To All the Cowboys I've Loved Before

by D. R. Graham

  I don’t even know anybody who could have paid off the full three hundred thousand dollars. It has to be a mistake. “Are you sure you can’t figure out where the payment came from?” I ask her.

  She scrolls down on the screen. “It was transferred from another account at this branch. Hold on. Maybe I can search it.” She opens a different screen and types on the keyboard. “Looks like the account belongs to C. Mathers.”

  What? The shock literally blows me back against the chair. With a huge grin on my face I spin to look at Dad to see if he can believe it, but instead of making eye contact with me, he gets up and walks out of the office. Ah, that’s priceless. He’s never going to live that one down. I chuckle and sign the papers. Then I transfer Della’s money back to her account and rip up the checks from everyone else.

  Dad is waiting for me outside, leaned up against the truck.

  “You want to explain why Crystal paid off our mortgage?” I ask to tease him.

  “Nope.”

  I laugh and climb behind the wheel. He sulks all the way home, and then gets downright bitter when he sees a red Chevy parked beside Della’s VW in front of the house. I’m so pumped to see Della I’ve got the door open before the truck even stops rolling. Dad’s acting as if he would rather wrestle a mountain lion than follow me inside. Della must have heard us drive up because she swings the front screen door open and bounds out onto the porch. She leaps off the steps and runs to jump in my arms. I spin her around and then place her back on the ground so I can kiss her.

  “Hi.” I smile.

  “Hi.” She gazes deep into my eyes. “How’d it go at the bank?”

  “Really well,” I whisper in her ear. “And we didn’t need to use any of your money.”

  “Really?”

  We both turn as Crystal steps out onto the porch with two bowls of homemade ice cream. “A little bird told me a celebration is in order,” she says as she winks at me.

  Sill holding Della’s hand, I lead her up onto the porch and kiss Crystal’s cheek. “Thank you for paying off the loan. We’ll pay you back as soon as we can.”

  “Don’t mention it,” she says as she hands me one of the bowls. “And I know you will pay me back when you can. I’m not worried about that.”

  I stretch my arm across Della’s shoulders and feed her a spoonful of ice cream. God, I’ve missed her. “What do you say to Crystal, Dad?”

  He’s still lingering by the truck with his hands jammed in his pockets and kicks the tire before he mumbles to Crystal, “I didn’t ask you to do that.”

  “No kidding?” Crystal jokes as she slides onto a rocking chair and dips a spoon into the ice cream. “You didn’t even tell me you were about to lose the land. I would have paid it off a long time ago and saved Easton a bunch of headaches if you’d told me about it yourself. But instead I had to hear about it from gossip.”

  “We had it covered.” He says, sulkily.

  “Mm hmm,” she says. “Turns out Brad the banker has been taking kickbacks from the commodities company in exchange for confidential client information. Did you also have that covered? Or, is it a good thing that I filed a report with the bank?”

  Dad grumbles.

  “How did you know that about Brad?” I ask Crystal.

  “It’s a small town. People talk.” She lifts her eyebrows in an animated way. “Specifically, the woman who was formerly sleeping with Brad talked.” She shrugs and eats another spoonful of ice cream. “He probably won’t be charged with anything, but he might get fired. And the company won’t try to bully anyone else around here.” She points at me. “And that lawyer of yours was talking to some out-of-towners in trucks in front of the diner, so stop paying him for doing nothin’ for you.”

  Dad ventures up onto the porch and sits on the railing with his arms crossed.

  “Stop being such a grump, Jack. I brought pie, too.”

  “I’ll get it,” Della says as she breezes inside.

  “Why are you being such a baby?” Crystal chuckles. “I got nothing better to do with my money than help your sorry ass out of a bind.”

  Della returns and hands Dad a piece of blueberry pie.

  “And while we’re on the topic of your less than exemplary communication skills, this is probably as good a time as any to tell Easton,” Crystal adds.

  Dad rolls his eyes and balances the plate on the railing as if he’s lost his appetite.

  “Tell me what?”

  Della glances between Dad and Crystal in amused anticipation.

  “Jack,” Crystal says to prod him.

