Her Name Was Annie

by Beth Rinyu

  “Someone just walked in the house,” I whispered to Jack. He bolted out of bed and grabbed his pants from the floor, putting them on in record time. I hopped out of bed as well, fumbling through my drawers for anything to put on.

  “Where’s Grandma, Maxie boy?” Kara’s familiar voice carried up the stairs.

  “Oh my God!” I whispered. “It’s Kara!” What should’ve been a call for relief in knowing a stranger hadn’t broken in was actually quite the opposite. How on earth was I going to explain Jack being here to her? What the hell was she doing here at 8:00 a.m.? “Go in the guest room,” I demanded.

  “What?” Jack stood in place in a state of confusion while I scurried around the bedroom, picking up the rest of his clothes that were scattered on the floor. “Go in the spare bedroom. I’ll tell her you were here until late last night and were too tired to drive home.”

  “Steph, you’re being ridiculous. You’re acting like that time your mother caught us when we were teenagers.”

  “Yes, and do you remember how that ended? I was grounded for a month and forbidden to ever see you again.”

  “Well, clearly she got over it because we ended up getting married. The same way Kara will—”

  “Just go!” I placed his belongings in his arms and shooed him to the guest room.

  I knew I was being a little ridiculous, but I didn’t want Kara to get any false sense of hope that her mother and father were getting back together. I was in a state of total confusion about what had happened between us the night prior, so I knew she would be even more perplexed over it. “Kara?” I called once I threw on my sweats and T-shirt and Jack reluctantly went into the guest room. I took a deep breath and headed down the stairs. I hated lying to my daughter, but it was for everyone’s own good. “Kara?” I called again. I was relieved to have a few more minutes to pull it together when I looked out the kitchen window and saw her throwing around a stick for Max to fetch. I used that time to calm myself down and prepare a pot of coffee.

  “Good morning!” she shouted as she and Max came inside.

  “Morning!” I turned around to face her. “What are you doing here so early?”

  “I went to bed super early last night, so I was up by five.” She walked over to the knife block and took out a paring knife, then grabbed an apple from the fruit bowl. “I wanted to get out of there before my roommate woke up. Her boyfriend spent the night, and they like to have loud morning sex,” she continued as she took a seat at the island and began to slice her apple.

  “Oh, boy!” I turned around quickly and rifled through the cabinets for some coffee cups, hoping my face didn’t reveal my own guilt.

  “What’s Dad’s car doing here?” Was I being paranoid in thinking she just mentioned the word sex a few moments ago and now Jack? Had she put it all together? “Did you have another leak that needed repair?” My face heated over the drollness in her voice.

  “Oh…he came to go over some things he thought were related to the case of the mystery man in the ocean. It got really late, and he was too tired to drive, so…”

  “Good morning, Dad!” Kara shouted. I sheepishly turned around to find Jack planting a kiss on her head. “What has you here or shall I say…what kept you here all night?” she asked with a hint of a smirk on her face, casting her stare at me, then back to Jack.

  “I was helping your mom with a surprise for you.” I vigorously shook my head as Jack tried desperately to figure out what it was he was supposed to have said. Kara quickly turned her head back in my direction, almost catching me trying to give Jack the signal. “What surprise would that be…a new brother or sister?” She whispered the last part of her question, trying desperately to stifle her laughter and failing miserably. Jack turned away to hide his own amusement over the whole situation.

  “If you must know, wise guy…” I grabbed her hand and pulled her from the stool, leading her into the living room. “This was the surprise we were working on.” She didn’t need to know that we had actually worked on it a few days ago and not last night.

  “Oh my God, a real tree! I love it!”

  “We did the lights. The rest is up to you,” I remarked.

  “Why don’t we change it up this year, maybe get some new ornaments? We can go when you get home from work. Wait a minute, why are you still in your pajamas? Shouldn’t you be dressed for work by now?”

