, the more I’ll push back. I want you to leave and not come back. I want you to forget about me and move on. I don’t want to be with you. I’m not in love with you.” Her expression is skewed, but her eyes tell me she is lying.
“You’re lying, you love me. I’ve protected you your whole life. You need me just as much as I need you.”
“I never asked you for any of that. I didn’t even know you were there most of that time!” I turn away from her, but she gets up from her seat and gets in front of me, so I have to look at her face. “Maybe I needed you before, but that’s because I thought you were all I had. I thought all my family was dead, but my father is alive, and he loves me. I don’t need you anymore.”
“Shut up,” I yell, stepping closer. Close enough to where she has to lift her head to look into my face.
“Just go, Zane. Don’t make this even harder than it already is. Just go...”
“I will never leave you. Never!” I grab her upper arm and hold her in front of me. I want to shake some sense into her. I want to make her understand, see how wrong this is.
“Let go of me,” Dove demands, her voice on edge, but that only makes me hold onto her tighter. I feel like if I don’t, she might disappear forever, slip away, and never return to me.
“Take your hand off of her,” one of the guards growls.
Turning to him, I snap, “She is mine, I touch her wherever and however I want.”
“I’m not yours!” Dove yells and shrugs out of my hold. Just when I thought this whole situation couldn’t get any worse, Dove says something that will haunt me for a very long time. “I don’t know how much clearer I can make it. I don’t want or need you. I don’t love you, and I want you to leave and never come back.” Before I can respond, she drives in the final nail. “Guards, please make him leave the house and don’t let him come back.”
“Dove! You can’t be serious?”
She backs away from me, moving out of reach. I try to take a step forward, reaching out my arms to her, but the two guards are already on me, pulling me back. I start to fight them, throwing punches at anything and everything I can reach. More men pile into the library, trying their best to get me under control.
I’ve lost count of how many men are fighting me, five or six… All I know is that I can’t let them win, I can’t let this happen. If I leave now, Dove will be all alone. I won’t be able to protect her from the outside.
I’m vaguely aware of Dove’s voice in the background, asking them not to hurt me. I almost laugh in the midst of all of this. They could throw acid on me, and it wouldn’t hurt as bad as the pain she is putting me through herself.
By the time the men have managed to shove me out of the room, my arms are worn out, and my muscles sore. I’m still healing from my last injuries, and I’m not at my strongest, but I can’t just give up either. So, I keep fighting them, even when everything hurts, even when my chest aches so much I think it might have cracked wide open. Even then, I keep fighting because right now, that’s the only thing I have left.
18
Zane’s face as the guards forced him off the property, still haunts me and it’s been days. The despair, the burning rage, and the way he yelled my name, telling me I didn’t mean it. I can still feel the sadness. It’s suffocating. I carried his heart in my hands. He gave me the one thing he’d never give anyone else, and I took it and crushed it. No matter what I do, I can’t forget. I can’t unfeel the pain I’ve caused.
In my father’s presence, I play the perfect daughter, a smile painted on my lips at all times. But behind closed doors, within the four walls of my room, I’m a blubbering mess, it’s like I’ve lost a piece of myself by letting him go.
Pressing the heels of my palms into my eyes, I will the tears away. I have to get it together. I have to. There is no other way to do this. It was either let him go or watch him die, and I’d rather have him hate me for a short time, thinking that I really didn’t want him, than to never have a future together.
Sucking a sharp breath into my lungs, I nearly jump off the bed when a knock echoes through the room.
Shit! I can’t let anyone see me like this. Matteo is expecting it, waiting, watching in the shadows for me to slip up. At the first sign of weakness, he’s going to pounce, so it’s better not to give him a reason to jump at all. Taking another calm breath, I clear my throat and then speak.
“Yes?”
The knob twists, and the door opens. Laura, one of the maids, pops her head into the room, and I almost sigh in relief. Thank god. Since my father found out about me kicking Zane to the curb, he’s been pushing Alberto and I together more.
He’s even moved the wedding date up, and since I don’t plan to marry Alberto, I’ll have to make good on the next step in my plan soon.
“Ms. Castro, I’m sorry to interrupt you, but your father wanted me to let you know that the stylist will be here soon to prepare you for the engagement dinner.”
“Oh, yes. Thank you, send them up whenever they arrive.” I give her a smile, which she returns before slipping out of the room and closing the door quietly. Given my fake breakup with Zane, my emotions have been on edge and my mind, of course, elsewhere, so much so that I nearly forgot that the engagement party was today.