  He mumbles something under his breath, then says, “Crystal and I have been dating.” He picks the pie plate back up and shovels a huge forkful into his mouth, so he won’t have to say anything else.

  “For four years,” Crystal adds and shoots me an apologetic look. “He wouldn’t let me tell you. Lord knows why.”

  Okay. Wow. Not sure how I didn’t suspect anything. I always knew he had a thing for her. I’m totally fine with it, but I don’t know what to say exactly.

  “That’s fantastic news,” Della answers for me and claps excitedly as she walks over and bends at the waist to give Dad a kiss on the cheek. “Don’t screw it up,” she whispers to him. “We can’t let anything come between us and the ice cream supply.”

  He shakes his head, embarrassed.

  Della spins around with her arms in the air and then crouches to scratch Brewster behind the ears. “Guess what, boy? It’s been a great day. Everybody gets to still live here. Jack and Crystal are in love. Della and Easton get free homemade ice cream. And my sister is pregnant again. Life doesn’t get any better than that. Does it?” She rests her forehead on his for a second and then she skips over and throws her arms around me. “I also applied for you to get permission to challenge Cavendish’s class, so you don’t have to re-take it.” She hands me a confirmation letter of the request from the school and grooves her neck and shoulders back and forth in a pseudo hip hop celebratory move.

  It’s so goofy it even makes my dad smile. It’s impossible not to adore her. “You guys don’t mind if we excuse ourselves, do you?” I say and grasp Della’s hand, so she’ll follow me.

  Crystal smiles. Dad shrugs, like he’d rather not know the details, before he takes another bite of pie. Della rushes with me across the yard to the barn, then I press her up against the wall at the bottom of the loft stairs. Her hair is wild and she’s breathing heavy. Without a doubt she is the person I want to spend the rest of my life with.

  “Is now a good time to talk about the future of our relationship?” I ask.

  She dips her finger in the ice cream bowl that I’m still holding and touches my lips so she can kiss it off. “I want to always feel the way I feel when I’m with you,” she whispers. “That’s all the talking I need to do.”

  Sounds good to me. I smile, swoop her up, and carry her to the loft.

  Epilogue

  Della

  Two Years Later

  ‘‘Yeah, baby!” I shout, jumping up and down on the spot and whistling with my fingers in my mouth. Whoops, just spilled my popcorn. Easton winks up at me from the middle of the arena as he waits for his score. Eighty-seven. “Woo!” That should be good enough for the win. Chuck and BJ might not be thrilled, but hopefully they’re also going to place. Just like old times.

  “Hey.” Chuck plops down next to me on the bleachers and wraps his arm around my neck for an embrace that is half hug, half headlock. I nearly didn’t recognize him when I first spotted him. He has a completely normal haircut now. He’s actually kind of handsome. “How’s our Little Miss Oh My Gosh?”

  “I’m great. Thanks for flying in for our roomie reunion.” BJ and Easton also climb up the bleachers to join us to watch the bulls. Easton sits on the bench in front of me, so I lean over his shoulder to give him a congratulatory kiss on the cheek before I stand to hug BJ. It’s the first time I’ve seen him since he moved back to Texas two years ago. “It’s nice to see you, Baile
y Congratulations on finishing your MBA.”

  He nods and sits next to me. “Thanks. I also landed a job in Houston, close to my mom and sisters.”

  “And close to your lady lawyer friend, too?” I needle him in the ribs to tease him. “Easton said you’ve being seeing her for almost a year. Sounds pretty serious?”

  His eyebrows flick. “Yeah. She’s great. Y’all will have to come down and meet her sometime.”

  “Definitely.” I slide one arm over BJ’s shoulder and one over Chuck’s. “How’s it going working for your dad in Portland, Taylor?”

  He shrugs less than enthusiastically. “It’s fertilizer. Not exactly exciting.”

  “Lucrative, though,” BJ says as he watches a rider get thrown from a bull.

  “True.” Chuck says. “But I want to get out of Portland.”

  “Still no serious girlfriend?” I ask.

  He shakes his head.

  “So, my efforts to train you didn’t have any lasting effect?”

