Brighid's Quest

by P. C. Cast

  “Mud and anger, huh? That doesn’t surprise me. I don’t particularly like boars,” Elphame said.

  Lochlan’s arm went around her waist, and she automatically leaned into her mate. “I’m rather fond of them. Isn’t that true, my heart?” He and Elphame shared an intimate look, remembering that it was the attack of a wild boar that had brought them together for the first time.

  “Well, I am fond of eating them,” Danann said. The old centaur moved to clasp Brighid’s forearm warmly. “Well met, Huntress. I missed greeting you last night.”

  “Well met, Stonemaster.” Brighid gestured to the grounds before them, filled with Clan members and New Fomorians, all busily erecting tents. “In this horde, it’s easy to miss one another.” She drew in a fortifying breath and finally allowed herself to look directly at Cu. She’d opened her mouth to wish him a friendly good morning, but the sight of him made her words catch in her throat.

  He was so different from the Cuchulainn who had stumbled from her room the night before that the nonchalant greeting she had prepared vanished from her mind. Goddess! He looked vibrant and powerful—like the warrior he had been; only now the boyishness that had always seemed such a part of him had been forged into the maturity of a man. Where was the grief-stricken, broken Cuchulainn she had traveled with and shared quarters with in the Wastelands? Like her flippant greeting, he too had vanished. In his place was a warrior whose hair was washed and neatly cut short. The reddish beard that had covered his face was gone. The lines that had formed at the corners of his eyes were still there, but he had lost that weary, dark-shadowed look. And he was watching her carefully, with those knowing turquoise eyes and lips that were just beginning to tilt up.

  “You’re looking at me as if you don’t recognize me. I didn’t look that bad before, did I?”

  Her first coherent thought was that he didn’t seem nervous to be around her at all. His deep voice was full of good humor, and his smile looked mischievous.

  Elphame answered while Brighid was still trying to find her voice. “Brighid’s obviously being polite, so I’ll say it. Yes—” she punched her brother’s arm playfully “—you did look that bad.”

  “Well, I like your hair short,” Liam chimed in from her back. “I like Brighid’s long, and yours short. Of course Brighid’s is prettier, though.”

  Cuchulainn laughed heartily and strode over to sweep the boy from the centaur’s back. “I’ll tell you a secret.” Plopping Liam down on the ground near Brighid, he bent and, with an exaggerated whisper said, “I like her hair long and I think it’s prettier than mine, too.” Then his eyes met hers with a heat and intensity that was in direct contradiction to the light tone of his words.

  Brighid felt like someone had knocked all of the air from her lungs.

  “Oh, Cu.” Elphame rolled her eyes at her brother. “You are incorrigible.” But the happiness on his sister’s face clearly showed how pleased she was that once again she had reason to banter playfully with her favorite brother. “Come on, Brighid, let’s leave these males, and I’ll catch you up on what we’ve decided for the New Fomorian village.”

  “But Brighid has to teach me about tracks,” Liam said.

  “Your first lesson is this one,” Brighid said firmly. “When your Chieftain asks you to accompany her, you change your plans and obey.” The boy instantly looked chagrined, and the Huntress had to stop herself from reaching out to run a consoling hand through his fluffy hair. She couldn’t expect him to grow if she coddled him, and he needed to understand that Elphame’s word was MacCallan law. “The second lesson is one that you must learn on your own. Take the hoof and go over to the tree line. Brush aside the pine needles until the soft earth of the forest is exposed, then press it firmly into the ground. Learn its shape. Touch the indentation it makes. Memorize everything about it. I’m counting on you to help me track the next boar.”

  Liam’s face instantly brightened. “I won’t let you down!” And off he went, scampering across the grassy plateau toward the line of pine trees.

  “He’s healing quickly,” Cuchulainn said.

  “Yes, he’s a strong boy,” she answered without looking at Cu.

  “Riding on your back he looked happier than I’ve ever seen him,” Lochlan told her.

  Brighid’s gaze shifted to the winged man. “I should have waited to ask your permission to accept him as my apprentice. Forgive me for overstepping.”

