Mayr watched the loving way Lira caressed Aeley's fingers. They were still happy even after being together for two years, and being married for half of it. They had everything he could wish for them, save a tranquil life. Peace was a luxury Aeley had forfeited after she ran for the election of Tract Steward against her brother.
Since then, her life consisted of governing the tract of Gailarin on behalf of the republic, requiring her constantly divided attention. Whenever Aeley was not involved in the problems of the people, she tended to the requests of the High Council. There was always a meeting with someone, taking up at least half of her time. Magistrates regularly vied to grab her attention for their villages, demanding improvements to everything in their society, more funds, and special requests on behalf of families and individuals who dared not approach her. Councilmen called upon her almost daily with proclamations, amendments to laws, updates on campaigns and projects that spanned the republic, and enough bureaucracy to drown her.
As long as she was Steward, she would remain wedged between the two groups, one of the official middlemen of Kattal's political hierarchy. The people of Gailarin saw the region's problems as everything; the High Council saw Gailarin as one small part of Kattal. Their demands often conflicted and constantly pulled Aeley between them. When she was not in meetings, she divided her time among visits to villages to gauge their well-being, reviews of soldiers and guards, and Lira. There was little time spent on herself.
And that's where I come in. Not just to make sure no one assassinates her, but making sure she stays sane. Kind of wish I could be on Council, though. I could make things easier for her: for them both. And for Mother and Father. For everybody, actually.
"I know. I was just joking," Mayr told Lira softly. "You know I love you, right?"
Aeley patted his hand. "You'd know if we didn't."
A knock on the wall startled them. Someone cleared their throat.
"Pardon my intrusion," a raspy voice said.
"Morning, Haydin." Mayr faced the elderly steward of the estate. Haydin had lived with the Dahes for most of his life. Before Aeley, Haydin had served Aeley's father and ran the estate while Korre dealt with Gailarin business. To Aeley, Haydin was family, the closest thing to an uncle she had. Somehow, he had managed to outlive even Korre, although his frail form and questionable health concerned them all with each passing year.
"Good morning, Haydin," Aeley greeted, her tone cheerful. "Anything I can help you with?"
Haydin bowed his head, revealing the balding patch in his white hair. "Nothing at the moment, but thank you." His dark eyes turned onto Mayr. "Although you have a visitor. Sarene requests an audience."
Mayr jumped up. Not seeing Sarene for several days had disappointed him. More than once, he'd wondered if she had moved on. "Thanks, Haydin." He looked to Aeley. "Mind if I borrow that dismal abode you call a study? I promise we won't do things on your desk you haven't already done with Lira."
Disgust twisted Aeley's expression. "Don't do anything."
"Thanks, Ae." Mayr rushed away without waiting for Haydin.
Sarene stood in the spacious foyer between the main entrance and the wooden staircase leading to the floor above. Her yellow dress and pink shawl brightened the hallway, stealing attention away from the grey and black floor stones set in elaborate, swirled patterns.
"Good morning," Mayr muttered, kissing her before she said a word. He had half a mind to lead her up the stairs to his room. Instead, he grasped her hand. "Let's take this someplace more private."
Their walk through the corridors was quiet. Even as they entered the study, Sarene said nothing. She stopped in the centre of the room, surveying the dark red walls and large stained glass pane looking out onto green trees. An old desk sat across the room, parchments and rolled scrolls littered across its surface. Except for the beige wood panels on the one wall with a coloured target painted on them and dozens of holes, the study was unremarkable.
"I missed you." Mayr closed the door and turned. "Had I known you were coming by today, I would've—"
"It isn't working."
Mayr froze, his smile extinguished.
Not again.
"What?" He forced the word out of his dry mouth.
Sarene sighed heavily as though his question were an imposition. "It isn't working out how I'd hoped. I thought we could get it right the second time, but it isn't any better. I'm just not feeling like it's any different. So we're breaking up permanently."
