Emma

by Angie Wilder

  Emma lay on her bed and closed her eyes. Propped up against the pile of decorative pillows, she waited for the sound of footsteps. It was a chore to identify anything over her labored breath, the sniffling that wouldn’t stop.

  Kaley shouted Emma’s name as she clomped up the stairway. A moment later, she burst into the room. “What happened?”

  “Evan hates me!” Emma blubbered, and Harry hopped down to hide in a laundry basket.

  “Lord, I hope not. My brother is an idiot. He’ll come around.”

  Emma shook her head. The hopeful words didn’t ring true. “How are things with Ben?”

  “If I’m going by the look on his face…” Kaley flopped onto the bed, scooted herself next to Emma, and settled into the pillows. Her face was red and puffy. “Ben hates me too.” Her waterworks picked up over the proclamation. It would be a long night for them both.

  Emma took her friend’s hand. “He will come around.”

  “I’m sorry about my big mouth. Do you hate me? Are you mad that I didn’t tell you I did the deed with Ben? That he’s the father?”

  “How can I be mad, Kaley? I’ve been a terrible friend. I was so caught up with my career that I wasn’t available for you. I promise to do better.” Emma hiccupped.

  “No. It’s not you, it’s me,” Kaley said. She snorted over the unintended breakup cliché and continued, “I wasn’t ready to say anything. I thought you’d be angry. You once said it would be weird if I liked Ben as much as you liked Evan. You called dibs on a Heartley-Gains relationship.”

  “Dibs? Was I eight years old?”

  “Sixteen. I had just started noticing Ben. I was the one who offered to trade jerseys, remember?”

  “Oh. Well… I figured you were being nice. Didn’t you say this romance was a recent development?”

  Kaley shrugged and sighed. “Yes, and no. First, a harmless attraction. You know, look elsewhere because he’s never going to look back. It peaked four months ago when it became an all-consuming burning desire to rip his clothes off. My emotions are sorta stuck there in the I-want-more-than-friendship, I-want-you-naked zone. I get where you are at with Evan. Hung up on a great guy who will treat you right, make you smile, but how do you get him so over-the-top invested that he’ll see you as more than a friend, to the point he can’t keep his hands off—over and over again?” Kaley rubbed her belly, where a tear had fallen and left a spot. “You had a week. I had one night. It sucks—frustrating to have a sample, learn how wonderful it can be, learn what you’re missing. It’s worse than never knowing.”

  Emma nodded. “For me, it’s the intimacy. The whispered conversation while wrapped in Evan’s arms, in that warm and safe space.”

  “Right. That and orgasms.” Kaley made a wobbly grin. “The excellent ones that give a girl ideas about changing her last name.”

  “You love Ben?”

  “All the way to my tippy-toes. The ass. Why can’t he see that?”

  “He’s a guy.”

  “Explains everything.”

  “You said that you and Ben happened four months ago, so you’re four months pregnant, not five?”

  “Yep. People assumed, and I let them. Mark deployed five months ago… If Ben hadn’t apologized the morning after we…” Kaley paused, stared across the room, then got up to fetch the tissues box and returned. “I didn’t think it was a mistake. I couldn’t have been happier. Until Ben politely rolled out of bed, held his trousers over his johnson, and ran out. It killed me, but I didn’t let on how much I hurt. Like making love was no big deal, just a little oopsy-daisy. I should never have gotten back together with Mark. That was a mistake! His phone call from overseas, ‘You’re the one, Ky. Give me another chance…’ blah blah blah sounded awfully good, soothing my ego, easing my heartache. Did I tell you, Mark can’t even remember my birthday, after three years? Anyway…” She waved her hand. “Two weeks after getting back together with Mark, I took a pregnancy test and…BOOM baby! I’m certain it was Ben’s…and I was relieved! Terrified, but…”

  “I’m sorry you had to go through all that alone. I’ve been distracted.” Emma hugged her friend. “No matter what, I’m here for you now.”

  Kaley sat up and glanced toward the window. “Thank goodness we have each other because the guys…” She let the sentence hang.

