Lincoln

by S. Nelson

  “What the hell are you talkin’ about?” Ace asked, peering around me so he could see the big guy.

  “You know. When someone saves someone, and that person then forms some sort of bond with the person who saved them.”

  “You mean like Stockholm syndrome?” Trigger involved himself in their asinine back-and-forth.

  “What the hell is wrong with you guys?” I hated they knew Maddie and I shared a moment, and I definitely wasn’t gonna tell them that I was her first kiss, but what they were spewing only served to piss me off more than I was when I first came out here. “Stockholm syndrome is when you kidnap someone, and then they develop ill-placed feelings toward you.”

  “Didn’t you kinda do that? Take her?” Brick looked too smug for my liking when he asked that question.

  “No. Well… yeah, but—”

  “Sounds like stalker syndrome to me,” Ace said, giving me a halfhearted shrug.

  I looked to each of them, waiting for any one of them to tell me they were joking, but all they did was shake their heads, as if they were disappointed in me, like I did something wrong where Maddie was concerned.

  “Fuck you guys!” I shouted, walking away from them before I ended up hitting all three of them. Well, two of them. I wouldn’t strike Trigger. He was an old man. Okay, maybe only one, since my hit wouldn’t do much damage to Brick. Fuck those guys.

  I thought I heard one of them laugh behind me, but my focus was now on my mom, who had just come into the clubhouse. She told me earlier she’d be back with the test results from Maddie’s physical, and while I wasn’t sure what kind of scene was gonna erupt with her being back so soon after scolding my ol’ man, I needed to know if Maddie was gonna be okay.

  As I opened my mouth to ask her what she knew, my dad barreled through the door, his sights set on his wife and no one else. He’d disappeared into Chambers immediately following their fight, but while I was gone, it appeared he’d gone outside somewhere because I hadn’t seen him until right then.

  He rushed up next to her and reached for her hand, but she stepped away before he made contact. “Addy.” His tone was filled with warning, but if he knew anything at all, it was that my mom wouldn’t cave because his voice was stern. If anything, he’d probably pissed her off more.

  “I’m not doin’ this right now. I have to go see Maddie.”

  He stepped in front of her, blocking her each time she tried to move around him, not a care in the world he had an audience. “I’m not stayin’ here just because you’re mad at me.”

  “You don’t have to stay here.” My attention bounced back and forth between them, my ol’ man’s expression softening when he heard that. “I’m sure Marek and Sully will let you stay with them for a while.”

  His eyes popped open, and he looked like he was ready to spit nails. “If you think for one second I’m gonna let you tell me—”

  “It’s done, Lincoln.” She said Lincoln with such disdain, it made me feel guilty for having the same name. Then she turned her sights on me. “I need to talk to you.” Her tone relaxed when she addressed me. “Come with me.” She pulled me into one of the corners of the large room, not once glancing back at my dad to see what he was doing. I didn’t dare look because, honestly, I didn’t want to get involved.

  “What is it? Is Maddie okay?” My pulse quickened at the thought there could be something wrong with her.

  “She has a bladder infection, which is what I thought. I have some antibiotics for her, so she should start to feel better soon.”

  “Is there anything else?”

  The way she looked at me made me nervous, but when she responded, “No,” I released some of the tension I’d been holding onto. The possibility Maddie could’ve potentially been dealt more of a raw deal had weighed on me more than I thought possible, and even though I had no idea what those options could’ve been, my mom’s words erased the worry.

  Now I could focus on helping her heal emotionally from the trauma she’d suffered.

  25

  I heard voices next to the bed, and it took me a moment to realize I wasn’t dreaming but instead had company. Prying my eyes open, a more difficult feat than I thought considering I’d only been resting for close to an hour, I saw Lincoln and his mom. They’d been talking low, but when they realized I was awake, they both stepped toward the bed.

  Sitting up, I leaned against the wall behind me because there was no headboard.

