Lincoln

by S. Nelson

  “I don’t know. Everything happened so fast.” He looked down briefly. “And now I’m gonna hear about it.”

  “I wouldn’t worry too much. I’m fine. Besides, Marek is gonna be so pissed at me when he finds out, no one will be worried about what you did, which was to defend us and get us all out of there alive.”

  I turned on the water and rinsed out the pan that had fallen, giving Jagger a perfect opportunity to start questioning me again, now that we got all that other stuff out of the way.

  He leaned his hip against the counter and crossed his arms over his chest. “Now, back to the girl.” He raised his brow and cocked his head, wearing his impatience all over his face once more. It was only when his tongue swept over his bottom lip, did I notice the corner of it was starting to swell.

  “Uh….” I stalled, continuing to wash the pan. I was almost finished when Jagger reached out and slapped the back of my head.

  “You better tell me right now.”

  “Uh…,” I repeated, glancing over at him, hoping he’d get frustrated with my lack of explanation and walk out of the kitchen. No such luck. After shutting off the water, I turned to face him, expelling the air from my lungs in frustration. “Where else was I supposed to take her?”

  “How about the bus stop? You could’ve given her some money and sent her on her way.” He grabbed the counter and bowed his head. “I can’t believe you took her in the first place,” he said, anger raising his voice.

  “Technically, the prospect gave her to me.”

  “That’s the story you’re goin’ with?”

  I looked away briefly, reining in my apprehension as well as my nerves. “Yes. It’s the truth. But I don’t think the others knew that he told me to take her. Just a feeling.”

  “Either way, it was a bad move.” He held up his hand when I opened my mouth to argue. “Listen. I saw her. It’s obvious she was in a bad way with them, and it’s obvious she needed help, but…” He trailed off, looking upward toward the ceiling to gather his next thoughts before making eye contact again. “It’s not like we can give her back.” He shook his head several times. “We gotta tell everyone what happened. But until then, you stay here where you’re safe. You and her both. I’ll call Prez and tell him we gotta have an impromptu first thing tomorrow.”

  Jagger pushed off the counter and mumbled something to himself before leaving the kitchen. The entire time we’d been in here, I’d forgotten that Maddie was all by herself out there, probably terrified. I rushed into the other room, but instead of finding her alone, Hawke and Brick flanked her on either side. At first glance, she looked scared, peering over at me with wide eyes, but the closer I stepped, I noticed her body language was more relaxed than I assumed it would be.

  “Are you sure you’re okay?” Brick asked, touching her shoulder, but when she jerked away, she bumped into Hawke, who instead of stepping back put his hand on her other shoulder.

  I stepped in front of her and reached for her hand, which she gave willingly. She huddled close to me.

  “They won’t do anything to you,” I said. “They’re good guys.” What I didn’t mention was that I was still unsure about Hawke. After what I saw in that basement, and his reaction and willingness to kill Tag, I didn’t know what his intentions toward any stranger would be, women included. Not that Marek would let him get away with harming a woman. That didn’t fly in our club. We once had a prospect a couple years back who beat his wife. He bragged about how he taught her a lesson, and Jagger, in turn, taught him one before we tossed him out, telling him if he ever laid a hand on her again, he’d end up six feet under. It was only now that I realized the older guys would’ve made good on that threat.

  “Come on. I’ll let you get settled while I make you some food.” I led her away from the other two and toward the last bedroom at the back of the clubhouse, neither of us saying another word. Once inside, I turned on the light and closed the door. Checking the bathroom, I made sure there was a towel and soap. “There’s plenty of hot water for you to take a shower.” I opened one of the dresser drawers and pulled out a plain black T-shirt long enough to cover her, which wasn’t hard to do given her height and stature. “There’s a knob under the faucet. Pull it down, and the shower will come on.” Maddie didn’t move a muscle. She just stared at me. When I licked my lips, she focused on my mouth, her attention both unnerving and thrilling. “Okay then,” I rushed to say, disappearing from the room before I did or said something inappropriate.

