The Case of the Quizzical Queens Beagle

by B R Snow

  “Why does she want to do that? I love her risotto and polenta.”

  “She says they’re not authentic enough,” Josie said, shrugging. “And while we’re there, she wants to visit some cheesemakers. She says she needs to learn how to make her own Gorgonzola.”

  I laughed as we continued to walk toward the cage area.

  “Then we’re going to do some winery tours as we make our way south,” Josie said, sounding more excited by the minute. “Chef Claire wants to head to Tuscany from there to study breadmaking. Then it’s on to Naples.”

  “That’s where pizza was invented, right?”

  “It is,” Josie said. “And Chef Claire has found some famous pizza chef who’s willing to spend a few days working with her.”

  Josie noticed the look on my face and stopped walking. I also came to a stop and stared back at her.

  “Are you okay?” she said.

  “I’m just going to miss you guys, that’s all,” I said.

  “I’m sure you and Max will be just fine. And we’re only going to be gone for a month at a time.”

  “For now,” I whispered.

  “Suzy, I’m never leaving this place,” Josie said. “You do know that, don’t you?”

  “Yeah, I guess I do,” I said, nodding. “But we can’t say the same thing about Chef Claire.”

  “No, we can’t. Look, you need to remember that Chef Claire is different from us. She’s like…an eagle.”

  “An eagle?” I said, frowning.

  “Yes, she’s built to soar,” Josie said. “And explore.”

  “Now you’re saying she’s somehow confined? Maybe even trapped living here?”

  “Don’t pout,” Josie snapped. “I’m not saying anything like that. But Chef Claire is in a different place than we are at the moment. When you boil it all down, we’re basically a couple of nesters. But she’s an explorer who needs to see a lot of places and have as many adventures as she can before she finally decides to slow down and maybe kick back a bit.”

  “I’m being selfish again, aren’t I?”

  “Yeah, but we forgive you,” she said, gently punching me on the shoulder. “Just let her do her thing. In a few years, she’ll either put permanent roots down here, or she’ll decide to go big and probably end up being a major star with her own show and her name on a line of cookware.”

  “There’s no reason she can’t do that from here,” I said.

  “No, there probably isn’t,” Josie said. “But she’s not convinced of that yet. So, just sit back and enjoy watching what she does. It’s gonna be one heck of a ride.”

  “Okay,” I said as I began walking. “I’ll do my best. What’s that thing you always say about choices?”

  “The reason so many people have a hard time saying yes is that they know that as soon as they do, they’ll be saying no to a whole bunch of other options.”

  “That’s the one,” I said. “I never actually paid close attention to what it really means.”

  “Geez, thanks,” she deadpanned.

  “You know what I mean. But now I get it.”

  “Because you’ve said yes to Max and motherhood, right?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Any regrets?”

  “Not a one,” I said, grinning at her.

  “I’m glad to hear that,” Josie said. “Because your mother would have a stroke if you started having second thoughts now.”

  “Oh, that reminds me,” I said. “She said last night that we only have one more thing to decide.”

  Josie stared off, deep in thought.

  “I can’t imagine what it could be,” she said. “She’s got the whole week planned out down to the minute.”

  “Think it through,” I said, cocking my head at her.

  “Okay,” Josie said, then frowned. “Oh, no. Really?”

  “Yeah. The wedding dress and bridesmaids’ gowns.”

  “Let me guess, she’s scheduled a fitting for all of us,” Josie said.

  “Fittings,” I said. “Starting next Monday.”

  “We should have gone with your idea of just getting married out on the River,” Josie said.

  “Bathing suits and a keg is starting to sound pretty good, huh?”

  “What are you gonna do? At least, it’s keeping her young,” Josie said.

  “She doesn’t need any help,” I said. “So, you’re really going to go to cooking school?”

  “I am. I’m looking forward to it.”

  “Make sure you show the teacher how you slice garlic with your scalpel,” I said, laughing.