  “Hi, honey.” Addy sat on the edge of the bed and patted my hand. She looked up at Lincoln before returning her focus onto me. “So, it was as I thought. You have a bladder infection, but that’s easily taken care of.” She reached into her bag and pulled out a pill bottle. “These are antibiotics.” She handed them to me. “You’ll start to feel better within a day or two.”

  Clutching the bottle in my hand, I said, “Thank you for helping me.”

  “Of course.”

  “And, now I have to use the bathroom.” Addy stood, allowing me room to get up. “I’ll be right back.” I caught Lincoln staring at me as I walked away. I really hoped he didn’t hold my earlier boldness against me. I didn’t know what I’d do if he started to ignore me, or worse, view me as a problem.

  After I reemerged, I noticed the two of them huddled close and whispering, Lincoln’s voice stern when he responded to whatever his mom said. I cleared my throat when they continued talking, not wanting to eavesdrop on their conversation but wanting to thank her again for tending to me so quickly.

  Addy wandered a few steps closer, resting her hand on my shoulder.

  “Is something else wrong?” I asked.

  “No. I wanted to tell you that since your periods aren’t regular, you can start taking the pill to fix that issue. You can be put on a low-dose estrogen, and if you have any issues, we can always switch you. If this is something you’re interested in, you’d have to have an exam first. Have you ever had one before?

  While I was naïve in many factors of life, I realized the exam she referred to was a gynecological one. “No, I haven’t.”

  “Well, let me know if you want to go this route and I can set everything up for you.”

  I nodded before glancing at Lincoln, thinking that the moment our eyes met, I’d feel some sense of embarrassment because of the intimate topic, but I didn’t. There was something about him that put me at ease, even while talking about womanly things.

  “After everything you’ve been through, I’m happy you didn’t end up pregnant on top of everything else. And you have a clean bill of health. Take the antibiotics and you’ll be as good as new in no time.”

  “Thanks again,” I said. My gratitude didn’t seem enough for everything she’d done for me, but it was all I had.

  “Of course, sweetheart.” She turned to face her son. “Walk me out.”

  They both disappeared, closing the door behind them. Whatever she wanted to talk to him about was to be kept private; otherwise, she would’ve told him in front of me. But I couldn’t wonder about what they were discussing. I wanted to focus only on the good news she’d given me, not that having a bladder infection was positive, but the fact I wasn’t pregnant and hadn’t contracted any diseases from those animals helped to erase some of the anxiety from simply contemplating the likelihoods.

  A few minutes after they left, I heard Lincoln shout, “Mom! I know.” They weren’t far down the hallway. “Why does everyone think so badly of me?” He lowered his voice toward the end of his question, but his anger was apparent. I moved across the room, curious as to what was going on out there, but the door swung open before I could put my ear against it. And good thing too because he probably would’ve knocked me over.

  Lincoln stood before me, his expression matching the tone I’d heard.

  “Unbelievable,” he muttered, entering the room before slamming the door. When he saw he’d startled me, he apologized. “I don’t know why everyone thinks I’m gonna take advantage of you.” He paced, his hand running over the top of his hair
before dropping to his side. “I’m not an asshole.” I retook my seat on the edge of the bed, watching him as he moved back and forth. His next words were jumbled together, not making a lick of sense to me, but I didn’t think they were supposed to.

  I didn’t interrupt him, but after some time with still no words exchanged between us, my curiosity finally won out.

  “What did your mom say that made you so upset?”

  At first, he frowned, clearly contemplating on whether to answer my question. Then when his expression relaxed, followed by his posture, he leaned against the dresser and shoved his hands in his pockets.

  “She told me that if we do anything, I should cover up.”

  Tilting my head slightly to the side, I asked, “What does that mean?”

  He licked his lips, the corners of his mouth lifting slightly when he caught me staring. “It means that if we have sex, she wants me to wear a condom, which I would do regardless… if ever that happened… if you wanted to.”