  All three of them laugh as if it was a lost cause in the first place. On the bright side, Chuck hasn’t said or done anything crude so far. So I’m still going to hold out hope. It’s so nice to be all together again. It would have been fun to go back to the Palo Alto house all together instead of staying at a hotel, but Easton and I have new roommates, so unfortunately, there isn’t room for the guys to stay over. I love that house. It’s going to be heartbreaking to say goodbye to it at the end of this term.

  “Excuse me,” I say to a boy who is about twelve years old and staring at the guys as if they are Gods or something. “Would you please take a photo of us?”

  He hops up excitedly as I hand him my camera. “Yes, ma’am.”

  We all pose in front of the railing with a bull ride going on behind us. “Thank you,” I say as I take the camera back and check the shot as we all sit back down. It’s such a great picture. They all have their chaps on, and it brings back so many memories as I stare at it—a mixture of happiness and sadness. I guess that’s what nostalgia is. I’ve never felt nostalgic for anything before.

  I still think rodeo people are lunatics, but Easton loves it. Even though he didn’t need to, he wanted to graduate when I did, so he took time off school to tie up all the loose ends at the ranch and to have his knee surgery. He went back to modeling after his surgery, while waiting for his knee to heal enough so he could compete again. That work with Stuart parlayed into a bunch of international runway shows, several endorsement deals for bronc riding, and more print contracts with a cologne company and a watch brand. He did a lot of traveling, but I was lucky enough to tag along for some of the trips.

  He cut back on modeling when he came back to school full-time. He still goes out to the ranch one weekend every month to help, not that he needs to. His dad’s cancer is in remission and Crystal moved in. They also hired two extra ranch hands, and everything is running smoothly. As soon as Easton graduates, he’s going to hire a company to come in and start extracting the gold on the property. Fingers crossed they’ll strike it rich.

  “Oooh,” all three of the guys groan and wince simultaneously as a bull rider bites the dust. Literally. He landed face first and his back is bent in an unnatural way. He doesn’t seem to care that he has a mouthful of dirt. He waves at the crowd to let them know he’s okay. Although, based on how he is stumbling towards the fence, I’m guessing he’s not okay. Crazy cowboys.

  Chuck leans back against the bench behind him. “Man, I miss shooting the shit with you guys. Sorry for cursing,” he adds without looking at me.

  I wave my hand to indicate that I’m not as uptight and prudish as the first time we were at this rodeo. “Cursing, manure, serious injuries and all, I miss you guys, too. And I’m glad we decided to do this.”

  “I also miss my mullet,” Chuck laments.

  “No!” we all shout at the same time.

  I rub his sandy blond curls. “Don’t ever disrespect your head like that again. This is much better.”

  Easton leans back from the bench in front of me and rests his elbows on my knees. “What do you say we go to that same steakhouse we went to the first time we brought Della here?”

  “Yes.” I lean forward and remove his hat to kiss his forehead. “And can we go to that bar with the longhorn thing on the dance floor?”

  He smiles and pretends to debate it in his mind before he eventually agrees. “Sure.”

  Both Chuck and BJ grin, oddly enthusiastically, as if the three of them are in on something together. “What?” I ask, suspicious of any time that all three of them are smiling like that simultaneously.

  “I get the first dance,” BJ says.

  I hold up my hands in surrender. “I still can’t dance. Fair warning.”

  It’s only ten o’clock when we arrive at the country bar, so it’s not busy yet. It’s weird to be here. It looks exactly how I remember it, but it feels different. The first time we were here I felt like such an outsider in a world I knew nothing about. Now, it’s a part of who I am, so familiar and comfortable. Easton even called ahead to reserve the exact same table we stood at two years ago. So, sweet.

  “Virgin margarita,” Chuck says as he places a drink in front of me.

  I sip it and it actually is a virgin.

  BJ clinks his glass with mine and says, “Cheers to the good girl.”

  With a grin I hold my glass in the air. “To all the cowboys I’ve loved before. Great roomies and best friends.”

  After enthusiastically toasting to that, Chuck wraps his arm across my shoulders and squeezes me into a slightly jarring sideways hug. “You’re finally proud to call me a friend. I’m touched.”

  I shove him away playfully. “I haven’t seen you in a while. Maybe the secret to getting along with you is not spending any time with you.”

