Courts and Cabals 3

by G. S. D'Moore

  “Lawyers.”

  “Well . . . when you put it like that,” I accepted the cup of mouthwash from the dentist and started to rinse. She didn’t say a word. She was as dull as I imagined everyone about to collect a government pension was.

  It had been less than twenty-four hours since our merry band of ass kickers returned to Vegas from our little Tijuana vacation. Getting back across the border, without ID, had been easier than I thought. I literally remembered it like it was yesterday.

  I was still putting on my pants when Dani stepped out of Thomas’s office, still dripping cum from her tits, to address the imps. “We exfil in five. Move your asses, people,” she’d ordered.

  I braced myself to face the music, and walked back out. The coeds were there waiting for me, all in different states of shock. None had seen me rip the guys arm off through the gate during the Tikal’s probing attack. Night and Skella were still in the dark about the monster inside me, but Butters wasn’t. She’d seen the beast before, during, and after. She’d taken cover during the battle royale in the parking lot, but she saw me change. She saw my Mr. Hyde and my twisted grin as I kicked the ever-living shit out of a duke of the Tikal Cabal, an ancient Nosferatu, and strung him up from a tree like a piñata at a quinceañera. Then, as an encore, she’d watched as I busted my nut over not one, not two, but three different women. It goes without saying, things were a little bit awkward.

  She wouldn’t even look at me, but she didn’t need to. Skella got all up in my face. “Get. Us. The. Fuck. Out. Of. Here,” she seethed, but I didn’t back down.

  From my perspective, the Terra mage had been virtually useless in the fight. Night had my back, and I’d seen Butters taking on more than her fair share, but Skella . . . I’d put the Aesir away, but he wasn’t buried that deep.

  I used my height and mass to lean over the smaller woman. She involuntarily took a step back at my aggressive posture. “We’re leaving in five minutes with the people with guns. Do what they say, shut up, and you’ll get out of here fine. Don’t, and I’ll leave your ass here to answer to the federales.”

  “Wha . . .you can’t,” she sputtered. The girl clearly didn’t have people stand up to her nearly enough.

  “I can, and will. I don’t like you,” I was so close, she could probably smell Fern and Dani on my lips. “I could care less what happens to you,” I looked over her head at the others. “I want to make sure you two get out of here. I’ll get you somewhere safe. Get you the help you need, and then you can go on your way.”

  “No way. We’re going home. I . . .” Skella started but shut up when I glared down at her.

  That’s how I convinced the three coeds to ride back to Vegas with me; shock, awe, and more than a little intimidation. We hopped in a stolen van an imp found, hopped the border with a little help from my glamour, and were back in Vegas in time for Caesar’s five-star breakfast.

  I’d barely gotten any pancakes before I was ripped away to meeting after meeting with Marcella running interference. She was good at interfering. I’d known that since the moment I met her. It was just nice that it worked in my favor for once.

  “Let’s just say the UN is a little pissed about the disappearing act you pulled,” the vampire continued as she took a seat next to the dwarf while the dentist returned my chair back to its full and upright position.

  “I didn’t disappear. I was kidnapped,” I growled.

  “That’s your alleged testimony as far as they’re concerned,” she lawyered. “They have to verify that you were indeed taken to the Faerie realm.”

  “Was that what the enema they gave me this morning was for?” I asked, trying not to remember the unpleasant experience.

  “It was,” she gave me a toothy grin.

  “Down girl,” Dani stated, without looking up from her magazine.

  Marcella waved her off. “They’ll be able to detect fragments of the alternate reality in the specimen, but that leads us to the rest of the testing,” she nodded at the dentist packing up her gear.

  Of the dozen “tests” I’d been through, half of them had been called debriefings; which, was government talk for asking me the same fucking questions six different ways and trying to get a different answer out of me. I’d nearly snapped one pompous prick’s neck. How many times could I tell them I got kidnapped, my ass beaten, saved by my extra-terrestrial half-brother, and then escaped through a rip in the fabric of our reality that dumped me in the donkey-show capital of the western hemisphere. It was so simple.

