That sounds really interesting.
Fash: Yes, it isn’t just interesting. I need you to tell me about the connection between you and Worry.
P: Hmmm… By the way, I’ve got no business with Worry or any of his friends; he isn’t in any way a colleague neither is he my mate.
Fash: Wait, wait. Worry said, when you slack, he steps in. So, isn’t he your helpmeet?
P: Smiles, I spoke about my colleagues the first time I met you, but not my mates.
The issue about mates is one big challenge with you human being. Let me quickly rush over into your archive and write out your stand about “mates”.
Fash, read below what you said;
Am I your mate? Angry, that is the question one of my teachers asked my class a decade ago.
Am I your mate? Fuming, this is the question a neighbour loudly asked his wife a few months ago.
Am I your mate? Annoyed, the referee echoed it in the ears of the disrespectful football players.
Am I your mate? Furious, the colleague questioned the authoritative statement of her line manager.
What does this phrase “Am I Your Mate” mean to you? “
What this question means at different situations differs. The reason why people ask this question differs.
Everyone likes to be respected and held in high esteem. It is a worthy and lofty desire.
Any time we don’t get the respect we desire, our haughty reactions gently kick in.
There must be some advantages to being born earlier than others; age is very precious to many people and in several cultures.
Being the boss or CEO comes with some clout. Your employees ought to respect you. You aren’t their mate…Ahahah…
The Government has authority and if you disrespect her, you will live to share the ugly tale in a dark room.
Okay, we have class mates, office mates, bed mates, age mates and so on. The definitions aren’t all encompassing.
For example, class mates may not be age mates, bed mates may not be class mates.
The most important thing is that there is a level at which all of us connect. We must nurture that parallel.
So, who are your mates? Are they your colleagues at work? After all, you spend 8+ hours together daily.
Who are your mates? Are they your allies in the brotherhood?
Who are your mates? Are they the folks in your circle of influence or friends in church groups?
Who are your mates? Perhaps, someone you can bare your heart out to?
The struggle to define this appropriately has led to successful suicide missions. It has wrecked homes; it has helped unbearable friction to creep into great organizations.
Technically, nobody is your mate. Yeah. We all have just 1 mate. That person is YOU. That mate was born on the same day, hour and second as you and has the same capacity, gift and skills.
Your mate has the same experience as you, eats the same meal and has the same voice and heart. The only mate you have has the same eyeballs and DNA, the same thought patterns with identical blood vessels.
The day you understand this, you will enter into the limelight of achieving great strides. Rather than struggle to outshine a colleague, you will understand how beautiful winning together can be.
Have you heard of OPPOSITION parties in political discussions? They aren’t mates, right?
Have you heard of COMPETITORS in business circles? They talk each other down to look good before clients.
The way Jake Chukwu puts it in his piece “My People”…you can blame another tribe for your downfall, be foolish or you can suck it up and improve on yourself, be better!
…and I am not your problem, you are who you are and I am who I am.
Friends, in the true sense of it, you are in competition with no man. Live out your UNIQUENESS.
Who Are Your Mates? Only YOU!
Fash: Yes, I wrote that. So what does this have to do with you and Worry?
P: A lot.
Fash: Please, show me the connection.
P: I can never worry about Worry or all the things he’s got in store for you and your friends, I concentrate on my role in your life. We aren’t mates!
The simplest definition about me is
“I am a solemn request for help or an expression of thanks to God or another deity.” Another one is that, “I am an earnest hope or desire for something to happen.”
I have never forced myself on anyone and will never. After all, I am too important to be ignored. As far as you say a wish, think or articulate your desires, you are right in my home. I am nobody’s mate and nobody is my mate. I stick to my uniqueness and nurture it among everyone that befriends me.
I am actually an active part of every man’s daily experience. From desiring to wake up and find piles of dollars at your doors to getting up and desiring to win the heart of the hiring manager, you befriend me and these lists go on and on till the end of every day.