"Wait, what? You decided this all on your own? And when?" Mayr demanded. "I did everything you wanted, Sarene. You said you were wrong; that you wanted it to work. I did what you asked me to. Then you don't see me for all this time, but suddenly it's over? No discussion, no nothing?"
"I can't fix what's broken." Sarene shrugged. "Besides, I found someone else; a better match. He's more my type. And I didn't decide it all on my own," she said matter-of-factly. "Tash thinks it's better this way."
Everything Mayr wanted to say disappeared, blown apart by one name. "Tash?"
"We were together last night. I told him about us, and he agreed I should break it off."
Betrayal pummeled Mayr. Anger coursed through him in heavy waves. He could not speak. How dare Tash say anything to Sarene; how dare Tash be with Sarene at all. Is this taking care of me? He breaks us up just so he can have her for himself? Nice. So much for respect and all the other things he spewed. I knew it. And here I was tempted to see him and actually give him an answer: to thank him for asking after me because no one ever does. He's just like everyone else, except he got her to do the damage because he couldn't do it to my face.
"Out." Mayr pointed at the door, unable to look at her. He wanted to hit someone. Repeatedly. Myself, though it's kind of difficult to land a good punch when your arms are attached.
"Gladly."
Mayr crossed the room as Sarene passed him without a touch or glance. Stopped beside the desk, he listened to the door close.
He yanked the knife from his belt and threw it at the target on the wall with as much force as he could muster. The knife drove straight into the centre of the target. Lodged in the wood halfway up the blade, it stuck out from the middle of the bright red circle.
Glaring at the hilt, Mayr flexed his fingers. No, he did not know Tash well, but he had believed Tash was more honest than that. He had thought they understood each other in some semblance of the concept, at least enough to possibly forge a friendship. Because whenever they were together, he wanted to stay longer, to know more. He wanted to understand how two utter strangers could seem familiar to one another.
Now he was nothing. Again. And the familiarity was a lie. A trick. An effective manipulation.
With a grimace, Mayr peered at the painting of Aeley's father above the door. "Sorry, Korre. I try not to be a complete disappointment, but I still can't get it right. Even with all your advice. Pretty sure I've got 'patsy' tattooed all over me."
Mayr stared at the target. Knife throwing would not work his anger off quickly enough. He needed more. A better target. To throw his fist at someone hard enough to result in bandaged knuckles.
Maybe I'll haul Pellon off duty. He only has the perimeter shift. I'm sure he'd like sparring with me better than walking circles all afternoon. Goddesses know we've been scrapping since we were fifteen. I'm sure there's something he wouldn't mind whipping me over, some reason I've forgotten. Or we'll make up a whole new reason. Then get drunk. Really, really drunk. Or maybe I should run a surprise training drill. March right into the Guard House and announce it. No, even better; get drunk and then announce it, just so Pellon and I can watch everyone run around this place like it's on fire. Haven't had one in a while, so maybe…
His gaze drifted to Korre's portrait again. Regardless of what he did, he could not tell Aeley. The last thing he needed was for her to smash Sarene's head in and kill her.
He could save Aeley in a battle, but not from the laws and punishment of High Council.
Kno
cks on the door stole his attention. "Mayr? Are you still there?" Haydin's voice carried through the door.
"Yeah." Mayr opened the door. "Sorry, Haydin, I'm just—"
He stepped back, overwhelmed by the urge to punch the man beside Haydin.
"What are you doing here?" Mayr stared at Tash, gripping the threshold to keep from doing something stupid.
Tash took a quick breath. "I wanted to talk to you. I wanted to—"
Mayr threw the door open further, satisfied as it banged the wall. "Fine. Get in here. And you'd better make it good."
Haydin's face paled. Caught between the two of them, he looked from one to the other. "I'll just leave you be." He ambled away and disappeared around a corner.
Once Tash was inside, Mayr slammed the door closed.
Tash did not jump nor did he back away. "I was coming to forewarn you about Sarene breaking things off. I thought I could catch you before she did. But I just passed her on her way out and realized I might be too late." He smiled sadly. "Now I'm here to see how you're taking it."