  Dentist lady left without a goodbye, and was immediately replaced by an elderly man. For all I knew, all the UN agents and contractors were lined up in the hallway like I was Stan Lee here to sign autographs.

  “RIP buddy,” I didn’t actually know the man, but I think we’d be friends. Hell, maybe my crazy adventure would make a good movie.

  I felt a tingle go up my spine as the man sat down in the vacated seat. I knew what that meant.

  “Ah, hell no,” I jumped out of the seat and retreated to the far side of the room. Putting Dani between me and the Anima mage.

  “Don’t be a baby, Cam,” the dwarf was still balls deep in her gun porn. “This will clear your name.”

  “Yes,” Marcella nodded. “Certain someones, who the UN wishes to remain anonymous, have been saying that you’re a bad boy. We didn’t technically complete the deal we reached back in New York, but if we prove you acted in good faith, and were indeed kidnapped, then it will not be voided. The last thing you want is to go back to being a lab rat; right?”

  I tried not to flash back to Frank’s prostate exam. I didn’t know how deep the Anima mage could get his tentacles in without me knowing. Fortunately, the man was looking at Marcella.

  She just grinned at him. “Try it, big boy. Let’s take a trip down the rabbit hole.”

  The mage shivered, and turned his attention back to me. “I can’t blame you,” I thought at him. “That’s a whole bucket of crazy over there.”

  The man grinned at my mental statement, and then asked permission to look into my mind.

  “Since you asked nicely,” I affirmed, and then tried to assert some control over the process.

  The experience was closer to what happened with the judge back in NYC than Amanda back at St. Vincent’s. I didn’t fall into myself and thrash around in the dark as memories rushed past me. If anything, I was a greater participant. It was like me walking the mage down the hallway of my subconscious and politely opening doors to my memories so he could see. I was able to show him only what I wanted, and when he tried to reach for a nob to something more private; like the first time Lilith blew my mind, and my cock, I slapped his metaphysical hand.

  My guess was this all had something to do with my burgeoning magic. Butters had tried to teach me the concentration techniques back in the Mexican motel, but we were too busy trying to stay alive for me to really take the training seriously. Plus, I’d been so reliant on my Fae gifts, and Aesir powers lately, the fact I could do mortal magic at all was playing second fiddle to the chaos in my life. Now that things were starting to slow down a pinch, I was going to need to look into that.

  Apparently, my mind and body were already one step ahead of me. Being able to participate in a process only an Anima mage was supposed to control was just another sign things were getting more interesting by the day. Or more fucked up. I guess it would depend on who you asked.

  “I need a drink,” I thought as I showed the mage a slow-motion recap of the pain I felt when Godric, the butt-ugly goblin, got too close to me with his cold iron mail at the center of Winter’s power.

  “Okay,” the man cringed and rubbed his temples as he pulled out of my mind. “Thanks,” he couldn’t get up fast enough.

  “Wait, is that all?” I called after him. “We haven’t even gotten to the good stuff!”

  Dani laughed as the door shut behind him.

  “That’s lunch,” Marcella stated. On cue, the door opened again for room service.

&
nbsp; Anyone would think the amount of food being wheeled in was gluttonous, but none of them had fought a Nosferatu and been generally beat to shit before that. It takes calories to fuel the magic that heals broken bones, torn muscles, and busted up faces. I’d been running near empty since I got back to the mortal realm. Butters had helped me get some strength back, only to undergo yet another ass kicking, before letting out my inner monster. Talk about whiplash; mental, physical, and emotional.

  I wasn’t about to share that with Marcella. I wasn’t even sure why she was here. The cabal had an army of lawyers, so there was no need for her to fly in from wherever she’d been to observe all of these interactions with government stooges.

  We ate in silence; or, at least I ate. Marcella sipped on a lovely ’98 Chianti B Negative, while Dani salivated over the latest Benelli shotgun. We could have been the punchline of a bad joke.

  “A dwarf, a vampire, and a half-human walk into a bar . . .” I don’t know how It ended, but I’m sure there was property damage.

