The Cheater's Return

by Brian McGoldrick

  Raven Goddess' grim smile becomes a bit mischievous. "We could always take their ship in the process."

  As I stare at Raven Goddess, I cannot keep the incredulous expression off my face. "Can the five of us sail a 25m long ship?"

  "It would depend on how the ship is rigged, but it might be possible. One way or another, we will need to deal with their ship, or we will never escape their clutches."

  I snort in irritation. "Let's see what we are dealing with first. Come on."

  Staying around 500m to 600m from our previous trail, I lead my group back toward the shore, where we left our boat.

  Even though it is broad daylight, I get cold chills in the base of my spine from too many of the tombs as we pass by them. Barrow Island is not a land where the dead rest quietly, but I cannot remember many places in Avalon where the dead rested quietly, either. Thinking about it, everything about this world seems strained and restless. Is it a side effect of the QCP's chains on this world? Even though the world is artificial, it was not created by the QCP, so the QCP is alien to it. The village head, whose name I never learned, in the village where Raven Goddess and I started was obviously constrained by the QCP, and he resented that constraint. How many of the restless dead in these barrows are constrained in the same way, while knowing it and hating it?

  Once the sun begins to set, shadows around the barrows begin to move and writhe in an unnatural manner.

  "We should set up camp." Raven Goddess stops and takes a sizable supply of firewood out of her inventory.

  I shake my head and open my mouth.

  Cavallo puts a hand on my arm. "Don't say anything. It's not worth it."

  Both Serena and Raven give Cavallo dirty looks.

  "What? I didn't say anything."

  "You may not have spoken, but were you thinking bad thoughts about women." Serena looks down her nose at her husband and shakes her head.

  "To know what the Insufferable Man was about to do, you must have been thinking the same thoughts. The Insufferable Man is too thickheaded to be trained." Raven Goddess shakes her head in apparent despair.

  "But you should know better husband."

  When Cavallo gives me a helpless look, I almost burst out in laughter. Seeing the nearly untouchable gangster from Yukon City's underworld getting browbeat by two women is worth its weight in gold.

  Smothering my humor, I cut out a circle of turf, roughly three meters in diameter, and build a fire in the middle. The spirit in these barrows do not like light, and the firelight is enough to keep them at bay.

  No one is really in the mood for conversation, and with exception of Serena, who has the first watch, the rest of us go to sleep early.

  Barrow Island, Toraigh

  First Month 30, 10 RC

  As we set out in the morning, the dawn sky is still grey and the world around is dim. I keep paralleling our path from a few days ago, and lack of conversation from last night continues into the day.

  In the late morning, I see sunlight glinting off something toward the southwest, on the path we used to reach the rift.

  "Down! Get under cover!"

  I find a bit of a depression in the ground and lay on my belly. With the height of the grass, it will make it nearly impossible for whoever is heading toward the rift to see us. I have no doubt they are Crusaders.

  Except for Chin-Sun, everyone immediately gets into cover.

  As soon as she sees Chin-Sun still standing, Serena kicks her legs out from under her.

  "Ow! Why did you do that!"

  Serena glares at Chin-Sun. "If you do not keep your mouth closed, I will gag you. Now, be silent!"

  "What did you see?" Raven Goddess peers through the grass intently.

  "Light reflecting off something to the southwest."

  While we watch, a group of twenty-five Crusaders, following Sister Marga, passes us by, without ever noticing us.

  After they are gone, Raven Goddess snorts in a decidedly unladylike manner and shakes her head. "The Sororitas Sanguinis are fools. The Church's Berserker squads follow military doctrine more efficiently. With the way the Barrows restrict our lines of sight, if they had scouts properly deployed on their flanks, we would have been caught."

  I chuckle nastily. "It's all the better for us, but with what we killed, they have a lot of Holy Crusaders on hand."

  Looking in the direction of our boat, Raven Goddess frowns. "Yes. Entirely too many. Their smaller classes of ships never carry that many troops. We should bear father to the north."

