Forbidden Shifters Complete Series (Books 1-6): A Wolf Shifter Paranormal Romance
Page 139
She smiled. “That they are.” Her smile faded. “Actually, if they knew what I’d been planning, they’d have jumped on a plane to kick my ass too. To be honest, I don’t think they’d be very partial to your plan either. They really don’t like the idea of me being in harm’s way.”
He flinched. “My plan is to put you in the way of as little harm as possible. If it were up to me, I’d do all of this alone. But I really don’t think the Director will rest until he’s confirmed on his own that you’re not as extraordinary as I’d originally thought you were.”
“You told him I’m extraordinary?”
He side-eyed her. “Of course you’re extraordinary. For starters, you have the most sophisticated sense of smell I’ve ever heard of a shifter having before. Not to mention that you and your brothers are three isolated newbie weirdos who grew up completely divorced from any human culture. You were broke and freaked out and had no outside loyalties besides to one another. You were practically begging to be indoctrinated. In fact, it’s kind of lucky that I’m the one who got to you. You know how many cults there are in Portland? Maybe you should thank me. Instead of linking your bank account to the Great Father’s and hailing your alien forebearers, you’re just on a free road trip to Florida.”
She blinked at him. That was the longest speech she’d ever heard him give and she didn’t understand almost half of what he was referencing but she could see from the crinkle next to his eyes that he was joking. Joking was good. Awkward silence was not. He could tease her all he wanted if it kept him from lapsing into self-recrimination again.
“Florida? That’s where we’re headed?”
“Yeah.”
“Hmm. Have you ever been there before?”
He nodded. “Disney World. When I was kid.”
She laughed in delight at the expression on his face. Two parts nostalgic, one part sheepish. “What’s Disney World?”
He pulled a face at her and shook his head. “Jeez, you don’t know the Beatles, don’t know Disney World. I really was a shitty mentor.”
She frowned and pushed playfully at his shoulder. She couldn’t get enough of this goofy side of him. Their sex last night had been so vulnerable, so intimate, so intense, that she never would have guessed that she’d gain access to this sweet side of him. He seemed lighter somehow. Like he’d been wearing a heavy cape over his shoulders and he’d just left it behind this morning. She wanted him like this forever. “You weren’t a shitty mentor. I mean, glaring betrayal aside, you were actually really good for me.”
He side-eyed her. “You were good for you. I just had to make sure not to get in the way.”
“That’s not true. Don’t sell yourself short. I wouldn’t have had any idea what to make of the human world without you. You were so patient. You taught me how to drive. How to read. How to swipe a debit card. You never did get around to the whole bicycle thing, though.”
“See? Like I said. A shitty mentor.”
Now she was the one side-eyeing him. “You do that a lot. Put yourself down.”
“I haven’t had a whole lot to be proud of, Dawn.”
She could have pushed, but she didn’t want to go back to all the reasons why this was too hard. Why he was bad and she needed to get over him. She didn’t want to hear another word of that. All she wanted was the flash of his teeth when he smiled. The way he’d pressed his eyes closed so hard last night. The gasp of his breath against her skin. She’d known when he’d been losing control last night. She’d reeled him back in, kept him with her. She couldn’t think of anything else that had ever made her feel like that.
Needed.
Utterly necessary.
“You have some things to be proud of.”
He smirked at her, completely skeptical. “Name one thing.”
She paused. “You’re a truly excellent specimen in your bear form.”
He snorted. “You’re reaching.”
“No! Really!” She nodded her head vigorously. “A truly gorgeous bear. And let’s see… what else? Your home is lovely. Decorated so nicely. Not everyone can make their house feel like such a home.”
The playful expression dimmed, but not in a bad way. Just in a sort of… thoughtful way. “That was my mom’s teaching. She was adamant about that sort of thing. She’d never want me to live in a bachelor pad.” He glanced at her. “Hence the matching throw pillows.”
“They were very nice pillows.” She patted his hand and wracked her brains. “What else? Hmmm. You got me to talk to you in like two weeks flat. That was pretty impressive considering I’d resolved to never speak to you as long as I lived.”
His eyebrows rose. “Really? You were that determined? Why?”
Dawn played with the ends of her hair. She’d had hair down to her waist for as long as she could remember and was still getting used to her new lob. “You were the first person I’d ever been forced to be around. Sasha and his family, that was always a choice. It was because his family liked my family and I liked him and he liked me. There wasn’t anything complicated there. It was easy.”
Quill frowned and grunted and for some reason that made giddiness rise in Dawn’s gut.
“But then,” she continued, “my brothers and I were just plunked straight down into the human world and I didn’t want to be there. The only reason I stuck around was because I wasn’t going to go anywhere without them. And Phoenix was too injured to run. So we stayed. And then Phoenix fell in love with Ida and we really stayed. And then Orion with Diana, and at that point I knew I wasn’t going anywhere for a while.
“I guess, at the beginning, when I still had hope for living in the mountains again, you represented the end of my life as I’d known it. Here you were, this intense man who I could tell didn’t like me, poking at me to get me to talk and do this and that and learn this and that. And I just wanted to be left alone.”
