by Emma Vikes
How was it that the man I had to look most presentable for was my own father?
The doorbell rang and I felt like the sound echoed up to my soul. I was at the edge of the staircase, frozen in place. It had been years since I’d last seen him. After I flew to Miami, I’d never heard a word from him. I could see Leo opening the door and then staring at him. He seemed surprised. He never met my Dad but I’d shown him pictures of my family, back when everything seemed to be perfect with my family.
“Where’s Eleanor?” His voice sounded clipped and formal and I could hear the disgust in his tone as he regarded Leo.
I rushed downstairs, not wanting any argument to break out between the two of them. I knew my Dad well enough and I knew how Leo acted too. He was triggered too easily if he wasn’t too keen on the person. “Dad.”
Both men turned their attention to me and from my peripheral view, I saw Leo suck in a deep breath. I gave my Dad a kiss on the cheek. “It’s been a while.”
I turned to Leo. “Can you give us a moment?”
Leo glanced at my Dad and nodded. I wondered for a moment if he was going to introduce himself but he must’ve felt the tension between me and my father and he headed back to the kitchen. When I turned back to Dad, he jutted his chin to where Leo disappeared to. “You’re a lawyer for Pete’s sake, Eleanor, and you’re dating a hobo?”
I swallowed, resisting the urge to argue. “Why are you here, Dad?”
Dad regarded me with his fathomless brown eyes. He was always so serious and with eyes as dark and deep as his, it was undeniable for you to be scared of him. “So you want to cut to the chase?”
“You drive to work in ten minutes. I know you don’t want to waste your time on me.”
His jaw clench and he narrowed his eyes into slits. “Your position in my firm still remains open, Eleanor. You came back to Irving to work for Leeson and Blake. Are you trying to insult me?”
My hands clenched into fists and I bit back my tongue for saying anything rude that might anger him even more. “No, Dad. Leeson and Blake offered me a position. I just accepted theirs and not yours.”
“Why?”
I couldn’t really look him in the eye but I still answered. “Because I wanted to be hired because I’m good and not because I’m your daughter.”
Dad scoffed. “Did you really think you were offered because you’re a good lawyer? Maybe they did it to spite me. You’re a disappointment, Eleanor. I had such high hopes for you. I’ll see in your court.”
I let out a shaky breath the moment he slammed the door. I was chewing on my bottom lip, fighting the urge to cry when I felt strong hands on my shoulders, slowly turning me around. I met Leo’s face, a small smile on his face. “I’m sorry I eavesdropped but if he was the father you used to talk so highly about in the past, I’m fairly disappointed.”
“You’re not the only one.”
Leo cupped my face with his hands and forced me to stare into his piercing, gray gaze. “Sometimes, it’s the people we love most that disappoint us even more.”
The tears fell slowly and Leo wiped them away. Slowly, he pulled me into a hug, letting me cry gently on his shoulder like I used to before whenever I was frustrated with myself and then he whispered to me, “For what it’s worth, you’re not disappointing. Actually, you’ve become more than I can ever imagine you could. It scares me that I might not deserve you that’s why I wanna make sure that I deserve you, Ellie. So please stop crying. He may be your Dad but he sure as hell doesn’t deserve you.”
CHAPTER 9
Leo
“You know, sometimes I think that you’ve been abducted by aliens and replaced by this responsible guy I thought you could never be,” Everett commented the moment I opened my bedroom door. He was sitting with his back against the wall, opposite of my bedroom door. His glasses were askew and his laptop was sitting on his lap, a cup of half-drank coffee sitting beside him. Everett had this tendency of investing himself too much on what he was working on to the point of exhaustion.
“When was the last time you got a decent sleep, Ev?” I asked, holding out a hand to help him stand upright. He grabbed my hand and I pulled him, holding his hand tightly since his grasp wasn’t too firm.
