The Husband She Can't Remember (Southwest Secrets Series Book 1)

by Tina Cambria

  But he didn’t think he could bear it if she didn’t want to stay married to him. How had he gotten so wrapped up in her in such a short time? And why wouldn’t her brain and her soul let her open her heart to him once again?

  He pulled her hands to his mouth and gently kissed them. “I don’t want to lose the baby either.”

  Just then, a woman in a white lab coat with the name Dr. Sloan embroidered in red above the breast pocket stepped into the exam room, followed by another woman wearing scrubs. The doctor looked to be in her mid- to late thirties, with intelligent eyes and a comforting smile.

  She introduced herself and then took a brief history from Danielle, finally asking her to recline on the table for an examination. Gently palpating the abdomen, the doctor then moved on to an internal exam. Removing her latex gloves and tossing them into the trash can, she smiled at them again. “Everything looks fine with the baby. There’s no sign of late miscarriage.”

  Both Kyle and Danielle seemed to exhale in tandem. “Then what’s causing the pain?” Danielle asked.

  “It’s actually normal to have some aches and pains in your belly,” Dr. Sloan explained. “As long as everything else is going fine with the pregnancy, it’s usually nothing to be concerned about.”

  The doctor motioned to a wall poster that showed how the baby grew during each month of the pregnancy. “Right now, your baby weighs almost five ounces and is close to five inches long. Add in the weight of the amniotic fluid that surrounds the baby and the increased weight of the uterus as it expands—well, it can put a lot of extra pressure on certain muscles and joints. As the pregnancy progresses, the ligaments that connect to your bones need to stretch to support your growing uterus. The expanding uterus has a tendency to tilt to the right, and that can cause pain on your right side from spasms.”

  Danielle’s eyes rounded. “You mean this may continue throughout the pregnancy?”

  “It may, indeed. In fact, you’re experiencing it a little sooner than I usually see. But there are a few ways to deal with it. Just sitting down can sometimes help. Or a warm bath might ease the pain.”

  Kyle felt a wash of relief that the baby appeared healthy, but he couldn’t stand the thought of Danielle experiencing severe pain. “Dr. Sloan, I’m concerned that my wife is having this pain relatively early in the pregnancy. It seems like it might get even worse as the baby gets bigger—like five or six pounds or even more. Is there anything else we can do to prevent an episode like this?”

  The doctor looked carefully at each of them. “I don’t mean to be overly-personal, but did you have sex shortly before this pain started?”

  “Uh, no,” Danielle mumbled, her face flushing.

  “Well, that can sometimes set off cramping and a mild backache, especially when you get further along into the third trimester.” Her assessing eyes swept over both of them. “There’s no restriction on having sex as long as everything else is going well. But I recommend that my patients take it a bit slower. Relaxed and easy can still be enjoyable for both of you.”

  Even though the woman was a physician, Kyle was still embarrassed to be discussing the pace and tempo he should adhere to when having sex with his wife. If he ever had sex with her again. That wasn’t a given. The decision was really Danielle’s to make.

  “Of course, if you experience heavy bleeding at any time,” Dr. Sloan continued, “you need to seek medical attention immediately. By the way, who is your regular obstetrician?”

  When Danielle told her that she’d been seeing Dr. Chartoff in New Loudon, the doctor looked surprised. “So, you don’t live here in town? Were you just visiting here when this pain started?”

  “No,” Danielle said. “We’ve moved here recently. I hadn’t decided about…about a new doctor yet.”

  Kyle knew the decision about her doctor was dependent on whether she was staying with him until the baby was born. If not, she’d just go back to New Loudon. But she couldn’t be thinking about moving in with Walter Ferguson.

  He didn’t even want to imagine them together.

  And the thought of Walter being the one who wiped Danielle’s brow during labor, who brought the newborn home from the hospital, who rocked the baby to sleep at night, so Danielle could get some extra rest—no, it sent a flood of acid churning into his stomach.

  He made up his mind that he was going to fight for Danielle. Fight to make her fall in love with him again. Fight to raise their baby together.

  If it somehow turned out that Walter Ferguson was the baby’s biological father, they’d find a way for him to be involved with the child. But Kyle wanted to be Danielle’s husband and the man who helped to tuck their little one in at night. And he wanted to have more babies with Danielle.

  If he could somehow make her feel the same way.

  * * *

  “Have you had your first ultrasound yet?” When Danielle shook her head, Dr. Sloan continued, “The first one is usually done between eighteen and twenty weeks. Dr. Chartoff was probably planning to do it at your next prenatal visit. I’d like to go ahead with it now. It will add that extra layer of confidence that everything is fine with the baby.”

  “All right,” Danielle said. “Dr. Chartoff used a portable device to check the baby’s heartbeat—that’s it.” She followed Dr. Sloan’s instructions to wait to be taken to a room with sophisticated ultrasound equipment. Within a few minutes, she and Kyle were in another room with a brown-haired young woman who introduced herself as the sonographer, the technician who would perform the ultrasound.

  Danielle quickly sucked in her breath as the sonographer rubbed a chilly gel on her belly.

  “Sorry, that’s the worst part,” the young woman said.