  Lochlan’s smile was warm. “Huntress, I believe now is the perfect time for many of the old traditions to be overstepped. But if you need my permission, know that I grant it to you readily. With or without my blessing, the boy obviously belongs to you.”

  “I couldn’t agree more, Lochlan. It’s time we make traditions of our own,” Cuchulainn said, still gazing steadily at the Huntress.

  “Good,” Elphame said with satisfaction. “Then you won’t mind explaining to Lochlan and Danann the ideas you and I discussed earlier for where the longhouse and cottages should be built.” Without waiting for her brother’s reply, she linked her arm familiarly through Brighid’s and guided the Huntress away from them.

  Brighid could still feel Cuchulainn’s eyes on her.

  The women walked together, staying to the seaward side of the busy plateau. It was only when they were well out of the group’s hearing range that Elphame spoke.

  “How will I ever be able to thank you for healing Cuchulainn?”

  “You owe me no thanks,” Brighid said quickly. “I’m just relieved that it worked. Last night he still seemed…” She hesitated, struggling to choose the right thing to say. “He still seemed shaken. He may not seem quite himself for some time to come,” she explained carefully, hoping to give Elphame a rational reason for Cuchulainn’s lingering looks.

  Elphame gave her a fast hug. “I’ll take him just as he is. Of course he’s still missing Brenna. He probably always will, but he’s ready to move forward now. He’s whole again. You’ve returned my brother to me. If there is anything I can ever do for you, know all you need do is ask, my sister.”

  “I might need to ask that you allow me to return to Guardian Castle—temporarily, of course.”

  Elphame’s brows pulled together. “I don’t understand. You just got home. How can you want to leave again so soon?”

  “It’s not that I want to leave,” Brighid explained as they resumed their walk around the plateau. “It’s just that Guardian Castle’s Huntress returned to the Centaur Plains suddenly, without appointing a replacement. I couldn’t help but notice that their need for a Huntress was great. I thought I might, perhaps, give them aid. With your permission,” she added.

  For a moment Elphame didn’t speak. She just studied her friend. Then she looked over Brighid’s shoulder at Cu. Brighid turned and saw his strong body silhouetted against the clear spring sky. He was turned in her direction, just standing. And staring.

  “Harrumph,” Elphame said, abruptly taking her friend’s arm again and continuing their walk.

  “So,” Brighid continued, trying to hide her discomfort. “If I need to leave, temporarily, would I have your permission?”

  “Are you running away?” Elphame asked.

  Brighid began the denial, and then closed her mouth. She looked her friend in the eye. She didn’t want to lie to her Chieftain, and she realized that she couldn’t lie to her friend. “Yes. I think I might be.”

  Elphame’s brow wrinkled. “I want to ask you something, but I need you to know that you may answer me honestly without jeopardizing our relationship. You have my word as your friend, as well as your Chieftain, on that.”

  Stomach clenching, Brighid nodded.

  “Does the fact that Cuchulainn desires you repulse you?” When Brighid drew in a shocked breath, Elphame hurried on. “I mean, it would be understandable if it made you uncomfortable. It’s hard to totally set aside the teachings of our childhood. The Dhianna Herd does not mix with humans, so it wouldn’t be surprising if—”

  “No!” Brighid cut
her off. “By the Goddess, no! Humans don’t repulse me. Cuchulainn doesn’t repulse me. But what makes you think he desires me?”

  “I have eyes. I know my brother. You’re very beautiful, Brighid, and my brother has always been interested in beautiful women.”

  “I’m not a woman,” she said flatly.

  Elphame brushed aside her objection with a restless motion of her hand. “Men find you beautiful and desirable, just as centaurs do. You must know that. And it’s obvious Cu desires you. He’s not trying to hide his attraction.” Elphame shook her friend’s arm as if to shake some sense into her. “The two of you experienced something very intimate. I’m not sure about the details of how a Shaman brings a soul back to the land of the living, but I do know that you had to have been joined with him, spirit-to-spirit, for the retrieval to have been successful. And it was decidedly successful.”