  Halfway down the hall, I heard arguing. I rushed toward the noise to find out what was goin’ on, only to find Hawke and Brick toe to toe, Brick towering over him like he did everyone else.

  “Are you out of your fuckin’ mind?” Hawke shouted, shoving him in the next breath. The nomad’s eyes widened when Brick didn’t move an inch.

  “What’s goin’ on?” I asked, tentatively walking up to them.

  Hawke directed his anger toward me now. “I’ll tell ya what’s goin’ on.” He pointed toward the hallway. “You bring that Reaper bitch into our clubhouse, and you think that’s okay?”

  I didn’t know what came over me, but before I could stop myself, I rushed toward him and tackled him, the both of us tumblin’ toward the ground. The rule of not putting my hands on the older guys in the club flew right out the motherfuckin’ window the second he insulted Maddie. I didn’t care if he’d been around for decades. I didn’t care if he was Tripp’s younger brother. I didn’t care about anything right then except for teaching him a lesson.

  Because I’d shocked him, Hawke never had a chance to react. I seized the opportunity to pop him in the mouth right before he managed to scramble to his feet.

  “What the fuck is wrong with you?” he asked, wiping the blood from his lip. “You’re the one who brought the enemy here, and this isn’t the first time you let them in.” His reference to Tag hadn’t gone over my head.

  “She’s not a Reaper,” I shouted, ready to run at him again, but Jagger appeared out of nowhere and stepped between us. Brick hung back, watching with an amused look on his face. I didn’t think he cared much for the guy and seemed fully on board with me clockin’ him.

  “Hawke,” Jagger said in warning, shaking his head before leaning into him, telling him somethin’ I couldn’t hear. Whatever it was made Hawke glare at me as he pulled his hair back off his face.

  “You assholes are soft. You don’t have the balls to do what it takes.” What did Jagger say to him?

  “Why? ’Cause we’re not killers?”

  Hawke didn’t respond; instead, he arched his brow, the corner of his lip curling upward. I couldn’t tell if what I said offended him or proved his point. He mumbled something to Jagger before he turned and walked out of the clubhouse.

  “What the hell is wrong with that guy?” Brick asked, taking a seat at the bar.

  “Hawke remembers all too well, like I do, the life we had to defend years ago. He doesn’t want us to invite that back in.”

  “Coulda fooled me. Seems like he longs for the good ol’ days,” I said sarcastically.

  “He doesn’t. None of us do. Which is why tomorrow Marek is gonna be furious about that girl.”

  Shit!

  For a moment, I forgot all about Maddie. I rushed down the hall without another word and barreled into the room I left her in, only to be stunned by what I saw when I entered.

  13

  I couldn’t remember the last time anyone treated me kindly, and even though I wasn’t sure yet of Lincoln’s motives, I relished in the warmth of the shower, biding my time until I found out for sure what my new life was gonna entail.

  Once I finished drying off, I stood in the middle of the bedroom completely naked, ready for what came next. My only hope was that he wasn’t as rough as Griller or any of the other guys.

  As soon as I heard the click of the door, I lowered my head, keeping my eyes on the ground. Oddly enough, one of my first thoughts, other than what was to come, was how clean the carpet looked a
nd felt against my feet. It was weird what the human brain concocted when in survival mode.

  The shouting from moments before was a noise I was unfortunately used to, but what I wasn’t familiar with was the unnerving silence surrounding me right now.

  Lincoln stood ten feet from me, the heat of his stare burning through me.

  The click of the door sounded again, but this time it was louder, Lincoln having shut the door with more aggression.

  “What are you doin’?”

  “What I’m supposed to,” I answered softly, hoping he heard me because I didn’t wish to repeat the words.

  “What do you mean?” He moved closer. “Look at me.” Shaking my head, I refused. “Maddie.” He said my name softer this time, and there was something laced in his tone that made me raise my head. Up… up… until I met his soul-searching eyes.