Matteo invited everyone far and wide and decided that having it here at the house was the best choice. It would give everyone a chance to see how rich and powerful we were. At least, that’s what he told me. I agreed mainly because disagreeing wasn’t an option. I finally have him on my side and eating right out of the palm of my hand. He’s already been more lenient with me. Letting me walk around the house, spend the day in the library, even letting me walk outside in the garden on my own.
I won’t mess this up. I didn’t hurt Zane for nothing. I did this for him, for us. Now, I just have to figure out how to escape… the wheels in my head start turning. Tonight. I’ll make my move tonight. Matteo will be too focused on the guests to notice if I go missing, plus, with all the t
raffic in and out of this place, I’ll have enough of a distraction.
My lips turn up into a sly smile. My heart may be broken, but it won’t be forever. I’ll make this right.
* * *
Two hours of hair and makeup later, and I’m finally getting into the strapless red piece that Matteo picked out for today. It’s tight and shows off my breasts and slim waist. I can barely breathe in the damn thing. Looking in the mirror at my reflection, I’m tempted to take it off. I hate it, hate it so much because all it’s going to do is draw unwanted attention. I don’t want everyone staring at me, watching me, whispering about me as I pass by them. My snowy-white skin looks even paler, and though my hair and makeup is pure perfection, the rest of me just looks blah. Then there’s the fact that Zane isn’t here tonight. I’m lost without him, like a broken compass that doesn’t know its way.
All the thoughts swirl and weigh heavily on my shoulders. Grabbing onto the marble counter just to have something to hang onto, I count back from ten in my mind. By the time I reach zero, I’m a sliver less likely to have a full-on mental breakdown. The door to the bedroom creaks open, and I step out of the bathroom just in time to see Matteo walking into my room, his dark hair is slicked back, and the suit he wears clings to his body like a second skin. He looks every bit as evil as I know he is.
“My dear, you look so beautiful.” He reaches for my hand and brings it to his lips, pressing a kiss to the skin. I do my best not to tug from his grasp.
“Thank you, you look great as well.”
Dropping my hand, he smiles, his eyes twinkling with appreciation. “I wanted to let you know that I’m very proud of you. I didn’t think you would do it, but like always, you surprise me.”
He’s referring to my breakup with Zane. Great, now he wants to talk about it.
“It had to happen, it was him or my obligation to the family, and I wasn’t going to choose some man over you. You’re the only family I have, and the last thing I want to be is a disappointment.” I bat my eyes for effect and watch as the mask on his face melts away like a chocolate bar sitting on steaming hot pavement.
“You could never disappoint me. You have Castro blood running through your veins. It’s not in us to do such a thing.” I almost snort at his response but suppress it at the last second, and instead, cover it up with a massive smile.
“Shall we get to the party?” I ask in an overly excited tone.
“We shall.” He smiles down at me, and I try not to sink deeper into the uneasiness that’s pooling around my feet. As we descend the stairs, people cheer, and I realize then that the festivities have already started. My eyes collide with Alberto’s dark ones. He’s waiting at the end of the stairs for us. I can see the desire rolling off of him in waves.
He thinks he has a chance, a shot at being with me. He doesn’t know shit. My father passes me off to him, and I take his arm in mine, ignoring the churning in my gut that his touch brings. Matteo dismisses me and starts chatting with two men that look to be of some importance.
“You look absolutely divine,” Alberto murmurs into the shell of my ear as he guides me through the maze of people. I recognize a few faces from the previous welcome home party, but none of the names from that night stuck, so all over again, I feel lost in a sea of unknown faces. It’s even worse this time because Zane isn’t here.
My chest tightens at the thought of him, and it feels like someone is using my heart as a damn stress ball.
“Look how excited everyone is to see us together.” Alberto tightens his hold on me, almost as if he’s trying to show everyone how possessive he is. “I can’t wait to make you my wife and solidify our stronghold over the west. No one will think to try and fight us.”
I don’t dare tell him the only thing he’s going to be looking forward to is his death because then that would ruin the surprise. Smiling up at him because there are so many wandering eyes, and I need to continue to play the part, I let him walk me through the double French doors and outside. The garden has been transformed into a party area with a buffet, tables, and chairs.
The space is decorated with fresh cut roses, tea lights, and string lights that hang above the entire area. They twinkle like stars and give the place a more intimate and elegant feel. It’s beautiful, breathtaking, and I kind of hate that Matteo put something as great as this together. A man as evil as him, shouldn’t be allowed to come up with such beautiful things.
Alberto and I take our seats at the head table, a flute of wine is shoved into my hands, and I take tiny sips of it as I’m forced to endure small talk with my father’s guests.
“I can’t wait to fuck you raw,” Alberto leans over halfway through the dinner and whispers into my ear.
I feel disgust slither through me and all the way to the tips of my toes. This is the worst part of playing this game. Making those around you assume that you care and are interested.