  “El.” Brighid drew a deep breath and guided her friend closer to the edge of the cliff so the sound of crashing waves would ensure they wouldn’t be overheard. “Cuchulainn does not repel me. At all.”

  Elphame’s eyes widened and she grinned. “You desire him, too! Someday you’re going to have to tell me what does happen during a soul-retrieval.”

  “Elphame—do not get all doe-eyed and romantic about this. Keep it in perspective. What Cuchulainn is feeling for me is simply the residue of an unusually intimate experience.” She gave her friend a stern look. “And, no! I will not tell you the details.”

  El sighed. “I suppose I could ask Cuchulainn…”

  “Goddess, no!” Then the Huntress’s eyes narrowed as she understood her friend was only teasing. “This is not a matter for jesting.”

  “Sorry,” Elphame said insincerely.

  Brighid frowned at her. “As I was trying to explain—Cuchulainn just thinks he desires me because of what we experienced together. That will fade. That’s why it would be best if I absented myself from MacCallan Castle for a little while. To give him time to return to himself.”

  “I understand your reasoning. It’s highly logical and realistic.” Elphame smiled slyly at her friend. “And it doesn’t take into account my brother’s stubbornness.”

  “Of course it does.”

  Elphame laughed. “Do you remember when Cu first realized his feelings for Brenna were serious?”

  “Yes. His actions were far too annoying to easily forget. He made a complete ass of himself pursuing the poor girl relentlessly until she…” Brighid suddenly ran out of words.

  Elphame arched one brow. “So you didn’t take into account his stubbornness. I also couldn’t help but notice that you’ve said Cu’s feelings were caused by the soul-retrieval. But you’ve failed to mention much about your own.”

  “Your brother and I are friends. I like him and I respect him,” she prevaricated.

  “You are friends who care about and respect each other. Now add to that your beauty and the legendary centaur passion.” Elphame raised her voice and talked over her friend’s sarcastic snort. “Plus my brother’s definite flair with females, and then mix into it a soul-touching, intimate experience. Seems to me that unless you’re repulsed by humans it could all add up to much more than temporary infatuation.”

  Brighid stared down into the frothy ocean. She was incredibly moved by what Elphame was saying. Her friend was making it clear that she would accept any kind of relationship Brighid had with Cu. Her heart tripped around in her chest. If only…

  “It’s not that easy,” she finally said.

  “Love rarely is,” Elphame said.

  “El, I can’t love him! I can’t shape-shift.”

  “After what you’ve just experienced in the spirit realm I shouldn’t have to remind you that love has more to do with the soul than it does the body.”

  “Then I phrased it wrong,” Brighid said wearily. “The problem isn’t that I can’t love him. The problem is that if I do, I’ll forever desire what is absolutely and utterly impossible.”

  “Look, I know you don’t like to talk about it, but your mother is—” Elphame broke off at her friend’s look of shock. “I’m sorry, Brighid. I didn’t mean to cause you pain by bringing up your family.”

  “It’s not that.” Brighid wiped a shaky hand across her face. “It’s Brenna.”

  “Brenna?”

  “She—she came to me in a dream. Here, at MacCallan Castle. Oh, Goddess! I didn’t even realize until just now…”

  “What is it, Brighid?”

  The Huntress pressed her hand to her heart where it beat wildly against her chest. “She wanted my oath that I would keep an open mind to things that seemed impossible. She used that word exactly, El.”

  Elphame’s eyes were bright with tears. “Did Brenna look happy?”

  The Huntress nodded and her eyes filled, too.

  “Did she say anything else?”

  Brighid nodded slowly. “She said I could tell Cu about her visit, but not right away, that I’d know the right time. She also said that…” She hesitated, emotion choking her words.

  Elphame took her friend’s hand.

  “Oh, El—she said that she was leaving Cu to me. Freely, and without any hesitation. I—I thought she was talking about the soul-retrieval. I never thought…I didn’t realize…”

  “She was telling you that you have her blessing to love him,” Elphame said.

  “I think she was.”

  Elphame wiped at her cheeks. “Do you still think you should run away to Guardian Castle?”