  “Yeah, Chef Claire said the same thing.”

  “All this talk about what you’re going to be doing in Italy is making me hungry.”

  Josie came to a sudden stop and nodded at me.

  “I could eat.”

  Chapter 22

  After a lengthy fridge-raid, Josie and I headed back down to the Inn and spent half an hour saying hello to all the dogs that were outside in the play area enjoying the warm weather. Today’s count, not including our four house dogs, was up to eighty-one, and I put my hands on my hips as I looked around at our collection of residents that came in all shapes, sizes, and breeds.

  “Are you thinking what I’m thinking?” Josie said.

  “That it’s time we had a weekend adoption event?” I said.

  “Yeah, we haven’t had one in a couple of months,” I said, nodding for her to follow me back inside. “What time are Sammy and Jill starting today?”

  “I think they’re working the afternoon shift,” Josie said. “They said something about taking the boat out this morning.”

  “I have some good news for them,” I said, holding the back door open for her.

  We headed into the registration area and spent a few minutes chatting with a couple of friends who had brought their lab in for his annual checkup. Josie headed off with the dog, and a few minutes later, Sammy and Jill arrived with Tripod, their three-legged spaniel, leading the way. Queen B. was nestled in Jill’s arms, and she set the dog down on top of the counter. The beagle cocked her head at me as I walked over to the counter and began scratching her ears.

  “You don’t miss a trick, do you?” I said, laughing at the quizzical look the dog was giving me.

  “Do you have any news yet?” Jill said, her voice a combination of anticipation and nervous energy.

  “Actually, I do,” I said. “I’ve spoken with everyone who might have an interest in taking her.”

  “And?” Jill said, her voice going up about an octave.

  “And I’m really sorry, Jill,” I deadpanned, pausing for effect then grinning at her crestfallen expression. “But you and Sammy are just going to have to take her.”

  “You’re so mean,” she said, playfully swatting my hand. “Really?”

  “Yeah, she’s all yours.”

  “Oh, that’s great,” Jill said, hugging the beagle. “Thank you so much.”

  “No, thank you,” I said. “And Josie and I were talking about doing a weekend adoption event. Could you and Sammy check the calendar and see if we might be able to pull one together before the end of the month?”

  “I think we can make that work,” Jill said, laughing as she accepted the beagle’s licks and kisses.

  “She’s a happy girl,” I said, then grabbed my car keys. “Look, I need to run out for a while. Our sales rep is supposed to drop by later this afternoon. I left the food and supply order on my desk.”

  “I’ll make sure he gets it,” she said. “Where are you going?”

  “I thought I’d run off and join the circus,” I said, waving over my shoulder as I headed out the front door.

  I made the short drive and parked on the street in front of the temporary marquee. I headed down the path and walked into the main tent. It looked a lot different in the daytime than it did when lit at night, and I noticed several performers scattered around chatting and practicing their routines. Far above the ground, I watched Wanda and Miguel working on what
appeared to be a new routine and again marveled at the speed and strength required to pull off what they were diligently trying to perfect.

  On my way into the area behind the main tent, Iggy the Magnificent headed in my direction lugging two large suitcases. The magician was obviously mad, and he got even angrier when one of the heavy cases banged hard off one of his knees. He dropped both suitcases and began rubbing the knee with both hands as he cursed up a storm.

  “That’s gotta hurt,” I said.

  “Good call, Captain Obvious,” he said, glaring at me.

  “There’s no need to get snarky,” I said. “Running off to join normal society?”

  “What?” he said, pausing to glance up from his work on the knee.

  “Where are you going?”

  “He fired me,” the magician said. “After one performance. Can you believe that?”

  I decided to keep my opinion about his question to myself.

  “Family, huh?”

  “What?” he said, confused.

  “Nothing,” I said. “I guess it’s not the best venue for a magician, right?”