Everett shrugged. “There’s this murder-suicide issue that we have. But I think...I think there’s more to it than just that. Alexa won’t believe me-,”
“Alexa?” I interjected, my eyes glinting with amusement. Everett had had his fair share of girls. He dated around but his relationships never lasted because he was always too invested with work. “So you finally agreed to have a partner, huh?”
“I shouldn’t have done so,” Everett grumbled, shutting his laptop close and grabbing the cup of coffee off the ground. He staggered to his room, complaining, “She’s not of much help. This would’ve been easier to handle if I didn’t have to discuss everything with her.”
He opened his bedroom door and staggered inside but paused for a moment and looked at me. “You really like her. I thought it was just a phase but you usually don’t last a week. Its true when they said, there’s going to be one girl that changes you. I think you’ve found her, Leo. Don’t screw it up again.”
And then Everett slammed his bedroom door shut and I stayed rooted where I was standing, in my jogging pants and plain black shirt. I hadn’t showered. I’d come to realize last week that showering before arriving at Eleanor’s wasn’t a good idea because Max would request that we play basketball after his Mom leaves and before we eat lunch and get him ready for school. I was disgustingly sweaty for the first two days that I brought him to school and during my shoots. So I started to bring a change of clothes and hygiene essentials and showered in their guest bathroom.
Eleanor didn’t mind.
To be honest, she seemed to be getting used to my presence again and there was no longer this unwarranted tension that shifts from anger to sexual tension between the two of us. I had a feeling it was because of what happened with her Dad. It wasn’t supposed to be something that I should’ve witnessed but I was there and as much as I wanted to leave them alone, I didn’t really like the way he regarded her. I didn’t care if he was her father.
I would’ve intervened had I not notice how well Eleanor had stood her ground.
She keeps on surprising me. The Eleanor I used to know wouldn’t have had it in her to talk back to her Dad like that. She used to tell me stories about her family and I’d always thought that they were this picture-perfect American family. But whenever she talked to me about her Dad, I always had the feeling that she was always trying her best to make sure that he was proud of her, as if she was walking on eggshells when it came to him which was why it was so surprising for me to see her defend herself to a man that I always thought she was scared of. What she used to assure me was just respect, I always viewed as fear.
My phone buzzed and I checked the notification. It was an email. I’d found a perfect studio last Saturday and had already escrowed the payment. It would take about a week or less for the payment to come through but I already had a really good feeling about the location of my new studio. Besides, it gave me a sense of fulfilment. I used to like the idea of freelance photography because I get to be wherever I wanted but now there was this place that people could come into and there wasn’t the hassle of having to hold up a meeting in a café or diner.
But the email wasn’t about the studio. It was from the guy I had asked to develop the picture of Eleanor and Max, the candid one I took of them during dinner the day we first arrived in Chicago. I had it blown up, wanting to surprise Eleanor with the photo by hanging it on the wall of their living room. She had started buying decorations for the house last Saturday but there weren’t enough wall pieces that made the house felt like theirs, so I took it upon myself to have the picture blown up and printed on canvas. I decided to pick it up after I dropped off Max from school.
“You’re late,” Eleanor commented when I walked through the door. She left me the spare
key since it was logical for her to do so if I would be the one to bring Max to school. Max was already in the kitchen, still in his pajamas and playing with his toys on the table. I ruffled his hair and then smiled at Eleanor who just placed a breakfast casserole in the middle of the table. She handed me the plates and I set them up on the table.
“Did you miss me that much already?” I teased, sitting down beside Max.
Eleanor made a face but there was a small smile on his face. “I can pick up Max later. You can accept the other shoots you’ve turned down this week.”
Eyebrows rising, I looked at her. “How’d you know about that?”
She shrugged as she took a bite of her food. “I overheard you on the phone last Wednesday. You can book those shoots again later after the ones that you have to do today and then tomorrow since its Saturday.”
I pursed my lips to contain my smile. “So now you’re concerned about my work?”