  Brighid smiled through her tears at her friend. “I can’t. I swore an oath to be open to the impossible. I have to stay and face it.”

  “Well, my brother would certainly qualify as impossible.”

  “And there you, Brenna and I are in perfect agreement.”

  33

  “SO WHAT ARE you going to do about him?” Elphame asked, sniffling happily and wiping her eyes.

  “I don’t really know. I suppose I’ll just have to stay open to the possibility of…” She trailed off, feeling awkward and uncomfortable and extraordinarily out of her element.

  “You’re going to stay open to the possibility of having a relationship with my brother.”

  “Yes.”

  “Well, he’ll be glad to hear it.”

  Brighid gasped. “I’m not going to tell him!”

  “But—”

  “And neither are you. Please.”

  “Fine. I’ll stay out of it.”

  “Can we change the subject now?”

  “If you insist,” Elphame said.

  “I insist.”

  “Just know that I’m here if you need to talk to me. As your friend, or as your Chieftain, or as Cuchulainn’s sister if he doesn’t behave himself.”

  “Changing the subject?” Brighid reminded her.

  “I just wanted you to know.”

  “Thank you, now I know.” Brighid smiled fondly at her friend. “And I still want to change the subject.”

  “I suppose you actually want to know what we’re planning for the New Fomorian village.”

  “Absolutely.”

  “Would you like to return to the blueprints so that I can show you what Cu and I drafted this morning?” Elphame’s eyes glittered at the possibility of taking the Huntress back to her brother.

  “Why don’t you show me from here,” Brighid said dryly.

  Elphame huffed an exaggerated sigh, but began pointing and explaining that she and Cuchulainn had decided to—once again—break tradition. Because of the lack of a typical family structure, they would build one large barrackslike building to house the majority of the children. The structure would be situated not far from the southern wall of the castle. Radiating from it would be a few small cottages, where the adults, as well as the older children, could have privacy. The rest of the plateau would be tilled and planted with a variety of crops, which the New Fomorians could tend and use for trade as well as tithe to MacCallan Castle.

  “My hope is that eventually what happened
between you and Liam will happen with more of the children and the Clan,” Elphame continued.

  “You hope that the children will almost pester the Clan to death?”

  Elphame laughed. “You know better than that. That boy belongs to you. I’m hoping many of the children find a place in the hearts and homes of my people. But I want to be careful not to force them. It has to happen naturally, and that could take some time.”

  “Exactly like your brother and me,” Brighid muttered.

  El smiled. “Not exactly, but I get your meaning.” She hesitated, and her smile faded. “You’ve been busy, so I’m sure you haven’t noticed, but we’re missing several members of Clan MacCallan.”

  “How?”

  “The first group left the same day you did. I didn’t like it, but it didn’t surprise me. I released them from their oaths, and said that if any more of the Clan would like to join them to step forward.” Elphame shook her head sadly. “It still grieves me to think of it, but I do understand them. What we are proposing, to accept the return of a people who carry the blood of Partholon’s sworn enemies, is a radical thing.”

  “They also carry the blood of Partholonian women—innocent women who lost their homes and their lives, and whose children deserve to be given a chance,” Brighid said.

  “Not everyone believes that. Some people believe that anything with wings is a demon, despite what lives within his heart.”

  Brighid snorted. “I’m glad those people are gone. We’re well rid of them. You are The MacCallan. They should have trusted that you would never put them in jeopardy.”

  “I’m also mated to a man who carries the mark of his demon father’s blood.”

  “And who proved his loyalty to you!” Brighid said furiously, even as she remembered her own instinctive mistrust of Lochlan. But she hadn’t let her doubts cause her to desert her Chieftain. Those who left had been wrong. They should have stayed close to Elphame and kept watch to be sure she wasn’t in danger.

  “He proved his loyalty, and he still does—both to me and to Clan MacCallan, but that might not be enough to overcome more than a century of hatred.” Elphame met Brighid’s eyes. “You know that prejudice isn’t logical, which is why it is so hard to overcome.” She sighed. “And more left than just that first small group.”