  “What do you mean you’re doin’ what you’re supposed to?” He studied me, but he wouldn’t find any answers plastered on my face. I’d learned how to hide my emotions behind a mask. It was the only way I survived as long as I had.

  “I’m thanking you for helping me.” I’d often had to thank Griller and his friends for the simplest of things, such as being allowed to use the bathroom, or for the necessary act of eating. It was their way of controlling me, demeaning me, and because I couldn’t fight back physically, I surrendered emotionally.

  “What exactly are you offerin’?”

  “Me.”

  Realization dawned, and he nodded slowly before his gaze perused my body. I kept my stare straight ahead, but seconds later, he was gone from in front of me, reappearing with the T-shirt in his hand, shoving it at me before he gave me his back.

  “Put it on.”

  I scrambled to pull the fabric over my head, the hemline falling less than an inch below my knees. A soft noise erupted from my throat, and that’s the moment he turned to face me again, looking over me from head to toe, his expression flat and unreadable.

  “I’m sorry you don’t find me desirable,” I mumbled, a tear drifting down my cheek. None of the other guys had told me to cover up before. In fact, there’d been a time when I wasn’t allowed to wear any clothes at all, nothing to shield me from their lecherous stares, invasive groping, and worse.

  “Is that what you think?”

  I gave him a curt nod, another tear falling down my face.

  He reached for my hand and pulled me toward the bed, motioning for me to take a seat on the edge. The mattress dipped with his weight when he sat next to me.

  “I find you very desirable.”

  My head shot up. “You do?” I didn’t know why I sounded surprised… and pleased?

  “Yes. But that doesn’t make a difference. I won’t touch you like that. No one here will. You can trust me. You’re safe here with us.”

  “No one will force me to have sex?”

  “Of course not.” He sounded offended. “Is that what they did?” He nodded before I even had the chance to respond, as if he’d answered his own question.

  “All the time. Sometimes only one of the guys would make me… and sometimes it was one after another.” My mouth wouldn’t stay shut, the words flowing from my lips effortlessly. “I told Griller I was a virgin, naively thinking he would spare me, but all my confession did was excite him.”

  There was something about Lincoln that, although I didn’t know him, made me want to tell him every sordid detail, my embarrassment falling to the wayside in exchange for someone’s compassion for my situation. It was the first time since I’d followed Pike into his club that I felt seen by another human being.

  A tense-filled moment passed before he asked, “How did you come to even be with them?”

  Dipping my head and saying a silent prayer for my deceased parents, I started telling him about how I ended up in California to begin with.

  “Two years ago, when I was sixteen, my mom went into the hospital to have her gallbladder removed, and she ended up getting an infection and dying three days later.” I thought I’d cried an ocean of tears for my mom, but apparently, there were more, several leaking from the corners of my eyes. I pulled myself together as best I could before continuing. “My dad didn’t deal well with her passing. She was the love of his life for nearly twenty-five years. He lost his faith and eventually his church, where he was a pastor. He started drinking more as the months went on until one night, nine months ago, he was driving home from the bar when he crashed into a tree. The police told me he died on impact. There weren’t any skid marks or any evidence he swerved to avoid something in the road.” Several tears escaped for my dad. “I don’t think he wanted to live without her.”

  “I’m so sorry, Maddie.” Lincoln rubbed my back in small circles. “I can’t even imagine how hard that must’ve all been.”

  “It was. It is,” I corrected, stalling for time because the next part of my story involved my imprisonment. “I was eighteen, a legal adult, when he died. My dad drank up whatever money was left after my mom was buried. Then when he passed, his life insurance policy was all I had, which was enough to bury him, leaving me with five thousand dollars afterward. I have one aunt, whom I haven’t seen in years because my father didn’t agree with her lifestyle, her being a lesbian, so I didn’t have anything tying me back home. I decided to come here, to California, and start over. Maybe go to college. I’ve always had an interest in photography.” I shrugged, the dreams I once had seeming like they belonged to someone else now. “Once I got off the bus, I walked into a nearby diner, and that’s where I met Pike.”

  “The prospect?”