She rolled her eyes. “It’s how you make a living, Leo. Maddock may have paid you well for the years that you’ve worked for him but money doesn’t last very long.”
“Hmm, I’m not sure about that statement. Maddock paid really well. It was a loss for me to resign.”
“Then go back,” Eleanor mumbled, focusing her attention to her food. So Maddock was still a sore spot between us but I guess that was expected.
I washed the dishes after we finished breakfast because Eleanor had to get ready for work and she left at around 7:45, reminding me again that she’ll be the one to pick up Max since her Mom wanted to see him. Max and I did his homework at the dining table before we started playing basketball and then I told him to shower while I made lunch. I didn’t really know how to cook and after feeding Max mostly sandwiches last week, I knew I had to improvise this week with better lunch ideas.
After finishing the chicken salad, I checked on Max. He was only in his underwear and was sitting on his bed, trying to read a book out loud and groaning whenever he stuttered. “Hey, bud. What are you doing?”
He held the book tightly in his hands. It was a book of poetry. Last Wednesday, Eleanor told me that I had to drop Max off at the firm since they had an appointment with a therapist. It was for his stutter. He would have an appointment with her every Monday, Wednesday and Saturday to get rid of his stutter.
“They told...me that...I should...read...this book...be..cause it’ll...help me.” He was trying to speak fast, thinking that it was the normal way to do so. I knelt down beside him and took his hands.
“Calm down, Max. Breathe in and out. Focus on your breathing, okay?” I instructed him and he nodded. I picked up the book and then held it on his lap. “Now start reading slowly. Don’t try too hard. Just try your best.”
For about thirty minutes, that was what we were doing, practicing reading without him stuttering on any word. It wasn’t easy but Max was persistent. After our reading session, I showered quickly and we ate our lunch in the car so he wouldn’t be late but he didn’t mind. In fact, he seemed to enjoy the hassle we were in, it was fun for him.
I parked the car and then grabbed his bag and held his hand as we made our way to his classroom. Just as we were outside the door, Max tugged at my hand and I looked at him. “Yes?”
There was a shy smile on his face as he tugged me a little hard, forcing me to stoop down a little and then he wrapped his small arms around my neck and whispered, “Thanks, Leo.”
I swallowed a lump in my throat as I watched him dash inside the classroom. I needed a moment to collect myself. I waved at Max goodbye before I left and then headed straight to where I was supposed to meet a client. The shoot I had was for a local magazine here in Irving and the model they had was undeniably pretty.
If this shoot was done, say, about a month ago, I had a feeling that I would probably end up in bed with her. It was surprising how a lot of things could change in such a short amount of time. I mean, who would’ve thought that I could actually stick to just one girl?
I was in the middle of the shoot when my phone vibrated in my pocket. It was a text from Eleanor.
I know I’m supposed to pick up Max from school but something came up. Is it okay if you do it? Drive him to Mom’s place straight after. She wants him to stay overnight. I’ve already discussed it with Max. I’ll send you the address later.
“Hey, we have to finish this shoot up early. Something came up for me,” I told the crew and they all looked at each other. “We’re nearly done, anyway. Just a couple more shots, Mia.”
Mia pouted and then walked closer to me. She traced a finger on my shoulder blades. “That’s a pity. I was actually looking forward to having dinner with you, Leo.”
I cocked my head to the side. “I don’t think that was part of the deal, Mia.”
She pursed her lips and then traced her finger over my jaw. “Other models told me about you.”
“All good things, I hope.”
“So maybe you can prove to me that what they told me were all true.”
I scrunched up my nose and then shook my head. “I kind of have a kindergartener to pick up after this shoot.”
She visibly paled after that. “You have a son?”
“I guess you could put it that way.”
She backed off of me after that. To be honest, she had been flirting with me all afternoon and I’d turned a blind-eye to it and kept myself professional. I could even hear the whispers from the crew about how weird I was being. I’d worked with this crew before and they knew how flirty I could be with the models. Half an hour later, I called for pack-up and made sure that I made it on time Max’s school ended.