  “Is this the test where you find out if the baby’s a boy or a girl?” Kyle asked.

  “We usually can tell, but it may be a little too early to be sure.” She pressed a wand to Danielle’s skin and rubbed it over the abdominal area while she checked the video screen. “Do you want to know the baby’s sex?”

  “I guess so.” Danielle figured most expectant couples found out their baby’s sex ahead of time. But everything was happening too fast. A few minutes earlier she’d been afraid she was losing the baby. Now, she might know if it were a boy or a girl in just a moment. Her heart ticked faster.

  The door to the ultrasound room opened, and Dr. Sloan stepped inside, closing the door behind her. Squinting at the video screen, she said, “Fine healthy baby. Good heartbeat on this little one.”

  “Can you tell if it’s a boy or a girl?” Kyle asked, eagerness showing in his voice.

  The doctor moved closer to the screen and paused. “Unfortunately, no. The little angel’s hand is positioned absolutely perfectly to prevent us from seeing that part of the anatomy. Well, you’ll just have to wait a little longer to find out. I expect that Dr. Chartoff will order another ultrasound when you’re further along to check on the umbilical cord, the location of the placenta, and the overall size and well-being of the baby.”

  It would satisfy their curiosity to find out, but Danielle didn’t really care whether it was a boy or a girl. She was head over heels in love with the grainy image on the video screen.

  If only Kyle could feel the same way—about both her and the baby.

  How could she have ruined things with the most wonderful man she’d ever met?

  And when the doctor told her that she could expect to feel the baby’s first movement inside of her within the next few weeks, Danielle’s feelings were all over the place. She couldn’t wait for that thrill of her first real detection of the baby’s activity within her. But who would she share it with?

  Kyle was with her now to see the first graphic image of the child, but would he even care to place his hand on her belly to feel the fluttering that would soon be taking place?

  * * *

  By the time they got back to their apartment, it was well past nine o’clock in the evening. Despite the good news about the status of the baby, Kyle was worrie
d about Danielle.

  “You must be starving, going all that time without dinner.” Even though she protested, saying she’d been too busy to think about food because of all the stress, he insisted on getting her something to eat.

  He practically ordered her to change into her nightgown and robe, and then got her situated on the sofa with a pillow behind her back and her feet propped up. When she mentioned an unexpected craving for a veggie omelet, he promised to be back from the diner down the road in a matter of minutes.

  Now, as he spread the omelet, buttered sourdough toast, and a cup of strawberries and blueberries on the coffee table for Danielle, he wondered how long he’d be allowed to care for her—and the baby whose image they’d seen only a few hours before.

  There was no way of knowing at that moment who had fathered that baby. It no longer even mattered to him. But how did Danielle feel?

  Had she been carrying some sort of torch for Walter Ferguson all along? It sickened Kyle to think of the possibility that he’d just been some sort of acceptable substitute, merely good enough if Danielle’s true fantasy wasn’t available.

  He had to lay his cards on the table. If he didn’t, Danielle might be gone the next day. Back to New Loudon, back to Walter, taking away everything that had become most important to him. Everything that mattered to him could walk out of his life with barely a backward glance.

  He had to find out if she had real feelings for him—not just friendship and respect but full-blown, can’t-imagine-life-without-you kind of feelings. She’d found all that with him when they first met. He’d stake everything he owned on the way she’d felt after their first week together.

  Yet how she’d felt during their honeymoon didn’t matter anymore. Amnesia had taken away her memory of the love that had blossomed—make that exploded—in no more than a week’s time. If she couldn’t feel that way again, it was going to be hard to convince her to remain as his wife.

  But he had to try.

  He joined her on the sofa where she was heartily enjoying the omelet that he’d brought from the diner.

  “Want some toast?” she asked, holding a slice out to him. “You must be hungry too.”

  “Nah.” He tentatively stroked her belly. Did he still have the right to touch her there? To act protective toward the baby inside? “It’s more important for you to eat. Keep your energy up and make sure the baby has all the nutrients it needs.”

  “I was so relieved when Dr. Sloan confirmed that the baby’s developing normally.”

  “Me too.” Their eyes met, and Kyle was surprised to see tears flowing down her cheeks. “What’s wrong? You’re not having pain again, are you?”

  She shook her head and dabbed at the tears with the back of her hand. “I’m happy because the baby’s healthy. But…I just wish everything with us was the way it’s supposed to be.”

  “It could be, Danielle.” This was the moment to bare his soul to her. Time to tell her what was in his heart. She could accept him or reject him. But he couldn’t give up without trying. He’d never been labeled a quitter, and he wasn’t going to change his ways now.

  “How could it?” She wiped at the fresh onslaught of tears spilling from her eyes. “Not after what Walter said.”

  Inside his head, the whining of hurricane-force winds drowned out everything else. What he was going to say next was either going to send his life in the direction he desperately wanted—or lead him down a path that he might regret for a very long time. Did he have the courage to say it? Would his family object? Did he even care what his family would think?

  Danielle sat waiting for him to respond, her eyes filled with confusion.

  His decision made, he brushed her cheek with his hand. “What Walter said—or possibly did—doesn’t have to be an issue. I love you, and I still want to be your husband if you’ll have me.”

  CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

  Danielle froze, her hand immobilized in mid-air, like some kind of quirky statue holding a slice of toast as a peace offering.

  She’d just heard Kyle say that he didn’t care if Walter had been the one to father her child. He still wanted to be her husband. And he loved her.

  He’d said that he loved her.

  What kind of man could put something like what Walter claimed aside? Despite everything, he was willing to let her make the decision as to whether they would continue as a couple.

  If you’ll have me.

  That’s what he’d said. She was almost sure of it.

  Of course, she’d have him. She didn’t want any man but him. Yet how could he possibly feel the same way about her?

  Trying to make sense of what she thought she’d heard, she placed her toast with the rest of the food on the coffee table and turned to face Kyle. “I-I’m not sure what you mean. You don’t even care if this is another man’s baby?”

  “I want with all my heart for this baby to be the product of the love we shared on our wedding night. But we have no way to determine that until after the baby is born.”

  “There is a way, but—”

  “Not unless we want to put you at risk for miscarriage by getting an amniocentesis done.” He lightly placed a hand on her tummy. “I already love this baby, and I’m not willing to put it in jeopardy just so I can strut around like a proud peacock.”

  “But what if we do DNA testing after the baby arrives, and it shows that you’re not the father?”

  “I will be the father.” His eyes sparked with determination. “Meaning, it doesn’t matter to me whose DNA is in that baby. You and the baby are a package deal, and I want the whole package.”

  “I can’t believe what I’m hearing.” Was Kyle truly willing to accept her child as his own even if it had been fathered by a former boyfriend? Or a former acquaintance might be a better description of Walter.

  It seemed impossible that he was saying everything she wanted to hear.

  “I know you don’t remember any of this,” Kyle said, “but we started as fast friends. It’s true, physical attraction was there right from the beginning. And we did everything way too fast with our super-quick marriage, making love the first day we even met, and probably creating our baby that very night.” He gently drew one of her hands to his lips and kissed her palm. “I so want to believe that you and I created this baby together.”

  “I want to believe that too,” she whispered.

  “And I wish you could remember how our friendship and physical attraction quickly grew into real love. The kind you need to keep a marriage going for the long haul. Sure, we’re gonna fight. We’ll probably have a few problems along the way.” He gave her belly the slightest protective embrace. “But if you have the same kind of commitment to me that I have to you—the kind that makes it impossible to imagine going through life without each other—then we’ll work everything out.”

  Her vision blurred, and she realized her eyes were filling with tears again. “There’s just one thing you said that isn’t right.”

  “What?”

  “The part about me not remembering any of what happened when we first met.”

  At his expression of total incomprehension, Danielle recounted the minute snatches of memory that had occasionally begun popping to the surface. And the breakthrough that morning, with multiple images forming in her mind, apparently triggered by spilling the fragrance Kyle had worn on their honeymoon.

  “When you came in after work tonight, I wanted to tell you what I’d finally remembered. I realized that I actually had fallen in love with you during that first week. It was all real, so wonderful and special, and I wanted to be with you more than anything.” Her tears spilled again.

  “And how do you feel now?”

  “I love you, Kyle. You made me fall in love with you all over again.” She sniffled. “But I didn’t know how to make things right. Not after this whole thing with Walter.”

  “Screw Walter.” Kyle pulled her close to him. “He’s not going to mess up the most crazy-special thing that ever happened be
tween two people. If it turns out that he’s the biological father—and I don’t believe for a minute that he is—we’ll see what the courts say about his rights.”

  “It’s scary to think of a judge determining our fate.” Danielle’s throat tightened.

  “Look, if he’s entitled to visitation or anything like that, we’ll work it out. But as far as I’m concerned, I am this baby’s father.”

  Remembering Leslie’s warning about the baby being born with a shock of Walter’s reddish hair, Danielle said, “I guess we’ll have to do DNA testing after the birth, just so we’ll know the baby’s true medical history.”

  “Yeah, that’s fine. But in point of fact, I totally love this baby no matter what.” He gently kissed the top of her head. “And I feel the same way about the baby’s mother.”

  “How did I just get so unbelievably lucky?”

  “No, I’m the lucky one.”

  She laughed and flirtatiously tapped his chest with her index finger. “Is this one of those fights you just said we’re going to have along the way?”

  “If it’s the worst one we ever have, well, I sure won’t complain.”

  She looked at Kyle, all handsome, all caring, all saying that he loved her and the baby unconditionally. “I won’t complain if you come to bed with me now.”

  “Do you think that’s such a good idea after you’ve just been in the Emergency Department with such bad pain?”

  “I mean just to hold me and be with me all night. I want to be as close to you as I can get.”

  He met her gaze. “That’s right where I want to be too.”

  * * *

  Danielle awoke the next morning to the sound of running water coming from the bathroom.

  Kyle.

  He’d spent the night with her. In the same bed. They’d hugged and kissed and caressed and then fallen into an untroubled sleep.

  Not totally untroubled. There was still the issue of scientifically determining who had fathered her baby. But they were going to deal with that and not let it stand in the way of becoming a family.