  Emma figured there was no positive way to spin how the guys felt about them at the moment, so she might as well confess what she’d said, get it over with. Though the words nearly choked her, Emma spat them out, “I called Evan a self-centered asshole.”

  “What?!” Kaley managed to laugh and cry simultaneously. She was a loyal sister and a good friend, and Emma’s criticism wasn’t one she would likely use to define her brother.

  “I didn’t, but that was Evan’s takeaway from our conversation. How do I explain…?” Emma took a tissue from the box and wiped it under her eyes, dabbing away, checking for mascara, but that was long gone. “The fight happened so fast… It’s just… I was worried about California. And you know how girls chase after Evan? That last one he dumped because she didn’t want their future together to be here in Hillcrest. I’ve been so stressed. My dream job and dream man are in different states. I love him. I don’t know how not to love Evan. I wanted to talk to him about us. Discuss how a relationship could work, but I was so scared we wouldn’t find a solution. That he wasn’t in love with me like I am with him. We’ve only been more than friends for a few days. I wish I would have told him how I felt. Held his hand and asked about our future. Instead, I was angry that he left me in the kitchen when everything got crazy. My words came out all wrong. I wasn’t saying no to love, just to my momma’s extreme assumptions.”

  “He shouldn’t have left. But Emma, Evan’s girlfriend ditched him because she preferred a hockey star, not a veterinarian. When he got injured, she hit the road. It did a number on his self-worth.”

  “What?” Emma’s stomach sunk. She had made an appalling error. “Why didn’t you tell me?!”

  “I didn’t learn the whole story until recently. I figured the last thing you wanted to hear about was Evan’s old girlfriend, the hockey bunny.”

  “Right, bunnies. The celebrity chasers. I guess that might explain why Evan said this awful thing about me being a Hollywood girl. He accused me of thinking I’m too good for my daddy’s practice. Can you believe that? I love the clinic.”

  Kaley picked at a string on the bedspread, then wiped her nose on her sleeve.

  “Is that what you think? Does everyone believe that?” Emma’s stomach twisted.

  “There is nothing wrong with wanting something flashier than what northern Minnesota has to offer. I don’t blame you. Heck, I’ve been waiting for you to date some hunky dog-loving celebrity and invite me down to visit, to swim in his amazing infinity pool, meet all his charming famous friends, and go shopping for fantastic designer shoes that aren’t fit for walking.” Kaley smiled, trying to make light of the dreadful things they all believed.

  “I see.” Emma’s tears picked up. “I’m nothing but a distant, distracted, shallow, rotten friend.” She pressed her face into the pillow.

  Kaley placed her palm on Emma’s back. “Please, Emma, we all love you, we don’t think that.”

  “This is the worse day ever!” Emma hollered into the bedding, not caring who overheard. She was almost certain her family was all downstairs based on the faint sound of muffled conversations. “Fine!” Emma shot back up to sitting and swabbed her palms over her face. “As a kid, I went to work at the clinic. Then I got some scholarships, and my daddy paid the rest of my way through college. Along came grad school. The University of California Davis is at the top. My daddy knows some people and just like that, I’m enrolled. An internship connection and Daddy’s references turned into a job and another opportunity. I’m doing the best I can, and for once it’s not on a handout! I’ve expanded my field to accommodate the wellness market. To make something of myself. To branch out in a direction, a path that wasn’
t paved by my daddy!”

  Kaley’s eyes were round as saucers. “Emma, you never said—”

  “I didn’t realize I had to defend my character to you…to Evan.”

  “You don’t. We are all impressed with you, your accomplishments. Where did you get this idea that you had to prove yourself for the opportunities you were given, like you’re less than amazing because of your family’s success?”

  “People.”

  “Jealous people? You know you’re already at the top of your field.”

  Emma dragged in a deep breath.

  “Listen.” Kaley bracketed Emma’s face with her hands. “Forget about them. From now on you stop listening to people, you hear me?”

  Emma started to laugh over the contradictory statement. How can she hear her if she stops listening? She grinned over the ridiculousness, and some deep knot she’d carried in the center of her core began to unravel, loosen.

  Kaley released Emma’s head and said, “Someone is coming up the steps.”