Fash: Ah, Worry told me that a lot of people dine with him daily. I am thrown out of my shoes to realize that you are also an active part of my daily activities.
Actually, I was taught how to pray when I was young, but nobody taught me about how to get along with Worry. Is it that you are so difficult to master?
P: See, you weren’t taught how to pray, you were taught how to religiously connect with God and man.
You were taught the words to say, the posture to maintain and the time to do it – during your meals, when you wake up, when you’re off to sleep and so on. The missing link is that I am available to dine every second of everyday forever. You can use me (yes, use me) to connect with God or with man anytime.
Did they teach you the wrong thing? No, they gave you only sugar out of all the ingredients you need to make a 7-step conjugal cake.
Fash: Hmmm… I have to think about that last sentence for a few minutes.
Please, I need to ask you another question. But, I am sorry; I need to talk about Worry in my question.
P: It’s okay, go ahead.
Fash: Thank you.
The truth is, I know Worry is good. We’ve had some awesome times together. He has kicked my butt out of bed several times, he has helped me to meet deadlines and he has helped me to extra-prepare for presentations.
I also feel that Worry has helped me many time to practically run to you. Don’t you feel Worry is as important as you are?
P: Fash, let us be very clear at this juncture.
Your comparison game is way too shaky; I guess you need more time to construct it correctly. This isn’t about who is more important or who is of less value.
Many of your friends have used me several times to report what Worry has done and is doing to them.
I like your claims of how Worry kicks your butt to action and how it helps you to reach the lines of death (dead-lines) smartly. The only thing you missed out is that no matter how much Worry kicks your butt, if there is no sense of responsibility on your part, you will always be on the wrong end of the fire.
Fash: I didn’t quite get that last sentence. Expand on that a little more.
P: Do you know why people commit suicide? There are many reasons. One of the reasons is the feeling of hopelessness. A man looks around, thinks about all his problems, all the mosquitoes stinging at night and singing with cracked voices, how miserable his life is and all the pain and grief. Then Worry crawls in, He silently kicks his butt again and the man automatically believes that he is powerless. The only power he believes he has is the power to terminate his own life and then he does it – Suicide!
I wrote a note to professional procrastinators about their friendship with Worry:
Dear Professional Procrastinator,
I know you Worry a lot about all the wrong things.
I know how many times you stopped the alarm this morning.
I know how heavy your legs are to take the first step out of bed.
I know how bad you feel when the first ray of sunshine alters your sleep.
I
know how angry you are when friends tap your hands and ears to kick start your day.
I know the report is long and tiring, you can do it next month.
I know how afraid you are to ask for help now until your world's biggest problems crash in on you.
I know how difficult it is to reach out to your friends and family once a month.
I know how painful it is to read up late to clear your messy desk.
I know you have a lot of catalytic ideas; but you'll not start any until you are 80 years old.
I know you intend to write a book, you'll never write the first paragraph. Mtchew... Ahaha
I know you'll like your products to go viral, but marketing education isn't for now.
I know you want a 'beautiful' wife, but polishing your inner and outer beauty starts in 6 years' time.
I know you love him, but to tell him is the biggest struggle. You'll never do it afraid until you lose him. Hohohoho…
I know you want to visit, but until your friend's grandma dies, you wouldn't.
I know how much you care, but you can postpone sending the gifts and love letters.
I know you are a professional, that's why you Worry and procrastinate professionally. It isn't your fault, you are a professional.
Dear professional procrastinator, I know you're limitless. Yeah!
Fash, I want you to know that, it is your sense of responsibility, commitment, accountability, usefulness, mission and vision that get you out of bed every morning. All these are the ingredients that drive you to get things to work, to plan, to strategize, to connect with people, to smile, to eat, to stay alive and to want an awesome today with a beautiful tomorrow.
One of the simple definitions of Worry is;
“…the thoughts, images and emotions of a negative nature in which mental attempts are made to avoid
Streak: Why Pray When You Can Easily Worry Page 3