  Following Raven Goddess' advice, I adjust our line of travel so that we reach the shoreline about six kilometers north of our boat, which is a good thing. As we enter the open land between the last of the barrows and the cliff, we see three ships anchored off the shore to the south.

  "Well, that is certainly a problem." Raven Goddess puts on a decidedly disgruntled expression.

  Cavallo rubs his shaved head. "If we don't do something about those ships, they'll easily run down our little cutter."

  Since I really do not know much of anything about boats and ships, I will have to take Cavallo's word for it, and Raven Goddess does not voice any disagreement.

  "Why don't we just swim?"

  With varying amounts of confusion and contempt on the part of Chin-Sun, everyone looks at Serena.

  I shake my head. "I should have the best endurance here, and I don't have a hope in hell of reaching Bone Fort Island or another island where there is a long-range teleporter to the mainland."

  With a wry smile, Serena rubs her neck. "Why would we do it in our human forms?"

  I rub my own neck. "Oh. Fish are dumber than the Crusaders, barely. What would have enough mental capacity for our intelligence?"

  "A dolphin or maybe a seal."

  Raven Goddess frowns. "No, a seal would not work, but a dolphin would. They are nearly as intelligent as humans."

  "Let's travel farther north. If we try jumping in the water here, they'll see us from those ships."

  Toward late afternoon, we find another section of the cliffs that has collapsed, giving us an easy approach to the water.

  "We should camp here and take to the water, tomorrow."

  Barrow Island, Toraigh

  First Month 31, 10 RC

  Despite the sun cresting the horizon in the east, the shoreline at the base of the collapsed section of cliff is still in deep shadow.

  "Insufferable Man, turn around, close your eyes, and keep them closed, until I give you permission to open them."

  "Huh?" I stare blankly at Raven Goddess.

  "I still remember you staring at my ass while I climbed that rope ladder in the village. Do you think that I will give you the chance to stare at me naked, while I enter the water?" Whether or not she is putting on an act, Raven Goddess' glaring face and posture radiate pure hostility.

  Next to Raven Goddess, Serena gives me a similar glare, while at the same time giving me thumbs up, where Raven Goddess cannot see it. That woman has a very warped mind.

  "Fat disgusting pig."

  I look at Chin-Sun. "Don't worry. Your face is moderately pretty, but a body that resembles an adolescent boy doesn't interest me."

  "Fuck you! You fat disgusting bastard! You're so ugly, no woman in her right mind would let you touch her! Go die!"

  When I look at Serena, she shrugs. "You probably deserve it, this time."

  I look at Cavallo, but he just raises his hands in surrender and shakes his head.

  I turn my back on the three women. "Hurry up. I don't feel like standing here until that Sororitas Sanguinis cunt catches up."

  After a couple of minutes, the sounds of rustling clothing cease, and the sounds of bodies entering the water reach my ears.

  "Eh, eh, eh, eh, eh."

  After a few more minutes pass, I spin around hearing the noise from the water and see the heads of three dolphins staring at the beach from the water.

  *I did not give you permission to turn around, Insufferable Man.*

 
"Whatever. You're a dolphin."

  While three dolphins make a point of staring at me, I take off my clothes and store them into my inventory.

  *Everything is in proportion, but that muscle definition is a bit overdone. Are you planning to enter bodybuilding competitions?* In the party voice chat, Serena's voice comes across sounding almost like droll mockery.

  Ignoring Serena's banter, I enter the water. We are far enough south that the water is freezing cold. It cannot be more than 5°C or 10°C. I cannot keep from shivering as the water rises over my waist.

  After taking a good look at the three dolphins, I focus on an image of a dolphin and activate the Torc of Fintan.

  It only sucks about a third of my Mana, this time, and my body shifts into the shape of a dolphin that is nearly three times the length of the ones the women turned into.

  Raven Goddess' laughter comes through the party chat. *You are rather large for only being a Half-Giant dolphin.*

  Standing waist deep in the water, Cavallo has his eyes closed, and abruptly his body stretches and flows into a new shape.