  “I hope it’s not a parent come to lecture us about our virtue.” Emma frowned. Although airing out her insecurities had lightened her mood, her shattered heart kept the tears flowing. She tried to smooth out the turmoil in the room with a comment bound to make Kaley roll her eyes, “Do you suppose they were blissfully unaware that we weren’t innocent virgins?”

  Kaley snorted and patted her pregnant belly. “Speak for yourself. This was a divine conception.”

  There was a rap at the door, a warning before it opened.

  Emma focused on her brother. His hair stood up at weird angles, his cheeks looked hollow, and his eye flashed with emotion. He took two steps into the room and pinned Kaley with his glare.

  Kaley sucked in a breath.

  “You and I need to chat,” he said.

  She used her shoulder to wipe her face as she scrambled up onto her hands and knees. “Ben, I’m so sorry I didn’t tell you sooner. I wanted to so badly.”

  “You should be.” He cut a glance at Emma, where she sat on the bed dragging in choppy breaths like hiccups, then he returned his focus to Kaley. “I’m angry you didn’t tell me straight off. My god, Kaley, you let me believe my child was someone else’s.”

  Emma’s heart ached for him. She’d never seen her brother like this before.

  “I’m so, so sorry. I regret not telling you about the baby, about how I feel for you.” Kaley scurried off the bed, crossed the room, and reached for Ben.

  He placed his hands against Kaley’s arms, holding her, running his palms up and down her sleeves. He looked uncertain what to say, but after a moment, he spoke, “We’ll work this out. Later.” His voice cracked, and he dropped his hold.

  She captured his hand. “You’re leaving?”

  He looked at Emma. “I want to compose my thoughts. I’m on shift tonight, but first I’m going to Evan’s. We have some sorting out to do.”

  Ben’s face was too hard. Emma sat up straight and cried, “Please don’t.”

  “This is happening, Emma. You girls sort it out your way, we’ll sort it ours.”

  “Don’t do anything stupid,” Emma begged.

  Ben shook his head and turned to Kaley. “Later… we’ll also talk about this.” He pulled Kaley to him and gave her a claiming kiss—the kind that broadcasted his feelings. “Got that?”

  “Okay,” Kaley squeaked. Ben closed the door behind him.

  “Oh, god.” She crawled up on the bedding and lay on her back. “He’s so delicious when he’s mad, who knew?”

  “This isn’t good. I’ve never seen my brother so worked up.”

  “Nor mine. Evan, in the kitchen… Wow. And now, the way we’ve been crying… They will kick each other’s asses.”

  “I hope not,” Emma grimaced.

  Moonlight illuminated the ice as Evan hit the lake. After that fight, the breakup with Emma, he found it impossible to stay still. If he didn’t move, he would drive himself flat-out insane. With his game skates on, Evan picked up his momentum as he cut across the frozen surface. The unusual weather—frigid cold snaps mixed with highs that turned snow into rain—produced excellent conditions for skating. Terrible for fluffy Hallmark holidays, but screw that anyway. Evan took a wild shot, aiming the puck at the net. There were no boards to confine the game, but a wide miss gave him something to do. He’d skate fast, shoot hard, and give chase until his legs or heart gave out.

  The last person he wanted to see was a Gains. But damn if Evan didn’t recognize that shadow coming down the path from the house.

  Ben moved past the boathouse and sat on the bench to tug at his laces. When he rose, he gripped his stick with both hands in a stance ready for play. He dug his blades into the ice and glided out from the shore.

  Evan glanced down the lake to where his final shot had gone deep, and they both took off, in a scramble for the puck. Skates dashed and scraped, wood smacked together, grunts and labored breaths replaced the insults that burned for release. Ben may not have kept with the game, but they’d scrimmaged one-on-one plenty of times over the years. He could hold his own, manage a lucky shot, but not tonight. Evan swept the puck away, dodged, taunted. They battled on, giving chase, colliding, in a struggle for control. They’d been at it for a good half hour. A challenge without the boards, but they both had pent up energy to spare. Evan lined up his shot.

  As it fired down the ice, Ben hooked his stick around Evan’s skate and caused him to stumble. They weren’t wearing pads, the gloves already off.