  “Umm…” I looked at Jack. “Why don’t you let me fix you a cup of coffee. I need to fill you in on some details.”

  “Okay…you’re not going to tell me one of you is dying, are you?” She looked at me, then at Jack.

  “No, Kara!” I shook my head. “Jack, did you want some coffee?” I was hoping he would take that as code for I needed you to stay for support. He nodded and flashed me a reassuring smile that let me know he picked up on it right away.

  Kara sat in silence for a few moments after I had filled her in on all of my findings over the past week. It was a rare occasion when she was rendered speechless, and I was somewhat enjoying it. “Why didn’t Nanny and Pop tell you?” she finally spoke.

  “I don’t know. I think because they were afraid of how I would take it,” I replied.

  “Well, that was kind of wrong of them to lie to you your entire life. Don’t you think?” she asked. “I have friends who are adopted and their parents told them as soon as they were old enough to understand.”

  “Kara, it was a different time back then. They thought they were doing what was best for your mom.” Jack intervened.

  “So, this woman who you’re meeting today is your…mother?” Kara asked, seeming to be deep in thought.

  “She’s the woman who gave birth to me. My mother passed away last year,” I corrected.

  “Still, that’s got to be weird for you. Isn’t it?”

  “A little, but I’m going to meet her and see what she has to say, and that’s it.” I shrugged.

  “Did you want me to come with you?” she asked.

  I smiled and reached for her hand. “Thank you so much for that offer, but I think this is something I need to do on my own.”

  “Okay,” she whispered. “So, Dad, no more clues on the man in the ocean?” She shifted topics.

  “None for right now. You’re going to have to put up with Ian for a little while longer.”

  “Who’s Ian?” I asked.

  “The guy who Kara likes to torment. Speaking of which, thank you for finally accepting this temporary arrangement and not giving him any more trouble. He said you’ve been behaving.”

  Kara choked on the sip of coffee she had just taken. “Did you guys need more coffee?” She stood up abruptly.

  “No, I have to get going,” Jack answered.

  “I’m good too,” I said as she scurried off to the kitchen.

  I walked Jack to the front door and grinned. “This morning brought back memories of when she was a little girl and would wake up and then come crawling in our bed when you were trying to get lucky.” The smile that stretched across his face brought me back to every stage in our life together. It was a mixture of that boyish smile from high school, the beaming one when our eyes finally locked as I walked down the aisle to marry him, and the proud one when he held Kara in his arms for the very first time. One small facial expression held so many memories to me. Memories that only he and I shared.

  “Good luck today.” He glanced over my shoulder into the kitchen before planting a gentle kiss on my forehead. “I’ll see you later, Kara!” he shouted.

  Kara bolted to the front door and placed a kiss on his cheek. “Let’s do dinner this week…your treat!” She giggled.

  “Of course.” He chuckled before heading out the door.

  As I watched him walk down the driveway, I didn’t have any regrets over what had happened the night prior. We had gotten through a place in our life that we had been avoiding for far too long, and we did it together. If we…if I could’ve only figured out how to do that years ago, maybe things would’ve been a lot dif
ferent now.

  “Mom.” Kara startled me, causing me to jump. I closed the front door and faced her. “You know, I am twenty-one years old. I can handle hearing that you had s-e-x.” She spelled out the word like I had done so many times before when broaching the subject with her. “Even though the thought of my mother and father doing it makes me want to bleach my eyeballs.”

  I wasn’t going to take the bait and give her the answer she was fishing for. Kara and I were comfortable talking about a lot of things, but what had happened last night was something I wanted to keep between Jack and me. “Kara, you seem to forget the vision you wish to bleach from your eyes is the whole reason you’re standing here today.”

  “Exactly…so what’s the big secret?” She grinned.

  “I’m going to take a shower now!” I shouted as I headed up the stairs.

  “Mom!” Kara called when I reached the top of the staircase.

  “Yes, my love!” I gazed down at her standing on the bottom steps.