“You thought I didn’t like you?”
She arched an eyebrow at him. “I know you didn’t like me.”
“That’s not true. If anything, it was the opposite.” He glanced at her, obviously weighing how much information he should give her. “Look. At the beginning, it was Orion and Phoenix that I was interested in getting to know.”
Her arched eyebrow arched even further.
He chuckled. “I admit I underestimated you. You have mad skills compared to your brothers, okay?”
“I guess I’m not mad that you weren’t originally targeting me for your whole kidnapping indoctrination mess.”
He cleared his throat. “But I did like you. That was the whole problem. I liked you right away and it made it almost impossible for me to do my job. I didn’t want to betray you.”
Silence hung in the car before Dawn suddenly clapped her hands together and made him jump an inch off his chair.
“That’s another thing you should be proud of! You came back for me. When you changed your mind and didn’t want me to get carted off to the Director. You stormed the soldiers and stood between me and their guns. You didn’t let them take me. You should definitely be proud of that.”
He frowned and his knuckles went white against the steering wheel. “I should never have let them try to take you in the first place.
“Coulda woulda shoulda. I’m here, aren’t I?”
He groaned and shifted in his seat. “Dawn, you’re forgiving me too fast. It’s… weird.”
“Are you going to betray me again?”
His eyes burned into hers. “No. Never again.”
“Aren’t you the one who’s about to risk his life to make sure that my brothers and I are safe from here on out?”
“I guess.”
“Do you have to be doing this?”
He eyed her. “No, I guess I don’t.”
She shrugged. “See? There you go. That’s worth something right there. It means something to me. Life is too short to hold grudges.”
He opened his mouth to say something but instead started squinting in the rearview mirror.
> “What is it?” she asked.
“Nothing. I just thought for a second that I’d seen that car before. Somewhere else on the road. But I think I’m losing it a little. I keep feeling like we’re being followed.”
“We were sitting ducks at the B and B. Don’t you think they would have attacked us if they knew where we were?”
She turned and looked out the back and saw a black SUV that looked exactly like every other black SUV on the planet.
“Yeah,” he said huskily. His playful demeanor from before was gone, apparently dissolved with the reminder of how much danger they were in at every second. After about ten minutes of tense driving, Quill relaxed and the black SUV was nowhere in sight.
A few hours later, they stopped for lunch at a little sandwich joint off the two-lane highway they’d been traveling along. Dawn didn’t even know what state they were in.
“We’ll have to find someplace to pull off and practice,” Quill muttered, almost to himself.
“Practice what?” Dawn asked, swirling some fries through a tiny mountain of ketchup.
“Making you look incompetent.” He sighed. “Honestly, it’s gonna take a lot of work. You’re pretty freaking talented.”
She laughed. “Thanks.”
His eyes clouded and he looked down at his plate.
Resting her chin on her hand, she eyed him carefully. “Is this the part where I have to remind you once again that you’re a good person and that I’m not too good for you?”
He laughed and shook his head at himself. “God, no. No more of that. I’m well aware of the fact that my self-confidence has been your problem for the last two states. My mom would kick my ass if she could see me right now.” He sighed again. “Look, I know I have my issues. I’m far from a perfect person. But I’m going to try not to let that get in the way. I’m gonna be good for you, for however much time we have together.”
There was something in the way he said that last part that nagged at Dawn. His tone implied that he didn’t think they’d have very long together and she wanted to know why. Certainly they had their obstacles. And even when they were done with this whole throwing-the-Director-off-their-scent mess, they would still have all their personal shit to wade through before they could really be together. Did he not think that they could make it through all that? Did he even want to try? Were her brothers the issue? She wouldn’t want to have to deal with them if she were him either.
She sighed again and rubbed at the ache behind her brow. “This is all a lot easier in my romance novels.”
His lips pursed but his eyes crinkled in a smile. “This is kind of a small town but I could probably find a kilt somewhere. Not sure if I can do the accent, though.”
She burst out laughing. “Oh, jeez. I read one highlander romance novel and you never let me forget it.”
She enjoyed the moment, watching him laugh with her. He just looked so young, so easy, so carefree when he actually let himself laugh.
An idea started to form but the moment was too light for her to want to spoil it with serious questions. It could wait.
Instead, she squinted across the road to the stand of scrubby trees that led up and over a small hill. “What about there?” she asked, pointing with a nod of her head. “For practice. I’ll be able to smell anyone coming, to tell if we’re alone.”
“Sure. That’ll work.”
They paid for their meal and slipped out the back of the restaurant, not wanting to draw attention to the fact that they were not getting in their car right then. Dawn scuttled across the road when the traffic cleared and Quill followed her a few moments later.
She was already hidden in the trees when she heard him coming up on her, and coming up fast. It was animal instinct that had her laughing and sprinting away from him. No shifter could possibly just stand there while someone or something chased them through the woods. She was up and over the hill, further into the woods, dodging trees, the sound of the road now completely blocked out when two strong arms clasped around her waist. Him laughing, her shrieking, he lifted her bodily off the ground and hugged her close, her back to his front.