  I belched after my thirteenth porkchop, and sipped on a flat Coke. I know pop is bad for you, but I needed the sugar. It made me feel all tingly inside.

  “What’s the rest of the day look like?” I asked.

  In addition to playing lawyer, Marcella was playing secretary. Sexy assistant if my hind brain had anything to say about it. I had to continuously remind myself she was a vampire who’d tried to sodomize me with a strap on, and would love to take another bite out of me. The Aesir looked forward to the challenge, but I wasn’t game. At least, not right now.

  “Different life, different me,” I thought. I wasn’t willing to test it, but I wasn’t sure the elder vamp would have an easy time bespelling the Aesir. If the Nosferatu’s saliva was any clue, she better not try and pull that shit again.

  “Training,” the vamp stated. “You’re scheduled for four hours with Lark. He wanted to see what you’ve learned since you’ve been gone. Plus, he’s doing our own debriefing to make sure you don’t go all Manchurian Candidate on the first board member you come across.”

  I nodded. That made sense. If I was trying to kill someone as powerful as Lark, or Venus, I’d mind fuck someone they trusted to assassinate them. I didn’t want to get ahead of myself, but the Aesir in me might actually stand a chance. Don’t quote me on that; but I should at least be able to kick Peter’s micromanaging ass now. I cracked my knuckles expectantly. I was eager to test my new self in that regard.

  “You did ask to see the college girls before they left. If you want to do that. We should head down to their suites soon. We’ve got a car coming to pick them up and take them back to San Diego in an hour.

  “No more UN shrinks?” I asked, getting my hopes up.

  “Not today,” she grinned. “But I’d be ready to give fluid samples tomorrow.”

  “Great,” I sighed. “Out of one fire and into another,” that was my life nowadays. I just had to hope it was a walking-across-hot-coals kind of fire, and not an inferno shitshow.

  “I can do this one on my own,” I waved the girls back into their chairs. “I see you want a little extra time with Mr. Smith and Mr. Wesson.”

  “You joke, but he’s long, hard, and never lets me down,” Dani shot back. I wasn’t even going to contest that. I learned to let the dwarf have the last word long ago.

  Butters, Skella, and Night were sharing a large suite only a few floors below my impromptu medical laboratory. I nodded to the imp on guard near the elevators. I’d promised the girls protection, and that onus fell on the cabal, but no one actually thought they were in any danger right now.

  The Tikals in norther Mexico were in fucking chaos. That’s what happened when you chopped the head off the snake. The last day had seen a shit ton of bloodshed as the lesser lords jockeyed for power. The Mexican federal government was even considering a state of emergency declaration. Of course, the Tikals had people in the government blaming it all on the cartels; so, everyone on the networks was yelling at each other like a bad telenovela. Meanwhile people died in the streets.

  I felt bad. I’d technically caused it, but not that bad. Afterall, it was him or me. The answer to that question was simple. “Not my problem,” I’d tuned out the news coverage as much as possible.

  The real dangers to the girls would come when they got back to campus. We didn’t know how much intel the Tikals had on them, but they could come after them as a matter of honor. I just hoped Thomas and family were there to dissuade them. Despite our urgings; Ariana, Ivanna, Lucia, and a barely conscious Thomas had elected to stay in Tijuana. Their response was simple: this was their home, and they weren’t abandoning it.

  The Aesir in me didn’t like leaving Ariana behind, but even its barbarity drew a line. I wasn’t going to bash her head with a rock and drag her back to my cave. She was a big girl. I had an open invitation to come and see her, and her sisters, whenever I wanted. As enticing as that visual was, I didn’t think I was heading south of the border anytime soon. Killing the duke made me enemy numero uno on the Tikal’s shit list. Yet another thing I had to deal with.

  “For someone so new to the scene, I sure do have a lot of enemies.” At some point, I had to look at the situation and wonder if I was the problem.

  That was a problem for future Cam to deal with. Right now, I stuck my hand in my pocket and cradled a gift. It wasn’t much, but it was the least I could do. I knocked politely and waited for them to answer. We’d all had enough of people kicking down doors for a while.