“I can’t wait either,” I say, placing a hand on his thigh beneath the table. His eyes flash with primal hunger, and I know all I’m doing is taunting the beast inside the cage.
The night drags on and on, and after some time, Alberto disappears, maybe he’s screwing someone else, or maybe he’s talking with some of Matteo’s men. I don’t know. I should probably be worried, considering that he’s been gone awhile, and this is our engagement party, but I’m not. If anything, I’m thankful for his absence.
It’s one less person I have to pretend that I give a fuck to. Some guests linger, but many leave after dinner, which is exactly what I’m planning to do right now. If I’m going to escape, it has to be tonight. Since Matteo is busy smoking cigars and drinking bourbon with his buddies, he won’t even realize that I’ve slipped away.
I’ll never get a more perfect moment than this evening. As I glance down at my half-eaten plate of food, my eyes catch on the shiny knife blade. Weapon. You need a weapon, Dove, my brain screams. Lifting my eyes, I look around suspiciously to see if anyone is watching me before I grab the knife and tuck it blade side down into the side of my dress, beneath my armpit. No one should see it there, and I’ll be able to make it up to the room without incident.
Pushing away from the table, I meander back into the house and toward the grand staircase. My foot has just barely touched the bottom step when a hand wraps around my arm and tugs me backward. Turning to face the owner of said hand, a gasp catches in my throat.
“Where are you going, Ms. Castro?” One of Matteo’s guards asks. He’s smiling, but his smile doesn’t reach his eyes, he looks more like a tiger smiling at its prey.
“To my room. Is that okay, or would you like to interrupt my father and his colleagues to see if he would be okay with that?” I pin him with a glare, trying not to show my fear or trembling lips and tug my arm out of his grasp. His fake smile slips away, and he looks a little mortified, his cheeks turning crimson, probably because he’s never been talked to like that by a woman before.
“Go on,” he says without another word, and I force myself to walk up the steps, instead of running like I want to. With my heart racing out of my chest, I reach the top step and bound down the hall, almost falling over my own feet in the process. Reaching the door, I twist the knob and push it open. Slipping inside, I close the door, and the darkness of the room surrounds me. I sigh, but that sigh is soon swallowed by an almost scream when the bedroom light comes on, and Alberto’s hulking frame comes into view.
“Hello, my soon to be bride,” he murmurs. I swallow the fear of being alone with him down and force air into my lungs.
All you’re doing is acting… give an Oscar-worthy performance.
Crossing the space between us, I sashay my hips and smile at him while batting my eyes as if I’m interested. I don’t know the first thing about being seductive, but I’m pretty sure my attempt is working because Alberto’s smile widens as he gets up from the bed. His jacket has already been removed, the white button up shirt he’s wearing is pulled out and wrinkled. His hands move to his dress slacks, und
oing his belt, we meet in the middle of the room.
Everything about this feels wrong, but I can’t stop now.
“I came up here to tell you that I planned to fuck you tonight, but it looks like you were thinking the same thing I was.” The edge of his voice is as sharp as the knife blade I’m hiding in the side of my dress. If I can get close enough, maybe I can stab him without him ever seeing it coming.
“Of course, why don’t you help me out of my dress,” I purr and twist around, giving him my back. It’s a daring move, one that could be dangerous if I’m not careful.
“It’d be my honor,” he growls, his hot whiskey breath fans over the back of my neck, and I shiver with fear knowing that it’s all or nothing now. I’m either going to end up on my back, making the biggest mistake of my life, or with blood on my hands.
His fingers grip the tiny zipper at my side and start to tug down. At the same time, I drop the tiny little clutch I was holding in my hands to the floor as a distraction.
As I had hoped, Alberto leans down to grab it, and that’s when I make my move. Pulling out the knife, I grip the handle in my clammy hand and twist around to face him just as he’s coming to stand at his full height.
I don’t think, all I do is act as I swing the blade through the air, and diagonally across his throat. Blood sprays like a water sprinkler from his neck, and the lustful haze in his eyes slowly turns to panic. He reaches for me, but I take a step back, bumping against the edge of the bed. Dropping the knife, it lands on the floor, and a second later, so does Alberto.
Adrenaline rushes through my veins, and all I can do is stare, my hands shaking, watching as the life drains out of him.
I killed someone. Something must be wrong with me because I don’t feel anything, not a single thing. Actually, I take that back, I feel relieved, free, a bird that’s going to escape her golden cage. An idea pops into my head, and I step over his body and start to go through his pockets. Keys jingle inside his dress pants. Bingo. Fishing them out, I stare at the key fob to his car. That’s my ticket out of this place. They’ll never think twice if I drive out of here in his car.