“Gotcha,” he whispered into her hair, his breath hot on her neck.
Well, two could play with the element of surprise. He wanted to rev her engine by chasing her through the woods? She could rev him right back. She twisted her head and caught his mouth, her tongue immediately pushing in, a moan hot on her breath, her hands twisting up to reach for his hair.
They were both panting, sweating, and hot from the sprint, their hearts banging in their chests. For a moment, she was certain that he was going to pull away from the kiss, insist that they get down to business and practice, but then one of his hands snaked under her shirt. It splayed across her belly before moving up and cupping one breast over her sports bra. He pushed that aside, his thumb finding her nipple as his kiss became more demanding.
She tested the bonds of his hold, wiggling a little and moaning when he only held her tighter. He walked her forward, pried her hands out of his hair and pressed them firmly against the pine tree in front of her. And then his hands were everywhere. Her stomach, her thighs, her throat, her breasts, her hair. She pushed back against him.
And then his fingers were underneath the waistband of her yoga pants, kneading the flesh of her ass, sliding toward her front.
“Yes,” she hissed, tipping her head to stare blindly at the sky. He found her wetness with the pads of his fingers and it brought her up to her toes. She scrambled to push her pants and underwear over her hips.
“Are you sure?” he rasped, but she could already hear him scrabbling with his belt, his pants getting unzipped.
“Now,” she gasped, pushing her naked bottom half against him.
And then he was there, all hot heat and fingers inside her, stretching her open, the blunt push of the head of his cock. Every glorious inch.
Normally, when she was out in the woods, Dawn’s senses were incredibly heightened. She could see a water droplet on a leaf thirty feet away. She could catch a scent on the wind ten miles away. She could hear a doe brush against foliage on the other side of a mountain. But right now she was nothing but sensation. Every other sense zeroed away as she concentrated all on touch. On the steel velvet push of Quill. The grip of his hands, his breath on her neck as he bent over to press a kiss to the top of her spine.
She braced herself against the tree and leaned into him, trusting him to support her as he pushed further into her. He pulled most of the way out and she braced, expecting him to slam back into her. But when he pushed in again, his stroke was easy, quick, almost… light. She could practically scent the happiness, the rightness that was emanating from him. She’d never felt more wanted in her entire life. She understood completely what he’d told her that morning. That their sex made him feel like he was in the right place at the right time.
He used a skilled hand to lightly work her clit and again, Dawn found herself on her toes. He was bent over her again, kissing her neck, huffing her scent, bracing her weight against him. She went careening over the edge, her fingers digging into the bark of the tree, her head thrown back.
She felt him stiffen even further inside her, the clench of his grip, the heat of his breath, and then he was gathering her to him, supporting her weight, holding her close.
His mouth opened against hers and she could barely breathe with the intensity of his kiss. His mouth was everywhere then, her throat, her cheeks, her hair, her bottom lip, her ear. She gasped for breath.
“I’m never going to let anything happen to you,” he told her, and she could hear in his voice that this wasn’t a statement, this was a vow. “Never.”
His grip didn’t let up. Gently, Dawn eased herself back, tipped her head up to see his expression tight, his pupils blown out. The release of his orgasm hadn’t relieved his tension. If anything, he was winding himself up even further right now.
Something became clear in that moment for Dawn, as he clasped her to him lik
e she was the very last foothold before he tumbled into hell.
And that something was this: he was falling in love with her.
It all made so much sense now. The more he loved her, the more he was terrified of anything happening to her. And even more than that, the more he sensed her feelings for him, the more scared he got of whatever was going to come next.
She guessed that likely no one since his family had properly loved him. And here he was, traumatized as hell, trying his best to navigate this kind of wanting. He’d inured himself to everything but lust. And now he’d tripped and fallen headfirst into love. That was enough to shake anyone up.
Her heart opened to him, even more than it had in the past. Understanding him was such a relief. His behavior was making more and more sense to her every day. It broke her heart, but it made sense to her. She hoped there would be a day soon where accepting love was a given in his life.
“Hey,” she whispered, running her hands up and down his arms, soothing him. “Let’s run.”
She stepped back and started stripping off her clothing. He stared at her for a second in confusion and then understanding gathered in his eyes. He stripped down as well and shifted wordlessly alongside her. Dawn was exhilarated as she bounded through the pines, Quill right behind her.
She kept her speed low, knowing that, though bears were very fast, they weren’t quite as agile as a wolf through the trees. This wasn’t about racing, this was about burning off their remaining energy. They’d been cooped up in that car for too many days.
She ran until she needed a break and when she collapsed on the ground in a heap, she was shifted back into her human form again. He collapsed on top of her, man not bear. They sweated and panted and breathed and eventually laughed as the light got long between the trees and the afternoon gave way to evening.
“Not much of a practice, huh?” she said after a while.
“How did you know I needed a run?” he asked, balancing his chin on top of two stacked fists.
“You were looking like your feelings for me were about to give you a panic attack,” she said, gently stroking one hand down his cheek. “I figured you could blow off some steam in your bear form. It would be good for you.”