He was surprised to find me waiting for him since Eleanor had told him earlier that it’ll be her but I explained to him and he didn’t seem to mind. He was actually excited to spend time with his grandmother. I think they’d had dinner with her last Sunday and I didn’t force myself into it since I wanted Eleanor to spend time with her family without me in the picture. I knew my boundaries.
I texted Eleanor that I’d picked up Max and she sent me her Mom’s address right after. It was a fifteen-minute drive from Max’s school and I walked him to the front door. I rang the doorbell and an older woman- an older version of Eleanor who had the same golden eyes as her, dulled by age and experience- opened the door. She looked at me for a moment, her gaze calculating until her eyes fell on Max and her gaze softened, opening her arms wide and enveloping him in a hug.
She kissed the top of his forehead and told him to go inside and that Yves was waiting for him there. She then turned back to me, “You must be Leo. Max wouldn’t stop talking about you last Sunday. I’m Imogen, Eleanor’s mother. It’s good to finally put a face on the well-talked Leo that Max wouldn’t shut up about.”
She offered a hand for me to shake and I slowly did, smiling warmly at him. “I see where Ellie gets her looks from.”
Imogen smiled and then trouble flickered in her eyes. “Edmund- my ex-husband- he set a meeting with Eleanor and if I know my daughter, even if she doesn’t want to see him, she’d agree to come. I don’t think it’ll end well. I wanted her to come here after the meeting but she told me that she’ll just head straight home after. They’re estranged, Leo, so if you could, please make sure she’s okay.”
I could sense the concern in her tone and I nodded my head instantly. “I’ll head straight to her house now so I’d be there when she arrives.”
Imogen placed a hand on my cheek and patted my face lightly. I left right after that and stopped by the shop that I had the frame made and then hurried to Eleanor’s house. Her car was already parked in the driveway when I arrived and it was only thirty minutes before 7 PM. I left the frame in the car, still intending to surprise her with it.
The door was unlocked when I twisted the knob and I was immediately greeted by the sight of Eleanor in the living room, two six-pack beers on the coffee table. Four bottles were already empty and there was a fifth in her hand, half-drank. Her hair was untied and messy and she was staring
blankly at the newly purchased TV. She looked up when I came in.
“Leo...” she called me and then she smiled, slow and languid and tilted her head to the side as she looked at me, “care to join me?”
I made my way towards her and grabbed the bottle from her hand just as she was about to take another gulp. “You’re drunk, Eleanor.”
She shook her head. “I’m tipsy. Not drunk.” She waved her finger right at my face, waving it back and forth. “No, no, Leo. Not drunk.”
I sighed and then set the bottle on the ground, away from her reach as she tried to tackle me to get to it. “Ellie, you don’t like drinking.”
Eleanor scoffed and then pouted at me. “I did thanks to you.”
“What?”
“You broke my heart, remember?” Eleanor said, looking at me with a smile. “Funny how heartbreak can change a person entirely.”
I swallowed and then let out a shaky breath. She reached for another glass, popping the bottle open with the bottle opener at her side and then downing half of the drink. I tried to grab it from her but she shook her head, hiding it behind her. “Please stop this, Ellie.”
She closed her eyes and then leaned back on the couch. “I disappointed him. I was nothing but a disappointment to him, Leo. I got pregnant with Max and despite the fact that I had a son who needed me, I went back to school, I went back to law because I knew that was what he wanted. But what was the point of it all when at the end of the day, I was nothing but a shameful disappointment to him.”
This side of Eleanor was familiar to me. It came out each time she disappointed herself with the result of the exam she worked hard on or whenever the professor assigned her something that was harder than the rest of her classmates. Some of the professors knew her father and some of them held a grudge on him that their resentment became hers to receive.