  *This is amazing!* The delighted amusement in Cavallo's voice is impossible to miss.

  *Let us go. What took two days in the cutter, we should be able to do in less than half the time.*

  Moving together, like a pod of real dolphins, we swim toward the west.

  Bounty Targets

  Bone Fort Island, Toraigh

  First Month 32, 10 RC

  When we approach the shore, Raven Goddess leads the women toward a small cove. Her voice has a crisp, almost prudish tone to it. *You can go to the north or south. The cove is strictly women's territory.*

  Before this, I have never been in a situation to notice, but it is slightly amusing to see that Raven Goddess is either somewhat of a prude or a bit shy.

  Shifting back into my real body from a dolphin is easier than it was to do so from a ghoul. It takes more of my available Mana than it did to shift into a dolphin, but my total Mana as a dolphin is less than as a Half-Giant. It appears that more than just the difficulty of shifting into a form is affected by the form you take. If the form taken on does not have enough Mana to shift back, it could be a problem.

  In the Torc of Fintan's description, there is no rule that says you have to return to your original form before shifting to another new form. It might be possible to use intermediary forms that require a smaller amount of Mana to shift into, but it might not. I am going to have to do some experimentation with the limitations on the Torque's shapeshifting.

  As I put on my clothes, I find it hard to keep from frowning. I have not found a single piece of equipment meant for a Half-Giant. Well, I found the broken war scythe, but that is broken. I may really need to become a blacksmith to gear myself.

  Crafting Professions are not in the same category as Classes. You develop them separately from a Class. Anyone can learn them, but there are Classes that are specifically meant to support Crafting Professions. The players generally refer to them as Crafting Classes, but the QCP categorizes them as Specialist Classes.

  Someone with such a Crafting Class will always have an advantage over others, when it comes to learning a Crafting Profession. Goibniu said that the Earth Power of Crom Cruach would help me to master his Divine Smithing . Does that mean that Earth Master has at least some of the support capabilities of a Class meant for Crafting? Will it fill the role of a Crafting Class?

  "What are you pondering with that thunderous frown?" Raven Goddess' voice holds a hint of amusement.

  "Huh?" I shake of my preoccupation and look around. I never noticed Raven Goddess' approach. If she were an enemy, would I have noticed her? I am not sure. I think my Danger Sense would have gone off, but I cannot be certain. I do not normally get so caught up in my musings that I lose track of my environment. Am I getting fatigued? Already?

  "Nothing important. Is there any place else you want to visit before we head to the mainland?"

  Raven Goddess shakes her head. "There are some interesting locations hidden among these islands, but they contain nothing of use to us, at the moment."

  "Let's head back to Bone Fort. We're past the point where the yard trash here is worth hunting. We need better hunting grounds."

  No one demurs, and we head toward the fort. Even though the yard trash is not particularly worth hunting, we still kill everything in our path. Maybe, we are technically re-killing it. The only things that do not run are all undead, after all.

  * * * * *

  As we near Bone Fort, we start to see other players. They are all in pairs, at the very least, and we see a couple groups or ten. Ten is the largest group that is efficient for hunting. After a lot of experimentation, centuries ago, players determined that from one to ten people monsters always gave the same XP per person. It is one piece of information that the Church actually confirms as being accurate.

  Upon seeing us, the players point and whisper amongst themselves, and as we pass by the larger groups, I get a faintly chilly feeling at the base of my spine.

  "Do you feel like we are getting way too much attention from the players around here?" Cavallo has his usual stony expression on, but his voice betrays a hint of confusion.

  "They're hostile, but I do not think they will do anything. I'm not getting a strong enough impression of danger from them."

  Both Cavallo and Serena give me inquisitive looks, but they do not ask any questions. I have not told them about my Danger Sense , but they might have noticed. In the future, I will have to be careful how I word things. I do not want to slip up and give away the existence of an ability like Danger Sense to the wrong people.