"How I'm taking it?" Mayr thrust his arms up. "Oh, I don't know. The fact I wouldn't mind ripping someone's head off has nothing to do with it. Or kicking you where it hurts most since you broke us up. You not only slept with her even though you knew she and I were together again, but then you went and helped her out. Sent her here to finish the job you two started. What? I couldn't catch the hint fast enough?" He crossed his arms. "Go on, tell me again how my safety and my comfort are paramount, because I'm sure you've got more pretty lies where those came from."
"They weren't lies," Tash whispered. "And I didn't sleep with her."
"That's definitely not what she said." Mayr snorted. "Sure, break my heart, but you can't even get your stories straight?"
Tash straightened. "I don't know what she told you, but I didn't sleep with her. Not after you took her back. And certainly not after the night you and I met. She wanted to, but I couldn't. Not just because she was seeing someone else, but because I honestly couldn't. Not when I was thinking about someone whose moral character makes hers pale in comparison and nearly non-existent."
"Please. Quit with the priestly riddles and spit it out. Stop insulting me."
"Mayr, please, listen. Not just to my words but between them." Tash stepped forward. "Sarene came to me last night. She wanted something she could not have. Instead of leaving, she stayed to talk. I asked about you since I've been worried. That's when she informed me she was leaving you." He took another step. "It wasn't a surprise to me, I'll admit. And yes, I agreed she should leave you."
When Mayr opened his mouth to protest, Tash raised his hand. "No, it was for you. It's obvious she was using you. She thought the three of us being together would fix the lack she felt in your relationship, but it changed nothing. She also admitted it didn't go the way she hoped; that the fate of your relationship rested on that one night." Disgust drifted across his face. "She whined that you were inadequate and not what she expected. Her words exactly: 'What's the point of being with the mighty Head of the Guard when he's nothing like that in bed? He's supposed to tell people what to do and act all tough. That's what I wanted him to do with you.'"
Anger displaced Tash's disgust, his eyes narrowed. "It didn't sit right with me. She didn't have any right to complain nor say those things. I know you cared for her—loved her—but you deserve better than her. So I encouraged her to end it. I then severed ties with her, myself. That's negative energy best left alone."
"And that's supposed to make it better?" Mayr yelled. "You're just plunging the knife further into my back."
"I'm sorry. I take full accountability for my actions, but I promise I didn't want it to go like this. I told you: we priests deal in truth."
"Truth? Right. You couldn't have just spared me with another lie-that-isn't-a-lie?"
Tash's gaze fell to the floor. "No, not over this." He took a deep breath. "But that isn't the only reason why I'm here. I wanted to check on you. You didn't give me an answer the other day and it's bothered me since. Considering you walked out, I took that to mean you weren't all right. Since I'm already apologizing, I equally apologize for offending you and any harm I inflicted. I should have turned Sarene down when she suggested we be together. I never should have stayed." Hands clasped, he lifted his chin. "I've done enough damage for one day. This wasn't part of my plan. I'll leave now. There's nothing else I can say that won't drive this any further down the painful path."
On his way out the door, Tash paused. "I'm sorry."
For a moment, Mayr believed it, watching Tash leave with a twinge of remorse. The longer he stared at the door, the more the truth dug a hole in his anger. He hurt, but not for the reasons Tash seemed to think. While Sarene leaving him was painful, it was not as bad as he anticipated. Although he knew he should feel worse, he was making peace with it quicker than the first time she left him. Shock may have gotten the best of him as she told him they were finished, but it was not the reason for his anger. That honour belonged to Tash. The depth of his feelings was rooted in the agony of betrayal, twisting his insides.
Despite feeling as if they had known each other forever, they really did not know each other at all.