  “Um… I… uh… I’m not sure—”

  Lincoln was next to me before my brain could finish stringing my words together to form any sort of coherent sentence. “Maddie, I’m not saying we’re gonna have sex.”

  “Oh. You don’t want to do that with me?” I couldn’t believe I was disappointed. I shouldn’t ever want to think about having sex with anyone ever again. Not that what had happened between me and those bastards was sex, because it wasn’t. But still, the intimate act, the vulnerability, the opening of myself to another, both physically and emotionally… it should be the farthest from my mind.

  But Lincoln wasn’t just anyone.

  My heart told me he was someone special.

  Maybe even the one.

  Oh, who was I kidding? I couldn’t trust myself to think or feel anything right now, even as my brain and heart battled. And at this point, I wasn’t sure which one would come out on top.

  “No. I mean, that’s not what I’m saying.” His chest expanded, the fabric of his shirt stretching over his defined muscles. “Of course, I want to. But after what you’ve been through, I would never expect you to want to be with me… in that way.” Although the topic was touchy, I appreciated that he at least sounded nervous discussing it. I found it endearing. He cared about me, about how I felt, which only made me want to be that much closer to him in any way possible.

  Damn conflicting emotions.

  Thinking it would be safer to change the subject, I lost myself in the way he looked at me for a moment. The rich coloring of his irises drew me in so deeply I didn’t want to look anywhere else. An emotion glimmered behind his entrancing gaze, but I couldn’t readily decipher what it was. Adoration? Lust? Pity?

  “Am I gonna have to leave soon?”

  “Leave where? Here?” Before he allowed me to respond, he asked another question. “Do you want to leave?” The bed dipped when he sat next to me, allowing me to stop straining the muscles in my neck from having to look up at him.

  “No.” When he placed his hand on top of mine, I stiffened. “Sorry,” I whispered, having no idea why I reacted like that. He moved to pull his hand away, but I caught his fingers with mine and entwined them. “I don’t want to go anywhere.” A ghost of a smile pulled at the edges of his mouth before quickly falling when I added, “I’m scared.”

  He wrapped his arm around me and pulled me into him, his scent calming my erupting nerves. “Don’t be scared. I won’t let anything happen to you.” Part of me was desperate to believe him, but I’d witnessed firsthand how evil the Reapers were, and I would continue to fear them coming after me, even though I had a feeling Lincoln and his friends would do all they could to keep me safe. But in the end, only fate would know the outcome of my future, or lack thereof. “I got you,” he continued to say, kissing the top of my head and holding me close. Wishing to escape the depths of my wayward thoughts, I wanted to sink into him, to disappear inside him so I would be safe from the world. Safe from my own mind, but the only thing I could do was to allow him to comfort me.

  After several minutes, I pulled back, smiling at him to let him know I was okay. “It’s been a day,” I half laughed. There wasn’t anything amusing about my situation, but I was grateful I hadn’t received devastating news. “I think I’d like to lie back down if that’s okay.”

  “Of course.” Lincoln kissed my temple, his lips lingering a few seconds longer than necessary, but I wasn’t complaining. When he did finally pull away, he asked, “Can I get you anything? Are you hungry?”

  “No. I had some pizza before.”

  “At least they had the sense to get something in your stomach, other than those drinks.” His voice wasn’t tense, but I saw the quick tic of his jaw.

  “They were all nice to me. I wasn’t afraid.”

  “That’s good.” He stared at me for a couple more seconds before standing.

  “I’ll be around if you need me.”

  “Thank you.”

  I crawled under the blankets after he left, and as my eyes drifted closed, the oddest question barreled through my brain. If I had the opportunity to go back in time, would I have still accepted the ride from Pike? Would I have subjected myself to the abuse of those men simply for the opportunity to meet Lincoln? A rational person would scream no, but something deep in my soul made me teeter between safety and… hell, I didn’t know what the other feeling was. All I knew was that every time I set eyes on him, heard his voice, or felt his touch, my heart ached, and my instincts told me I belonged to him.