  “No, it’s not that,” Iggy said as he continued to massage his knee. “The old man refused to pay me for last night’s show. He said I ran short.”

  “And then he fired you?”

  “No, he fired me right after I called him a bottom feeding parasite,” Iggy said.

  “Yeah, that would probably do the trick,” I said, shrugging. “What are you going to do now?”

  “Probably go back to where he found me,” Iggy said.

  “Where did he find you?”

  “I was a street performer in Cornwall,” he said, grabbing his suitcases.

  “Cornwall?” I said, trying to recall the touring schedule. “That’s right. The circus was up there just before they came here. Pontilly saw you perform and offered you a job?”

  “Pretty much,” he said. “But getting fired is the best thing that could have happened. The guy’s a total control freak.”

  Not waiting for a response, he headed across the tent to the main entrance then disappeared from sight. I flinched when I heard a soft thump a few feet away. I turned around and saw Wanda grinning at me as she bounced a few times in the netting and came to a stop.

  “Oops,” she said, laughing. “Missed it again.”

  “Nice of you to drop in,” I said. “What on earth is that new trick you’re working on?”

  “It’s a triple with a little twist,” she said. “It’s hard to explain. What brings you by?”

  “I need to have a little chat with Mr. Pontilly,” I said.

  She frowned but said nothing.

  “What’s the matter?” I said.

  “Just try to go easy with him,” she said, heading for the ladder that would take her back to the top of the platform. “He’s in a really bad mood today.”

  “I’ll do that,” I said. “Say, when are you guys taking off for Vegas?”

  “Very soon,” she said, stopping to turn around. “Are you coming to tonight’s show?”

  “I wouldn’t miss it.”

  “Then you’ll be able to tell people you saw our final performance with the world famous Pontilly Family Circus,” she said as she climbed the ladder two rungs at a time.

  I headed through the curtains and glanced around the empty space. Then I heard loud voices coming from the wardrobe room. I hung back and listened, trying to decide if I should interrupt.

  “You need to relax, Mr. Pontilly.”

  It took me a second, but I eventually put a name to the voice. Chuckles. Then the other clown, Bubs, chimed in.

  “Yeah, Mr. Pontilly. You’ll come up with something. You always do.”

  “You two are no help,” Pontilly said. “And it’s not like anybody is handing over thirty bucks to watch you.”

  “With all due respect, Mr. Pontilly,” Chuckles said. “That’s not very nice.”

  “Yeah, Chuckles and I work our butts off for you,” Bubs said. “And when was the last time we didn’t do everything we could to help you out?”

  “I’m sorry to take it out on you two,” Pontilly said. “But this thing is falling down around my ears. Maybe I should just get out now.”

  “You can’t do that,” Chuckles said with a touch of panic in his voice.

  “Yeah, what would happen to all of us?” Bubs said. “We’re family.”

  The old man let loose with a bitter cackle.

  “It’ll turn around,” Chuckles said.

  “With what?” Pontilly said, then began a hacking cough that lasted a long time. “Wanda and Miguel are out of here tomorrow.”

  “We still have time to help them change their mind,” Bubs said in a guttural voice that made the hairs on the back of my neck stand up.

  “No, that’s not an option,” Pontilly said.

  “We should have been working on them earlier,” Bubs said. “And been more persuasive.”

  “It’s too bad Sammy went off the boat,” Chuckles said. “She probably could have convinced Miguel to stick around.”

  “Don’t remind me,” Pontilly said. “By the way, have you seen Grundella today?”

  “I think she’s still sleeping it off,” Chuckles said. “You need to get her under control, Mr. Pontilly. At this rate, she’s not gonna last long.”

  “A third-rate dog act led by a drunk and an animal tamer who won’t get out of bed,” Pontilly said. “What a lineup.”

  Deciding I had eavesdropped long enough, I tapped on a metal pole outside the entrance to the wardrobe room and poked my head in. All three of them turned to look at me.