  He laughs. “Whatever it takes. You called me a best friend. You can’t take it back now.”

  Oh. My. Gosh. My jaw drops as I catch a glimpse of a familiar face in the doorway. That can’t be a coincidence. She smiles and waves as she makes her way across the bar. “Janine!” I squeal and rush to hug her. “What are you doing here?”

  “Havie invited me to the reunion.” She glances at Chuck, who is frozen in stunned shock with his beer bottle suspended halfway to his mouth. She smiles demurely. “Hi Taylor.”

  “Hi Babe.” He blinks repeatedly, sort of dumfounded. “You look great.”

  She does look stunning. Her hair is silky straight and shorter than she used to wear it. And although she is wearing simple dark jeans and a white blouse, it’s a sophisticated Manhattan casual look. Way different than the Oklahoma farm girl casual look that she used to have. Her cheeks blush from Chuck’s compliment and she tucks her hair behind her ears. “You look good, too.”

  He stares at her, completely thrown off. It’s as if he’s seeing her for the very first time, like he never truly noticed her before. BJ and Easton exchange a look, amused by the sparks that are flying. The staring with no speaking goes on too long and Janine turns away from the awkwardness to hug Easton and BJ. They ask her about New York and her residency. Chuck hangs on to every word she says, not distracted, not interrupting, and genuinely interested. Eventually she sneaks a side peek at him, clearly as shocked by his uncharacteristic quietness as the rest of us.

  “You want to dance?” he asks her.

  She glances at me and then back at him. After a long hesitation she says, “Sure.”

  I silently clutch both Easton and BJ’s arms to contain my excitement. Chuck and Janine hit the dance floor and start to two-step, just like they were meant to be together. I bounce up and down on the spot. Yay. I love happy endings. I smack Easton’s chest. “Why didn’t you tell me Janine was coming to the reunion?”

  His eyebrows angle together comically. “You can’t keep secrets.”

  “True.” I chuckle as I pick up my margarita to sip the slush. Over the rim of the glass I notice another unexpected guest standing at the other end of the bar—a very
pregnant Tracy. She’s with her husband Jeff, her brother Mike, and, “What the what?” she’s also with Jack and Crystal. I spin around to face Easton. “Why is everyone from Three Rivers here?”

  “It’s a reunion,” he quips and turns to greet them.

  Okay, what’s going on? I’m confused. Jack and Crystal are here, in a bar five hours away from where they live. Jack doesn’t even like driving from the ranch to Three Rivers if he doesn’t have to. And he’s only visited us in Palo Alto once. Bizarre. I hug everyone and then make eye contact with Easton to question him. He winks.

  What has he been up to? I love it. I just can’t believe it. I had no idea he’d been planning something so elaborate. It’s a nice surprise. Too bad they didn’t come earlier to watch the rodeo.

  Arms circle around my waist from behind and I know instantly who it is as she screeches, “Surprise, Dee Dee!”

  I whirl around and squeal as I hug Yulia so hard we almost fall down. I kiss both her cheeks and then reach over to hug Alex. He’s very preppy and stands out terribly in a country bar. I can’t believe he even agreed to come. “What are you doing here, I can’t even, how did you not spill the beans, who’s watching the girls?”

  “Alex’s parents are spending the weekend at the house,” she says before she takes a sip of a beer. “God, I needed this break.”

  I shake my head, so overwhelmed. “And you decided to come here?”

  Yulia shrugs innocently. “Easton wanted to surprise you. Aren’t you happy to see us?”

  “Yes, but.” I scratch my head and search for Easton. He glances at me from across the crowd and nods towards the door, so I’ll shift my attention. Okay. This is too strange. Am I in the Twilight Zone or something? The only two people who could possibly stand out worse than Alex are by the bar with their coats still on. Mom is trying to move to the music. Dad looks like he wants to impale himself with the longhorn to put himself out of his misery. When Mom spots me she waves excitedly and it makes me burst into tears. I don’t know why. I’m just so happy to see everyone. I don’t understand it, but I love it. They make their way across the dance floor to join us. And I hug them repeatedly as I fluctuate between crying and laughing.