  Night answered, and she must have known I was coming. She was wearing a belly-shirt, no bra, and tight pants. Her pierced nipples were a bigger draw than a neon, XXX titty bar sign for truckers in the bible belt. Every time I saw her, I was pretty sure she was down to fuck. Surviving a life-threatening scenario could do that to a person, but it was supposed to lessen over time as you got your shit together. Apparently, twenty-four hours wasn’t enough time.

  “Hey,” her voice smoldered.

  “Um . . .yeah, hi,” I replied. “Are you all here?”

  She didn’t take the statement as a rejection, and waved me in. Skella and Butters were sitting on a couch watching a movie I’d never seen. It had a young Sean Connery in it, so I should probably check it out.

  “Good news,” I told them about the car.

  “About fucking time,” Skella glared at me. “You take us all prisoner, drag us here against our will, and lock us up. I should call my lawyer.”

  “Yeah, your luxury resort prison, with five-star cuisine, and incredible views. Poor baby,” I bit my tongue before I could say any of that out loud. I didn’t like Skella, or the person she was going to become. It was best to leave it at that and hope I never saw her again.

  “I’m staying,” Night replied succinctly. “I’ve been commanded by the Dark Lady to remain by your side.”

  A discussion ensued with Butters and Skella trying to convince her to come back to school. Why was she jeopardizing her future? What was she going to do about her student loans? They were all valid questions, and I didn’t have any of the answers. I didn’t know why Night wanted to stay, and while my ego might think my dick had something to do with it, I wasn’t that deluded. I’d need to keep an eye on the mage. She couldn’t pull the shit she did that got her into this mess in the first place. There was not going to be any coke, bra smuggling if she stayed with the cabal; at least, I didn’t think there was. I didn’t know everything the cabal was into. I just hoped drug smuggling wasn’t on the list of approved activities.

  I sat back until the argument between the ladies petered out, and it became apparent Night wasn’t going anywhere. Mostly the arguments came from Butters. Skella gave it the old college try, but in her typical fashion, didn’t give a shit about anybody but herself.

  That made what came next that much tougher. “Butters, can I talk to you for a minute?” I gestured toward the door to one of the bedrooms.

  She hesitated, which stung a bit, but nodded. I left the door open a jar so
she didn’t feel trapped. That was the last thing I wanted for her.

  “Butters, look I . . .” I struggled to find out how to start, despite running this through my head a dozen times throughout the morning.

  “Cam,” she put out a hand to stop me. “You don’t owe me an explanation. You’re a big boy, and I’m a big girl. We can deal with this like adults,” she looked a little sad when she said it, but determined.

  Butters was a big girl; in mind, body, and spirit. She’d handled stuff where most women would have pissed their panties and run screaming to their therapist for extra-strength Percocet. Not only had she saved my ass, but she’d fought for her friends. Even though one of those friends was leaving her, and another really didn’t give a shit. Butters was the real deal; a genuinely good person. Those were rarer than unicorns in this day and age.

  I sincerely wished we’d had more time to get to know each other. If we’d met on an actual college campus, and not a Mexican back road, things might have been different. We could have had a legit date, that could have led to something more. None of that was going to happen. We were in different places, doing different things, and as awesome as she was, I wasn’t going to drag her into the suck with me. My place was here, and there were women with me who would help me fight my battles. Just not her. She didn’t deserve that kind of responsibility, even though I knew she’d probably say yes if I asked.

  Still, that didn’t mean I couldn’t give her a reward for all the shit she’d been put through because of me.

  “That’s fair,” I forwent everything I’d practiced saying and got out my gift.

  It wasn’t much. It was a little bit of pink crystal attached to a gold necklace. She let me put it on her, and admired it in the mirror.

  “It’s really nice, Cam. Thanks,” she gave me a friend-zone hug. The Aesir grumbled at that, but I told him to go pound sand.

  “That’s not all,” I pulled on my Fae power and felt the white fire in my gut. I slowly reached out and touched the crystal to activate the spell.