  Evan regained his balance and broke the silence. “Low move, asshole.” He wasn’t talking hockey.

  “Right back at you.” Ben coasted after the puck, then increased speed as Evan approached.

  “You think it’s okay to have a one-night-stand with my sister, knock her up, toss her aside?”

  “Shut up, Evan.” Ben spun back and drew the first swing.

  It collided with Evan’s mouth. Before he could taste the blood, he’d struck back.

  Ben cursed. He was too slow to defend himself, to knock away the blow, but he got a damn tight grip on Evan’s torso in an attempt to wrench him to the ground.

  “You will have a hell of a shiner in the morning,” Evan said as he pushed back and maneuvered his stance.

  “Worth it.” They struggled to wrestle one another down. Heads bowed, they clutched each other’s shoulders, muscles strained. They were locked together. “And how many cheap nights have you had with my sister?”

  “Shut your face, Ben. There’s nothing cheap about Emma. It’s not like that. It wasn’t a one-night mistake.” Evan jerked Ben’s shoulders, and he almost went down.

  “Right.” Ben twisted and shoved. “She’s home for the holiday, and you can’t keep it in your pants. It’s a vacation mistake.”

  Evan’s shoulder burned. “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

  “Neither do you! Don’t you dare accuse me of something you know nothing about! I should be with Kaley working things through, and I will, I’m crazy about her. But damn…the house…Emma is bawling like there is no tomorrow, you ass! The girls are holed up in her room.”

  “Oh, yeah? I tried to tell her I love her! Turns out, she loves California more.”

  Ben eased up on the tension. “Is that what happened?”

  “Why do you think I’m pissed off? Don’t be so certain I wasn’t the holiday fun.” It was too painful to think about. Evan could feel a trickling sensation on his chin. He licked his bottom lip and tasted blood. “Damn it, I’m bleeding.” He tipped his head to look at Ben.

  His eyebrow was black, and a trail of blood ran down the side of his face. “Me too.”

  They were grown men, professionals, doctors, friends. Evan hung his head. “I’m getting too old for this crap. If I let go are you going to punch me in the nuts?”

  Ben chuckled. “Are you wearing a cup?”

  “The hit still hurts.”

  “So you were expecting me?”

  Evan grinned and let go.
“Damn.” He straightened and pressed his fingers to his lip.

  Ben picked up their sticks and handed one over. “You’re an idiot. If you meant nothing but sex, Emma wouldn’t be crying herself sick. I’ve witnessed some fallouts before but nothing like this. Emma is the reason I’m not with Kaley right now. My sister needs her friend.”

  “What are you going to do about Kaley? The baby?” There was a hell of a lot on Ben’s plate.

  Ben bent over, braced his hands on his knees, and sucked in a breath. “I’m going to be a father. A good one. A good whatever Kaley will agree to.” He straightened and continued, “I let my attraction get the better of my judgment. You’re right to be angry with me. What kind of asshole hops into bed with his friend the second she’s free to see others? I don’t want to be the friend with benefits or the rebound guy. That morning after I woke up realizing…” Ben shook his head. “It was too soon for those words, but having them in my head… It was jarring, and once the idea got a hold, it has been damn difficult to shake. What was I supposed to do? She got back together with Mark. Or so she said. Why would she let me assume that?”

  Evan started to laugh.

  “What the hell is so funny?”

  “Not a dang thing. It’s just…the women have all the answers, and we are the knuckleheads standing out here on a frozen lake, beating on each other.”

  Ben touched his fingertips to his bloodied eyebrow. “That seems reasonable.”

  “Want a beer?”

  “Can’t. Got work.”

  “That ought to be perfect.” Evan gestured to Ben’s eye. “The ER doc that looks like a patient.”

  “It will be a long night, that’s for sure. I’ll talk to Kaley tomorrow. Work it out before that good ol’ Christmas Eve fun the parents have planned.”

  “I’m bracing myself for WWIII.”

  “Surrendering might be the way to go.”

  “For what it’s worth, Ben, Kaley’s not the one-and-done rebound type. That doesn’t sit right. My sister’s about sappy romance.”

  Ben nodded and skated toward shore. “You think Emma’s not invested in what you got going on?”