Chapter Four
Mayr kept his head low. Leaning against the back wall of the ballroom, he kept his arms crossed as he surveyed the guests mingling at the feast. Not just because he mistrusted more than a third of the attendees, but because the last twelve days since the breakup had been long and bitter. He rarely enjoyed socializing at large events. To then add a shattered heart that was permanently staked to self-induced torture made him far less inclined to be friendly. Surrounded by members of the Grand Families, the Councilmen, and other diplomatic guests, he had few kind things to say as it was. At least half of them considered him a servant and nothing more. Their patronizing glances ensured he knew his place.
Given the way he felt, each judgmental glimpse pushed him closer to telling them to shove off, no matter the consequences.
If only he could.
Regardless of his state, he retained what little charm he could for Aeley's sake. She looked happy as lively music filled the air and prompted couples to dance, including her and Lira. Both of them wore gowns embellished with ribbons and jewels, though Aeley was dressed in black while Lira had chosen dark blue. And while Aeley appeared elegant with her blonde hair up, she wore her boots, refusing to don the dainty shoes expected at such a function. If she needed to kick someone out, she had said, she wanted to be comfortable.
With a brief smile at Aeley and Lira's playfulness as they moved, Mayr swept his gaze across the room. From corner to corner of the grey stone walls he observed everything, taking no small space for granted. The dark green banners, orange-red tapestries with autumnal scenes, and cascading arrangements of yellow flowers and bundled chaffs were as suspect as the unlit corners and small spaces beneath the bright green tablecloths. From what he could tell, he knew all of the attendees from previous events, and he knew things about each of them. No strangers lurked in the room. Still, he was thankful for the precautions Aeley and he had taken. All weapons had been noted before the feast began and any hint of a blade was monitored. The food was minded with care. Extra guards had been assigned to the perimeter of the estate, the inner grounds, and within the house itself.
And if Etalynn rails on Lira, or even so much as grabs her in the wrong way, I have a special cell prepared so she can take a nap. Or a long overdue reflection. She will treat Ae and Lira with respect or she's out.
Mayr glanced at Lira's parents, still in their seats at the dining table, which ran the length of the ballroom. Etalynn, dark-haired and grey-eyed like Lira, sat to her husband's right and observed from beneath lowered lashes. Since their arrival, she had kept her hands to herself and ample space between her and Lira. She watched her daughter from a distance, although the image of her jerking Lira's arm during Aeley and Lira's wedding feast was difficult for Mayr to forget.
; Best he could tell, after being ripped away by Aeley and Mayr during that previous display—accompanied by an outcry for decorum from her peers—Etalynn had learned her lesson. From what he saw, she had spoken little during the current feast and limited her interactions, although not by her design alone. Seated beside the second son of the Laeros family, a Grand Family in the southern tract of the republic, there was little to say when he avoided Etalynn. Only her husband, Asha, spoke to her.
Even fewer guests spoke to Asha.
An older man with grey hair and blue eyes, Asha resembled the other aristocrats in his long coat, elegantly embroidered tunic, dark pants, and dark gloves. Yet looks could not save him from long stares and silent snubs. Many of the Dahe family's supporters avoided him at all costs. His transgressions against Korre were unforgivable. Even more since his sons had shown that the poison of the Derossa family still remained.
And that's justice for you. I hope you're enjoying it, you no good piece of—
"Are we having fun yet?" a voice asked from beside Mayr.
Mayr turned his head toward Pellon. Tall and muscular with short, red hair, Pellon was difficult to miss. Wearing leather armour and thick metal bracers, he appeared more intimidating than he truly was. Together they leaned against the wall.
"No more fun than staring at a bunch of aristos as they get drunk. Oh, wait—" Mayr slapped his forehead, "—that's what we're doing."
Pellon chuckled. "Glad to see your mood has improved some." He feigned a wince. "I'm still hurting from that last beating. You sure you didn't trade your fists for, I don't know, anvils?"
Mayr snorted. "You're one to talk. I have a bruise this big on my side still, you massive oaf," he countered, holding his palms one hand's length apart. "I need my ribs, you know, just in case you forgot."
Four Page 6
