All I Want for Christmas: a hilarious and heart-warming romance

by Joanna Bolouri

  Damn, he does know me well. I can’t help worrying that Sarah won’t want to get married again. Maybe that was it for her? I’ve always been hesitant to bring it up and she never has.

  ‘I don’t want her to feel like I think what we have isn’t enough,’ I respond. ‘Like maybe Alfie’s dad was the one true love of her life and she’d think I was trying to replace him?’

  ‘I think you think too much. Look, she just got a fixed-rate mortgage with you. That’s way more binding than marriage. She loves you. Alfie loves you.’

  ‘I asked his permission, you know. He’s so excited, even wished me good luck.’

  ‘See, there’s nothing stopping you! What are you waiting for?’

  I slip the ring back in my pocket, down my second drink and slide off the bar stool.

  ‘You’re right. What am I waiting for?’

  ‘What, now?’ Matt splutters as I march myself towards the pub door. ‘You’re doing it now?’

  ‘We’ll be back in fifteen! Get another round in!’

  I hurry out and back into the shopping centre, my eyes darting around as I look for Sarah and her bobble hat. My heart is racing. This has the potential to either be the best or worst day of my life. Adrenaline pumping, I weave in and out of shoppers, checking stores, before finally ending up at her old coffee shop at the end of the mall. I see her through the window, sitting at a table with two of her old colleagues.

  ‘Nick? Is that you?’

  Startled, I whip around in the direction of that familiar voice and see Izzy, in full elf costume, hands on hips and frowning at me like she’s just caught me shoplifting.

  ‘Hey! Izzy. Long time.’

  ‘I thought it was you. It’s very nice to see you.’

  ‘You sure? You look mad at me.’

  ‘I am sure.’

  ‘Still spreading Christmas cheer, I see,’ I say, gesturing to her outfit.

  She nods. ‘But this Santa is no good. Always with the nose blowing. You were better . . . Why you keep staring at the window?’

  ‘Sarah is in there, I’m just—’

  She peers in. ‘Oh, this one again with the little boy! Sorry, but she doesn’t work here anymore.’

  ‘Oh, I know, she’s just—’

  Izzy starts to laugh. I’m not sure I’ve seen Izzy laugh before. ‘First time you come here, you stare at her like a cachorro, wagging your tail when she talk with you. Now you come back and . . .’

  As Izzy continues to ramble, my mind flashes back to the time Sarah first ran into the grotto to find Alfie. How she looked at me and took my breath away. When I see her emerge from Belle Blend, I know exactly what I need to do.

  ‘Izzy,’ I say, interrupting her flow, ‘how do you say “good luck” in Spanish?’

  ‘Buena suerte.’

  ‘Thanks!’

  She tilts her head in confusion as I rush over to Sarah and take her by the hand, leading her towards the grotto.

  ‘Come on!’

  ‘What? Why? Nick, I don’t think you’re allowed to just—’

  ‘Please,’ I say. ‘Just trust me.’

  We both slip under the rope and I instruct Sarah to sit on the throne.

  She places her bags on the floor and takes a seat, looking around her nervously. I see the security guard at the door stop to stare at us. I don’t recognise him. I wonder what happened to Charles and his stupid beard.

  ‘You’re sitting in the same place I was when I first met you,’ I begin. ‘Three years ago, almost to the day.’

  Her face lights up and she laughs. ‘Oh my God, you’re right! I must have looked a right state, I was so flustered from racing around, looking for Alfie.’

  I shake my head. ‘I thought you looked beautiful. There’s not a day that goes by that I don’t think about how beautiful you are.’

  ‘Aww, honey, that’s so sweet of . . . um, Nick, that security guy is heading over here, we should probably move.’

  I glance over my shoulder to see him marching towards us. Fuck. I need to be quick.

  ‘Sarah, I love you . . . in fact, those words don’t even come close to how I feel about you,’ I say, reaching into my pocket. ‘I’m not even sure there are words—’

  ‘Sir, the grotto is closed, you can’t be in here.’

  As I get down on one knee, I hear Sarah gasp.

  ‘Just know that meeting you changed my life and—’

  ‘David, you take one more step and I kick you to death with my pointy shoes, tú hijo de puta! You want to ruin the magical moment my friend is having? Shame on you!’

  To my right I see a tiny Izzy squaring up to the six-foot-two security man standing outside the grotto. He physically recoils as she continues to block his path.

  Taking the ring box from my pocket, I open it in front of Sarah, who’s laughing and crying at the same time.

  ‘Oh, Nick, it’s beautiful.’

  ‘Sarah O’Brien. Will you marry—’

  ‘YES!’ she squeals, before I can even finish the question. ‘Fuck yes, I’ll marry you!’

  I slip the ring on to her finger, seconds before she launches herself from the throne, sending us both tumbling, along with that damn penguin who still can’t stay upright to save his life.

  And there, on the grotto floor, I kiss my future wife while a Spanish elf, still arguing loudly with a security guard, drowns out the Michael Bublé coming from the shopping centre sound system.

  God, I love Christmas.

  Acknowledgements

  I want to thank the following people, like they do in the Oscars, only with far more emotion and face fanning.

  Firstly, my editor Rachel Neely, because without you there would be no book. A million thanks for choosing me to write your wonderful story!

  Next a big shout out to the staff at Quercus who are always a pleasure to work with, as well as everyone at Susanna Lea Associates, especially my genius agent Kerry Glencorse. Thank you for continuing to champion me, even though I swear too much.

  Also, a huge thank you to all my amazing friends and family who have kept me sane during lockdown. I will hug you all an unreasonable amount as soon as we’re allowed within six feet of each other.

  Finally, the biggest thank you of all goes to my beautiful daughter Olivia. You are so, so loved.

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