Vampire's Shade 1 (Vampire's Shade Collection)

by Vivienne Neas

  Chapter 18

  After I got some painkillers into my system, I started to feel like I wasn’t on the brink of death anymore. My right eye was still swollen almost shut and the lopsided vision annoyed me, but my head wasn’t throbbing as much and the pool of despair I’d been set on drowning myself in had somehow been drained.

  It still hurt to move. Something horrible ached in my ribs, almost like they were broken, but I knew from experience that the truth was much worse.

  When Sensei was done with me, he offered me coffee.

  I hadn’t had something as simple as coffee in a while, and when he handed me the cup the warmth traveled into my hands and up my arms. It was nice. When had I last focused on something that was just nice?

  “What do I do now?” I asked.

  I wanted to go get Aspen. I could tell she was still alive. That half of me didn’t feel like it had died yet, and if I focused very hard I could still find her pulse, although my headache made it harder.

  Now that my spell of self-pity was over and I felt like I could carry on again, a terrible anger bubbled up inside of me – the kind of anger that could roll over into rage if I wasn’t careful. The kind of anger that had me attack my father after he had hurt my sister.

  “Now you decide if it really was worth it, being a one-woman show all this time,” Sensei said.

  I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. Asking for help wasn’t my strong suit. In fact, it made me feel weak to rely on someone else. Besides that, I wasn’t good at trusting anyone else, so this was really a tough one.

  “Everyone who’s gotten involved so far has gotten killed, and that was without me asking them.”

  Stubbornly, I could still place some of the blame on them for getting involved, because it was what they had wanted. Ruben had taken on a job that was too much for him. My fault because I’d messed around. His fault because he’d been stupid. Joel had known what hacking could do; he’d gotten the warnings. My fault because he would do anything for me without asking. His fault because he knew what his line of work could bring down on his head.

  Zelda’s death, on the other hand, had been all my fault. She’d protected Aspen when I couldn’t. What was happening to Aspen was my fault because I’d taken a job I was arrogant enough to think was easy.

  I was starting to realize that the arrogance and pride I’d been building for a while were ridiculous. I’d been playing in a kiddie pool when there was a whole ocean out there. And I’d crowned myself queen of the world, thinking I was winning.

  The truth was, I hadn’t been winning at all. I’d been losing – and the only person I’d fooled was myself. Ruben had been using me as an assassin for lower-class problems that no one tried to sort out any differently. I was a murderer, hiding in the dark, nothing more.

  I was starting to realize I couldn’t beat Celia, not because she was that good, but because I’d never really been good enough.

  Now I wanted to take on master vampires because of the mess I’d created in my ignorance. And I had no idea how all of us who were left would make it out of this alive.

  “What if we all die?” I asked.

  Sensei shrugged. “None of us will be around to remember it, in that case.”

  I chuckled without much emotion. He knew how to hand me the truth. Then I took another deep breath. “Sensei, will you help me?”

  He looked at me and smiled. “Sure,” he said, like I’d asked if I could borrow a book.

  “You may die,” I pointed out, suddenly feeling like I’d made a mistake. He looked way too happy to be involved in this. Maybe he didn’t understand.

  He shrugged again.

  “Maybe this isn’t a good idea,” I said. He was a great guy, a good teacher, and the only ray of hope in this horrible mess. I didn’t want to be the reason for his death.

  “I’ll help,” he said. “You asked. It’s all I’ve been waiting for.”

  I sighed, and he rubbed his hands together like he was eager to get going.

  “Call me Phil,” he said.

  “Phil…” I said, trying it on for size. It seemed strange to call him by his first name. It made us seem… equal.

  “Right. Now. Who else can you call?”

  I thought for a moment, then pulled out my phone. Carl answered on the second ring.

  “Can you meet me?” I asked. I gave him the address and he promised he would be here shortly. I wondered if the man ever slept. I never seemed to catch him during his downtime.

  He arrived at the Martial Arts Academy in less than twenty minutes. When he walked in, he and Sensei – Phil, I should say – sized each other up like boxers in a ring.

  “Carl,” he said tightly.

  “Phil.”

  The atmosphere was tense as they looked each other over. But then it eased, and they shook hands. Whatever had been happening had been smoothed over between them without any words. Somehow, they had decided they liked each other.

  “So, what’s up?” Carl asked me.

  “You said you wanted in on the action.”

  He nodded.

  “My sister and my IT guy have been taken by master vampires who are a hell of a lot stronger than the ones we’ve been pretending to be boss over. They also have a deadly cat woman as a pet, and she won’t stand down. I want to go get them.”