  “You know, I’m just joking. I’d be totally okay with you and Dad...well, you know. In fact, I’m really happy you guys are talking again.”

  She looked so grown up as I stared down at her. “Yeah, I’m kind of glad we’re talking again too.”

  “Just don’t be getting yourself pregnant. You’re much too old for that, and I don’t want to be stuck raising the kid.” Just when I thought she was being mature—the jokester came out in her once again.

  “Brat!” I shouted, unable to hold back my laughter.

  Chapter 21

  MY HAND TREMBLED when I placed it on the coffee shop door. Pausing briefly while removing my gloves, I tried to pull it together. I still had a fleeing moment. I could run back to my car, drive away, and forget this woman ever existed. I had lived this long without knowing her, so why did it matter now? I shook my head and gave myself an internal pep talk. I had to do this. There were questions I had for her, not ones I needed to know the answer to, but ones I wanted to know.

  I yanked on my scarf, pulling it loose when a flash of heat overtook me, then shoved my gloves in my coat pocket. Taking a deep breath, I pushed on the door and entered. It was easy to spot her in the quaint little coffee shop where Kara and I would frequent often on the weekends for their chocolate croissants and the best cappuccinos around. I wasn’t sure what it was that made me recognize her instantly. Maybe it was because she was the only woman sitting by herself at one of the bistro-style tables, or maybe it was because I really did feel a connection to her, even though I’d never met her before in my life. Our eyes locked, and in that moment, it was as if I was staring into the mirror at the same deep brown, almond-shaped ones that stared back at me each day.

  She wore her hair in a stylish blunt-cut. It was the same dark brown color as mine, but lacking the natural wave mine had. I was a little surprised by her height when she stood up. She couldn’t have been much over five feet, the same height as my mother. But unlike my mother’s thin frame, she was portlier. I don’t know why I was expecting her to be tall and slim. Maybe because of my own height and build and her other daughter’s as well.

  “Stephanie.” She smiled as tears simultaneously ran down her face. I nodded and smiled back, trying to keep my feelings at bay. I had told myself on the drive there that I wasn’t going to be led by my emotions. I wasn’t going to cry, but as I stood there, staring at this woman who resembled me in many ways, I put myself in her situation, and it was impossible to keep my promise. What if circumstances had forced me to give up Kara, and I was the one meeting her for the first time almost fifty years later?

  “Can I—do you mind if I—” She wrapped her arms around me, pulling me into her embrace before she could even get the rest of her words out or wait for my reply. Oddly, it didn’t feel as if I was hugging a stranger. Instead it felt as normal as could be. “You’re just as I had always imagined you to look for the past forty-eight years.” She placed her hands on my shoulders and gazed up at me with tear-filled eyes. I didn’t know what to say. She had forty-eight years to prepare for this moment as opposed to the short amount of time I had.

  “I’m sorry if I seem a little aloof. I just found out I was adopted about a week ago,” I murmured.

  She nodded. “I know. Jennifer told me.” We both took a seat as Rita, the coffee shop owner, walked over to our table.

  “Hi, Steph. How are you?” she greeted.

  “I’m well, thanks,” I replied as I took off my coat and hung it on the back of the chair.

  “Is Kara home for break?”

  I nodded and smiled, finding comfort in just thinking about my life and the people who were familiar to me. Part of me was wishing I had taken Kara up on her offer to join me for support. “I’m very excited to have her all to myself for the next few weeks.”

  “I bet you are.” Rita smiled.

  Rita looked at the woman sitting across from me, waiting for an introduction, and I found myself getting flustered.

  “I’m Francesca,” she introduced herself, taking the burden off me.

  “Well, it’s very nice to meet you. Is this your first time here?” Rita’s coffee shop was such a huge success, partly because she had the best coffee and baked goods around, and the other part because she was such a personable business owner who really got to know her customers. I admired her for that when so many other small business owners couldn’t care less about their patrons, just the money they were bringing in to them.