  “Good afternoon,” I chirped. “Sorry to pop in unannounced.”

  “Hello, Ms. Chandler,” Pontilly said. “Come on in. These two were just leaving.”

  “How are you doing?” I said to both clowns as they left. They managed grunts and small waves as they passed. I sat down in the chair the old man was pointing at. “Good show last night.”

  “You really think so?” he said, frowning at me.

  “Well, I loved the trapeze artists. And the elephant act certainly ended with a bang,” I said, then couldn’t resist taking a gentle jab. “The magician, not so much.”

  “Yeah, sorry about that,” he said, shaking his head. “I should have known better. But I was desperate.”

  “You gotta fill a couple of hours, right?”

  “Indeed,” he said. “How can I help you?”

  Okay, Suzy. Showtime.

  “Well, I was wondering if you could help me,” I said, starting slowly. “I thought I should check with you before you left town. I’m trying to find out if there’s someone who might want to take Samantha’s dog if she does happen to turn up.”

  “I seriously doubt if that’s going to happen,” he said.

  “Yeah, probably not. But you never know. Dogs have an amazing way of surviving and showing up when you least expect it.”

  “Okay,” he said, giving me a puzzled frown. “Why do you want my help? Based on what I’ve heard, isn’t that your job?”

  “Fair point,” I said, nodding.

  Score one for the old man.

  “Oh, I’m sure we’d be able to find a good home for the dog, but I always like to make sure there isn’t a family member or friend available before we do that.”

  It was far from my best effort, but I thought it was strong enough to hold up.

  “Well, unless you’ve managed to locate her family, I don’t think that’s going to be an option,” he said.

  “Sure, sure.”

  “And as far as friends go, all of Sammy’s are here with the circus. And unless one of them has already raised their hand offering to take the dog, I think we can also rule that out.”

  “What about friends from the old days?”

  “Old days? I’m sorry, I’m not following you.”

  “You know, back when you first found her on the street,” I said, tossing my line into the water.

  “I see you’v
e been talking to some of my people,” he said, staring at me.

  “Not really,” I said, shrugging. “It’s just that I heard you sometimes find people to work for you who are, shall we say, momentarily down on their luck.”

  “What about it?” he said, officially on the defensive.

  “Well, I was just wondering if there was anybody she was close to in the old days who might want the dog as a reminder. You know, to take the dog as a tribute to Samantha’s memory.”

  “I would imagine that the people she was hanging around with back then are all either dead or in prison,” Pontilly said without emotion.

  “So, she was actually living on the street when you found her?”

  “Basically, yes,” he said.

  “How did you recruit her?” I said, going for casual. “I mean, it’s not every day that somebody comes up to you on the street and asks if you want to join the circus.”

  “Claude is not without his charms,” Pontilly said with a grin.

  “You have him pimping for you?” I blurted, momentarily caught off guard by his comment.

  “Strong word,” he said, frowning. “I prefer the term recruiting.”

  “And after he brings people here, you work your magic to close the deal?”

  “You make it sound unsavory,” he said, leaning back in his chair. “But trust me, what I offer them is a way out. And while circus life can be hard, it’s certainly a better option than what most of them have to look forward to.”

  “After they start working for you, you train them?”

  “We do,” Pontilly said. “With practice, most people can learn enough to be part of the show. You’ve seen our jugglers and unicyclists.”

  “I have,” I said, nodding. “They’re good.”

  “Thank you. To a person, they were all recruited the same way,” he said, draping a leg over his knee. “Even the ones who can’t develop performance skills are still valuable workers behind the scenes. There are countless tasks that need to be done to keep a circus running.”

  “Yeah, I get that,” I said, then an idea floated to the surface. “You used Samantha to recruit as well, didn’t you?”

  “Yes,” he whispered. “From time to time.”

  “Because she, like Claude, also had her charms?” I said, frowning as I cocked my head at him.