  “Do you know where they are?” he asked.

  “No idea.”

  He nodded, looking thoughtful. “Do you know how to defeat master vampires and this… cat lady?”

  I shook my head.

  Carl looked like he was still thinking, and to be honest I expected him to say no. I wanted him to say no. I wanted him to go home where he could be the asshole I didn’t like, because I preferred asshole Carl to dead Carl.

  But he shrugged in much the same way Phil had responded, like it was no big deal. “Sure,” he said.

  These two men in front of me were willing to sacrifice their lives to help me. And here I’d been thinking I was crazy.

  “So, what’s the plan?” Carl asked.

  I hesitated. I hadn’t really thought that far ahead.

  He barked a laugh. “Two humans and a half-breed? I don’t know. You’re good, Adele, but I think we need something else.”

  He was right. As offensive as he was, he was telling the truth. If we wanted anything good to happen, we needed something else on our side.

  Someone else.

  “I have to go,” I said. “I’ll meet you guys back here in an hour.”

  “Are you going to get someone?” Carl asked.

  “I don’t know. I’m… gonna try.”

  Then I turned to leave, but not before I noticed the look Phil and Carl were giving each other. It wasn’t very friendly, but I didn’t have the time or the energy to worry about them.

  A minute later, I got on my bike and pulled out. Just maneuvering a machine that was technically too big for me took more effort than I would have liked. How was I going to fight if I had this many injuries? Hopefully my vampire blood would work its magic and heal me up quickly.

  I was daylight, and I didn’t expect I’d have much success. But I had to try, one last time. There was only one person who knew the masters well enough to help me. Jennifer knew them, but she was just a human, and it took a vampire to know a vampire.

  The house was quiet and shuttered when I pulled into the driveway. I’d left the engine on so he’d know I was coming, but maybe he wasn’t even at home. I was feeling too frail to hope for anything more than walking out again with my dignity intact.

  I walked up to the front door. Or rather, I limped up to the front door. My legs were fine, but I kept feeling like I wanted to double over, like that would ease the pain the bruising had caused. I paused before I rang the bell. I tried to take a deep breath, but the expansion of my chest hurt ten times more than when I’d simply been walking.

  I rang the bell and swallowed hard. I never even blinked when I was staking a vam
pire. I was a boss with my gun and my leathers. But the idea of ringing a doorbell and talking to a man sent me into a cold sweat. Maybe Joel had been right. I was built backwards.

  “You’re going to have to open it yourself and let yourself in,” said a muffled voice from the other side. “The sunlight is a problem for me.”

  Of course. It was heading on towards late afternoon. I was getting sloppy, forgetting even simple facts. I had to pull my act together.

  “Can I come in?” I called, certain that when he heard that it was me he would say no.

  Well, then, I’d bang open the door and demand that he see me.

  Yeah, right. Me and what army?

  When he said “Yes,” it threw me off guard, almost to the point that I didn’t know what to do next. I’d expected a struggle, and apparently there wasn’t going to be one.

  I opened the door. Inside, the house was dark and warm, almost humid. I wondered if he’d had the heater on. Then I wondered why. I closed the door behind me, and the only bit of light that had bled into the blackness disappeared.

  I stood still for a couple of counts, just getting used to the darkness. “What do you want?”

  Connor’s voice flowed around me, deep and caressing, like when I’d heard it the first time. It was a melody that I wanted never to stop listening to. My eyes were getting used to the dark, but I still couldn’t see him.

  But I could smell him. It was the same scent I’d smelled in the alley that morning, when I’d dragged him out of the pending dawn. The smell that had surrounded me the first time I’d come here to take him out. The smell that had made me surrender myself to him when I had nothing left but the raw side of me.

  “I asked why you’re here,” he said again, because I hadn’t answered him.

  “I need your help,” I said. “And why should I help you?” he asked.

  His voice was harsh, and I flinched. “There’s no reason why you should,” I admitted.

  “I don’t understand you,” he said. “One minute you’re kissing me, and the next you’re trying to kill me, and you didn’t seem very sorry about it.”

  “I was,” I said quickly. “About the killing, I mean. I regret it.”

  I regretted the kissing, too, but not for the same reason. I regretted shooting him because I’d been pushed into something I hadn’t wanted to do at that point. I’d been scared. Scratch that – I’d been terrified. I’d learned that love could kill.

  I regretted kissing him because I’d let myself get emotionally involved with a mark. I’d been weak. I’d dared to love someone again, and I was scared that with that weakness, I’d never be able to save Aspen.