  “It is,” Francesca answered.

  “Oh, well, then I must insist you try one of our famous cappuccinos and a chocolate croissant. Just ask Steph, they’re the best around.”

  “The cappuccino sounds lovely, but I’ll pass on the croissant.”

  “And what about for you, Steph? Your usual?”

  “Actually, I’ll just have an Earl Grey tea, please,” I replied.

  “You got it!” Rita said as she walked away from the table, leaving me alone once again with the woman I had so many questions for, but not the courage to ask them.

  “So, I know you probably have a lot you want to know, and I’m willing to tell you everything.” Francesca started as if she could read my mind. “Some of it may not be easy for me to say or for you to hear, but I didn’t come all this way to leave anything out.”

  I nodded. “I’m sorry. This is just all so weird to me. Forgive me if I seem a little reserved.”

  “I understand perfectly. But can I ask you a question I’ve been wanting to know all these years?”

  “Sure,” I whispered.

  “Did you have a happy childhood?”

  That was a question I could answer without hesitation, and one that temporarily put my mind at ease. “I did. It was the best childhood anyone could ask for. My parents were wonderful.”

  She closed her eyes and smiled. “That makes me happy to hear. And your daughter? Jennifer told me she’s twenty-one.”

  “She is.” I reached into my purse and grabbed my phone, then scrolled through my photos for a picture of Kara. Like my childhood, Kara was another topic of conversation I was contented to talk about. “This is her.” I realized after I had placed the phone in her view, the first picture I had scrolled to was one of Kara and Jack taken on Thanksgiving. Kara was a subject I was comfortable talking about—Jack not so much.

  She put on her glasses and pulled the phone closer, studying the photo. “She is stunning, and there’s no denying that’s her dad. She looks just like him.”

  “Yes, that’s Jack.” I cleared my throat. “My ex-husband.”

  “She’s a beautiful girl. You’ve been blessed.” She handed my phone to me, and her eyes dewed up once again. Thankfully Rita came over with our drinks just in time, breaking up any awkwardness.

  “Here you go, ladies, let me know if there’s anything else I can get you,” Rita said after placing the drinks on the table, then walked away.

  “I’m ready to answer whatever questions you have for me,” Francesca said, taking a sip of her cappucc
ino.

  There were so many, I didn’t know where to begin. I wanted to know what the circumstances were that had led her to putting me up for adoption. I wanted to know how she had found me. I wanted to know about her family and possibly about my biological father’s family. They were all questions I could have shot off at her one after another, but I wasn’t going to do that. It was her story to tell, and I wanted her to tell it in the way she felt most comfortable doing. “Why don’t you just start from the beginning, and if I have any questions after that, I’ll ask them.”

  Her hand trembled as she placed her coffee cup down on the table. She said it was going to be hard to tell as well as hard to listen to, but I was prepared to hear whatever it was she was willing to say.

  Chapter 22

  Francesca

  March 1971

  DEAR FRANKIE,

  I haven’t even gotten to the worst part yet, and I already can’t wait to get out of here and come home. I’m finally done with my training and our sergeant says we’ll be shipping out in a week. I promise you, I will come back safely, so we can be together forever. I know that’s the one thing that will keep me going when the days get bad. I don’t care what our parents say, we will be married. I love you more than anything in this entire world and this time apart has made me realize that fact even more. I don’t know when I’ll be able to write again, so please keep this letter with you and remember, I’m thinking of you always.

  Love forever,

  Tommy

  I memorized every single word in that letter, right down to the curve in his Ss and the way his Ms resembled Ns. Tommy Cavlan was the love of my life, and even though I was only seventeen, I knew there would never be anyone else who would come close to him. Our hearts didn’t care that our upbringings placed us worlds apart. My strict Italian family didn’t approve of him because he wasn’t Italian and, even worse, he wasn’t a Catholic. His powerful political family turned their noses up at me because I was Italian and Catholic.