  “Yes.” I didn’t know why I was hesitant to tell the rest of my story. I’d already revealed what those men did to me while they’d kept me against my will. “I thought he was handsome and charming. I’d never met anyone like him before.” Lincoln’s nostrils flared at my admission. “I was naïve, trusting him when he told me he wanted to take me to a party. A party that just so happened to be back at his club.” Lincoln closed his eyes and took a breath, but because he didn’t tell me to stop, I kept speaking. “Pike told me he liked me and wanted to spend some time with me.”

  “Then he should’ve taken you to a fuckin’ movie.” Lincoln hopped off the bed and started pacing.

  I held this need to stick up for the prospect. “He was nice to me when he could be, when no one else was around.” Lincoln scoffed before continuing to wear a hole in the carpet. “He told me they threatened him, that if he ever tried to leave, they’d not only kill him, but also his mom and his sister. So, he was as much a victim as I was.”

  “Like hell he was,” he shouted, reining in his temper when he saw me flinch. “He should’ve devised some sort of plan to get you out of there. He should’ve killed every last one of ’em.” Lincoln suddenly stood still; his eyes cast downward when he asked his next question. “Did Pike ever rape you?”

  How did I answer that question? While technically the answer was yes, the situation was muddled. Pike had never wanted to hurt me. They made him do it. So maybe the answer was no? I wasn’t sure, and while I racked my brain to come up with the right answer, Lincoln asked his question again, only this time, his tone deepened, restrained anger pricking each word.

  “Did Pike ever rape you?”

  “Yes,” I finally blurted. “Technically… yes.”

  “What does that mean? Technically?”

  “He didn’t want to. They made him.”

  Lincoln crouched down in front of me, grabbing on to my hands when he spoke again. “Maddie, no one, and I mean no one, would ever make me force myself on someone. I’d rather die first.”

  I pulled my hands from his in a harsh tug. “Then you’re a better man.” My response was filled with hurt and anger. Even after everything that happened, I still wanted to protect Pike, even if only his reputation. “He did help me in the end, when he pushed me toward you and away from Griller and the others.”

  He stood back up and continued pacing. I remained quiet for a few
moments, allowing him to absorb what I’d told him, while also giving me some time to calm the nerves swirling in my belly from recapping the worst months of my life.

  “What else did they do to you?”

  My chest deflated. I thought this conversation was over, and while I didn’t want to talk about it anymore, I felt like I owed it to him after all he’d done for me.

  “Griller would beat me for the simplest things. If I didn’t get him a drink fast enough, or if I made his food the wrong way. One time, he threw a full beer can at me, hitting me in the back of the head because… well, just because.”

  Several expletives fell from his mouth right before he ran his fingers through his hair, flinching when he touched his temple. “We’ll make them pay for what they did to you. Trust me on that.”

  Not knowing what to do with myself, I toyed with the bottom of my shirt, plucking off imaginary pieces of lint in order to have something to focus on other than the tightly wound guy wearing a hole in the carpet.

  I sucked in a quick breath when he suddenly appeared back in front of me.

  “Sorry.” His voice was tense. “I’m gonna make you that sandwich.”

  “I’m not hungry,” I whispered.

  “I think you need to eat somethin’.”

  “I just want to go to sleep, if that’s okay.” My voice was small, fragile sounding to my own ears.

  “Sure.” There was a slight pause before he added, “Of course. You must be exhausted.” He pulled down the blankets, fluffing the pillow afterward. When he retreated, he gave me a tight grin. “Get some rest. And don’t worry. No one will bother you.”

  I didn’t say a word as I climbed under the covers, pulling them up until they rested under my chin. Watching him walk away tore at a piece of me, and even as the odd sentiment took hold, I didn’t have the emotional strength to understand the notion.

  Right before he opened the bedroom door to leave, he turned to look at me.

  “I’m Lincoln, by the way.”

  “I know.”

  Whether he was surprised by my admission, he didn’t show it, instead disappearing and ending our brief back-and-forth.