  “I don’t think I want to play this game anymore,” Connor said, and his voice was cold enough to drain all the warmth from the room. “Please…” I started, but I didn’t know what to say. Besides, I was begging. And I hated begging.

  “Dammit, Adele—” Connor started, then he flipped a light switch.

  Light flooded the room and I winced. It hurt my eyes, my concussed head. But Connor didn’t wince or cover his eyes like he had before.

  He simply stared at my face, and all hostility drained out of his eyes.

  “Oh my god,” he whispered, letting his gaze roam over my bruises and the way I was trying to hold myself up. “Who did this to you?”

  “Please help me get Aspen back,” I asked again. “I can’t do this alone. You know them well enough to tell me what to expect.”

  Connor took a step closer to me, and I felt my knees wobble. I didn’t have the strength to stay upright for long if he was going to come closer to me. He already had me weak in the knees. I couldn’t handle his pity on top of everything else.

  He kept moving until he was right in front of me. I straightened up and took a deep breath, trying to ignore my ribs. Connor lifted his hand to my face like he was going to touch my eye, but he didn’t.

  “I’m sorry,” he said.

  I shook my head and wished I hadn’t. “I’m the one who should be sorry,” I said.

  Connor put his hands on my shoulders, lightly and tentatively, like I might break. Gently he pulled me closer to him, and for the first time I let him do it without a fight. There were no guns involved, no knives, no battle of wills. It was just Connor, the man I loved, and me, leaning against him.

  “I’ll help you,” he said finally, and my body sagged with relief. He held on to me, his arms wrapping around me, and I let him hold me up for a second before I took my own weight again.

  “We just need information,” I said as I pulled away from him and looked into his eyes. They were deep blue, like the ocean, and I wanted to drown in them. But there was no time. “Can we meet here?”

  “Who’s ‘we’?”

  “My martial arts instructor and a colleague. We’re going to get my sister back, but I don’t know where to start.”

  “You’re taking on the masters with two humans?” he asked, looking at me like I was crazy.

  I shrugged. I felt like cursing, because I kept forgetting I couldn’t do the body language I usually used. Every inch of me damn well hurt.

  “I don’t really think you should go in there alone,” Connor said, and I didn’t appreciate how know-it-all he sounded. But then his face softened. “Not if they did this to you. They’ll eat you alive.”

  He didn’t mean it figuratively. I shivered.

  “You can’t come, though,” I told him. “They want you dead. What better time to kill you?”

  Connor chuckled. “Don’t tell me you’re trying to look out for me now. You’re a walking conflict.”

  “I don’t have anyone else to ask. My people are all missing. Or dead.”

  The last words were so heavy, I felt like I might crumble under their weight. Connor must have seen something in my expression, because his eyes changed, got lighter and deeper. They were ringed with a dark green, although I could swear they had been midnight blue a moment ago.

  “I don’t want you to go alone,” he said. “Get them to come here, and we’ll talk. And tonight after dark, we’ll head out.”

  “I won’t let you come with us,” I said.

  “And I won’t let you go without me.”

  I was too tired to argue. If we all died – well, then we were all dead. There was nothing more I could say about that.

  I pulled my phone out of my pocket and dialed Carl’s number. I gave him the address, and he promised to be there in half an hour. He would bring Sensei.

  Phil. I was going to have to get used to calling him that.

  I let them in when they arrived while Connor hid somewhere so the sunlight spilling in couldn’t fry him. When the door was shut and everything was drenched in artificial light, he came out.

  Carl looked like he was irritated. I wasn’t the only one who had had issues with being on friendly terms with vampires. But if I could come around, he could too.

  “Behave,” I said. “He’s one of us.”

  “Don’t you mean you’re one of them?” he asked, and even though his mouth was smiling at me like he’d intended for that to be a joke, his eyes didn’t laugh along. He’d been serious. And I supposed he was right.

  Phil looked at Connor with wide eyes. When Connor spoke and Phil caught a glimpse of his fangs, he turned a shade paler. It was one thing to know every trick in the book about fighting when it came down to humans, I figured. Getting to know the night world, even if you were just skirting the edges of it like Phil was doing now, was a whole other ball game. I wondered if he was revising his fighting technique in his mind.

  Connor seemed calm, even though we could both smell Phil’s nervousness.

  “He doesn’t bite,” I said, and Carl snickered at my poor choice of words. “Well,” I added. “He won’t bite you, anyway.”

  Connor smiled and Carl chuckled, but Phil didn’t look like he thought it was funny. I guessed that until now, he’d really just been thinking this was all a fairy tale. Vampires
were damn scary when you came down to it. I was just used to them.

  “Okay, so, what’s the plan?” Carl asked.