  "We are being followed." Raven Goddess words are softly spoken.

  "I see them."

  A group of seven players, which we passed a few minutes ago, is moving on a parallel track to ours. All seven are male, and despite looking like a bunch of pretty boys, they give me the impression of predatory weasels.

  "Do we deal with them, now?" Even though his face is as expressionless as normal, Cavallo has a predatory glint in his eyes that makes the seven look like amateur pikers.

  I sigh. "To kill or not to kill, that is always the question."

  Cavallo scoffs. "We're not in War Mode, yet, and we're not on Earth. The most we will be doing is to send them back to their spawn points."

  "I know. It's a real shame."

  Just barely in the periphery of my vision, I can see Chin-Sun. From her expression, she cannot seem to decide whether or not we are serious, but at least, she is not running her mouth. She has never lived on the streets. She has never had to fight for her life. Despite her opinions, she is nothing more than a sheltered little princess. I doubt it has registered on her that this game is not a game. Once War Mode is activated, we will be fighting for our lives.

  Stopping, I turn to face the seven weasels. If they continue to follow us, I will kill them.

  As they meet my cold stare, the seven freeze, and the very faint coolness in my stomach fades into warmth. They are nothing but cowards. They are the type of people that do not dare to face others and fight head to head, they only attack from ambush or with overwhelming numbers. There are too many like them in Primacy Online . There are too many like them on Earth.

  Turning my back on them, I continue toward Bone Fort. It only takes me a few steps to catch up with the rest of my group.

  Cavallo shakes his head. "No balls. Once the war starts for real, they should come to a bad end."

  The players that we pass keep showing too much interest in us.

  Serena looks up at me. "I know you stand out like a tree on the plains, by why is everyone so interested in us?"

  I shrug. "Not a clue. Something must be up, but I have no idea what it would be."

  "Stop! Connect to the quantum data net and look at the news sites." The look of blatant shock on Raven Goddess' face is at odds with the imperious tone in her voice.

  Driven by curiosity, I follow Raven Goddess' command.

/>   The headlines on all the top news sites are some variation on, 'Church of the Resurrection Offers Bounty for the Killing of Players'.

  When you connect to the quantum data net from inside Primacy Online , what you are looking at is invisible to anyone else. I do not know if the QCP projects the information into your mind, directly onto your retina or does something else entirely, but the end result is that you are the only one that can view the contents of your connection. If you want someone else to see it, you need to use an item or spell that can convert what you see into an illusion or hologram.

  As I pull up one of the links, a video starts playing. The video shows some blonde new bimbo. I do not recognize her or the name of her network, but her bust size is probably larger than her IQ.

  "Regarding Primacy Online , we have the most shocking story, ever. For the first time in history, the Church of the Resurrection has placed a bounty on players, during a World War. The Holy Church's spokesman, Archbishop Manchin has announced that Raven Goddess, Morgan Danan, the Speaker or Mann, has engaged in blatant cheating. She has led her current group into using an exploit to access a forbidden zone in Primacy Online , and may have acquired resources that could break the current balance of the game." Either, the shock and horror on the face of the blonde bimbo are a testament to her acting skills, or she really is shocked and horrified. If it were not for the completely vacuous lack of comprehension in her eyes, she would be perfect.

  The brunette sitting next to her, who might have an IQ equal to her bust size, glares into the camera. Her face is the perfect portrait of righteous indignation and anger, and the emotion seems to be reflected in her eyes. "This is unbelievable, Pamela. The state of peace on Earth is dependent on the World Wars in Primacy Online. To think that the de facto dictator of a city-state would engage in such conduct! This is beyond belief!"

  Her face shifting into an expression of the same righteous indignation and anger as the brunette, Pamela, the blonde, holds her clenched fists in front of her chest. "Is that madwoman trying to bring an end to world peace?"

  The brunette makes a mollifying gesture toward Pamela. "We don't have all the facts, Pamela. We can't jump to conclusions, like this. We're reporters."