  26

  A week had passed and still the Reapers hadn’t made a move. Not knowing where or how they were gonna strike only made everyone more on edge than they already were.

  On top of everything else, Maddie seemed to be in a funk, not that I could blame her. She was dealin’ with a lot, but at least she wasn’t pregnant. I couldn’t even imagine how devastating that would be for her if the test results had come back positive.

  I checked on her often, even bringing her a television so she could stare at something other than the four walls shielding her from the rest of the world. Her appetite picked up, which I was happy about, but just when I thought we were making headway, she shut back down, uttering one-word answers every now and then. No two hours were the same. Sometimes she was sullen, and sometimes she acted like she didn’t want me to leave her side. In the end, I took my cues from her moods, reacting accordingly and never pushing her to do or say anything I believed she wasn’t comfortable with.

  There were many times I thought about that kiss, although I didn’t dare mention it for fear she’d tell me she regretted it.

  “If you don’t sit down soon, I’m gonna tackle your ass,” Hawke grumbled, sitting on the sofa with a beer in hand. He looked a bit worse for wear, his hair messed, and his clothes wrinkled, looking like he’d been through the wringer.

  The jury was still out on what I thought of him, but I had no energy to give to that right now. I needed to think of something to do for Maddie to cheer her up.

  Simple ideas came to mind, from watching a movie with her to making her favorite food, whatever that might be. And by making her food, of course I meant ordering the dish from a local restaurant. I didn’t want to give her food poisoning. Before I could decide on what would do the trick, my sister’s name popped up on my phone… then an idea hit me full force, making me smile.

  “Hello.”

  “Hey, is Dad still there?” she asked. I heard people talking in the background and assumed she was at work.

  “I think he left about an hour ago. Why?”

  “Can you check?”

  Walking through the clubhouse, I checked all the bedrooms, minus the one Maddie was in, the kitchen, Chambers, and the two other rooms that were hardly ever used.

  Making my way outside, I checked the garage, then looked around the wide-open space and still didn’t see the man. “Nope, doesn’t look like he’s here. Why?”

  No response to me, but I heard her talking to someone else. I
waited impatiently while she finished her short conversation, but still, she didn’t answer me.

  “Riley!”

  “Oh, sorry. Is he gone?”

  “I told you yes. Why do you wanna know?”

  She huffed, and I was two seconds away from hangin’ up on her but didn’t. “I wanted to stop by and check on Maddie. See how’s she doin’. Poor girl is surrounded by male energy. I feel bad for her.”

  “Me too.”

  “I think you might feel somethin’ else for her.” The teasing in her voice irritated me, mainly because I wasn’t completely sure of my feelings toward Maddie.

  I thought she was beautiful.

  I wanted to protect her because I felt responsible for her.

  I was definitely attracted to her, as was proven by that kiss.

  But did my feelings go beyond that?

  Whenever I looked into her eyes, I wanted to grab her and hold her close, cursing the times we had to separate. I wanted to fight all her battles. I wanted to promise her everything would turn out fine, but I had no such knowledge of what the future held. She was safe with us, but could I guarantee she’d never be put in harm’s way again? No, and that knowledge tore me up.

  “Hello? Are you still there?”

  “Yeah,” I hurriedly answered, wondering if Riley would say something else about me and Maddie.

  “Okay, I have a break between clients, so I’m gonna swing by soon.”

  “Why didn’t you want to come by while Dad was here?” I asked a question I already knew the answer to.

  “Because he’s bein’ a pain in the ass.”

  “What’s new there?” The memory of the blowup last week was still fresh in our minds.

  “Kaden’s done with whatever it is he’s doin’.” Her tone dipped, sounding angrier than not. “And he said he’ll be back in the garage in the next half hour. I just don’t want another encounter like last time.”